Midlife AF Podcast

Emma Gilmour
  • 5.0 (2)
  • SELF-IMPROVEMENT
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

Finding Your Groove Without Booze

  1. #123 Rise AF

    JAN 29

    #123 Rise AF

    In this episode, I guide you through my “Rise” framework for changing your relationship with alcohol. We explore why your drinking is never about “willpower” or “moral failure” and is almost always about unmet needs, nervous system overwhelm, and outdated beliefs you’ve carried for years. I share how grounding, visualisation, and gentle self‑inquiry can help your brain feel safer with change, so you’re not constantly “white‑knuckling it” around booze. I walk you through core concepts I use in my programs - like curiosity over judgment, understanding dopamine and why we chase it, building a compelling vision for an alcohol‑light life, and using awareness tools instead of shame. We also talk about the power of immersion (podcasts, books, social media), why community is so vital, and how to start making a practical plan that fits your real life - not some perfect, imaginary version of you. Throughout, I share stories from clients who’ve gone from anxious, exhausted and stuck to feeling grounded, self‑trusting and genuinely indifferent to alcohol - more like a “cheese sandwich” than a magical elixir. If you’re a midlife woman (especially neurodivergent like me) who’s drinking more than you want to and is tired of feeling like the problem, this conversation offers a kinder, more compassionate way forward. Key Takeaways I always start with grounding (breath, body awareness, connection to the earth) because getting out of your head and into your body makes change feel safer to your nervous system. You are not your thoughts; you are the thinker of your thoughts - this gives you space to question old stories about alcohol, yourself and the world. Many women drink more than they want to because nobody says “thank you,” “well done,” or “good job” - booze becomes a shortcut to relief and recognition. My work is about taking a break from taking a break - stepping out of judgment and resistance and into curiosity and inquiry rather than focusing only on stopping. We examine three levels of belief:Beliefs about the substance (alcohol itself)Beliefs about society (what’s “normal,” social expectations)Beliefs about self (worthiness, competence, identity) Dopamine isn’t a moral issue; it’s biology. We’re wired to seek it, and alcohol gives us an unearned, easy hit, which can distort how good we think it is. Craving is usually your body saying “I’m not okay”, not that you’re weak - often it’s about tiredness, loneliness, overwhelm, social anxiety, or people‑pleasing. Alcohol is almost always a solution to a problem, not the problem itself. Until we understand the underlying need, change won’t stick. Awareness worksheets and mindful tracking turn “slip‑ups” into data points, so we can ask: What happened? What was I feeling? What did I really need? Self‑compassion is non‑negotiable: I ask, “What would I say to me if I were someone I loved?”-especially when things don’t go to plan. Visualisation tools like the North Star exercise help your brain feel safer, because it gets a clear picture of what an alcohol‑light day could actually look and feel like. Our culture gives alcohol a huge amount of power; I want you to feel about booze the way you do about a cheese sandwich - neutral, take‑it‑or‑leave‑it. We’re taught that being alcohol‑free is boring and miserable; in reality, for many women it’s a massive upgrade in energy, joy, and self‑respect. Immersion works: podcasts, “quit‑lit,” and social media accounts that reflect your values can rewire your beliefs and show you what’s possible. Don’t go to Bunnings for milk - talk about your alcohol journey with people who get it and won’t minimise, shame, or sabotage you. There is no “failure” in my methodology - only learning. The only “fail” is disappearing and not coming back to look at what happened. “Maybe” about drinking is almost always a yes. Setting a clear intention for the day around alcohol is far more powerful than vague hopes. Change involves choosing your hard: the discomfort of staying stuck versus the discomfort of growth and honest self‑reflection. You were never broken; this work is not about fixing you, it’s about understanding your conditioning so you can choose differently. Support and community are essential. We’re not meant to do this alone, and shame thrives in isolation but dissolves in safe, validating spaces. 👉The 3-Day End of Jan Alcohol Reset - Reconnect · Rewire · RiseFREE - My Back to School Gift To You27th-29th January 2026Live on zoom https://us02web.zoom.us/j/82540254435 or in Midlife AF Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/share/g/1AmoBDBtzB/  or at 6 PM Melbourne - AEDT To join live register here https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/fivedayreset  Once registered you can access the replays, resources and work books in the RESET Hub link is here https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/jan-3-day-reset-hub 👉The Link For the 30 Day Great Aussie Alcohol Experiment - Starting Monday Feb 2nd 2026 is:  https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/the_great_aussie_alcohol_experiment Special RESET Discount Codes for the Feb 2nd edition of the 30 Day Great Aussie Alcohol Experiment - Live - Gives you $200 off the Upfront Price or $50 off each payment from the 4 * monthly Payment Plan instalments. Full price with RESET discount is $797 (normally $997) 👉Discount Link open until End Of Play Friday 29th Jan:. Special link to get this price is:  https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/offers/CUotwFPz?coupon_code=RESET Payment plan is $247 * 4 monthly payments (normally $297)  👉Discount Link open until End Of Play Friday 29th Jan.Special link to get this price is:: https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/offers/NCHNReNL/checkout?coupon_code=RESETPP

