Gen Ex Andie and Duckie
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- Общество и культура
Dive into dating, sex, and relationships with two newly-single Gen X pals Duckie and Andie (pseudonyms borrowed from the classic 80s movie Pretty In Pink) as they dish the dirt and delights of dating and how it’s radically transformed since the 80s and 90s. These graduates from the school of life tackle topics like pandemic booty-calls, threesomes, gender fluidity, sex positivity, polyamory, and kink culture while offering honest, unsolicited advice on everything to do with life and love in these modern times.
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Love Languages
Do you know your Love Language? Do you have to match with people who speak your love language? What do you do when the person you’re into has a different love language than you? Andie and Duckie speak different love languages and together share their best tips for loving and communicating with partners.
Show links
The original book about the 5 Love Language
https://www.amazon.com/Love-Languages-Secret-that-Lasts/dp/080241270X
Understanding the 5 languages (in case you don’t want to do the book)
https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/the-5-love-languages-explained
How to deal if you and your partner don’t speak the same language
https://www.bustle.com/articles/161169-how-to-cope-when-you-your-partner-have-different-love-languages
Share your thoughts, questions, feedback, and dating frustrations: genexpod@gmail.com
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QUICKIE: FWB
What if you catch the feels for your Friend With Benefits (FWB) and want to turn them into a "real" relationship? Also: Andie thinks there's really no such thing as a FWB.
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Just One Dick Forever?!?
After a long-term relationship ends, some of us fear commitment. Divorce forever shatters the illusion of “til death do us part” so is fear of commitment simply a more realistic perspective on love and relationships or are we just wounded and suffering from commitment phobia? Is it possible to be in a committed relationship and still maintain autonomy and freedom? What even qualifies as is long-term, post-divorce? Andie and Duckie tackle their own commitment issues and explore the fact that post-divorce they’ve both gravitated towards relationship structures that are not strictly monogamous. Has this helped? Can ethically non-monogamous or monogamish relationships be considered commitments?
Show Links
WebMD’s definition of Commitment Phobia in case you think you have a real phobia!
https://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/commitment-phobia-symptoms-signs
Alternatives to Monogamy in case the idea of only being with one person freaks you out but you still find yourself wanting to develop beyond casually dating someone.
https://sexualbeing.org/blog/8-relationship-alternatives-to-monogamy/
The quote Andie shared: “The capacity to be alone is the capacity to love. It may look paradoxical to you, but it’s not. It is an existential truth: only those people who are capable of being alone are capable of love, of sharing, of going into the deepest core of another person–without possessing the other, without becoming dependent on the other, without reducing the other to a thing, and without becoming addicted to the other. They allow the other absolute freedom because they know that if the other leaves, they will be as happy as they are now. Their happiness cannot be taken by the other, because it is not given by the other.” – Osho (This guy was the founder of the Rajneesh Movement and was a problematic mystic with a lot of radical ideas BUT his thoughts about love are pretty cool.
https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/1432084-being-in-love-how-to-love-with-awareness-and-relate-without-fear
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QUICKIE: Cuffing Season
What is Cuffing Season and why does it suck? Who do you bring to your office holiday party, especially if you're newly dating or poly? Andie and Duckie have thoughts.
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Kinky Lovers
Does your sex life and fantasies fall outside the normative ideas of vanilla sex? Where do you fall on the kink spectrum? Andie and Duckie spill the tea about kink compatibility and their own experiments in kinkville — from choking, to BDSM, to cuckolding, fetishes, water sports, age play, and more. The good news is that getting kinky the bedroom can have multiple benefits for your sex life, your relationships, and even your mental health outside the bedroom. If you haven’t had the opportunity to fully explore your kinks yet, there’s not better time to incorporate kinks into your dating life.
Show Links:
1 in 5 of Your Friends Is Getting Kinky — Should You Be Too? - Healthline
A to Z Kinks and Fetishes - The Bad Girls Bible
Kink Test - a quiz that helps you map out your own kinky side
7 Best Kink Dating Apps - Dating XP
Lorals oral for women without the skin-to-skin contact
Skyn Condoms - Andie + Duckie’s fav, but feel free to send samples of other condoms to change our minds ;-)
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Texting and Sexting
Do you give good text? Even if you hate texting, it’s a required skill to navigate today’s dating world because if you don’t have a good texting game, most matches will fizzle out. Andie and Duckie share their best tactics for flirting and building connections so you can get off your phone and go on actual dates! From decent opening lines to practicing your flirty to dirty sexting so you can take the conversation into salacious territory and keep the banter going between dates without seeming overeager.
Show Links:
Slutbot is free tool that lets you practice talking dirty over text with a chatbot.
Can you fall in love with someone via text? - Venngage
Understanding the dynamics of texting in relationships - Very Well Mind
Tinder’s Hot Takes - for a blind texting experience that lets you text before you match
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Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/gen-ex/message