Emotional Balance Sheet with Paul Fenner

Paul Fenner
  • 5.0 (26)
  • SELF-IMPROVEMENT
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

Welcome to the Emotional Balance Sheet, the financial planning podcast for working parents who are building careers and raising kids at the same time. If you and your spouse are both senior-level professionals, raising school-age or college-age kids, and are tired of stitching together four different advisors to run your financial life, this show is built for you. Each episode tackles the planning conversations real families are having: education costs, retirement timing, equity compensation, career transitions, estate coordination, and the emotional weight that sits underneath all of it. Hosted by Paul Fenner, Certified Financial Planner®, Enrolled Agent, and founder of TAMMA Capital. Paul is also a parent to four kids, including a set of triplets, so he knows the pace firsthand. TAMMA Capital is a private family office that brings financial planning, tax, and investments under one umbrella. To schedule a conversation, visit www.tammacapital.com or email pfenner@tammacapital.com.

  1. 1D AGO

    The Financial Story You Keep Telling Yourself

    Have you ever noticed that when things feel uncertain, you already seem to know how it's going to turn out? You're not predicting. You're confirming. In this episode, I explore why the story you're already telling about your financial life shapes every piece of information you take in and how that filter quietly drives some of the most expensive decisions families make. I walk through two real family situations where fear and overconfidence each created blind spots, and why the problem isn't the information available to us. It's what we choose to look at. This week, I'm asking you to name the story you're currently telling about your finances: fear-based or confidence-based. Spend ten minutes with one source that doesn't confirm it. You don't have to change your mind. Just widen the filter. Connect with Paul If you're a family with multiple kids who feel like your money should be working harder but aren't sure where to start, I do complimentary 30-minute financial reviews. Schedule a meeting here. For resources discussed in this episode, visit tammacapital.com/podcast. Follow Paul on LinkedIn. Resources Featured in This Episode: What Game Are You Playing Why Behavior Beats Spreadsheets Places to Hide Aren't Roadblocks

    11 min

  2. MAY 7

    The Scoreboard We Never Chose

    Why do so many people feel financially behind — even when the numbers say they're not? Often, the problem isn't the plan. It's the expectation. Charlie Munger, near the end of his life, gave a one-sentence answer that cuts straight to the point: reasonable expectations. In this conversation, I look at the gap between the life we imagined and the life we're living, and what happens when we never examine where our financial expectations came from in the first place, which may be one of the most underrated financial insights there is. I share the story of a family that had done almost everything right but couldn't shake the feeling of being behind because the scoreboard they were measuring against had been set decades earlier. The action step this week is small but not easy: pick one area where you feel financially behind and ask where that expectation actually came from. Not to fix it. Just to notice it. Because you can't rewrite a story you haven't read yet. Connect with Paul If you're a family with multiple kids who feel like your money should be working harder but aren't sure where to start, I do complimentary 30-minute financial reviews. Schedule a meeting here. For resources discussed in this episode, visit tammacapital.com/podcast. Follow Paul on LinkedIn. Resources Featured in This Episode: Optimize Your Spending to Increase Your Happiness Wealth Planning is For Everyone

    9 min

  3. APR 30

    The Story That Spent Your Money

    Why did a three-minute sideline conversation with another parent almost make me rethink my entire financial plan? This week, I'm digging into why the financial stories we absorb from the people around us, the casual mentions, the social media posts, the dinner table comments, are doing more to shape our decisions than any spreadsheet or data point ever could. I share what I see when families come into my office feeling behind, even though their numbers say otherwise. I talk about how stories hijack our sense of enough and keep moving the goalpost, and why Theresa and I wrestle with the exact same thing. This one is about recognizing whose narrative is actually running your financial life. Your action step: This week, notice one financial story that gets under your skin, a post, a conversation, a comparison, and ask yourself: Is this my story, or someone else's story trying to rewrite my plan? Connect with Paul If you're a family with multiple kids who feel like your money should be working harder but aren't sure where to start, I do complimentary 30-minute financial reviews. Schedule a meeting here. For resources discussed in this episode, visit tammacapital.com/podcast. Follow Paul on LinkedIn. Resources Featured in This Episode: Inflated Expectations: The Hidden Force Undermining Financial Peace Are You Rich Yet? Why Families Still Struggle to Feel Wealthy

    9 min

  4. APR 23

    The Questions We Forget to Ask Ourselves

    How much of what you believe about money, success, and parenting is actually true, and how much is just where and when you happened to grow up? This week's episode digs into the uncomfortable questions we rarely ask ourselves about our own blind spots, and gives you a practical filter to sort values worth protecting from scripts worth questioning. I share stories about the gap between what we think we know and what we've actually experienced. From parents struggling to accept their kids' different paths to the life transitions that revealed how little we understood, this episode is about getting honest with ourselves without getting paralyzed by second-guessing. This week, when you feel a strong "should" about money or your kids, ask yourself: is this my value, or someone else's script? Use the "says who?" test to check whether your certainty is based on what actually matters to your family, or on something you inherited without realizing it. Connect with Paul If you're a family with multiple kids who feel like your money should be working harder but aren't sure where to start, I do complimentary 30-minute financial reviews. Schedule a meeting here. For resources discussed in this episode, visit tammacapital.com/podcast. Follow Paul on LinkedIn. Resources Featured in This Episode: Not All Struggles Are Due to Laziness Why Your Goals Keep Failing Why "Just Waiting" Is Holding You Back in Life and Finance