    1h 1m
  2. #122 Rewired AF

    JAN 28

    #122 Rewired AF

    In this episode, I walk you through my “third way” approach: a compassionate path that sits between white‑knuckling sobriety and feeling stuck in a shame spiral with alcohol. We explore how to get out of resistance and into curiosity, begin reconnecting with our bodies, and gently question the stories we’ve carried for decades. If you’ve ever thought, “What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I just stop at one?” this conversation is for you. You’ll also hear how I work with women in my Great Aussie Alcohol Experiment, why grounding and self‑compassion matter so much, and how shifting beliefs can make alcohol feel more like a cheese sandwich - something you can truly take or leave. Episode Highlights: I encourage you to celebrate yourself simply for being here and examining your relationship with alcohol - most people never do this work. One of the most powerful questions you can ask yourself is: “Why do I like to drink?” answered without judgment. Everything we believe about booze, and much of what we believe about ourselves, is shaped by conditioning, not truth. There are three levels of belief:- Beliefs about the substance (what alcohol “does” for us)- Beliefs about society (what’s normal, social, fun)- Beliefs about self (am I lovable, acceptable, fun without alcohol?) Beliefs about the substance are often the easiest to shift once we understand how alcohol actually affects our brain and body. Alcohol doesn’t truly relax us - it spikes dopamine briefly, then floods us with stress chemicals like cortisol, adrenaline, and dynorphin. Our struggle with alcohol is not a moral failing or lack of willpower; it’s about biology, nervous system regulation, and learned coping. Many of our traits and patterns are actually protective adaptations, not our “true personality.” We didn’t make ourselves - family dynamics, culture, and marketing (like “drink responsibly”) all shape our shame and silence. Shame keeps us alone, and when we’re lonely, we’re more likely to drink. Breaking the shame is part of healing. Dopamine’s job is to make us seek; it shows us alcohol through “rose‑tinted glasses,” which keeps us chasing the “buzz.” Starting with knowledge and awareness - then feelings - then behaviour is far more effective than trying to change behaviour with willpower alone. My “third way” is about building a take‑it‑or‑leave‑it relationship with alcohol, grounded in self‑compassion, nervous system tools, and deeper understanding - not harsh rules. 👉The 3-Day End of Jan Alcohol Reset - Reconnect · Rewire · RiseFREE - My Back to School Gift To You27th-29th January 2026Live on zoom https://us02web.zoom.us/j/82540254435 or in Midlife AF Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/share/g/1AmoBDBtzB/  or at 6 PM Melbourne - AEDT To join live register here https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/3-day-reset Once registered you can access the replays, resources and work books in the RESET Hub link is here https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/jan-3-day-reset-hub 👉The Link For the 30 Day Great Aussie Alcohol Experiment - Starting Monday Feb 2nd 2026 is:  https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/the_great_aussie_alcohol_experiment Special RESET Discount Codes for the Feb 2nd edition of the 30 Day Great Aussie Alcohol Experiment - Live - Gives you $200 off the Upfront Price or $50 off each payment from the 4 * monthly Payment Plan instalments. Full price with RESET discount is $797 (normally $997) 👉Discount Link open until End Of Play Friday 29th Jan:. Special link to get this price is:  https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/offers/CUotwFPz?coupon_code=RESET Payment plan is $247 * 4 monthly payments (normally $297)  👉Discount Link open until End Of Play Friday 29th Jan.Special link to get this price is:: https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/offers/NCHNReNL/checkout?coupon_code=RESETPP

