Step Out of the Shadows and Speak!

Dan O'Connor
  • 4.9 (23)
  • SELF-IMPROVEMENT
Step Out of the Shadows and Speak!

How is that that some people seem to know just what to say all the time? Would you like to find out? Or are you surrounded by narcissists, psychopaths, and total d-bags at work and you’re sick of feeling like they ”got you?” Whether you’re just beginning to improve your communication skills, or you’re looking for advanced communication skills training, you’ll learn something new and useful in every episode that will help you find your voice, speak up, stand your ground, and hold your own even when up against the most skilled and powerful communicators. In this podcast, you’ll learn the secrets master communicators use to always seem to have the right words at the right time. Isn’t it time you stepped out of the shadows and spoke? Brought to you by author, keynote speaker, YouTuber, blogger, and the world’s number one tactical communication skills expert Dan O’Connor.

  1. 09/25/2023

    The 5 Difficult Conversations Every Professional Will Have and Most Will Avoid--How to Slay Them Using Effective Communication Skills

    5 Essential Strategies for Effective Communication in Difficult ConversationsNavigating challenging dialogues is an inevitable part of a professional journey. And the difference between success and failure? The right preparation.The Undeniable Power of Freestyle ScriptsPicture this: a communicator who effortlessly conveys difficult messages. No, it isn't innate talent but honed skills. Enter freestyle scripts. Here's how they work:1. Delivering Unpleasant NewsThe art is in your opening and closing lines. Lead in lines grab attention, set the tone, and prime the other party for a crucial dialogue. A classic example: "Mark, I have some unfortunate news." The closing? Keep it crisp and straightforward, pushing the narrative forward. "Can I count on you?"2. Negotiating a Pay RaiseYour most potent tool isn't your voice; it's your value journal. Documenting your above-and-beyond contributions quantifies your worth, making the negotiation smoother.3. Offering Constructive CriticismConstructive feedback is a dance between precision and tact. Always have a system, like the LBNT approach: "I appreciated your presentation's passion. For a more compelling impact next time, consider diving deeper into the evidence."4. The Art of DecliningA vital part of maintaining balance and integrity is knowing when to say no. Having a system, such as a three-step script, can make this process seamless: "I'd love to assist. However, tonight's not feasible. Might tomorrow morning work?"5. Submitting Your ResignationExiting with grace is as crucial as your tenure. Approach it with professionalism, from the meeting call to the content of your resignation letter. In a world of unpredictable professional dynamics, the key to navigating difficult conversations lies in two words: Don't wing it. Preparation and understanding of effective communication strategies can truly set you apart as a formidable and eloquent communicator.

    14 min
  2. The Nine Principles Episode 1: There is No Neutrality in the Universe

    05/20/2023

    The Nine Principles Episode 1: There is No Neutrality in the Universe

    In this episode, Dan explores how we might not be aware of how our environment is affecting us, but we had better take a look, because it's time to either take a stand or stand down.

    16 min

  3. 03/23/2023

    What am I supposed to say?

    This is the audio version of the video lesson

    13 min
  4. Power Phrases to Shut Down Toxic People--Power Phrase 1

    02/23/2023

    Power Phrases to Shut Down Toxic People--Power Phrase 1

    In any effective communication skills training course you attend, you should learn specific phrases. That said, no matter how hard you might try, it can be difficult to handle toxic people and power phrases can be an effective way to shut them down. They help you set boundaries in a respectful way and offer strategies so that both parties can move past a situation with minimal conflict. When dealing with toxic people, power phrases give you the power to remain composed and express your feelings in a way that does not provoke or encourage aggression. This can help reduce stress while providing clear communication on what's acceptable and what isn't. By using power phrases, you'll be able to maintain control of the conversation without having to be confrontational and can communicate your needs in a respectful way. Power phrases not only help you stand up for yourself but also provide an opportunity to listen and gain new perspectives from the other person. This can lead to meaningful conversations that help both people come to a better understanding of one another. With power phrases, you'll be able to handle difficult conversations with grace and poise, allowing you to move on from any negative situations feeling empowered instead of drained. By implementing power phrases into your daily communication, you'll be equipped with the necessary skills needed when dealing with toxic people. They are an effective tool for shutting down toxic people while still providing a platform for respectful dialogue that can lead to greater understanding between both parties.

