15 episodes

Welcome to Still Not Asking For It. A Podcast brought to you by Hope Harbor, a sexual trauma recovery center in south central Kentucky hosted by Alayna Milby and produced by Melissa Gerard. Still Not Asking For It will have regularly released episodes where Hope Harbor staff, volunteers, and community partners will discuss significant issues survivors of sexual assault face and the complexities of rape culture through an intersectional lens.

Still Not Asking For It Hope Harbor

    • Health & Fitness
    • 4.6 • 8 Ratings

Welcome to Still Not Asking For It. A Podcast brought to you by Hope Harbor, a sexual trauma recovery center in south central Kentucky hosted by Alayna Milby and produced by Melissa Gerard. Still Not Asking For It will have regularly released episodes where Hope Harbor staff, volunteers, and community partners will discuss significant issues survivors of sexual assault face and the complexities of rape culture through an intersectional lens.

    Purity Myth: Shame & the Social Construct of Virginity

    Purity Myth: Shame & the Social Construct of Virginity

    Content warning: shame after sexual assault, rape culture

    In this episode, Mel and Alayna are sharing their personal experiences growing up Christian and the values pushed onto young people about sex. We are coming from the place of people who were assigned female at birth, raised Christian in the Bible belt, and advocates within the anti-violence movement. We share our personal experiences and opinions in this episode, but we want to hear from YOU! Please follow the link below to send us your voice memos about sex and shame to be included in a future episode. You can also email us. 



    *We are asking for voice message submissions through Anchor for a future episode about virginity, purity myth, and the pressures/shame we feel around sex, specifically sex for the first time. Your submission will be kept anonymous and you will be notified if your submission is used in the episode.

    This podcast is brought to you by Hope Harbor, A Sexual Trauma Recovery Center where we provide free, confidential services to anyone impacted by sexual violence in south central Kentucky. For more information on services and ways to get involved, check out our website hopeharbor.net where you can also find our blog, Thanks for Asking.

    Our theme is Girl Tones' Can't Pause. Girl Tones is a 2-piece punk rock band based out of Western Kentucky. Check out their website girltones.com 

    For questions or topic suggestions, you can email us at crisisintervention@hopeharbor.net

    You can call us 24/7 at 270.846.1100 for questions, resources, or someone to talk to.

    Thank you for hanging out with us!


    ---

    Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/still-not-asking/message

    • 55 min
    Pt. 2 Consent and the Bachelor

    Pt. 2 Consent and the Bachelor

    This is part two of a two part episode. In this episode, Kellie McClure from Ampersand Sexual Violence Resource Center in Lexington, KY joins Mel G. and Alayna to discuss consent in reality TV, specifically the Bachelor and the Bachelorette. From contracts, to producers, to sex: what are they really able to consent to? Our conversation covers these themes and mentions of sexual assault and harassment on the shows. Mel G. and Kellie are well-versed in Bachelor Nation, but our conversation explains details for those who may not have ever watched an episode (like Alayna). Consent, or lack there of, is everywhere in our culture. 

    *We are asking for voice message submissions through Anchor for a future episode about virginity, purity myth, and the pressures/shame we feel around sex, specifically sex for the first time. Your submission will be kept anonymous and you will be notified if your submission is used in the episode.

    This podcast is brought to you by Hope Harbor, A Sexual Trauma Recovery Center where we provide free, confidential services to anyone impacted by sexual violence in south central Kentucky. For more information on services and ways to get involved, check out our website hopeharbor.net where you can also find our blog, Thanks for Asking.

    Our theme is Girl Tones' Can't Pause. Girl Tones is a 2-piece punk rock band based out of Western Kentucky. Check out their website girltones.com 

    For questions or topic suggestions, you can email us at crisisintervention@hopeharbor.net

    You can call us 24/7 at 270.846.1100 for questions, resources, or someone to talk to.

    Thank you for hanging out with us!


    ---

    Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/still-not-asking/message

    • 37 min
    Pt. 1 Consent and the Bachelor

    Pt. 1 Consent and the Bachelor

    In this episode, Kellie McClure from Ampersand Sexual Violence Resource Center in Lexington, KY joins Mel G. and Alayna to discuss consent in reality TV, specifically the Bachelor and the Bachelorette. From contracts, to producers, to sex: what are they really able to consent to? Our conversation covers these themes and mentions of sexual assault and harassment on the shows. Mel G. and Kellie are well-versed in Bachelor Nation, but our conversation explains details for those who may not have ever watched an episode (like Alayna). Consent, or lack there of, is everywhere in our culture. Check back for part two! 

    *We are asking for voice message submissions through Anchor for a future episode about virginity, purity myth, and the pressures/shame we feel around sex, specifically sex for the first time. Your submission will be kept anonymous and you will be notified if your submission is used in the episode.

    This podcast is brought to you by Hope Harbor, A Sexual Trauma Recovery Center where we provide free, confidential services to anyone impacted by sexual violence in south central Kentucky. For more information on services and ways to get involved, check out our website hopeharbor.net where you can also find our blog, Thanks for Asking.

    Our theme is Girl Tones' Can't Pause. Girl Tones is a 2-piece punk rock band based out of Western Kentucky. Check out their website girltones.com 

    For questions or topic suggestions, you can email us at crisisintervention@hopeharbor.net

    You can call us 24/7 at 270.846.1100 for questions, resources, or someone to talk to.

    Thank you for hanging out with us!