    1h 6m
  3. #121 Reconnected AF

    JAN 28

    #121 Reconnected AF

    In this episode, I invite you into Day 1 of my three-day end-of-January Alcohol Reset, where I share the “third way” of being around alcohol—beyond the old binary of either “miserably sober” or “happily drinking with constant regret.” Speaking from both my professional training and my lived experience, I talk about how I went from a chaotic, booze-fuelled life to a genuinely take-it-or-leave-it relationship with alcohol, where it now has no emotional pull and feels about as interesting as a cheese sandwich. I walk you through why this unique time of year—especially here in Australia, with kids going back to school and summer socialising still in full swing—is actually a powerful moment to pause and reflect before the rest of the year sweeps you away. Rather than pushing you to “just stop drinking,” I introduce the concept of the Pause: taking a break from taking a break, staying curious, and using your current drinking as valuable data instead of a reason to beat yourself up. We explore how self-trust, self-awareness, and self-compassion sit at the heart of sustainable change. I share stories from my own life—from wild nights in London media culture to exhausted contract work, neurodivergent parenting, and those 3am shame spirals—to show you that the real issue isn’t alcohol itself, but why we’re using it. You’ll hear how I now live happily alcohol-free by choice, while still holding space for a million different ways to be around alcohol for others. If you’ve ever felt like alcohol is your reward, your way to decompress, your “me time,” or simply something that has more control over you than you’d like—this episode will help you feel less alone, more understood, and much better equipped to start changing your relationship with alcohol in a kind, non-judgmental way. Key Takeaways (from Emma) I don’t teach “quit or fail”; I teach a third way of being with alcohol that’s based on curiosity, not willpower or white-knuckling. A take-it-or-leave-it relationship with alcohol is possible—where booze has no pull, no drama, and becomes a genuine non-issue. The real problem usually isn’t alcohol itself; it’s the underlying needs we’re trying to meet—stress relief, social ease, escape, rest, sensory regulation, or “me time.” The Pause means taking a break from taking a break: you can keep drinking while you learn, observe, and gather data about your patterns instead of attacking yourself. Beating ourselves up (“I’m weak, I have no willpower”) doesn’t create change; it just dysregulates our nervous system and makes us more likely to drink again. Everything shifts on the other side of awareness: noticing when you first think about alcohol, your rituals, how it tastes and feels, and the true after-effects. My awareness worksheets help you track your thoughts, feelings, routines, and the aftermath of drinking with a non-judgmental, “Martian researcher” mindset. Self-compassion is the antidote to shame and the heart of sustainable change:- Self-kindness instead of self-attack- Common humanity (“I’m not the only one who struggles like this”)- Mindfulness instead of catastrophising and over-identifying with every feeling Many of us drink because being inside our own heads feels like an abusive relationship; the work is to become a soft place to land for ourselves. You do not have to stop drinking to start this work. If you’ve already stopped, great—stay stopped. If you haven’t, you’re still in exactly the right place. My Great Aussie Alcohol Experiment builds on these ideas in a small, trauma-informed, neuro-affirming group, helping you move from “stuck in the cycle” to genuine freedom and choice around alcohol. 👉The 3-Day End of Jan Alcohol Reset - Reconnect · Rewire · RiseFREE - My Back to School Gift To You27th-29th January 2026Live on zoom https://us02web.zoom.us/j/82540254435 or in Midlife AF Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/share/g/1AmoBDBtzB/  or at 6 PM Melbourne - AEDT To join live register here https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/3-day-reset Once registered you can access the replays, resources and work books in the RESET Hub link is here https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/jan-3-day-reset-hub 👉The Link For the 30 Day Great Aussie Alcohol Experiment - Starting Monday Feb 2nd 2026 is:  https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/the_great_aussie_alcohol_experiment Special RESET Discount Codes for the Feb 2nd edition of the 30 Day Great Aussie Alcohol Experiment - Live - Gives you $200 off the Upfront Price or $50 off each payment from the 4 * monthly Payment Plan instalments. Full price with RESET discount is $797 (normally $997) 👉Discount Link open until End Of Play Friday 29th Jan:. Special link to get this price is:  https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/offers/CUotwFPz?coupon_code=RESET Payment plan is $247 * 4 monthly payments (normally $297)  👉Discount Link open until End Of Play Friday 29th Jan.Special link to get this price is:: https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/offers/NCHNReNL/checkout?coupon_code=RESETPP

