Recalibrating Our Attachment Template: Incarnation To Birth

Our attachment template primarily determines how we relate to ourselves, others, and the world, and to recalibrate it, we need to work where it was formed: from incarnation, conception, in our Mother’s womb, to birth and our first year. 

Our attachment template is formed by the time we get to about 1. Key events, memories, and ways of relating usually compound that template, meaning that patterns of relating keep repeating over time.

This leads to the development of what we might think is personality when it’s actually adaptive traits that keep repeating because they are trying to protect us from further pain. And because they were formed so early, these traits often feel like ‘that’s just who I am’.

When we identify these themes and patterns in our lives, we can also trace them into our Soul’s Journey and work with the whole root system of our consciousness. This all needs attending to to recalibrate our attachment template.

Whilst most of us won’t have a conscious memory of this very early and primal time in our lives, it is accessible once we are tuned in enough to our body and internal world. Everyone I have worked with can access this, we don’t need to be ‘spiritual’ – whatever that means! 

This is also not a solely cognitive process. Deep remembering comes from the body, the mind, and the soul, which can all be accessed through the body, our six senses, and by slightly altering our state of consciousness, which we all can do. 

I also find that doing this helps us to realise that babies aren’t born pure and open. By the time we are born, our sense of self has been developing for 9 months, the attachment template is formed, and we are bringing in themes from our Soul to resolve and reconcile.

My last caveat is I don’t channel anything for anyone when work – this is really important, as we do need a direct and embodied connection with what we remember, otherwise it doesn’t truly ‘land’ in our system and thus doesn’t actually recalibrate our state of being.

During the episode, I talk through the potential of remembering and recalibrating at the following key stages of coming into this life:

• Incarnation
• Conception
• Gestation
• Birth
• First Year

I want to remind and inspire those who are listening that it is possible to process pain that felt previously unbearable, once we are resourced and stable enough, we can remember, and we can unwind the adaptions in our system and come home to ourselves.

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Melanie Swan is regarded as a leader in healing the physical womb, restoring the metaphysical womb, and connecting with the cosmic womb.

She’s a Womb Medicine Woman and Soul Worker with 20 year’s experience – who guides and empowers women to come home to their true nature.

She hosts The Sacred Womb Podcast and runs The Womb Healing Training, and is currently writing her first book The Sacred Womb, which is, at its core, a handbook for the empowerment of womankind; due for release in late 2025.