Memoir Snob Charlie Bleecker

Here’s what I learned from three sobriety memoirs:

The Night of the Gun by David Carr:

Interview the people from your past. It doesn’t have to be formal or recorded. It could be as simple as a text message to see what they remember about the event. 

This can accomplish three things: 


It’s a way to add more details into your story. 


It allows the person to feel like they’re a part of the process of writing it as opposed to feeling like it’s one-sided. 


It makes you, the writer, more relatable and reliable because you’re giving different perspectives. 



The Unexpected Joy Of Being Sober by Catherine Gray:

Don’t break the fourth wall to manipulate the reader or try to get them on your side. Breaking the fourth wall should always be a statement, not a question. 

Option: Use sarcasm or let them in on a secret. 

We Are The Luckiest by Laura McKowen:

Just tell the story and leave the reader out of it. 

Heres’s what I learned from Drinking: A Love Story by Caroline Knapp

AND

The Elements Of Eloquence by Mark Forsyth.


Anaphora is when you start each phrase, sentence, or paragraph with the same word or words. But be careful: readers always remember the opening words but often forget the rest. So when using anaphora, be intentional about what you want to emphasize. Also, only using one word for the anaphora—as opposed to a phrase—is slightly less powerful but beautifully hypnotic. 


Epistrophe is when you end each phrase, sentence, or paragraph with the same word.


Diacope is when a word or phrase is repeated after a brief interruption.


Parataxis is short, clear, matter-of-fact sentences, often subject-verb, without conjunctions (think Hemingway). Knapp was selective with parataxis, using it when she wrote about the moment she found out her father died and again at the moment her mother died. In both instances, it was a shocking, cringey admission because she was drunk both times.


Pleonasm is the use of unneeded words, sometimes repeating the exact same word, other times saying the same thing in a slightly different way. This can annoy readers, but when utilized for intentional redundancy can be quite effective and powerful.

Do you want to write under a pseudonym or not?


I have been writing as Charlie Bleecker for over four years. If you want to give it a real go, commit to it for a year. 


Do my friends read my writing? No. Does my family read my writing? No. That is the whole point. 


If you care at all about growing your audience in a time span of less than 10 years, don’t do it.


What about support? It’s nice to have your family and friends support you… That’s true. But give it time. You only need one or two people to support you in the beginning. I have SO much support now, and none of it comes from my friends or family, except for my husband. He is the one person in my life who knew about Charlie from the beginning.


How to choose your name: Pick a name you like! One that’s easy to say and easy to spell and isn’t super common if you search it in Google. 

Here’s what I learned from Life On Delay by John Hendrickson:

On Structure:


When you open with a big event, where something big is about to happen, it creates suspense.


The opening is a pivotal moment. There was life before this moment, and then there’s life after. 


Around ¾ of the way through the book he comes back to this moment and finishes the story. 


The life-changing moment is only the beginning of the major changes to come for John (aka, the main character). The life changing moment, then, is a catalyst for change and growth. 



On the relationships with his family, namely his brother Matt:


Adjectives are manipulative when describing the people you’re close to. Showing is always more compelling than telling. 


When writing about your past—especially your adolescence—the best way to evoke emotion out of the reader is to leave your feelings out of it, whether they were your feelings back then or your feelings now.


The best way to introduce a main character in your story is through multiple stories about them.


When introducing a character who you had or have a troubled relationship with, it’s important to write about them completely separate from you. So there should be stories that involve you AND stories that don’t involve you, so the reader can get a fuller sense of who this person is.


Phrases I will never write in my own book: “I don’t blame them,” or “absolutely thrilled.” 



Other Notes:


When jumping around to past, present, and future, it’s important to find ways of anchoring the reader and orienting them by letting them know where we are on the timeline, in relation to big events that have already occurred in the story. 


Freeze frame: when you’ve finally arrived at a big moment—in this book’s case, a hard conversation—one way to build suspense is to break up the dialogue by commenting on something else that’s happening at the same time. In this instance, John wrote about what was going on in his head simultaneously.  



On Endings: 


A powerful way to end is with a story. It doesn’t have to be fancy or clever. This was simple, abrupt, and beautiful. 



Here’s the link to Michael Dean’s video about the David Foster Wallace essay: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wbjup1xuo8Q&t=1s

Here’s what I learned from How Tracy Austin Broke My Heart by David Foster Wallace:


Rather than tell us how bad the memoir was, he lists eight (eight!) examples—all quotes from the book. 


Later, he explicitly tells us how bad TV interviews of top athletes are, then gives two very long and detailed back-to-back examples to make his point. 


The best memoirs are written by writers, and celebrity memoirs are trash.

Here’s what I learned from My Fair Junkie by Amy Dresner:


Amy Dresner is the second memoirist I’ve read who had a life changing moment with a breathwork teacher—Glennon Doyle was the first, in Love Warrior. So I found a breathwork person near me and did it! I don’t know if it was life changing but I definitely had a moment. 


Character intros should have lots of specific details, and don’t be afraid to make them long, like three or four sentences. 


A rule about parentheticals: they should always only be hilarious.


Lots of examples of how to not write your feelings or your own commentary to the story, especially when the dialogue is gold (as it was in Amy’s story). 



And a quick update on my memoir!