    1h 7m
  4. #120 Refreshed AF

    12/28/2025

    #120 Refreshed AF

    In this final session of my three-day Festive Alcohol Reset, I walk you through exactly how to move into a “third way” relationship with alcohol - one that isn’t miserable, all‑or‑nothing, or based on shame and willpower. I share how we can step into the New Year feeling refreshed, resourced, and connected to our original, unhurt selves, instead of chasing a “new me” from a place of self‑blame. I talk about why slip‑ups are data, not moral failures, how dopamine and our beliefs keep us stuck, and why self‑compassion is non‑negotiable if we want lasting change. We explore painting a vivid vision of a life where booze is a genuine non‑issue, and I walk you through the core pillars I teach in my programs: knowledge, positive emotion, and aligned action - all wrapped in community, curiosity, and kindness. If your intuition is whispering (or yelling) that alcohol is taking more than it’s giving, this episode will help you see that you are not broken, you are not alone, and there really is a way to make this feel lighter, easier, and even joyful. Episode Highlights I explain my “third way” approach to alcohol - neither white‑knuckled sobriety nor stuck, unhappy drinking. I share why I rarely use the word “sober” and why language matters so much in how we see ourselves and our choices. I reframe slip‑ups as data points, not proof of failure or lack of character. I walk through the three levels of belief that keep us stuck: Beliefs about the substance (“Alcohol relaxes me”) Beliefs about society (“You can’t have fun without booze”) Beliefs about the self (“There’s something wrong with me”). I talk about dopamine - why the first drink feels so good, how alcohol hijacks our reward system, and what that means for cravings. I emphasise that problematic drinking is a normal human response to an addictive substance, not a personal defect. I show how real change comes from knowledge → positive emotion → action, not from goals and willpower alone. I guide you to define how you want to feel in your future relationship with alcohol (e.g. free, relieved, fearless), rather than just how much you want to drink. I invite you to paint a detailed day‑in‑the‑life where alcohol is a non‑issue and you wake up clear, present, and proud. I talk about returning to the “OG” you - the original, unmasked, unprotected self beneath the coping strategies. I explain why blame (of self or others) keeps us out of change and steals our power. I encourage using curiosity over criticism whenever a craving or slip shows up: “What need is unmet here?” I highlight how planning and preparation make social and high‑risk situations far easier to navigate. I share why community and group coaching are so powerful for dissolving shame and showing us we are not alone. I invite listeners into my Aussie Alcohol Experiment, explaining how it helps you cultivate a genuine take‑it‑or‑leave‑it relationship with alcohol, on your own terms. 👉 Join the 3-Day Festive Alcohol Reset (Dec 27–29)Repair · Reconnect · Refresh (Free)https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/3-day-reset 👉 Join the January 2026 Great Aussie Alcohol Experiment - Starts January 1https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/the_great_aussie_alcohol_experiment

