Psychotherapist/divorce expert Kate Scharff has worked with separating and divorcing families for 30 years. Both she and her co-host, psychotherapist Jane Prelinger, have been through divorce themselves- both as children and as adults. So they know, first-hand, that divorce is more painful and destabilizing, even, than most people imagine. In this podcast Kate and Jane offer compassionate, common-sense, practical and never-preachy advice on even the toughest divorce topics. Their message? Divorce (and parenting during divorce) is tough, and you're only human. But with the right blend of support, advice and hard work, you can learn to navigate it so that you (and your kids, if you have them) can move through this transition whole, happy, and ready to get on with the rest of your life.
Episode 26: Divorce, Mortgages and What to do with the House
If you're getting separated or divorced, where you'll each live is one of your biggest concerns. You have questions, like: "Can one of us keep the house?"; "Should one of us buy the other out?"; "How do we figure out what our house is worth?"; "Can I qualify for a mortgage, and what can I do to increase my chances?"; "What if I have been out of the job market for years?", and "If I don't keep the house, should I rent or buy?" Mortgage professional Margie Hofberg has over 15 years' experience helping separating and divorcing people to navigate this often anxiety-producing process. In this episode she shares helpful, reassuring, important and often surprising tips you need right now (before you sign your Separation or Divorce Agreement!) --to ensure that your transition from one household to two goes as smoothly as possible.
Episode 25- How to Protect Your Children in Divorce: Lessons from the Latest Research- with Dr. Lisa Herrick
What steps can you take to make sure your divorce doesn't cause permanent damage to your child's development? Psychologist and divorce expert Dr. Lisa Herrick joins us to discuss what we can learn from the latest research on the impact of divorce on children of all ages, including how to identify "risk factors" and implement "protective strategies" -- so that your divorce can remain a sad memory rather than a bad developmental turning point.
Episode 24 - Is Collaborative Divorce Right for You? Finding the Right Divorce for You Part 2:
Collabortive Divorce is an an out-of-court way to resolve your divorce disputes in a respectful, non-adversarial manner. Never heard of Collaborative Divorce? Heard of it, but want to know more? In this episode Kate and Jane are again joined by family law attorney Suzy Eckstein. Together they explain and demystify the important aspects of Collabortive Divorce-- what it is, how it works, and what makes it different from all other divorce process options. They address common questions and concerns, such as "What is the difference between Collaborative Divorce and mediation?", "How much does Collaborative Divorce cost?", "My spouse and I communicate pretty well, do we really need Collaborative Divorce?", "Is it true that if I end up having to go to court I'll lose my lawyer?", "What if my ex isn't the collaborative sort?", "What if I have a secret I don't want to disclose?", "What if I'm worried my spouse is hiding something?", "What if my spouse is abusing drugs?", "What if there is violence in our family?", and more.
Episode 23 - Finding the Right Divorce for You Part 1 - What are Your Options and How Do You Choose?
You've decided to get divorced (or your spouse has decided for you)... Where to begin? In this episode Kate and Jane are joined by experienced family law attorney Suzy Epstein. Together they take on the confusing questions "How can I find a good divorce lawyer who is right for me?", and "What are the the different ways to get divorced?" They then address other frequently asked questions, including "How much is this going to cost, and can I get my spouse to pay for it?, "How long is this going to take?", "How can I get my spouse to move out?", "What if my spouse takes me to court?", "Do we have to get attorneys?", "Can we make do with one attorney?", "What is the difference between mediation and Collaborative Divorce?"... and many more.
Episode 22 - Surviving the Holidays After a Divorce PT 2 - 10 Tips for Separating and Divorced Parents
If you're newly separated or divorced, the holidays can be tough. Especially if you have kids, you'll struggle with many questions, such as: "How can I surivive holiday time without my kids?", "How can I maintain or create new traditions on my own?", "How can I share kid time with my ex, and should we still celebrate some things "as a family?", "How will I cope with the loss of in-laws?", and "Will friends include me now that I'm on my own?" In this episode Kate and Jane share some of their own experiences navigating holidays (and other important "firsts") after their own divorces, and offer practical and emotional tips for doing well in this potential painful time.
Episode 21 - Surviving the Holidays After a Divorce PT 1: Tips for People Who Don't Have Kids and People Who Do
If you're newly separated or divorced, the holidays can be particularly tough- fraught with feelings of loss, loneliness, alienation and destabilization. It can seem that while everyone you know is having a magical family experience, you're struggling alone to find your place as an unpartnered person. In this episode Kate and Jane offer advice for navigating the holidays-- and other significant post-split "firsts"- while maintaining your sanity and beginning to design a new path forward.