Spicy Fat Women in Media Network
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- Society & Culture
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Spicy Fat is a new podcast hosted by Psychotherapist, Sexologist, best-selling author, and international speaker, Carlen Costa. A recent weight-loss surgery reversal uncovered her late-diagnosed ADHD and sent her on a journey of radical self-love. This sparked Carlen’s mission; to help other women entering their 40s better understand their bodies, brains, and hearts. With new episodes every other Thursday, Carlen will cover a variety of topics including mental health, relationships, body image, and alternative medicine.
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WTF is 'the Authentic Self' Anyway?
Have you ever been sold a course or experience that promises to connect you to your authentic self? In this episode, Carlen reflects on the grifting culture that can often convince you that you aren’t good enough and need to be more authentic. She discusses the concept of "finding one's authentic self." While exploring her own journey, she reflects about authenticity in society; it is not just about when we feel happy or powerful. She concludes that when it's implied that people aren’t authentic in their everyday lives, it can negatively impact our mental health. Carlen explores some common themes that seem to be recurring in recent sessions within her psychotherapy practice. Carlen challenges the idea that authenticity is something to be sought after, emphasizing that we are already authentic in our responses and experiences. She encourages listeners to embrace all aspects of themselves and make choices that align with who they are. Carlen leaves listeners with a few exercises for embracing your already authentic self.
Takeaways
Authenticity is not something to be sought after; we are already authentic in our responses and experiences.
Embrace all aspects of yourself, including the uncomfortable and vulnerable parts.
Make choices that align with who you are and what you truly want.
Normalize discomfort and make room for the tough stuff in relationships and personal growth.
Practice self-compassion and acceptance in times of uncertainty.
In this episode, Carlen mentions her book: https://www.carlencosta.com/thelovebook -
The Birds Papaya: Joy Lives in the Body
Sarah Nicole Landry, also known as The Bird’s Papaya, joins the Spicy Fat Podcast to discuss her journey through body image, motherhood and radical self-love. She discusses her perspective on sharing personal moments of her life on social media and creating a space for followers to connect and find inspiration. The conversation explores authenticity on social media, the impact of negativity, and the importance of empathy and humanity when we interact online.
Carlen and Sarah also discuss finding joy within yourself and the process of reinvention. Sarah speaks about both the challenges and rewards of being an influencer and entrepreneur, and her experiences with the right partners in designing clothing collections.
Sarah Nicole Landry aka @TheBirdsPapaya is a divorced and remarried mom of four (babies to teens) who loves cultivating powerful social media conversations around life and our experiences in it. Sarah is a body confidence advocate, speaker, writer, 6x cover girl and weekly podcast host. Recent notable career achievements include the 2020 Iris Awards “Instagrammer of the Year”, as well as one of Today’s Parent’s “Most Influential Parents”. Her lifestyle includes approximately 22,000 unanswered emails, 14 empty cups in her car, and peanut butter straight from the jar. She wrote this bio about herself.
As Sarah says on her website: I am a body confidence advocate, speaker, writer, occasional model, and weekly podcast host and an ongoing student of life. If you like what you see, I hope you’ll grab a snack, sit down and stay a while.
Topics:
Authenticity and Inspiration on Social Media
Navigating the Real and Curated Aspects of Social Media
Setting Boundaries and Dealing with Negativity
The Importance of Empathy and Humanity in Online Interactions
The Bravery and Vulnerability of Sharing on Social Media
Navigating Criticism and Gossip in the Online World
The Power of Community and Connection
Embracing Joy and Living Authentically
The Journey of an Influencer and Entrepreneur
Investing in Yourself and Your Dreams
Navigating Fear and Imposter Syndrome
Find out more about Sarah Nicole Landry: https://thebirdspapaya.com/
Listen to her podcast: https://thebirdspapaya.com/the-papaya-podcast/ -
I Hate Being a Statistic
Disclaimer: In this episode, Carlen will discuss sexual assault and violence. Host Carlen Costa shares her personal experience of sexual assault and discusses the many impacts it can have on victims. She provides statistics, definitions, and examples of different types of sexual assault while providing support for both survivors and their friends and family. She also highlights the need for systemic change and encourages listeners to take action and support organizations that help survivors.
Takeaways for victims:
Your safety is important. Are you in a safe place? If you’re not feeling safe, consider reaching out to someone you trust for support. You don’t have to go through this alone.
What happened was not your fault. Something happened to you that you didn’t want to happen—and that’s not OK.
Call someone you love. Anyone. It is not in your best interest to be alone or carry this alone.
Consider receiving medical attention if needed, including heading to a hospital emergency room.
Consider reporting options. Justice can mean different things to different people, and reporting a crime to law enforcement is an individual decision.
If you’re a friend/family member of someone who has recently experienced this type of assault, some affirmative things you can say are: “I believe you. / It took a lot of courage to tell me about this.” It can be extremely difficult for survivors to come forward and share their story. They may feel ashamed, concerned that they won’t be believed, or worried they’ll be blamed. Leave any “why” questions or investigations to the experts—your job is to support this person.
