Talk About Talk - Communication Skills Training Dr. Andrea Wojnicki

“Think Do Say” author Ron Tite joins Andrea to talk about thinking before saying, leaning in to our idiosyncrasies (or “bugs”), thoughts on profanity, how filtering your personal brand is like choosing an outfit from your closet, and how to deal with those annoying pitch slappers!

RON TITE RESOURCES



“THINK. DO. SAY.: How to seize attention and build trust in a busy, busy world” by Ron Tite – https://amzn.to/4bO2hqf

LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/rontite/ (no pitch slapping, please)

Church+State agency – https://churchstate.co/

Video reco: “Talking Funny” with Jerry Seinfeld, Chris Rock, Rickey Gervais & Louis CK – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OKY6BGcx37k

Book reco: “What they don’t teach you at Harvard Business School” – https://amzn.to/3yGJaQA



CONNECT WITH ANDREA & TALK ABOUT TALK



* LinkedIn Andrea –  https://www.linkedin.com/in/andreawojnicki/

* LinkedIn Talk about Talk – https://www.linkedin.com/company/talkabouttalk/

* Website: TalkAboutTalk.com

Communication Coaching Newsletter:  https://talkabouttalk.com/blog/#newsletter-signup



YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@talkabouttalkyoutube/





TRANSCRIPT

If you’re like me, and a lot of people that I talk to, you probably have a love hate relationship with social media. We love connecting with interesting people and learning new things. but we hate the annoying people and wasting our time. sound familiar?

I choose to spend most of my time on social media on linkedin.

LinkedIn used to be the online platform for job seekers. but nowadays it’s more like the virtual water cooler conversation. sure it’s focused on our careers and our professional life but it’s a lot more than just job seeking. it’s learning, it’s mentoring, it’s connecting, and a lot more.

Of course there are the folks on LinkedIn who are constantly in sales mode, sending you direct messages To help you accelerate your sales funnel or gain a million followers. I also get a lot of pitches from people who want to be a guest on this podcast or who want to write a guest post on the talkabouttalk.com website. again, this is all about generating sales. So annoying.

That all said, just about every day I read something that inspires me on linkedin. There are certain people who I follow who consistently add value to the platform. one of these folks is the knowledgeable, generous and entertaining Ron Tite, whom you’re going to meet in just a few minutes

In this conversation with ron, you’re going to his advice for how to simplify your out of control brand strategy document. We also talk about how to apply these insights to your own Personal brand. We cover the difference between self-awareness, honesty, transparency and authenticity, we cover insights about profanity, and yes, we talk about Pitch-Slappers… Pitch slappers is the name is the label that Ron tight gave to those annoying folks on social media who politely request a connection and then bam – slap you with a pitch. he even created a segmentation scheme for them.

Pitch slappers is the label that Ron Tite gave to those annoying folks on social media who politely request a connection and then bam – slap you with a pitch.

Are you a giver or a taker? Andrea shares evidence for why being generous can be an advantage plus 5 specific suggestions for how you can be generous at work starting today.

CONNECT WITH ANDREA & TALK ABOUT TALK



* LinkedIn: 



* Andrea –  https://www.linkedin.com/in/andreawojnicki/

* Talk about Talk – https://www.linkedin.com/company/talkabouttalk/





* Website: TalkAboutTalk.com

Communication Coaching Newsletter:  https://talkabouttalk.com/blog/#newsletter-signup



Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@talkabouttalkyoutube/





RESOURCES



“Influence” by Robert Cialdini – https://amzn.to/3M1ScfA



Talk About Talk episodes with Sharon Mah-Gin:

Ep.67 – Online Networking https://www.talkabouttalk.com/67-online-networking-with-sharon-mah-gin/

Ep.107 – Communication Skills for JOB-SEEKERS https://www.talkabouttalk.com/107-job-seekers/



Ep.146 – Resume Best Practices https://www.talkabouttalk.com/resume-best-practices-with-executive-recruiter-sharon-mah-gin-ep-146/





Academic Papers:



“Everyday Prosociality in the Workplace: The Reinforcing Benefits of Giving, Getting, and Glimpsing”  Chancellor, Margolis, Bao, Lyubomirsky 

Aknin, Lara B., Elizabeth W. Dunn, Ashley V. Whillans, Adam M. Grant, and Michael I. Norton. “Making a Difference Matters: Impact Unlocks the Emotional Benefits of Prosocial Spending.” Journal of Economic Behavior & Organization 88 (April 2013): 90–95.