    1h 29m
  5. #118 Repaired AF

    12/26/2025

    #118 Repaired AF

    In this special episode of Midlife AF, I guide you through the first part of my three-day Festive alcohol reset designed especially for the wild, wobbly space between Christmas and New Year. I share how I went from looking “fine” on the outside - successful career, running half marathons, oysters and champagne - to feeling utterly broken inside, waking at 3am gripped by shame, anxiety, and promises to myself I couldn’t keep. I introduce a different, deeply compassionate way to change your relationship with alcohol - one that doesn’t rely on willpower, punishment, or labels, and doesn’t even require you to stop drinking to begin. We explore grounding, awareness, and self‑trust, and I explain why you drink for very valid reasons, how dopamine hijacks your brain, and why self‑compassion (not self‑criticism) is the heart of sustainable change. You’ll also hear about my work with women in midlife, my own journey through burnout, bullying at work, neurodivergence, and parenting quirky teens, and how becoming alcohol free has allowed me to become the calm space in my family’s chaos. This is an invitation to pause, get curious, and start gently repairing your relationship with alcohol - and with yourself. Episode Highlights I created this three‑day Festive Reset as a gentle space between Christmas and New Year to repair, reconnect, and refresh your relationship with alcohol. You absolutely do not need to stop drinking to start this work; you can change your relationship with alcohol while still drinking. My approach goes deeper than “top 10 tips” and willpower - it’s built on neuroscience, psychology, and compassionate inquiry. I share my own story: from high‑functioning, overachieving, “healthy” drinker to burned‑out, anxious, and waking at 3am full of shame. On the outside I looked like I had it all together; on the inside I felt like a terrible mum, partner, and person constantly failing herself. Alcohol was my off‑switch from a life crammed with caregiving, a demanding corporate job, neurodivergent kids, and zero bandwidth. Discovering my own and my children’s neurodivergence reframed so much of my past drinking as a coping strategy, not a moral failing. Today I’m happily alcohol free, and far more able to be the “calm space” in my world - even when life is still messy and hard. We start this episode with grounding and breathwork to show how regulating your nervous system can give you what you’re seeking from that first drink. A key goal is rebuilding self‑trust after years of making and breaking promises to yourself about when and how much you’ll drink. Awareness work (like my awareness worksheets) helps you see your triggers, patterns, routines, and the real reasons you drink. Everything you do with alcohol, you do for a reason - usually to escape suffering (loneliness, stress, overwhelm, boredom, pain). Self‑compassion is the core of this methodology: we swap judgment for curiosity and punishment for kindness. I lean on Kristin Neff’s three components of self‑compassion: self‑kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness (you have experiences; you’re not your experiences). Shame and willpower‑based approaches often keep people “white‑knuckling” sobriety for years without real freedom. Dopamine is a survival chemical: your brain thinks alcohol is vital because it delivers a fast, powerful dopamine hit when you’re dysregulated. When you “slip,” instead of spiraling into blame, you can ask, “What was going on for me? How was I feeling? What did I need?” Community - especially among women who “get it”—is incredibly healing; you realize you’re not uniquely broken, you’re completely human. The ultimate aim is a take it or leave it relationship with alcohol and a much more loving, trusting relationship with yourself. 👉 Join the 3-Day Festive Alcohol Reset (Dec 27–29)Repair · Reconnect · Refresh (Free)https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/3-day-reset 👉 Join the January 2026 Great Aussie Alcohol Experiment - Starts January 1https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/the_great_aussie_alcohol_experiment

