#740: Greg McKeown and Diana Chapman

This episode is a two-for-one, and that’s because the podcast recently hit its 10-year anniversary and passed one billion downloads. To celebrate, I’ve curated some of the best of the best—some of my favorites—from more than 700 episodes over the last decade. I could not be more excited. The episode features segments from episode #355 "Greg McKeown — How to Master Essentialism" and episode #536 "Diana Chapman — How to Get Unstuck, Do “The Work,” Take Radical Responsibility, and Reduce Drama in Your Life."

Please enjoy!

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Timestamps:

[00:00] Start

[05:26] Notes about this supercombo format.

[06:28] Enter Greg McKeown.

[06:49] What is non-essential?

[07:46] Overcoming the planning fallacy.

[13:30] The problem with taking ownership of someone else’s problems.

[15:44] How to avoid committing to the unsustainable.

[21:26] Three rules.

[25:28] The personal quarterly offsite.

[33:05] Enter Diana Chapman.

[33:22] A transformative gift.

[36:56] The Drama Triangle.

[43:36] The whole-body yes (or no) and how it can serve us.

[46:06] Diana guides an experience to help pay better attention to our whole-body yes (or no).

[54:36] Observations made during the exercise and how Diana recommends using this inventory.

[1:01:39] Fostering playfulness for those who mute their desire to celebrate.

[1:08:28] Diana’s “black belt in practicing candor.”

[1:09:37] Diana’s thoughts on loving pressure and how to bring it into a relationship.

[1:13:24] Applying loving pressure to people you don’t know well.

[1:15:08] Diana’s guidance on introspection leading to perspective shifts; using Byron Katie’s “turnarounds.”

[1:17:48] Diana guides me through a turnaround.

[1:23:58] A turnaround’s purpose is to identify and embrace alternatives, not invalidate the inspected belief.

[1:29:06] The importance of introducing the somatic into the process; suggestions for difficulty with this step.

[1:31:47] The role of the witness in this process.

[1:33:54] Walking the line.

[1:35:40] Welcoming the opportunity to learn from the experience, even if it’s not preferred.

[1:37:35] Alternative tools for dysregulation in the moment.

[1:39:31] Risks Diana and her husband Matt took to keep their relationship vital; who initiated the first difficult conversation.

[1:45:11] How Diana figured out who she needed to be during this time.

[1:47:11] Navigating decision points together as a couple.

[1:49:42] Examples of commitments from The 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership.

[1:53:22] The Mind Jogger app and how Diana uses it with the commitments.

[1:55:55] Assessing self-awareness in hiring interviews applied to non-job situations.

[1:57:53] Books most gifted.

[1:59:35] Parting thoughts.

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