“Social Motivation: Costs and Benefits of Selfishness and Otherishness” Crocker, Canevello, Brown, Annual Review of Psychology











TRANSCRIPT

I’ve been hearing the word GENEROUS a lot lately.  In different contexts. So I started to take notice.

I proactively identified situations or contexts where I saw people being generous – or being selfish.  And I identified people in my network who are generous – the givers, versus the takers.  

What about YOU? Are you a giver or a taker?  Of course we like to think of ourselves as givers, not takers.  But does it actually matter?  I mean, I see a lot of selfish people out there doing pretty well.  Am I right? 

Yes, we are wired to be self-interested.  If we weren’t, we would not survive.

But that does NOT mean that we always ACT in a way that is self-serving.  Research shows that we are very capable of acts of kindness, compassion and yes – generosity, even when we might be acting against our best interests.  Research also shows there are great benefits of being generous.

In this episode, you’re going to learn about the power of generosity and what they call “prosocial behavior”, specifically at work. I’m going to tell you what the research says about the impact of being a giver versus a taker.  Spoiler alert: being a taker might benefit you in the short term, but that’s about it. You want to be a taker.  I’m also going to provide you with five specific ways that you can be more generous at work, starting right now.

Are you a powerful storyteller? Andrea interviews strategy and storytelling expert Rob Tait, who shares examples of and suggestions for great stories. These insights apply to stories from and about both product brands (marketing) and people brands (personal branding). NOTE: the accompanying free “Storytelling Tip Sheet” includes Rob’s 9-step process for creating compelling presentations and lots more to help you become a better storyteller.

 

Free “STORYTELLING TIP SHEET”: https://talkabouttalk.com/storytelling

 

CONNECT WITH ANDREA & TALK ABOUT TALK



* LinkedIn: 



* Andrea –  https://www.linkedin.com/in/andreawojnicki/

* Talk about Talk – https://www.linkedin.com/company/talkabouttalk/





* Website: TalkAboutTalk.com

Communication Coaching Newsletter:  https://talkabouttalk.com/blog/#newsletter-signup



Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@talkabouttalkyoutube/



 

RESOURCES



Rob Tait:



LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/robtait/

Email – robmtait@gmail.com

Website – https://www.taitstrategicstorytelling.com/





ep.11 STORYTELLING with Harvard Professor Jerry Zaltman – https://www.talkabouttalk.com/11-storytelling-with-harvard-professor-author-jerry-zaltman/

Ken Robinson TedTalk “Do Schools Kill Creativity?” – https://youtu.be/iG9CE55wbtY?feature=shared

Adam Grant – https://adamgrant.net/

Terry O’Reilly Under The Influence – https://terryoreilly.ca/undertheinfluence/

Jeopardy podcast – https://www.jeopardy.com/listen/inside-jeopardy

Volkswagen ad – https://youtu.be/SBNSWjkFrOM?feature=shared

Nancy Duarte – https://www.duarte.com/

Steve Jobs –  https://youtu.be/MnrJzXM7a6o?feature=shared





TRANSCRIPT

Well, hello there and welcome to talk about Talk Podcast Episode #151.  The Power of Storytelling with Rob Tait.

Yes, this is episode #151. I’ve been doing this for a while. I remember way back in the early days, when I was learning the craft of podcasting, I used to listen to a podcast called,  The school of podcasting with Dave Jackson. I listened to it every single week. I considered him to be my podcasting coach. Kind of like the way I hope that I am your executive communication coach. Anyway, one day I finally got the nerve to email him, and then he ended up featuring me on his podcast a couple of times. 

 

Before one of the interviews when he interviewed me, he asked me to suggest a specific TAT podcast episodes that will give him some idea of what I do. I remember this. Viscerally. I suggested that he listened to podcast episode number 58, mentally preparing to communicate with confidence. In our conversation before the interview, he said to me, I listened to that episode you suggested. You definitely know what you’re doing.