    1h 24m
  6. #117 Festive AF

    12/15/2025

    #117 Festive AF

    Quick links (no scrolling required)Join the 3-Day Festive Alcohol Reset (Dec 27–29)Repair · Reconnect · RefreshFreehttps://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/3-day-reset Join the January 2026 Great Aussie Alcohol Experiment (Early Bird)Starts January 1Early Bird available until 26 Decemberhttps://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/the_great_aussie_alcohol_experimentEpisode overviewWhat if the reason alcohol feels hard to change isn’t because you’re weak – but because your nervous system is exhausted?In this episode of Midlife AF, I’m reflecting on a milestone I never imagined I’d reach. Nearly six years ago, in January 2020, I took what I thought was just a 30-day break from drinking. I had no intention of giving it up forever. I certainly didn’t expect alcohol to become a complete non-issue in my life.This episode isn’t about willpower or giving something up.It’s about what shifted when I stopped forcing myself and started listening to what my nervous system actually needed.And because the space between Christmas and New Year is often when burnout, busy brains and social exhaustion finally catch up with us, I’ve created something gentle to support you through that in-between. The 3-Day Festive Alcohol ResetRepair · Reconnect · RefreshDecember 27–29This free, three-day Reset is a gentle invitation to pause after the intensity of the festive season and give your nervous system a palate cleanse before the New Year.There is no requirement to stop drinking to take part.Many people find their drinking naturally quietens simply because they feel calmer, clearer and more resourced.What this Reset is about  Repair from the excesses and pressure of the lead-up to Christmas  Reconnect with yourself and your own energy after focusing on everyone else Refresh so you can shine and sparkle your way through the New Year Nothing here is about effort or discipline. It’s about relief.  How it worksEach day, you’ll receive a pre-recorded audio episode you can listen to in your own time.If you’d like extra support or connection, there are optional live sessions available in the morning or evening. You can join one, both, or none at all.Everything is stored in a central hub for all replays, audio files and resources, so you can dip in, catch up, or revisit whenever it suits you.This Reset is designed to fit around your life, not add another thing to manage.What people say about the ResetKerrie“The Alcohol Reset was a great way to press pause on drinking and really evaluate why I drink. The live sessions were warm, inclusive and completely non-judgemental. It made me realise there are so many people just like me. Emma helped me look at things in a way I never had before, and it’s made me want to keep exploring this with myself.”Tracy“The 3 Day Reset was such a positive step forward. Learning that you can’t fail was huge for me. Emma is a wealth of knowledge and so non-judgy. I’ve been constantly listening to the replays.”Anne“The Reset felt like having a like-minded, non-judgemental friend in my living room helping me with something I don’t want to talk about with friends or family. I felt safe, I had so many ‘aha’ moments, and I laughed out loud.”Rebecca“If you’re looking for a non-threatening, non-judgemental way to understand why you drink and decide what to do next, I highly recommend Emma’s 3 Day Reset. It’s supportive, informative and you don’t even have to get off the couch.”Libby“I came away feeling less alone, more connected and ready to keep going with learning how to reconnect with myself with kindness and compassion.”The Great Aussie Alcohol ExperimentJanuary 2026 intake – starts January 1If the Reset leaves you feeling curious about what might be possible with more support, the next step is The Great Aussie Alcohol Experiment – my boutique, trauma-informed program for cultivating a genuine take it or leave it relationship with alcohol, where drinking becomes a non-issue.Unlike many programs that don’t begin until the following Monday, this one starts on January 1, with support from day one as the year turns.Early Bird detailsEarly Bird price: $497Early Bird payment plan: 4 x $148.50(Usually 4 x $297)Places capped at: 25 peopleEarly Bird available until 26 December or until sold outThis is an extraordinary celebration price marking six years since I took a 30-day break in January 2020, a decision I never imagined would change my life in the way it did.What people say about the Great Aussie Alcohol ExperimentSimone“Emma has this amazing ability to help you dig deep to find the real reason you’ve used alcohol to deal with life. She asks in a way that feels gentle and safe. Over the month I was able to remove the layers, look inward, and reframe my future choices using the tools Emma helped me develop. The sense of community and not feeling alone or broken was a huge bonus.”Clare“Having taken part in other alcohol programs, Emma’s was a breath of fresh air. She brings a wealth of knowledge and looks at you as a whole person, not just your drinking. She helps you understand where your triggers come from and supports you to work with them in a safe and compassionate environment.”Toni“Emma is like a ray of sunshine. This experiment meets you wherever you are. She taught me that it’s okay to be unapologetically imperfect and reminded me of the importance of self-love. I finished the experiment with the skills and confidence to trust myself again.”P.S.You don’t need to label yourself.You don’t need to decide anything forever.If alcohol has been taking up more space than you’d like, this is a very kind place to start.

    46 min
  7. #119 Reconnected AF

    11/29/2025

    #119 Reconnected AF

    In this session, I guide you through grounding practices, explore why so much of what we believe about alcohol (and ourselves) simply isn’t true, and share how shifting your beliefs can change your relationship with drinking without willpower, shame, or self‑punishment. I talk about the myths around alcohol “relaxing” us, why we reach for the buzz when life feels overwhelming, and how dopamine and dinorphin actually keep us stuck in a cycle of stress, anxiety, and disappointment. We also look at how cultural conditioning, patriarchy, trauma, and people‑pleasing shape our drinking, and why self‑soothing with alcohol is an intelligent adaptation, not a moral failing. This is an invitation to step out of fear and scarcity and into choice, abundance, and deep self‑compassion as you move toward a take‑it‑or‑leave‑it relationship with alcohol. Episode Highlights This series is a reset, not a reprimand - it’s designed for the wobbly space between Christmas and New Year to help you repair, reconnect, and refresh before stepping into 2026. Grounding is essential, not optional - simple practices like feeling your feet, placing a hand on your chest and tummy, and breathing slowly can regulate your nervous system and bring you back into your body. Beliefs run the show - most of our drinking is driven by unconscious beliefs at three levels: Substance: “Alcohol relaxes me,” “It’s a treat,” “It helps me switch off.”Society: “You can’t celebrate or socialise without booze,” “A proper meal needs wine.” Self: “There’s something wrong with me,” “I’m weak,” “I should have more willpower.” Much of what we believe about alcohol is the opposite of the truth - science shows alcohol floods us with dopamine once, then leaves us with cortisol, adrenaline, and dinorphin, increasing anxiety, low mood, poor sleep, and the urge to drink again. The ‘buzz’ isn’t what you think - it’s not calm or happiness; it’s a dopamine‑fuelled seeking state that makes us chase more, even when the drink doesn’t actually taste or feel that good. You didn’t “make” yourself - your patterns are intelligent adaptations to your upbringing, culture, trauma (big T and small t), and the roles society expects midlife women to play. Compulsive drinking is self‑soothing, not lack of character - as the holistic psychologist says, soothing is instinctual, not moral. You drink because it works… until it doesn’t. Alcohol keeps us small and compliant - it helps us tolerate the intolerable: over‑functioning, people‑pleasing, exhaustion, loneliness, and suppressing our true needs and desires. Real rebellion is going against the drinking norm - in a culture that normalises a toxic substance, choosing to question alcohol and listen to your intuition is deeply counter‑cultural. Dopamine needs to be scaled to effort - quick, high dopamine hits (like alcohol) come with a cost; joy and contentment grow from effortful, value‑aligned actions and genuine connection. Shame and drill‑sergeant tactics don’t create sustainable change - research shows long‑term change comes from kindness, curiosity, and self‑compassion, not punishment and fear. The path to change is threefold: knowledge → emotion → action  Learn how alcohol truly affects your brain, body, and nervous system. Imagine how you want to feel (freedom, peace, self‑trust, ease) and let that pull you forward. Then experiment with behaviour (pauses, breaks, new rituals) from a place of choice, not deprivation. A take‑it‑or‑leave‑it relationship with alcohol is possible - when your beliefs shift and the desire softens, you’re no longer fighting yourself; you’re simply choosing what genuinely serves you.  👉 Join the 3-Day Festive Alcohol Reset (Dec 27–29)Repair · Reconnect · Refresh (Free)https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/3-day-reset 👉 Join the January 2026 Great Aussie Alcohol Experiment - Starts January 1https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/the_great_aussie_alcohol_experiment

