235: Master the art of saying NO

INTRO:

Hey, thanks for tuning in to the Corporate Yogi podcast, I’m your host Julie Zuzek. This pod is YOUR dedicated time for growth, developing practical tools to use with your team and other relationships and to learning deeply about who you are and what makes you tick! Because you are a brilliant and powerful being and I want you to invest more time reflecting on WHO are being, not just WHAT you are doing. Doing is awesome, but BEING, well that is where the magic happens and what makes you truly feel fulfilled. You’re going to love this episode.  So, here’s a look at what you’re going to learn today

1 – In the first segment you’’ll learn why we struggle to say NO

2 – Then in the second segment you’ll learn the correlation between yes and NO

3 – And in the last segment you’ll learn tips to say NO

So get out of your head, into your heart and let’s dive right in, shall we.

SEGMENT 1 

 I know that some of you don’t struggle with saying NO, and that is awesome. Give yourself a pat on the back!

But for the rest of us, especially those of us who suffer from the disease to please, saying NO is a muscle that we have to build. And what is the best way to build a muscle?

a) Avoid using it at all costs

b) Use it all the time, no matter how scared you are, no matter how messy it is and focus on building the behaviour not being attached to the results.

I hope you guessed B, and that’s a little Tough love for you today. I know when we’re scared or when we don’t like doing something, we avoid it at all costs. But sadly this doesn’t get us anywhere. When we avoid something we NEVER, ever ever get better at it, right? Do we? But if we try it, and keep trying it, we’ll get better at it, and it will get easier, I guarantee it. Remember that wayne gretsky quote, we fail at 100% of the shots we don’t take. 

Do you remember when we talked about the Hard Epidemic? The Hard Epidemic happens when we label something “Hard” in an excuse to avoid doing it. Well I think this is a good time to remind ourselves about the epidemic, because I think it really applies to this example of saying NO. It’s not hard, it’s just new. Saying NO is a perfect example of mindset, and how we need to master ours.

So there’s a few reasons why we struggle with saying NO:

- First the disease to please. We have that image consultant saboteur worrying about what people are thinking about us. But I guarantee you, they’re not thinking about you anywhere near as much as you think they are. Chances are, they’re just thinking about themselves. So, you’ve gotta let that go.

- Second, It’s a little hit of happiness. we really authentically want to help and say the Yes, because it feels good. We’re going to do something new and exciting, maybe we’re going to make someone else happy in the process. It just feels good. But I’m going to let you in on a secret. Saying NO can also feel equally good and very powerful. I promise you!

- Thirdly, We’re in a routine or don’t know we have an option. And this is really simple and obvious but sometimes we’re just completely in a routine of saying yes right away or we’re in a rut of saying Yes, and we don’t realize we have options. So this is a good opportunity for you to check in, take an inventory and see if there’s anything you are doing out of obligation.

- Lastly, We lack the tools. If saying NO is an underdeveloped muscle for you, then I’m going to help you out and give you some great tools that will help you dive in and get started. Don’t you worry, I’ve got you covered.

SEGMENT 2   

We’ll look at the relationship between yes and no.

I want you to think about Yes and No as being 2 sides of a coin – and they are directly correlated, because remember, y