Are you a thought leader? Andrea interviews prolific thought leader Roger Martin, professor emeritus and past Dean of the Rotman School of Management at University of Toronto. Learn the distinction between private and public thought leadership, why you should consider your cadence in publishing, and three objective criteria to use when evaluating your brand promise, whether it’s for an advertising campaign or for your own personal brand.

 

CONNECT WITH ANDREA & TALK ABOUT TALK



* LinkedIn: 



* Andrea –  https://www.linkedin.com/in/andreawojnicki/

* Talk about Talk – https://www.linkedin.com/company/talkabouttalk/





* Website: TalkAboutTalk.com

Communication Coaching Newsletter:  https://talkabouttalk.com/blog/#newsletter-signup



Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@talkabouttalkyoutube/



RESOURCES



Roger Martin



https://rogerlmartin.com/





HBR – Harvard Business Review –









2023 Year in Review – https://hbr.org/year-in-review

Roger Martin’s Jan’24 HBR article – https://hbr.org/2024/01/the-right-way-to-build-your-brand

Andrea’s Self-Introduction article – https://hbr.org/2022/08/a-simple-way-to-introduce-yourself

Roger Martin video (A Plan is Not a Strategy) – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iuYlGRnC7J8

Michael Porter HBR video (Porter’s 5 Forces) – https://youtu.be/mYF2_FBCvXw?





* Smart Brevity book – https://amzn.to/3pj2Jdj





Roger’s Favorite Thought Leaders –









Amy Edmondson – https://amycedmondson.com/

Adam Grant – https://adamgrant.net/

Dan Pink – https://www.danpink.com/









Roger’s favorite podcasts –









Farnham Street Knowledge Project podcast – https://fs.blog/knowledge-project-podcast/

Tiffany Bova’s What’s Next! podcast – https://www.tiffanibova.com/whats-next-podcast/









TRANSCRIPT

Well, hello there and welcome to talk about Talk Podcast Episode #150. I am so excited about this episode. Today we’re tackling the topic of thought leadership and building your brand.

 

Just over a month ago, I was sitting in the waiting room of my eye doctor scrolling through emails on my phone when I saw an e-mail from HBR – Harvard Business Review. The e-mail was titled “HBR’s best of 2023.” Interesting. So I opened up the e-mail and I started scrolling. … I paused because I couldn’t believe my eyes, and then I gasped out loud. Someone asked me. Are you OK? I had a huge smile on my face. Yes, I’m definitely OK, thank you.

 

What I saw on my phone was the announcement that my HBR article entitled, “A Simple Framework to Introduce Yourself”, was one of the top 3 most read articles in HBR in 2023. Wow, I couldn’t believe my eyes. 

 

I kept scrolling through the email and I saw a face that looked very familiar. It was the face of Roger Martin, my old boss,

 

Is it ok to swear at work? Do you use profanity at work? Dr. Andrea Wojnicki shares the myths about profanity and highlights what the research says about the pros and cons of swearing at work.

 

CONNECT WITH ANDREA & TALK ABOUT TALK



* LinkedIn: 



* Andrea –  https://www.linkedin.com/in/andreawojnicki/

* Talk about Talk – https://www.linkedin.com/company/talkabouttalk/





* Website: TalkAboutTalk.com

Communication Coaching Newsletter:  https://talkabouttalk.com/blog/#newsletter-signup



Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@talkabouttalkyoutube/





RESOURCES



* Ep.23 – PROFANITY: TALKING TABOO with linguistics professor Darin Flynn – https://www.talkabouttalk.com/23s2-explicit-profanity-talking-taboo-with-linguistics-professor-darin-flynn/

* Yehuda Baruch and Stuart Jenkins, 2007, “Swearing at work and permissive leadership culture When anti-social becomes social and incivility is acceptable “Leadership & Organization Development Journal Vol. 28 No. 6, pp. 492-507  (Read the article) Y Baruch, R Prouska, A Ollier-Malaterre, J Bunk (2017) “Swearing at Work: The Mixed Outcomes of Profanity” Journal of Managerial Psychology

* Darin Flynn: “White people should never rap the n-word: A linguist breaks it down“- https://nationalpost.com/pmn/news-pmn/white-people-should-never-rap-the-n-word-a-linguist-breaks-it-down

* Darin Flinn: “What the &*$%?: What qualifies as a “bad” word nowadays?” – http://www.calgaryherald.com/swerve/features/What+What+qualifies+word+nowadays/8873621/story.html





 

TRANSCRIPT

Well, hello there and welcome to the Talk About Talk podcast. Today I’m going to help us answer an important question: Is it OK to swear at work?

