The Better Man Podcast Dean Pohlman

I used to think that the keys to great health were eating right, exercising often, and getting enough sleep. While these are good for your health, they pale in comparison to the quality of your relationships. 
In fact, a Harvard study proved that your relationships are the #1 most important factor for your overall health and wellbeing. 
But many guys, myself included, can be terrible at their most important relationship: The one you and your partner share. 
I get it, relationships are hard. But men have a tendency to commit fatal mistakes in their relationships—and most of these mistakes fly under our radar. 
That’s the bad news. 
The good news?
Not only is improving your relationship possible, but nobody understands how to improve your relationship better than today’s guest, Jayson Gaddis, author and founder of The Relationship School. 
Jayson had broken relationships his entire life because of his childhood conditioning. After doing the work and addressing the root cause (which was himself), he’s not only discovered how to improve his relationship, but he’s coached thousands of couples (and saved countless marriages) with his teachings. 
If you aren’t completely satisfied with your relationship, this episode will show you the way. 
And you know what? 
It just might help you and your partner live 10 years longer… 
In this episode, Jayson reveals: 
How men unknowingly play the victim in relationships  How to have a healthier relationship with conflict  And how you can have better relationships (even if your relationship is less than perfect now)  As so much more, including… 
The single biggest reason men tend to mess up in relationships (7:44)  Why becoming more comfortable with your feelings allows you to hold space for your partner’s feelings (12:20)  How you subconsciously attract the perfect person to trigger your unresolved childhood emotions that can tear a healthy relationship apart (18:41)  The “Wisdom of Shame” secret for reframing shame into realistic goals (20:41)  2 questions to ask yourself every day to eliminate shame (27:27)  3 fundamental traits couples need to have for a successful, long-term relationship (32:32)  Why the “Outside In” approach to conflict in relationships is the #1 killer of relationships (and how to use the “Inside Out” method to enhance your relationship instead) (33:39)  The most important factor for success of a long-term relationship (and how to share this with your partner without triggering them) (36:21)  The only 2 choices you have around potential conflict in relationships (and how one leads to a great marriage while the other ruins it) (38:52)  The “impact me” formula for bringing up relationship problems in the healthiest and most effective way (46:25) How to better solve the wicked “fight below the fight” where men make conflict worse (55:47)  Couples that know how to handle conflict live 10 years longer than couples who don’t. Here’s how to get better at conflict… (58:25) Why what you fight about doesn’t matter as much as how you fight (and how to argue in a more productive way) (1:06:21)  The “LUFU” skill required to handle conflict in a healthier way (1:09:25)  How leading with mini disclaimers before bringing up sensitive topics puts you and your partner on the same team (1:16:46)  Listen now!
Resources mentioned on this episode: 
1. Subscribe to Jayson’s YouTube channel: If you want to improve your marriage, especially as a parent, Jayson puts out great content for free on YouTube here: https://www.youtube.com/@JaysonGaddis 
2. Join Jayson’s Relationship School: Nobody taught you how to be good at relationships… Until now. If you’re serious about improving your relationships, check out Jayson’s Relationship School here: https://relationshipschool.com/ 
3. Buy Jayson’s Book, Getting To Zero: How to Work Through Conflict in Your High-Stakes Relationships: If you

Most guys who are interested in self-care and self-improvement struggle heavily with it. Flicking on the TV or loading your favorite social media for doom scrolling is so much easier. Especially when you lead a busy life and are responsible for your family. 
And you know what? 
I struggle with this too. It’s a daily battle to pick the activity that’s rewarding in the long-term instead of the one that’s numbing in the short-term. 
But it’s possible to make the right choice even when you’re exhausted and your willpower is empty. In fact, I just went through this exact process last week. After a long, stress-filled morning, I plopped down on my couch after putting my daughter down for a nap, and flicked on the TV. 
But then a voice inside my head challenged me to use my time wisely. And in this episode, I share exactly what I did to flick off the TV and work on myself instead. 