    12 min

  5. APR 16

    Pessimism Sounds Smart, Optimism Builds Wealth

    Why does bad news feel so convincing while good news feels like a sales pitch? If you've ever caught yourself doom-scrolling financial headlines and then second-guessing your entire plan, you're not alone. In this episode, I explore why pessimism sounds smart, why optimism has been the better long-term bet, and how busy parents can filter out the noise without burying their heads in the sand. I share a story about a client who almost made a fear-driven decision and talk about my own battle with pessimistic thinking. This week's action: notice where your financial anxiety is actually coming from. Is it your own analysis, or someone else's headline? Connect with Paul If you're a family with multiple kids who feel like your money should be working harder but aren't sure where to start, I do complimentary 30-minute financial reviews. Schedule a meeting here. For resources discussed in this episode, visit tammacapital.com/podcast. Follow Paul on LinkedIn. Resources Featured in This Episode: Staying the Course - How Long-Term Investing Builds Wealth Through Market Cycles Parenting and Portfolios: How Life's Chaos Brings Unexpected Calm Wealth Planning is For Everyone

    9 min

  6. APR 9

    What To Do When The Plan Stops Working

    You made the plan. You ran the numbers. You did everything right. So why does it feel like you're one unexpected expense away from starting over? This week, I am focusing on what happens when the plan stops working, and why that might not be the disaster you think it is. I share a story about a family whose perfect five-year projection fell apart after an unexpected health diagnosis, and what they discovered in the rebuilding. I also cover my own experience navigating career changes and raising triplets +1 when plans rarely survive contact with reality. Your action step: Look at your current financial plan and ask yourself what happens when it breaks. What would you protect? What would you let go? That awareness is the beginning of real resilience. Connect with Paul If you're a family with multiple kids who feel like your money should be working harder but aren't sure where to start, I do complimentary 30-minute financial reviews. Schedule a meeting here. For resources discussed in this episode, visit tammacapital.com/podcast. Follow Paul on LinkedIn. Resources Featured in This Episode: Wealth Planning is For Everyone Funded Contentment: Am I Going To Be Okay The Longest Relationship You Will Ever Have

    9 min

  7. APR 2

    The Price and Pressure to Create Perfect Memories

    What happens when the opportunities we give our kids become the pressure we put on ourselves? Dr. Jennifer Dragonette, our resident therapist expert, is back with us to dig into the gap between what we want for our families and what our families actually want. It started with a cruise my triplets didn't enjoy, a conversation with another dad at a basketball game, and an NHL hockey player from our local high school who was the star goalie in the recent winter Olympics. Our conversation focuses on the instinct to provide our kids with opportunities we never had, and how that instinct can quietly turn into pressure on everyone, especially parents. Dr. Jen shares her own stories of loosening the reins on family adventures and learning to ask rather than guess what her kids want. We explore why teenagers pulling away is developmentally normal, why honest answers from our kids are an act of trust, and how reframing our goal from raising teenagers to raising adults changes everything. If you've ever spent money on a vacation and wondered why no one seemed grateful, or felt the weight of the countdown to when your kids leave home, this one's for you. Try asking your kids one question this week: "What would feel really good to you?" And then actually listen. Connect with Paul If you're a family with multiple kids who feel like your money should be working harder but aren't sure where to start, I do complimentary 30-minute financial reviews. Schedule a meeting here. For resources discussed in this episode, visit tammacapital.com/podcast. Follow Paul on LinkedIn. Resources Featured in This Episode: You Can Always Make More Money Why Families Should Stop Waiting for the "Perfect" Time to Travel Why Your Goals Keep Failing

    43 min

  8. MAR 26

    Can We Really Do That?

    What happens when you're doing everything right on paper but still feel one car repair away from a financial meltdown? Or when you're fully present with your kids today but have no idea how you'll pay for college in five years? Most families I work with fall into one of these two camps, and both are fragile in different ways. This week, I'm exploring Morgan Housel's idea that the best way to deal with uncertainty is to save like a pessimist and invest like an optimist. I share stories of two families on opposite ends of this spectrum, why holding both mindsets at once feels so uncomfortable, and what I've learned about building margin without hiding from life. Your action step: Look at your actual situation this week. Do you have real cash reserves sitting accessible? Are you consistently investing for the future? If one piece is missing, that's where your fragility lives. Connect with Paul If you're a family with multiple kids who feel like your money should be working harder but aren't sure where to start, I do complimentary 30-minute financial reviews. Schedule a meeting here. For resources discussed in this episode, visit tammacapital.com/podcast. Follow Paul on LinkedIn. Resources Featured in This Episode: Why "Just Waiting" Is Holding You Back in Life and Finance Finding The Meaningful Moments in Career, Parenting & Life Helping Your Kids Develop Good Money Habits

    10 min
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5
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About

Welcome to the Emotional Balance Sheet, the financial planning podcast for working parents who are building careers and raising kids at the same time. If you and your spouse are both senior-level professionals, raising school-age or college-age kids, and are tired of stitching together four different advisors to run your financial life, this show is built for you. Each episode tackles the planning conversations real families are having: education costs, retirement timing, equity compensation, career transitions, estate coordination, and the emotional weight that sits underneath all of it. Hosted by Paul Fenner, Certified Financial Planner®, Enrolled Agent, and founder of TAMMA Capital. Paul is also a parent to four kids, including a set of triplets, so he knows the pace firsthand. TAMMA Capital is a private family office that brings financial planning, tax, and investments under one umbrella. To schedule a conversation, visit www.tammacapital.com or email pfenner@tammacapital.com.

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