Recently I had a consult, a short virtual introductory meeting with a prospective client. Let’s call her Candace. I immediately liked Candace. I could tell she was incredibly ambitious. Super smart and very keen to boost her communication skills. She had what you would call a strong personality. I also noticed that she swore. Like a lot. Like, not just. Oh God or WTF. She was dropping F bombs. At one point in our conversation, I even made a joke about this, mentioning that as a communication coach, I have to highlight that she uses profanity excessively compared to most of my executive clients. Her response was basically, “I’m going to talk the way I’m going to talk.”

OK…

After Candace hired me to help her with her communication skills, I spoke with her manager. I often do this so I can get a better feel for where the real opportunities are for my clients. Her manager told me that Candace has got to stop swearing. Her colleagues and clients all find it offensive. 

The good news is that Candace immediately agreed that she’s going to make this change. And she’s done so. Every now and then, in one of our coaching sessions, she’ll let one slip.

Improve our self-awareness – Based on her research and coaching experiences, Andrea announces her personal goal for 2024: improving her self-awareness. Learn the distinction between consciousness, self-consciousness, and self-awareness. Andrea challenges listeners to diagnose their own internal and external self-awareness levels and commit to three specific goals for improvement in 2024, just like she did!

CONNECT WITH ANDREA & TALK ABOUT TALK



* LinkedIn: 



* Andrea –  https://www.linkedin.com/in/andreawojnicki/

* Talk about Talk – https://www.linkedin.com/company/talkabouttalk/





* Website: TalkAboutTalk.com

Communication Coaching Newsletter:  https://talkabouttalk.com/blog/#newsletter-signup

Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@talkabouttalkyoutube/



 

RELATED EPISODES



* Ep.121 – Self-Awareness – https://www.talkabouttalk.com/121-self-awareness/

* Ep.96 – The 3 Point Body Language Scan – https://www.talkabouttalk.com/96-3pt-body-language-scan/





 

TRANSCRIPT

Happy new year!  For me, a new calendar year is a blank slate. I’m optimistic about what’s ahead.  I’m also big on goals.  On looking back, assessing, and then looking forward with purpose and focus.

Based on all the research, the reading and the coaching I did over the past year, I decided that the area where I personally want to focus this year is SELF-AWARENESS. I encourage you to do the same. 

After I challenged myself to come up with one, meta-level communication goal for myself for 2024, I decided to create an episode where I share with you exactly how I’m thinking about that goal and how I will make it happen.  Again, my hope is that this will inspire you to do the same.

Most of us think we are SELF-AWARE.  But research indicates that only 10-15% of us are technically considered highly SELF-AWARE.

Way back in episode 121. I shared a story about Ashley a high potential sr executive that I was coaching.  We’re talking high potential for the CEO position. After coaching Ashley for several weeks, she told me that she was very excited because she had a moment, an awakening, in the middle of one of her team meetings, when she suddenly became aware of her thoughts, or her body language, and of how others were perceiving her. Basically she suddenly became aware of her own awareness.  This made me very happy!

But I was also shocked, frankly, that she hadn’t consciously experienced that before. It was like an awakening that unlocked her communication effectiveness. 

Since then, I’ve been thinking and reading a lot about self-awareness. For me, self-awareness belongs right up there with adopting a growth mindset in terms of the most important things we can focus on to improve our communication, our performance, and our life.

Yes, it’s that big.

Welcome to TAT episode 148 – where I’m going to share with you my communication goal for 2024, and how I’m going to achieve it. Spoiler alert – its all about self-awareness. 

First, let me briefly introduce myself. My name is Dr. Andrea Wojnicki and I’m your executive communication coach. Please call me Andrea!

I’m the founder of Talk About Talk, where I coach communication skills to ambitious executi...