305: Think Big with Claire Hauxwell

When you move abroad as an accompanying spouse, you spend a lot of time and energy trying to fit in with people who don’t understand you. Giving up your career, not recognizing yourself anymore, overcompensating by baking cupcakes from scratch because grocery store ones just won’t do, dot dot dot.

And you can try and explain what it’s like until you’re blue in the face, telling your story to the most empathetic person on the planet. But in the end, it takes one to know one, and if you’re an accompanying spouse, my guest this week will take the words right out of your mouth.

It’s my pleasure to welcome back life coach, entrepreneur, author, and member of Global Coach Coalition, Claire Hauxwell. You might remember Claire from EP172 where we discussed Party Fouls.  

Claire calls herself a Professional BadASS — the capital “ASS” stands for “Accompanying Supportive Spouse.” For the globally mobile, that’s a creative way to reference people who move abroad with a partner on assignment.

Often giving up their own career, the so-called “trailing spouse” can feel unseen, undervalued, and suffers a quiet self-erosion. This happens while the rest of the world regards their life abroad as adventurous and carefree — which, even when true, doesn’t negate a desire for purpose.

Claire first became an accompanying spouse in 2009. 14 years later, Claire has five international moves under her belt. Today, Claire returns to share updates on her journey, including a new book where she uses her experience to help other accompanying spouses think big.

What You’ll Learn in this Episode:

• Busy but unsatisfied
• Misunderstanding ungratefulness
• Coaching session morning sickness
• Letting go of other people’s opinions
• Wearing jeans that never break-in

Listen to the Full Episode:

Featured on the Show:

What will you and I talk about when you come on this podcast to share YOUR success story? In Global Coach Coalition, we THINK BIG, together. So if you’re done playing small, then join our upcoming class right here. 

• Sundae’s Website
• Sundae’s Facebook Business Page – Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC
• Sundae Bean – YouTube
• Adapt and Succeed
• IN TRANSIT Hub
• Global Coach Coalition
• Quiz: Which Phase of Transformation Are You In?
• 2023 Ambition Compass Challenge
• BadASS Abroad: How to Get Your Expat Shift Together
• Year of Transformation with Sundae
• FIGT
• Claire Hauxwell

Catch These Podcasts / Articles:

• EP190: Scale of Wholeness
• EP301: The Crumble
• EP302: Infinite Possibilities
• EP303: Fight Mode
• EP304: Triumph In Transit

Who doesn’t love reruns? Well, here comes the Timeless Series. For the next three months, we’ll revive the most evergreen and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles from our archives. And while you quench your thirst for empowering content in Q2, we’re working behind-the-scenes to return with a vengeance for Q3! Thank you for your continued support during these shapeshifting times.

We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global Best 30 Expat Podcasts!

Subscribe: iTunes | Android

Full Episode Transcript:

Download Transcript

Hello, it is 4 a.m. in New York, 10 a.m. in Johannesburg, and 4 p.m. in Bangkok. Welcome to IN TRANSIT with Sundae Bean. I’m an intercultural strategist, transformation facilitator, and solution-oriented coach. And I am on a mission to help you adapt and succeed through ANY life transition. 

I’m going to pick a caption from a book that will be featured in today’s episode and see if you’ve ever felt this, “Is ‘Done’ an emotion because I feel that in my soul.” Now, if you’re feeling, “Done,” right now, then you want to check out the rest of this episode with Claire Hauxwell because she can help us go from that feeling of absolutely done to living a life where you have your shift together. Claire, welcome to IN TRANSIT. 

Claire: Thanks, Sundae for having me. I’m excited to be here. 

Sundae: Claire you’ve been at this before, where you helped us and some of the things you shouldn’t say to an expat partner, that was our Party Foul episode. And now I’m having you back on after a huge transformation in your own life. Let me tell people about you before we dive in Claire Hauxwell is what she calls a Professional BadASS and that means Capital ASS: Accompanying Supportive Spouse. For those of you who are not living a globally mobile life, that’s another way, a very creative way to talk about those people who are joining their partner as you move abroad. Or living a mobile life to support your family in the job transitions. With nearly 14 years of experience, Claire has figured out living life abroad. She has five international moves under her belt. And she’s really learned how to embrace all things about living an unbounded and global lifestyle, and what it throws at you. 

What’s great about her, is her life because of how mobile it’s been globally, helps her understand in a really deep way, living life in transition. Claire’s originally from Michigan and has been relocating both internationally and domestically for many many years. Claire is also a certified life coach. She works with those to gain confidence, shift their mindset, and create a fulfilling and intentional life at home and abroad. And she is the author of the book, BadASS Abroad: How to Get Your Expat Shift Together. It is relatable, it is funny, and it’s part memoir, part guidebook on a life-changing journey. And Claire has been so kind to share some of her journey with you today. So Claire, thank you for joining us. How long have we known each other? 

Claire: We met in 2018 at FIGT , I think.

Sundae: Can you tell me a little bit about– give us a glimpse of where your life was at then. 

Claire: When I went to FIGT that year, I turned 40 that year and well I had turned 40 the year before but it was in my 40th year and I was trying to like figure out what I do now. My kids are getting a bit older. Nobody really needs me here. I have all this time on my hands. I’m busy, but I’m not loving anything that I do. And I was writing but I didn’t do anything with my writing and I was spending all my time giving all my energy to other people. And when I went to this conference, which was kind of like a precipice, which is funny because I think I met you and I was like, “Whoa, she seems like super bubbly.” I don’t know how, I don’t know if we knew each other just from online. 

Sundae: Yep, South African connection. 

Claire: Yeah, expat life is a small world. But I had gotten to this point in my life where I was like, “What the hell is going on?” What are you doing with your life here? Because like everything’s going on around you and you’re just kind of existing.” 

Sundae: Well, I can imagine a lot of people can relate to that right now, right? 

Claire: Yeah. And I think this was obviously pre-COVID where a lot of things are like now, we’re still existing in a different world today. But back then, I was just like, “I have to be the perfect mom. I have to be the perfect wife. I’ve got to make sure everything looks perfect on the outside. And I have to help and have to…” Well, I didn’t need to do all those things and I was so busy. What but I wasn’t doing things that I loved anymore. I mean, I loved parenting and I loved being a wife but it wasn’t fulfilling me. I had