    1h 27m
  8. #116 Bored AF

    10/26/2025

    #116 Bored AF

    Let’s get real about boredom, especially when you’re taking a break from alcohol.In this week’s episode, I’m unpacking why “I’m bored” can feel shamey, why stillness can spike dread for trauma survivors and neurodivergent brains, and how comparison pours petrol on the fire. We talk Peter Levine, Internal Family Systems, Kristin Neff, Tara Brach, and Brene Brown, but keep it super practical for real life. If “busy” has been your personality, this one’s a deep exhale and a warm reminder that you’re not broken; you’re human. What we cover: The sneaky origins of boredom shame from childhood and why it sticks. Boredom ≠ lack of stimulation for trauma survivors and ND folks, it’s the threat of being with ourselves. The “second arrow” of self-judgment and how it multiplies pain. Why our nervous system sometimes tries to discharge stored stress in the quiet. How neurodivergent masking leads to crash cycles, comparison, and coping. Practical reframes: becoming the observer, stopping the second arrow, and meeting real needs. Radical acceptance and the beauty of a “nice little life.” Small, doable ways to build capacity for stillness without reaching for a drink. Listen if: You’re alcohol-free or AF-curious, you identify as “always busy,” or you’re tired of comparing your Tuesday to someone else’s highlight reel. Episode links & Resources Click here to book an initial consult with me https://app.acuityscheduling.com/schedule.php?owner=20808150&appointmentType=43677625  Click here for a 15 minute Free inquiry call to for my Be The Lighthouse Membership https://app.acuityscheduling.com/schedule.php?owner=20808150&appointmentType=22037671 Ready to transform your relationship with food before Christmas? My 6 Weeks To Christmas Intuitive Eating Program starts November 10th and runs through December 20th—giving you the tools to navigate the holiday season with confidence, peace, and food freedom. For just $497, you'll get 6 private 1-hour coaching sessions with personalized notes and resources to help you break free from diet culture for good. I'm only offering this program to 4 people as I complete the final element of my qualifications under the supervision of Intuitive Eating founder Evelyn Tribole—which means you'll benefit from her expertise guiding my work with you. This is your chance to experience Christmas without the anxiety, guilt, or food rules. Learn more and secure your spot at https://www.hoperisingcoaching.com/offers/uUeTzEjv

    1h 10m
See All (124)

Trailer

Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
2 Ratings

About

Finding Your Groove Without Booze

Information

  • Creator
    Emma Gilmour
  • Years Active
    2022 - 2026
  • Episodes
    124
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Emma Gilmour - Hope Rising Coaching
  • Show Website
    Midlife AF Podcast