In this episode, you’ll discover: 
Why it’s such a struggle to prioritize self-care (and strategies to make it easier) 
A prose I wrote called “Choosing Self-Care” that gives you a sneak peek into my brain—and reveals how I flicked off the TV (try this next time you want to veg out) 
How to make time in your schedule for the activities that truly matter 
Some other highlights include: 
One question to ask yourself when you’re low on willpower to hijack your brain for self-care (2:07) 
The insidious “mentally buzzed” trap you fall into each time you flick on your TV or open a social media app (3:29) 
How to choose what’s rewarding instead of what’s numbing (4:57) 
Why your environment is a better predictor of the success of your goals than motivation, willpower, or discipline (8:36) 
Listen now!
Resources mentioned on this episode: 
1. Be The Better You Retreat: The next Be The Better You Retreat happens this weekend in Austin, TX. While I haven’t scheduled the next one yet, I will do another one later in 2024. Subscribe to our emails to stay in the loop if you’d like to come. 
2. Man Flow Yoga Engage Beta: I kicked off the beta for Man Flow Yoga Engage recently—and we’re ironing out all the kinks to make it even more impactful for men looking for more from their life. The next cohort opens in July, so keep an eye out if you’re interested in joining. 
Other important links: 
Want to improve your sexual wellness, get stronger erections, and last longer in bed? Then join the FREE 7-Day Sexual Wellness Challenge here: https://shrtlnk.co/uA27H 
Want to unlock more flexibility and strength, reduce your risk of injury, and feel your absolute best over the next 7 days? Then join the FREE 7-Day Beginner’s Yoga for Men Challenge here: https://shrtlnk.co/pTVc7 
Tired of doing a form of yoga that causes more injuries than it helps prevent? The cold, hard truth is men need yoga specifically designed for them. Well, here's some good news: You can start your 7-day free trial to Man Flow Yoga by visiting https://shrtlnk.co/kP8M7 
 

Here’s an uncomfortable truth: 
You will get injured at some point on your fitness journey. While we can do our best to prevent injuries, injuries are unavoidable. But just because you’ve injured yourself doesn’t mean you have to be sedentary for months. In fact, after listening to this episode, you might be able to cut your recovery time in half. 
Here’s why:
The science behind pain and recovery reminds me of the science behind nutrition. For years, we’ve been told outdated advice on nutrition, and the proper protocols are just becoming popular. 
Well the same is true for pain and injuries. For years, we’ve been told to use the RICE method—and are only recently discovering how ineffective this protocol is.
That’s why I invited Garrett Salpeter (aka The Health Engineer) on today’s show to give you an updated understanding into the science behind pain and recovery. Garrett’s background in engineering and neuroscience has helped him create NeuFit and his patented NEUBIE device, which helps you recover in half the time as normal. 
How was Garrett able to create tools to actually speed up recovery? Well, his big insight into pain and recovery is how much of it stems from your brain and nervous system, not just the injury itself. 
When you can tweak this “software” side of your injury, your body doesn’t get in the way of the healing process. And you recover faster. Regardless of your age, injury, or fitness level. 
Garrett will challenge many of your beliefs about pain, chronic pain, and injuries in the episode. And if you’re currently dealing with chronic pain, I can think of no better way to spend your time than by tuning into this interview. 
Here’s a sneak peek into what Garrett and I discuss: 
The science behind pain and recovery (including chronic pain) How to speed up your recovery by weeks (or even months)  The differences between the hardware and software of an injury (and which one prolongs your recovery)  5 most common triggers of chronic pain (and strategies to ease and eliminate chronic pain)  And so much more! 
Highlights from this show include: 
How Garrett recovered from a 3-month injury in just 3 weeks (5:24)  The weird neurological response to injury that slows down your recovery (5:40)  The scientific reason why movement, not rest, fast tracks your recovery (10:48)  How your brain can create pain out of thin air (and how to prevent it from hijacking your fitness routine) (20:52)  Why worrying about injuring yourself when working out actually increases your risk of injury (30:11)  How your body gets in the way of its own healing process (36:56)  Why focusing on the “software” of your injury instead of just the hardware can speed up the healing process by weeks or even months (38:17)  The “Motion is Lotion” mindset shift that helps you recover from pain and injuries faster than anyone else your age (42:25)  The top 3 activities you can do outside of physical therapy to boost your recovery and curb your pain (57:47)  How to better tell the difference between common soreness and full-blown pain (1:01:59)  Can muscle cramps make you stronger? Here’s what the science says… (1:09:22)  How joint mobility exercises can calm chronic pain and even eliminate it (1:17:35)  5 most common triggers of chronic pain (and why it isn’t always physical) (1:20:09)  Why Mike Tyson credits Garrett’s “NEUBIE” machine for him being able to fight Roy Jones Jr. at age 54 (1:39:11)  Listen now!