    ---

    Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/still-not-asking/message

    • 49 min
    Cancel Culture

    Cancel Culture

    Content warning: sexual assault, sexual harassment, transphobia, child abuse, physical violence

    In this episode, Mel and Alayna are joined by Hope Harbor volunteers, Ebony and Colin, to discuss cancel culture. We discuss Bill Cosby, Kobe Bryant, R. Kelly, J.K. Rowling, Shia LaBeouf, Antonio Brown, Justin Timberlake, Jason Moma, James Franco, and a few others. We discuss cancel culture in relation to sexual assault and harassment accusations and convictions as well as other forms of violence and exploitation. This episode was recorded before Bill Cosby’s conviction was overturned and he was released from prison. We loved having these two on the show and we hope you enjoy it and get some laughs and knowledge out of it. 

    Article from WBUR Boston referenced by Colin

    *We are asking for voice message submissions through Anchor for a future episode about virginity, purity myth, and the pressures/shame we feel around sex, specifically sex for the first time. Your submission will be kept anonymous and you will be notified if your submission is used in the episode.

    This podcast is brought to you by Hope Harbor, A Sexual Trauma Recovery Center where we provide free, confidential services to anyone impacted by sexual violence in south central Kentucky. For more information on services and ways to get involved, check out our website hopeharbor.net where you can also find our blog, Thanks for Asking.

    Our theme is Girl Tones' Can't Pause. Girl Tones is a 2-piece punk rock band based out of Western Kentucky. Check out their website girltones.com 

    For questions or topic suggestions, you can email us at crisisintervention@hopeharbor.net

    You can call us 24/7 at 270.846.1100 for questions, resources, or someone to talk to.

    Thank you for hanging out with us!


    ---

    Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/still-not-asking/message

    • 1 hr 26 min
    What is Birth Trauma? with Mary Duke LCCE

    What is Birth Trauma? with Mary Duke LCCE

    Content warning: sexual assault, birth trauma, obstetric violence, episiotomies, birth rape

    Mary Duke is a doula, Lamaze certified birth educator, and advocate for making the best choice for you and your family before, during, and after birth. Mel and Alayna have been longtime followers of Mary Duke and were so excited when she reached out to come on an episode. We are all comfortable talking about what is uncomfortable and in this episode we discuss the culture around birth and parenting, the medicalization of birth, and the choices we have in the process. We also acknowledge and celebrate that all genders can be pregnant, give birth, and parent. You can and should follow Mary Duke at My Sunshine Birth Services- Mary Duke LCCE on Facebook, @mysunshinebirth on Instagram and TikTok. Her website is mysunshinebirth.com Like SNAFI, Mary Duke has a following in Australia! 

    Some resources mentioned by Mary Duke: Birth Monopoly (birthmonopoly.com) and Mandy Birth Nurse (mandyirby.com)

    *We are asking for voice message submissions through Anchor for a future episode about virginity, purity myth, and the pressures/shame we feel around sex, specifically sex for the first time. Your submission will be kept anonymous and you will be notified if your submission is used in the episode.

    This podcast is brought to you by Hope Harbor, A Sexual Trauma Recovery Center where we provide free, confidential services to anyone impacted by sexual violence in south central Kentucky. For more information on services and ways to get involved, check out our website hopeharbor.net where you can also find our blog, Thanks for Asking.

    Our theme is Girl Tones' Can't Pause. Girl Tones is a 2-piece punk rock band based out of Western Kentucky. Check out their website girltones.com 

    For questions or topic suggestions, you can email us at crisisintervention@hopeharbor.net

    You can call us 24/7 at 270.846.1100 for questions, resources, or someone to talk to.

    Thank you for hanging out with us!


    ---

    Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/still-not-asking/message

    • 56 min
    Pt. 2 How Will We Heal Ourselves? with Dr. Cre Dye

    Pt. 2 How Will We Heal Ourselves? with Dr. Cre Dye

    "When we do work within, we heal around." -Cre Dye

    This episode is part two of a conversation Alayna and Mel had with Dr. Cre Dye. We were able to discuss shame, especially shame surrounding sex. This episode picks up where Alayna left off after using the term "non-men" to refer to experiences of women, nonbinary and trans people. Content warning: there is discussion of signs of child abuse in reference to child masturbation. We highly recommend finding Cre and all the amazing things she has going on on Facebook at Cre Dye Yoga & Healing and Instagram at @credyeyoga 

    *We are asking for voice message submissions through Anchor for a future episode about virginity, purity myth, and the pressures/shame we feel around sex, specifically sex for the first time. Your submission will be kept anonymous and you will be notified if your submission is used in the episode. 

    This podcast is brought to you by Hope Harbor, A Sexual Trauma Recovery Center where we provide free, confidential services to anyone impacted by sexual violence in south central Kentucky. For more information on services and ways to get involved, check out our website hopeharbor.net where you can also find our blog, Thanks for Asking.

    Our theme is Girl Tones' Can't Pause. Girl Tones is a 2-piece punk rock band based out of Western Kentucky. Check out their website girltones.com 

    For questions or topic suggestions, you can email us at crisisintervention@hopeharbor.net

    You can call us 24/7 at 270.846.1100 for questions, resources, or someone to talk to.

    Thank you for hanging out with us!


    ---

    Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/still-not-asking/message

    • 41 min

Customer Reviews

4.6 out of 5
8 Ratings

8 Ratings

jellyclaire ,

Thought provoking

Just listen to the first episode - really good stuff. Harrowing, relatable (unfortunately) and important.

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