“It’s not your fault. / You didn’t do anything to deserve this.” Survivors may blame themselves, especially if they know the perpetrator personally. Remind the survivor, maybe even more than once, that they are not to blame.
“You are not alone. / I care about you and am here to listen or help in any way I can.” Let the survivor know that you are there for them and willing to listen to their story if they are comfortable sharing it.
For immediate assistance, please call one of the following 24-hour helplines:
Human Trafficking Helpline: 1-833-900-1010
Assaulted Women’s Helpline: 1-866-863-0511
Anova 24-Hour Crisis and Support Line: 519-642-3000
Resources:
https://canadianwomen.org/the-facts/sexual-assault-harassment/
https://sexualassaultsupport.ca/statistics-sexual-violence-in-canada/
https://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/scc-condom-use-case-decision-1.6535127
https://bcsth.ca/what-to-do-if-someone-has-shared-or-threatened-to-share-your-intimate-image/
https://www.justice.gc.ca/eng/rp-pr/cj-jp/victim/rr14_01/p10.html
https://www.gov.nl.ca/vpi/tips-and-tools/tips-to-help-a-friend-who-has-been-sexually-assaulted/
Find out more about Carlen Costa and her practice: https://www.carlencosta.com/
April is Sexual Assault Awareness month; a month of solidarity dedicated to sexual assault victims. It’s meant to raise awareness about the prevalence of sexual assault and violence while sharing information and resources to foster a great understanding of consent.
Some statistics from www.sexassault.ca:
1 in 4 women in North America will be sexually assaulted in their lifetime. For every 100 incidents in Canada, only 6 are reported to police. Over 80% of sex crime victims in Canada are women.
Resources in Canada for Family and Intimate Partner Violence
A note from the Women in Media Network: The WIMN is proud to support organizations that provide relief and guidance to women and girls who have been subjected to violence, trafficking, and/or homelessness. Proceeds from Women in Media Network launch merchandise will support the London Abused Women's Centre: https://www.womeninmedia.network/. Access the London Abused Women's Centre: https://www.lawc.on.ca/ -
Lessons from 97 Year Old Avo Luisa
This conversation is about aging and the experiences of women as they grow older. Host Carlen Costa reflects on her own aging process and the changes she has noticed in her body and mindset. She discusses societal pressures to remain youthful and the impact of media representation on aging women. The conversation also touches on the experiences of elderly individuals, including social isolation and the challenges they face. The host's 97-year-old grandmother, Avo Luisa, shares her own experiences growing up in Portugal and immigrating to Canada. Together, they cover topics like living without electricity, marriage, and the journey to Canada. Luisa shares her journey from Portugal to Canada, her experiences as a mother and grandmother, and her perspective on life. Luisa emphasizes the importance of kindness, taking care of others, and living in peace. She also talks about her health challenges and her passion for crocheting and helping those in need. Luisa's wisdom and positive outlook on life serve as an inspiration for future generations.
Topics:
Introduction to the Topic of Aging
Societal Pressures on Youthfulness
Media Representation of Aging Women
Challenges Faced by the Elderly
The Transformative Experience of Immigration
Cherishing Family and Creating Beautiful Memories
Finding Beauty in Kindness and Goodness
The Importance of Community and Consciousness
Pride in Family and the Way They Have Turned Out
Advice for Women: Be Kind, Take Care, and Avoid Hatred
Staying Strong through Hard Work and Kindness
Living in Peace and Avoiding Fights
Find out more about Carlen's work:
https://www.carlencosta.com/
https://www.spicyfat.com/ -
My ADHD Story
Carlen shares her personal journey of uncovering her ADHD diagnosis and reflects on how it was missed for so long. She discusses the impact of ADHD on her academic and personal life, as well as the role of social media in her discovery. Carlen sheds light on the diagnosis gap in women with ADHD and the need for a shift in the model of diagnosis. She also explores the effects of trauma and ADHD on hunger cues and shares her experiences with coffee and smoking. Carlen's desire to support women with ADHD is just beginning! She's excited to create tools, resources, and support for neurodivergent individuals in the near future; she'll keep you posted.
Takeaways
ADHD symptoms in women are often overlooked or misdiagnosed, leading to a diagnosis gap.
Trauma and ADHD can affect hunger cues and lead to disordered eating patterns.
Social media can play a positive role in self-discovery and connecting with others who have similar experiences.
Creating tools, resources, and support for neurodivergent individuals is crucial for their well-being and empowerment.