Resources mentioned on this episode: 
1. NeuFit: If you want to speed up the healing process, there’s no better way than by checking out NeuFit. Garrett has trained thousands of personal trainers and doctors across the world into his modality. Learn more about NeuFit here: ​https://www.neu.fit/ 
2. Buy Garrett’s Book: If you want a deeper dive into the NeuFit modality, I also recommend reading Garrett’s book, “The NeuFit Method: Unleash the P

For whatever reason, men are particularly bad at managing their stress, anxiety, and overwhelm. I’ve struggled with this myself. Everyone struggles with this. 
But why? 
As men, we’ve been discouraged to give our emotions the validation they deserve. Instead of confronting issues, we avoid them by turning into workalcoholics or exercise junkies. While these can be beneficial activities, they cause your emotions to bubble behind the scenes… Until you unleash them at the worst possible times. 
But there’s a better way to manage uncomfortable feelings like stress, anxiety, and overwhelm, so you actually overcome them.
In this episode, you’ll discover: 
Why avoiding your emotions is a bigger problem than you think 2 prerequisites you must have in order to confront and address discomforting emotions  3 simple, yet wildly effective strategies to address and conquer stress, anxiety, and overwhelm  And more, including… 
Why “pushing through” stress like you would a tough workout makes it fester under the surface until you explode (even if it works in the short-term) (1:18)  How men use exercise as a crutch to avoid uncomfortable emotions (and how to use your endorphins as a tool instead) (4:23)  Do your thoughts keep running around in a circle like a dog trying to catch its tail? Here’s how to break free of this endless worry loop (10:41)  How physically writing down your worries “deletes” them from your headspace (11:32)  Listen now!
Other important links: 
Want to improve your sexual wellness, get stronger erections, and last longer in bed? Then join the FREE 7-Day Sexual Wellness Challenge here: https://shrtlnk.co/uA27H 
Want to unlock more flexibility and strength, reduce your risk of injury, and feel your absolute best over the next 7 days? Then join the FREE 7-Day Beginner’s Yoga for Men Challenge here: https://shrtlnk.co/pTVc7 
Tired of doing a form of yoga that causes more injuries than it helps prevent? The cold, hard truth is men need yoga specifically designed for them. Well, here's some good news: You can start your 7-day free trial to Man Flow Yoga by visiting https://shrtlnk.co/kP8M7

Something devastating happened to you when you turned seven years old…
You figured out your default state of being and thinking and trapped yourself in a “mind matrix.” Inside this “mind matrix,” your ego formed, your defense mechanisms solidified, and you started living the rest of our lives on autopilot. 
This happens to everyone, not just you… 
But the problem is, relying on defense mechanisms you formed when you were a child makes it easy to self-sabotage in adulthood. 
To make matters worse… Most men stay trapped in these childhood behavior patterns because they’ve repressed them for so long they don’t even realize their impact—until gut-wrenching pain shocks your system and allows you to see the matrix. 
That’s why I invited Ani Manian (aka The Mind Whisperer) onto today’s show. 
Ani went through this matrix-shattering experience when his dad’s body got cremated. And since then, he’s discovered how to help other men go through these transformative experiences without the soul-crushing pain. 
