"Modern Relationships"

Erik Torenberg, Turpentine
"Modern Relationships"

We rarely get to hear how people actually make relationships work, especially in the high-pressure, fast-paced world of tech. While there's endless dating advice out there, what's missing are the real, unfiltered stories of how ambitious people navigate modern relationships and build a life together. Unlike every other aspect of modern life that can be solved with an app or outsourced to a service, building meaningful relationships remains stubbornly resistant to quick fixes. Through conversations with leading relationship thinkers and candid interviews with real couples, we dig into the raw truth of what it takes to make partnerships work - from the challenges and fights to the breakthroughs and lessons learned along the way.  I believe we learn best from seeing how others have navigated similar paths. These conversations offer honest perspectives on what it really takes to make modern relationships work in our corner of the world. Hosted by Erik Torenberg, investor and entrepreneur. Modern Relationships is part of the Turpentine podcast network.

Episodes

  1. Kristen Berman and Phil Levin

    5 DAYS AGO

    Kristen Berman and Phil Levin

    In this week's episode, Phil Levin and Kristen Berman share the ultimate friend zone to romance success story. What started with running quirky social experiments together (like turning a bar into a controlled study on meeting people) blossomed into a relationship that defies convention. Now this behavioral scientist and founder (Live Near Friends) runs a "friend compound" in Oakland, applies data to life's biggest decisions, and proves that sometimes the best relationships start knowing it "would be too good." Kristen and Phil share how they've built an unconventional but deeply fulfilling life together. Instead of trying to change each other, they focus on designing their environment for success. Modern Relationships is a podcast from Turpentine. Learn more: www.turpentine.co -- 🙏 Help shape our show by taking our quick listener survey at https://bit.ly/TurpentinePulse -- Follow on X: Kristen - @bermster Phil - @levin_phil Erik - @eriktorenberg Turpentine - @turpentinemedia -- Links: Kristen: https://irrationallabs.com/ Phil: https://livenearfriends.com/ Erik's substack: https://eriktorenberg.substack.com/ -- Timestamps: (00:00) Intro (01:34) Relationship Differences & Learnings (01:53) Partner Selection: Starting as Friends (03:52) Navigating Attraction and Friendships (05:30) Initial Connection and the "Mental Band" (06:26) Key Lessons on Partner Selection (09:16) Core Personality Traits and Acceptance (10:04) Shared Values and Co-Living Vision (14:16) Co-Living and Community Life (18:28) Tradeoffs of Community Living (19:13) Converting Friends & Attraction (20:54) Chemistry and Early Relationship Stages (21:44) Fighting and Disagreements (24:28) Managing Conflict (25:11) The Importance of a Good Partner (26:53) Decisions Around Having Children (30:07) Stress and Decision-Making Structures (31:55) Careers as a Couple & Childcare (38:39) Unique Fights & Rituals for Forgiveness (40:46) Lessons from Dan Ariely (42:45) Behavior Change and Life Design (49:25) "Thieves" Friendship Hack (50:23) Vision for the Future (56:12) Career Priorities (57:53) Taboo Topics and Memorable Conversations (1:00:00) Baby Number Two (1:00:39) Wrap

    1h 1m
  2. Delian Asparouhov and Nadia Asparouhov

    2024-12-26

    Delian Asparouhov and Nadia Asparouhov

    We rarely get to hear how high-powered tech couples actually make relationships work. In this remarkably candid conversation, Delian Asparouhov (Founders Fund partner and Co-Founder of Varda Space Industries) and author Nadia Asparouhov pull back the curtain on their unique approach to love and commitment. From their memorable first date featuring frantically-eaten burrata to building a space company while starting a family, they share how they've figured out what really matters - and why sometimes the best relationship advice is to talk less, not more. Together with Erik Torenberg, they dig into everything from their unconventional take on conflict resolution to what it's actually like balancing a growing family with ambitious work in tech. Modern Relationships is a podcast from Turpentine. Learn more: www.turpentine.co -- 🙏 Help shape our show by taking our quick listener survey at https://bit.ly/TurpentinePulse -- Follow on X: Nadia - @nayafia Delian - @zebulgar Erik - @eriktorenberg Turpentine Podcasts - @turpentinemedia -- Links: Nadia's writing: https://nadia.xyz/ Delian's site: https://delian.io/ Erik's substack: https://eriktorenberg.substack.com/ -- Timestamps: (00:00) Preview and Intro (00:46) Origin of Modern Relationships (01:48) "Make marriages great again" (02:59) Fighting about the Eight Sleep mattress (06:27) Handling unvoiced feelings (10:05) Prison metaphor (10:47) Early stages of the relationship (14:03) First date and first impressions (15:58) The burrata incident (20:54) Ranking relationship priorities (22:59) Finding the sweet spot in a relationship (27:10) Communication and commitment (32:46) Parenthood drudgery (37:09) Debating young parenthood (42:37) Having children (49:32) Building 'an aristocracy' (54:20) Balancing identity and motherhood (56:05) Growing together through changes (58:11) Tough guy cries at space movies (58:41) Wrap

    1 hr

About

We rarely get to hear how people actually make relationships work, especially in the high-pressure, fast-paced world of tech. While there's endless dating advice out there, what's missing are the real, unfiltered stories of how ambitious people navigate modern relationships and build a life together. Unlike every other aspect of modern life that can be solved with an app or outsourced to a service, building meaningful relationships remains stubbornly resistant to quick fixes. Through conversations with leading relationship thinkers and candid interviews with real couples, we dig into the raw truth of what it takes to make partnerships work - from the challenges and fights to the breakthroughs and lessons learned along the way.  I believe we learn best from seeing how others have navigated similar paths. These conversations offer honest perspectives on what it really takes to make modern relationships work in our corner of the world. Hosted by Erik Torenberg, investor and entrepreneur. Modern Relationships is part of the Turpentine podcast network.

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