Cats in the Cradle (Mennonite Edition)

You can’t be a parent and not be anxious. Of course you’re going to be anxious. Acting anxious is about you, not your child. Children will avoid their parents because the anxiety and worry is about the parent needing their child to be different. Children need their parents to be calm and provide a safe place to explore what is going on for them. However, so long as a parent is responding from an inner anxious state, the child feels that they are not heard or understood and will avoid being open with their parent. They will think, “My mother and father don’t understand what I’m up against and why I’m feeling so much pain that I have to numb myself to get through the day.

- Taken from the upcoming book Where Would You Like to Start: A master therapist on beginning psychotherapy with families by Dr. David Freeman and Avrum Nadigel