Brave Battle Bear

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Welcome to Interesting If True, the podcast that is the equivalent of a bathroom reader. Quick interesting facts and a whole lot of BS.

I’m your host this week, Shea, and with me are (introduce each host and their blurb)

I’m Steve, and I have news. We have a new cat. His name is Evander and he’s 5. Also, his breath smells like he has a rotting corpse stuck between his teeth. Vet visit later this week.

I’m Aaron, and this week I learned that, while dogs are great, ancient-man really missed the ball on domesticating bears.

Jenn couldn’t be here today, but thanks to the power of forethought she’ll be joining us in 3… 2… 1…

Brave Battle Bear!

What’s better than pretty much everything?

Any guesses?

And Shea can’t guess because it’s cheating.

• https://vinepair.com/articles/bear-war-hero-beer-history/
• https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wojtek_(bear)
• https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/wojtek-bear-named-second-world-war-film-polish-soldiers-monte-cassino-snowman-private-army-carried-a8553001.html
• http://time.com/4731787/wojtek-the-bear-history/
• https://www.history.com/topics/world-war-ii/battles-of-monte-cassino

How about a munition-toting, cigar-smoking, beer-drinking, Nazi-fighting, grizzly bear?

In honor of the recently observed Memorial Day, I bring the story of an Allied soldier who more people need to have heard of, Wojtek the Bear. (Who is referred to as a brown bear, but that’s also a grizzly bear, and I prefer that title.)

In 1942 a group of Polish prisoners of war, which included both soldiers and civilians, had been liberated from a camp in Siberia. The early days of WWII were especially awful for the Poles as Nazi Germany was of course marching thru, but the Soviets were also willing to round them up to work labor camps.

“The Allies got together in 1942 and made a pact with Stalin in which they could release the Poles to join the Allies’ troops,” according to Aileen Orr, author of Wojtek the Bear: Polish War Hero. The soldiers (plus a few civilian refugees) were then sent on to Alexandria, Egypt where they would then travel to Europe to join the World War, already in progress.

Whilst in route through the Middle East, the newly liberated soldiers encountered a young boy who had discovered an orphaned bear cub in the mountains of Persia (now Iran). The boy wandered into the camp, hungry, carry the little bear in a sack, looking for food. It was April 8, 1942 and the group of un-homed, transplanted people were drawn to the little creature who had also lost his family and home (they did also feed the boy). The bear was tiny and malnourished, since his mother had been killed by a hunter and NOW HE WAS IN A SACK.

One of the civilian refugees in their midst, eighteen-year-old Irena (Inka) Bokiewicz was especially taken with the little furball and convinced Lieutenant Anatol Tarnowiecki to buy the young bear (rumored for a few cans of corned beef), who then spent the next three months in a Polish refugee camp established near Tehran. He was technically under Irena’s care, but the soldiers were also happy to babysit, feeding him condensed milk from an old vodka bottle, and marmalade (Pattington!), bits of fruit and honey. But his favorite treat was quickly discovered to beer, which became his favorite drink. (We’ve found our show spirit animal!)

I had no luck finding exactly how long this journey to Alexandria was, but it’s looking like it was lengthy. By the time soldiers were on their way from the camp to join the newly formed Polish army, the little bear, who had been named Wojtek (an old Slavic name name meaning ‘Happy Warrior) was gifted to the 22nd Transport Company, Artillery Division, Polish 2nd Corp. With the 22nd Corp he traveled to Egypt.

He became the official mascot of the soldiers, and as he grew developed adorable and soldier-appropriate mannerisms. Per time.com: “He would accept lit cigarettes, take a puff and swallow them,” said Dymitr Szawlugo, one of the soldiers who took care of the bear. “He loved to drink from a beer bottle, and when it was empty, he would look through the opening to see where the rest of the beer was.”