    7 min
  5. How to Leave Toxic Meetings | Power Phrases and More

    02/16/2023

    How to Leave Toxic Meetings | Power Phrases and More

    458 views  Feb 16, 2023  #phrasesfordailyuse #communicationtraining #communicationskillstraininghttps://www.danoconnortraining.com/store for all Dan's premium traininghttps://www.danoconnortraining.com/we... for free masterclass How to Leave a Toxic Meeting + Power Phrases for Work Why do you need power phrases for work? Are you stuck in a toxic meeting at work? Do you feel like it's dragging on and on with no end in sight? You'll learn power phrases for the workplace in this professional communication skills training video to help get out of those meetings quickly. Learn how to take back control of your day, leave toxic meetings,  and make the most out of your time!Using the phrase, "I have nothing of value to contribute to this, so I'm going to go back to work, and if you need me, you know where to find me, OK?"  is a great way to start taking back control of your day. This is direct, yet polite, and shows that you are not going to be taken advantage of.Effective communication skills at work can make all the difference in the world. Knowing what to say and when to say it is key. Check out all of Dan's premium communication skills training classes online at https://www.danoconnortraining.com/store.#phrasesfordailyuse #communicationtraining #communicationskillstraining  Remember that people will look to you as a communication role model.  You can be the leader of the pack and help set an example for how meetings should be conducted. Be sure to stay in control, remain positive, and make good use of your time.

    8 min
  6. 4 Mindful Responses to Gaslighting

    11/07/2022

    4 Mindful Responses to Gaslighting

    Mindful responses to gaslighting. Last chance to get all Dan's training at this price: https://www.danoconnortraining.com/storeLatest Video: https://youtu.be/K7GR2gPJ5zY$ - : https://tinyurl.com/300Danoffer   ? : https://tinyurl.com/MCReg1The gaslighter is behaving as though, "I never told you that, Dan. I mean, really." And while they're gaslighting you and trying to throw you onto the bus, they might say things to you such as, "I don't think that's exactly how it. Are you sure you're remembering things correctly? I mean, you know how you are. You know how he is." If they try to pull that type of bullshit with you in front of other people, remember-- we train people how to treat us, so we must put a stop to this behavior and here are a few phrases to help you do that:Phrase number one: I know what I saw. I know what I heard. I know what happened. Now those are three different phrases, but choose one of them and stick to it. And remember the broken record and the, that may be, but the broken record and the, that may be but is one of the most effective, powerful communication tactics of them all and can really save you a lot of time and heartache and it shows such strength when you use it correctly.If somebody, for example, says to something like that-- if somebody says, "Dan, are you sure that you remember things correct?""I know what happened." That is it. Do not explain yourself. Do not defend yourself. "I mean, You can sometimes be forgetful." "That may be, but I know what happened.""Oh, Dan, you are so dramatic.""That may be, but I know what happened."I'm going to give you some more tactics that are a little bit more advanced, and if you are coming home from work, feeling exhausted or feeling sick because of some gas lighter at work. Keep reading. We can all learn to have conversations that create miracles. Remember that a miracle is a shift in perception.And if you perceive me as somebody who's going to allow you to gaslight me and tarnish my reputation and impune my integrity right here in front of all of my peers, I need a miracle to retrain you how to treat me. And before I give you the next one, what are the types of phrases that you have become accustomed to or that you've heard or that you can recognize as gaslighting?Please put that in the comments below, and I'd like to respond to those. And also I'd like you to respond to what I'm saying. What do you think of it? Would you think that your gaslight would simply keep gaslighting? What would you think they would say to it? How would you respond to it? Are you a gas lighter?How would you respond to it, , and how would you respond to the other comments that people are leaving? Please leave your comments and I'd like to really start a discussion about what's going on, because it's not okay. What's going on? You know what I mean? It is not okay that we have suddenly as a society awakened in some type of post-apocalyptic zombie wasteland, where people are being encouraged to and given license to treat each other in the most horrible, loveless, ruthless way that is devoid of any civility and is hurting people every day.That's not okay. So I'd like to start a discussion on it and see what you say about what I'm saying, about what other people are saying, what people have said to you. Please let me know so that we can all talk about it and address this issue. Maybe we should all be going in that direction. Maybe we should all try to compete for the blue ribbon of the ugliest most unenlightened communicator in the office.

