If there were ever a sentence in the Bible to serve as a trigger for anger, resentment, and resistance towards the Bible it is most likely Ephesians 5:22, “Wives, subject yourselves to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” The reason some women bristle at verses like Ephesians 5:22-24 is because they have not known the kind of love husbands are called to demonstrate in verse 25, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her...” Before we can even begin to address these verses, I need you to hear something. Marriage is an institution created by God to be celebrated, enjoyed, protected, and fought for within the covenant relationship between God and one man and one woman for a lifetime. However, if marriage (as God’s good gift) is something that you have made into the ultimate thing for your life, then you have potentially done two things: You have set your bar way too low. You have made an idol out of the institution of marriage. When it comes to marriage, how can you set the bar way too low by making it the ultimate thing you aspire to? By making marriage the ultimate thing, you miss its ultimate purpose in that it serves as the only institution on earth designed to reflect Christ’s relationship with the Church and the Church’s relationship with Christ (v. 32). What is marriage? It is a “great mystery” because it is, “an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one” (v. 32; NLT). In fact, in reference to the mystery of marriage, the ESV, NIV, and CSB translate the Greek word megas (μέγας) as “profound” while the KJV, NASB, and NLT use the word “great.” The word can also be translated: large, surprising, or prominent. What is the point? Marriage is a big deal for reasons much more significant than two humans who want to spend a lifetime together. When you read what is written in Ephesians 5 concerning marriage, you must read and study these verses within the context of everything written in Ephesians 1:1 - 5:21. Let me help you understand Ephesians 5:22-33 in light of the overall context of the epistle: In Ephesians 1:1-19, the Christian was chosen before the foundation of the world to be redeemed and forgiven of all sin exclusively through the shed blood of Jesus upon a cross. If you are a Christian, at the moment you believed in Jesus, you were sealed by the Holy Spirit for the purpose of becoming holy and blameless as God’s treasured possession to the praise of His glory, so that Jesus, who is Lord over everything (vv. 19b-21), would be head over all things to the church (v. 22-23). In Christ, those who were dead in their sins are made alive according to Ephesians 2:1-10 because of the rich mercy, great love, and sufficient grace of God. The reason why you, Christian, were made alive... is to live out your calling as God’s, “workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them” (2:1-10). Now that you are alive with Christ, you are a citizen “with the saints, and are of God’s household, having been built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus Himself being the cornerstone, in whom the whole building, being fitted together, is growing into a holy temple in the Lord...” (2:19-21). Because you are in Jesus, you now have a new identity, and as His redeemed people, we all can, “know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge” as His Church (3:14-19). As those who were once far off but have been brought near as Jesus’ redeemed people, we are to be known for walking a better way as followers of Jesus, indeed, we are to “walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called...” (4:1). We do this, “with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, being diligent to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (vv. 2-3). As