Hope for the Caregiver Truth Network
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- Society & Culture
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With Peter Rosenberger
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Prayers You Won't Hear In Church
Host of the popular podcast Nutshell Sermons, recording artist Bryan Duncan (Grammy and Dove award winner) shares his journey as a caregiver for his wife - and his book,
"Dear God ...Really? Prayers You Won't Hear in Church. -
Caregivers Often Decide For The Whole Unit Not Just One Person
As caregivers, we often must make decisions that benefit the whole unit - not Just one person.
We get into the trap as caregivers where we're thinking of someone almost to the exclusion of everyone else,. I understand why - because that person has extreme needs.
But as a caregiver, YOU are meeting many of those extreme needs. What happens if you don't consider the person meeting the extreme needs?
You must think of the whole unit.
SHOW TRANSCRIPT: (May Contain Typos)
If you feel that you are operating out of guilt or fear or any of those things, what kind of decisions are you going to make?
See, that's the whole point of this program.
I'm not here to give caregiving tips.
We'll have them.
I mean, you can't help but have them.
We're going to talk about it.
We'll swerve into all kinds of things, whether it's, you know, handicap-accessible features or taking up the throw rugs or how to deal with an insurance company, how to deal with doctors.
Yeah, we'll cover all that.
I got that.
Okay.
But how many of us make good decisions when we are gripped with fear, guilt, or obligation?
And how long do you think you can make decisions if you feel obligated to do this, you feel trapped to do this, you feel like this is what you're supposed to do?
How long before that turns into full-blown resentment?
How many of you are already there?
That you're struggling with this right now and you just feel resentful.
And I took a temperature of our Facebook group the other day. In one word, describe how you feel.
And you see the dynamics of what people are dealing with.
They're afraid, they're worn out, they're mad, they're exhausted, depressed.
It's all over the map.
How Many Good Decisions Are Made With Those Kinds Of Feelings?
And then we have to have an anchor point that helps us make good decisions, regardless of what we're feeling or, sometimes, what we're seeing with our very eyes.
What I mean by that is many of us have to look at suffering and we cannot allow that suffering to dictate good decision making.
We have to think clearly.
We have to detach from that somewhat.
They're depending on us to do it.
I mean, think about when you're in a situation when you're hurting; how many good decisions do you make when you've sprained your ankle or broken your leg or fallen and got yourself cut or whatever?
You're kind of almost in panic mode sometimes when you get to that level of trauma.
How many good decisions are you making?
Well, that's the same point that our loved ones have to deal with, and they count on us to do it.
But if we are so paralyzed is a good word, but it's not just paralyzed.
If we're so encumbered by all these other things, whether it be fear, obligation to guilt, resentment, terror, or any of those things, what are you going to do?
Somebody has got to step back away from that and have a clear head.
And if you don't do it as a caregiver for your loved one, who is in line behind you to do it?
So that's our reality.
Somebody has got to keep a cool head.
Now that's hard to do.
And I would suggest to you that you can't do it on your own.
You're going to need help to do this.
And that's why this program is anchored in what Scr -
Sinatra, Cufflinks, and Caregivers
Comedian and long-time Sinatra pal Tommy Dreesen tells a wonderful story about Frank Sinatra and a pair of cufflinks. This story has a powerful lesson for all of us, but particularly for those of us serving as caregivers. This and more from our broadcast on March 9, 2024
“None of this belongs to us, and as soon as we die, someone else is going to get it. It's going to transfer. Somebody will be wearing our stuff, driving our car, living in our home, and living on our land.” - Frank Sinatra -
Without Understanding, Help Remains Elusive
When I launched a caregiver outreach, I established a goal to help provide caregivers with a vocabulary that helped identify their feelings and needs. Without understanding, help remains elusive.
In this bonus segment from our broadcast, I provide two unusual examples of how caregivers feel on any given day. I do this to not only give fellow caregivers that understanding, but those who seek to help them, as well. -
Living, Loving, Laughing, Caregiving
Covering a lot of ground in this episode as I delve into how we choose to view our circumstances as caregivers in light of what Scripture teaches.
www.hopeforthecaregiver.com
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Accepting Reality
For several years, Pat Montague has produced my broadcast, Hope for the Caregiver. I recently talked with her about her own journey as a caregiver.
“I have learned that leaning on the Lord for whatever he has in store is much more comfortable than resisting, fighting, and railing against what I don't like.
I would have not chosen amputation for my husband, I'll be honest. He had other options that he could have taken, but I was astounded when he made that decision.I didn't agree with it at the time. Now I certainly do.
But leaning into the Lord and saying, Father, whatever you have, I will submit myself to it.
Being willing to do that makes a huge difference in how things come out because they're not the same thing.
You can rail and fight, and you're not going to change your perspective.
You're not going to change your circumstances for any amount of money.
And so yielding and just saying, Lord, have your way and help me to accept it have been huge lessons for me.
And it has not come easy because, yes, I've always known I had that part of my personality that I was willing to go toe-to-toe when I knew I was right.”
Customer Reviews
Excellent and Peter is a blessing to know
I met Peter while I was in montana running cows up the road as he was in a vehicle trying too get around them the minute he opened up and spoke he said glorious things it was a blessing I look at things differently than most people I was a range rider up in the forest so I was lucky enough to have more contact during the time spent there . He has helped me get thru my journey and look forward instead of backwards
Excellent podcast and great man and miss you Gracie
A sorely needed resource for caregivers
I haven't learned of any other podcast like Peter's, on the topic of caregiving. Peter himself has been a caregiver for over 30 years, and he knows his stuff. He has a great manner and approachability, which is so important for caregivers when they want to find a community. If you're a caregiver, this is the perfect podcast to listen to.
So comforting!
Wish I could have found this podcast sooner! So thankful for you!