    11 min

  7. 10/27/2022

    4-step communication tactic to shut down toxic people--Special Holiday Edition

    $300 OFF Flash Sale CLICK HEREToday you'll learn to use 4 steps to shut down toxic people and stop them from ruining your holidays, and these communication secrets will change your life.Now is your opportunity to recreate your image and transform your relationship with the whole world into a more respectful, loving one without playing any games, taking any crap, or kissing any ass.What do we need to do to make a big change? What we need are principles, tactics, and tools. That's what we need. Those are the three things that will help you achieve whatever your communication goal is. This is perfect for the holiday season because the acronym for this is G I F T: Gratitude, Intention, Fail, Tell.

    28 min
  8. How to develop your professional communication skills fast; a step-by-step guide | Episode 1

    03/08/2022

    How to develop your professional communication skills fast; a step-by-step guide | Episode 1

    In that moment between event and response, when we recognize something as a situation that can have significant consequences in our professional future. Those are the moments where before we speak, we want to stop and have something to reference in terms of, all right, who am I? Why am I here? What do I want? Because what most people do is when we are in a difficult situation or something, that's an emotionally charged situation.It's stressful for some reason. And stressful situations aren't bad. It just signals. Okay, this is going to call for me to dig a little bit deeper. When we find ourselves in those situations, most people think at that moment, OK, what do I want here?And what's in the brain starts to come out of the mouth? That's a huge mistake. Because during those moments when we are emotionally charged, we become drugged and start to think crazy things, and we start to think we are people that we are not. We all know what that's like when we are in our personal relationships when we find ourselves in a heated debate or a heated argument, or we are in an emotionally charged situation. It could be with a sister or a boyfriend or girlfriend or a spouse or a child.We say crazy things and they fly out of our mouth. And in that moment, they seem like the exact right thing to say. This is what I'm thinking. This is what you need to hear. I've always wanted to tell you this, and I'm telling it to you now.And then we have to then go later on and say, I apologize. I don't know what I was thinking. I don't know why I said that. And it's because we were drugged. We were crazy.We think crazy thoughts and we start thinking things like when we're, let's say, dealing with a difficult person, we think someone needs to teach you a lesson. And lucky for you, today is your lucky day. I am just the person to teach you that lesson. I can be nastier than you. I can be Ruder than you.I can show you. We start to think these thoughts or we start to think, I'm going to retreat and just not deal with this at all. But what we want to do is long before these situations happen, we want to create some tools, as I mentioned, to reference so that in the sliver in time between event and response, between what happens and how we respond to it or what we say, or if I sliver in time, we want to be able to stop and think, okay, who did I say I was? Who did I affirm that I was when I was sane and sober. Because when we are emotionally charged, we are neither one of those.

    7 min
See All (18)

4.9
out of 5
23 Ratings

About

How is that that some people seem to know just what to say all the time? Would you like to find out? Or are you surrounded by narcissists, psychopaths, and total d-bags at work and you’re sick of feeling like they ”got you?” Whether you’re just beginning to improve your communication skills, or you’re looking for advanced communication skills training, you’ll learn something new and useful in every episode that will help you find your voice, speak up, stand your ground, and hold your own even when up against the most skilled and powerful communicators. In this podcast, you’ll learn the secrets master communicators use to always seem to have the right words at the right time. Isn’t it time you stepped out of the shadows and spoke? Brought to you by author, keynote speaker, YouTuber, blogger, and the world’s number one tactical communication skills expert Dan O’Connor.

Information

To listen to explicit episodes, sign in.

Stay up to date with this show

Sign in or sign up to follow shows, save episodes, and get the latest updates.
Select a country or region

Africa, Middle East, and India

Asia Pacific

Europe

Latin America and the Caribbean

The United States and Canada