Chapters
(00:00) Introduction and Episode Purpose
03:20) Uncovering the Diagnosis of ADHD
06:10) Managing ADHD in School and Personal Life
07:30) ADHD in Women and the Influence of Social Media
10:43) The Diagnosis Gap in Women with ADHD
11:02) ADHD Symptoms and Coping Mechanisms
12:07) Discovering the Impact of Weight Loss Surgery
13:27) Practicing Embodiment Work and Feeling Fullness
15:24) The Effects of Trauma and ADHD on Hunger Cues
20:50) Finding Support and Connection with NeuroSpice Goblins
21:36) Exploring ADHD and Anger in Women
22:31) Creating Tools, Resources, and Support for NeuroSpice Goblins
23:14) Embracing Self-Worth and Deservingness
25:06) Closing Remarks and Call to Action
Find out more about Carlen's work:
https://www.carlencosta.com/
ADHD Resources
ADDitude Editors. “Famous People with ADHD.” ADDitude, 28 Nov. 2016, www.additudemag.com/slideshows/famous-people-with-adhd/.
“Is ADHD Hereditary or Genetic? Yes and No.” ADDitude, ADDitude, 15 Jan. 2009, www.additudemag.com/is-adhd-hereditary-yes-and-no/.
“Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).” The Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, www.camh.ca/en/health-info/mental-illness-and-addiction-index/attention-deficit-hyperactivity-disorder.
Chhabra, Sameer. “Adults Who Don’t Know They Have ADHD Can Struggle. Here’s How a Diagnosis Can Help.” CBC, 20 Jan. 2024, www.cbc.ca/radio/whitecoat/adults-undiagnosed-adhd-1.7087547.
Vear, Emily. “New Manulife Data Shows Spike in Adult ADHD Diagnosis | Manulife.” Www.manulife.ca, 21 Sept. 2023, www.manulife.ca/business/news/group-benefits-news/health-insights-press-release.html#:~:text=According%20to%20CADDRA%2C%20the%20Canadian. -
What is ADHD and Who Else Has It?
Disclaimer: Host Carlen Costa is a certified health care professional, but she is speaking about her personal experience and you should still consult a doctor or your own health care team while making decisions about your health. Find out more about today’s topics from the resources listed below.
In this episode, Carlen touches on her journey discovering her neurodivergence, and specifically ADHD. She explores the concept of hiding behind a ‘mask’ and hiding from your symptoms. She explains the concept of neurodiversity and neurotypicality, highlighting the differences in brain function. She also provides an overview of various neurodivergent conditions and their prevalence. She shares a list of famous people with ADHD, emphasizing that ADHD is not a disability but a different ability. She concludes by expressing pride in her journey of reclaiming her life and invites listeners to stay curious and embrace their own neurodiversity before part two on this topic, where she talks about her diagnosis while living in Toronto.
Takeaways
Neurodiversity is a framework for understanding different brain functions and the spectrum of mental challenges.
ADHD is a common neurodivergent condition that affects both children and adults.
Many famous individuals, such as Simone Biles and Emma Watson, have ADHD.
ADHD is not a disability but a different ability, and it is important to embrace and accommodate neurodivergent individuals
Chapters
(00:00) Introduction and the Mask of Fine
(03:28) Discovering Neuro Spiciness
(07:57) Neurodiversity and Neurotypicality
(10:19) Understanding Neurodivergence
(13:19) Neurodivergent Conditions
(14:04) ADHD Prevalence and Famous People with ADHD
(25:05) ADHD Awareness and Misconceptions
(26:02) ADHD as a Genetic Difference
(28:55) ADHD as a Different Ability
(29:43) Upcoming Episode and Conclusion
Works Cited:
ADDitude Editors. “Famous People with ADHD.” ADDitude, 28 Nov. 2016, www.additudemag.com/slideshows/famous-people-with-adhd/.
“Is ADHD Hereditary or Genetic? Yes and No.” ADDitude, ADDitude, 15 Jan. 2009, www.additudemag.com/is-adhd-hereditary-yes-and-no/.
“Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).” The Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, www.camh.ca/en/health-info/mental-illness-and-addiction-index/attention-deficit-hyperactivity-disorder.
Chhabra, Sameer. “Adults Who Don’t Know They Have ADHD Can Struggle. Here’s How a Diagnosis Can Help.” CBC, 20 Jan. 2024, www.cbc.ca/radio/whitecoat/adults-undiagnosed-adhd-1.7087547.
Vear, Emily. “New Manulife Data Shows Spike in Adult ADHD Diagnosis | Manulife.” Www.manulife.ca, 21 Sept. 2023, www.manulife.ca/business/news/group-benefits-news/health-insights-press-release.html#:~:text=According%20to%20CADDRA%2C%20the%20Canadian.
Customer Reviews
Spicy awesome!
My brain craves the new episodes. Thanks for sharing your skills!
A needed voice!
The world needs this, thank you!!!!
Goosebumps much!?!
This was powerful! Thank you for sharing! Thank you for being amazing!!! I already knew you were but this just proved it!
P.s. I was going to title this goosies galore but then wasn’t sure how to spell goosies and looked it up…urban dictionary definition… you might find it funny if you don’t already know what goosies are but you probably do 🤣anyways thru this process I learned something knew in more ways than one 😂 thank you! Looking forward to the next podcast!!!