Healing Through the Holidays (Part 1)

As Dr. Venus approaches the 1 year anniversary of her brother Tory’s transition on Christmas Eve, she is experiencing heavy feelings of grief, sadness, and deeply missing a loved one. She contends with the fact that the holidays can be brutal, especially when you have lost a loved one during a season of cheer. How do you put up holiday lights and deal with this festive time when it’s hard to even get out of bed some days? 

This week, she shares resources to deal with that grief, and ways to cope through the holiday season and beyond. If you are grieving this December, you are not alone, and you are seen and heard. 

Key Takeaways:

[3:35] Words often can’t communicate the feeling of grief when you have lost someone that you love. 

[4:19] Dr. Venus is experiencing her brother Tory’s first “angelversary”. He transitioned due to COVID complications last Christmas Eve, after 8 days of fighting the disease. Many families that lost loved ones during COVID also were not able to even see or touch their loved ones, making saying goodbye even more painful and heartbreaking. Tory was a great man and Dr. Venus honors his sense of humor and role as a protector and provider. 

[5:07] It’s hard enough to get out of bed when you are grieving, but how do you put up holiday lights and act cheerful during a festive time? First, know that you aren’t alone. Second, know there are different resources and many hotlines and providers that are there to provide support. 

[14:29] Next, tell the truth about how you feel, and take the space you need. Some days, Dr. Venus doesn’t try to get out of bed or dressed. Other days, she knows it’s important to take care of herself. If you have a pet or animal, spend time with them and take them for a walk. Try to create new memories, and plan for the future. 

[17:02] What ways can you nurture yourself? Can you learn a new skill? Finding even one thing to be grateful about per day can help, as well as moving your body and expressing your grief without words such as painting or dancing. 

Quotes:

•  “There’s a whole community of us grievers who when we see Christmas lights, we want to spit. Know that you aren’t alone.” 
• “My prayer for you is that you allow yourself the healthy response, which is grieving.” 
• “My prayer for you is to nurture yourself during the holidays while you allow yourself to be a human being. To let yourself grieve, and to let yourself feel.” 

Mentioned:

Dr. Venus Website | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram 

“Hot Mess Millionaire” Amazon Pilot 

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(https://www.youtube.com/c/DrVenusOpalReese)

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RESOURCES

Create Your Own Calm 

1. The Five Stages of Grief