In today’s show, Ani reveals:
How shame works into your subconscious and holds you back  Why coping strategies you created as a child still control you today (and how making peace with these parts allows you to move forward)  How to actually love yourself (and why men find self-love impossible)  How to reach your true, limitless potential—no matter how many obstacles you encounter And so much more, including these highlights… 
How to tap into the limitless potential sitting idly inside you (4:56)  The weird reason why newborn babies have more control and contact with their emotions than full-grown men (9:18)  The main reason why adults struggle with being present (and how to improve this skill) (11:55)  How your nervous system creates a “Shell Identity” of yourself in early childhood that still limits you to this day (13:58)  Why gut-wrenching emotional pain helps you see the “Ego Matrix” your trapped in (15:32)  The “Check Engine Light” secret for using your suffering to reach your highest potential (22:23)  Why you can trace back every self-sabotaging behavior in adulthood back to a childhood hero (30:02)  The fundamental mistake people make on their self-growth journey that prevents them from escaping their programming (31:27)  The “Shame Core” that you store deep inside yourself that makes transformative change impossible (44:47)  Why deep friendships with other men is the most effective way to break free of self-defeating patterns (51:07)  Do you struggle with loving yourself? This is the most practical and useful way to practice self-love (1:05:29) Resources mentioned on this episode: 
1. Scale with Psychology Podcast: If you’d like to learn more about Ani and his version of self-improvement, check out his podcast, Scale with Psychology, wherever you listen to podcasts. 
2. Ani’s website: If you’re a high-level entrepreneur who wants more out of life, check out Ani’s website here: https://animanian.com/ 
3. Follow Ani on Instagram: Want to stay up-to-date with The Mind Whisperer? Follow Ani on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/ani.manian/ 
Other important links: 
Want to improve your sexual wellness, get stronger erections, and last longer in bed? Then join the FREE 7-Day Sexual Wellness Challenge here: https://shrtlnk.co/uA27H 
Want to unlock more flexibility and strength, reduce your risk of injury, and feel your absolute best over the next 7 days? Then join the FREE 7-Day Beginner’s Yoga for Men Challenge here: https://shrtlnk.co/pTVc7 
Tired of doing a form of yoga that causes more injuries than it helps prevent? The cold, hard truth is men need yoga specifically designed for them. Well, here's some good news: You can start your 7-day free trial to Man Flow Yoga by visiting https://shrtlnk.co/kP8M7

There are a lot of men in the Man Flow Yoga Community who either want more or need more from their subscription. Whether you struggle with motivation, consistency, your relationships, or too much stress, I have good news for you:
Man Flow Yoga Engage will help you overcome these struggles (even if they’re not purely physical struggles). 
I haven’t launched something as big as Man Flow Yoga Engage since I first launched the Member’s Area. 
And in this episode, I explain… 
What Man Flow Yoga Engage is  Who Man Flow Yoga Engage is for  Why you might want to join Man Flow Yoga Engage  How Man Flow Yoga Engage differs from the Member’s Area  And how you can join the beta launch for Man Flow Yoga Engage (and secure a fat discount)  If you’re curious about Man Flow Yoga Engage at all, listen now. 
Highlights from this episode include: 
What exactly is Man Flow Yoga Engage and how does it differ from the Member’s Area? (2:15)  The “Targeted Wellness Sessions” included in Man Flow Yoga Engage that fast tracks your unique fitness goals (4:59)  How Man Flow Yoga Engage addresses the single biggest problem affecting modern men today (11:05) Have a question about Man Flow Yoga Engage? Here are my answers to the most frequently asked questions I’ve received (14:12)  Who is Man Flow Yoga Engage for? Here are the two types of people I’ve designed this for… (18:20)  Resources mentioned on this episode: 
1. Man Flow Yoga Engage: If you’re interested in the beta launch of Man Flow Yoga Engage, you must sign up by March 24, 2024. Learn more and enroll here: https://manflowyoga.com/mfy2402/ 
Other important links: 
Want to improve your sexual wellness, get stronger erections, and last longer in bed? Then join the FREE 7-Day Sexual Wellness Challenge here: https://shrtlnk.co/uA27H 
Want to unlock more flexibility and strength, reduce your risk of injury, and feel your absolute best over the next 7 days? Then join the FREE 7-Day Beginner’s Yoga for Men Challenge here: https://shrtlnk.co/pTVc7 
Tired of doing a form of yoga that causes more injuries than it helps prevent? The cold, hard truth is men need yoga specifically designed for them. Well, here's some good news: You can start your 7-day free trial to Man Flow Yoga by visiting https://shrtlnk.co/kP8M7