Since he was a precious orphan adopted by homeless ex-Gulag workers, he would cuddle with the other soldiers if they were ever cold in the night. He also seemed to really enjoy wrestling and play-fighting with the other soldiers. Of course, he was the most badass ass-kicking wrestler in the entire company, thanks in part to the fact that he grew to be six feet tall, weighed roughly five hundred pounds, and could knock small trees over with a single swing of his massive, clawed paw. When he got bigger, the men even taught Wojtek how to pick up new recruits and hold them upside by the boots to make the rookies think they were getting eaten.

He became a real soldier-bear, too. He learned to salute when greeted and, without prompting, began to march on his hind legs when he saw other soldiers doing so. When the motorized convoy was on the move, Woytek sat in the passenger seat of one of the jeeps, hanging his head out the window and shocking the shit out of people walking down the street.In fact, Wojtek was officially drafted into the Polish Army as a private and was listed among the soldiers of the 22nd Artillery Supply Company, due to the fact that regulations forbade mascot and pet animals. Henryk Zacharewicz and Dymitr Szawlugo (mentioned above) were assigned as his caretakers.

But as Wojtek grew older and larger, so did his hunger and thirst. He was often found in the galley, eating anything he could (seeing as he was a bear, it was probably most everything there). He would chase after oranges that the men used for grenade practice. In fact, as an official soldier he was due a paycheck, which in his case translated into double food rations. Wojtek also learned how to break into the communal shower huts and turn on the shower on his own, which was a problem because the water was rationed and his ingeniousness would sometimes result in water shortages. So they opted to give a 500-pound bear their spare beer and wine, like you do. (Side note, if I were a WWII soldier I highly doubt I would have any extra beer or wine.) But his time splashing around in the bath houses wasn’t for nothing. While in Palestine, he had been barred from his beloved baths (bc Middle East’s water rations don’t equal bear-sized baths).

He took to loitering around the outside of the bath houses, and one day found the door unlocked. (Seriously, they kept him out by locking the doors, so A+ on well-made doors.) He wandered into the bath hut for some splashy-time and came across an Arab spy who had been planted to gather intelligence on the Allied camp. Voytek growled, slapped the dude upside his stupid Nazi-loving head, and the man (surely) immediately crapped his pants and surrendered. Either way, his screams immediately alerted the allied soldiers and the Soldier Bear was lauded as a hero for successfully capturing an enemy agent, who in turn was interrogated and gave up vital intelligence on enemy positions.

In 1943 the regiment headed off for Italy, where they linked up with the hardcore British 8th Army. It took some convincing for the Brits to allow this very, um, unusual soldier to be allowed to join the campaign. The Polish soldiers explained how he helped the morale and contributed in a variety of ways (spy-catching, anyone?) and eventually the British officials relented and gave him the permit needed to travel with the crew. At that point Wojtek was included on all official rosters and marched on shore with rest of the 22nd Artillery.

They headed out to one of their largest battles, what became known as the Battle of Monte Cassino, which was not nearly as much fun as it sounds.

In fact, per history.com,

“it marked one of the longest and bloodiest engagements of the Italian campaign during World War II. After attempts to overcome the Germans in the Liri Valley and at Anzio ended in stalemate, the Allies struggled to capture the western anchor of the Gustav Line and the Roman Catholic abbey of Monte Cassino. Two more offensives, which resulted in the destruction of the abbey and aerial bombardment of the region, again failed to produce the desired result. Only with the launch of Operation Diadem in May 1944 did the Gustav Line finally collapse, with the Second Polish Corps succeeding in capturing the abbey.”

It was this particularly intense battle, however, that cemented Wojtek’s status as the Best Bear (actual Corporal Best Bear, bc he got a promotion).

According to numerous accounts, during the Battle of Monte Cassino, when Wojtek’s unit conveyed ammunition, he helped by carrying 100-pound (45-kilogram) crates of 25-pound artillery shells, all without dropping a single one. He watched what the soldiers were doing and stood upright with his front paws outstretched, indicating his intentions. The boxes he carried normally required 4 men, and he would stack them onto a truck, or stack the boxes of ammunition onto each other. He worked tirelessly, day and night, bringing supplies to his friends who were bravely battling the Nazis. He never rested, never dropped a single artillery shell, and never show