Refamulating

Feelings & Co
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Refamulating

Refamulating is a podcast that celebrates different ways to make a family. A generation ago, most Americans were guided by the idea of the nuclear family: a mom, a dad, two kids, and a derpy dog. Many still have a family like this, and that’s great! But the numbers show it doesn't represent the majority of American households. In fact, there is no one-size-fits-all for what a family should look like. We’re collectively reformulating our understanding of what makes a family in today’s world. We call this refamulating, and this show invites us to understand it one story at a time. On each episode of Refamulating, host Julia Winston delivers emotionally honest stories of real people with nuanced experiences that census data could never tell us. Think queer parents, egg and sperm donors, surrogates, blended families, child-free folks, tales of communal living, and much more.

  1. قبل ٤ أيام

    15 I Family Preservation in Foster Care: Building a bridge between two families through radical compassion

    Aaliyah and Jamyla have three moms - their birth mother Nicole, their foster mom (soon to be adopted mom) Chalice, and Chalice's fiancée Rachel. Chalice and the girls met eight years ago when the girls needed a foster parent. In the eight years they’ve known each other, Aaliyah and Jamyla have learned how hearts can expand to love many parents in their blended family.  _ The episode transcript can be found here.  _ Subscribe to our newsletter for more refamulating! We write about how refamulating looks in our lives, share resources we’re using as we make this show and share special bonus content for paid subscribers. _ Connect with us:  EMAIL: hello@refamulating.com.  WEBSITE INSTAGRAM TIK TOK _ Our team  Host: Julia Winston Producer: Claire McInerny  Manager of Engagement: Grace Barry Audio Engineer: Josh Gilbert Theme Music: Luke Top – We are a member of the Feelings and Co network.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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    REFAM CHAT: Recognizing All Of Our Milestones

    Something we’ve realized while working on this project is that the nuclear family has infiltrated so much of our lives. (For example, housing in America is designed for a single, nuclear family.) Another example of that is what we consider milestones in our life. Think about it- the list of big milestones in our lives is fairly short: graduations, getting married, and having a kid. These are the events where we throw parties, send gifts, and put in a lot of effort to celebrate a loved one as they reach this milestone. Two of those three major examples have to do with creating a family in the traditional way. But what if you’re single or choose not to have children? It can feel like you may never be celebrated as an adult if you don’t hit those particular milestones. That’s something both Julia and Claire have thought about at different points in their lives, which is why we wanted to talk about it on this month’s Refam Chat. __ Subscribe to our Substack for more refamulating! Paid subscribers can access the video version of our Refam Chats. _ Connect with us:  EMAIL: hello@refamulating.com.  WEBSITE INSTAGRAM TIK TOK Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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    14 I The Single Greatest Choice: Embracing solo motherhood

    Katie Bryan grew up in a nuclear family in Texas, and always dreamed her future family would include a doting husband, a beautiful house in the suburbs, and of course, children. She spent almost 20 years searching for the right partner so she could make this dream come true, but at 39 she was still single and child-free. That’s when she realized she didn’t have to wait for a husband, she could have a baby on her own. In this episode Katie shares her emotional journey of releasing the idea of what a family should look like, and building the family of her dreams.  Learn more about solo motherhood by choice at Katie's website. Listen to Katie’s podcast, The Single Greatest Choice. _ The episode transcript can be found here.  _ Subscribe to our Substack for more refamulating! We write about how refamulating looks in our lives, share resources we’re using as we make this show and share special bonus content for paid subscribers. _ Connect with us:  EMAIL: hello@refamulating.com.  WEBSITE INSTAGRAM TIK TOK _ Our team  Host: Julia Winston Producer: Claire McInerny  Manager of Engagement: Grace Barry Audio Engineer: Josh Gilbert Theme Music: Luke Top – We are a member of the Feelings and Co network.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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    REFAM CHAT: The name dilemma

    A lot of us refamulating have faced a similar challenge: as we choose a new path or carve out a different role in a family, we realize there is no name for us. A step-parent wants a more warm and loving name. An egg or sperm donor with an emotional tie to the family doesn’t want to be referred to by this clinical title. Or maybe a close friend plays an important role to your kids but isn’t technically an aunt or uncle. On this Refam Chat, Julia and Claire talk about their own struggle with names, and read some of the names you all shared with us on Instagram for your unique family roles. A video version of this episode is available for paid subscribers to our Substack. - Join us for this month’s ReFamily Dinner, where we’re talking about navigating dysfunctional family dynamics. Our guest is therapist, writer and podcaster Whitney Goodman (@sitwithwhit). Come with questions for Whitney about estrangement and the holiday season, boundary setting, disappointment in family, accepting family, in-law relationships, politics, or anything else! This is a free, virtual event on Dec 3. Sign up here!! _ Connect with us:  EMAIL: hello@refamulating.com.  WEBSITE INSTAGRAM TIK TOK _ Subscribe to our Substack for more refamulating! We write about how refamulating looks in our lives, share resources we’re using as we make this show and share special bonus content for paid subscribers. _ Our team  Host: Julia Winston Producer: Claire McInerny  Manager of Engagement: Grace Barry Audio Engineer: Josh Gilbert Theme Music: Luke Top – We are a member of the Feelings and Co network.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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    13 I Don’t Tell Mom: Grieving the “living death” of family estrangement

    When Emily was a child, a family member abused her and told her to keep it a secret. She kept that secret until she was 34, but her family didn’t react well once she told the truth. Eventually Emily chose to stop talking to them, and in this episode she explains her choice to be estranged from her family and why estrangement has been important for her healing. - Join us for this month’s ReFamily Dinner, where we’re talking about navigating dysfunctional family dynamics. Our guest is therapist, writer and podcaster Whitney Goodman (@sitwithwhit). Come with questions for Whitney about estrangement and the holiday season, boundary setting, disappointment in family, accepting family, in-law relationships, politics, or anything else! This is a free, virtual event on Dec 3. Sign up here!! _ The episode transcript can be found here.  _ Connect with us:  EMAIL: hello@refamulating.com.  WEBSITE INSTAGRAM TIK TOK _ Subscribe to our Substack for more refamulating! We write about how refamulating looks in our lives, share resources we’re using as we make this show and share special bonus content for paid subscribers. _ Our team  Host: Julia Winston Producer: Claire McInerny  Manager of Engagement: Grace Barry Audio Engineer: Josh Gilbert Theme Music: Luke Top – We are a member of the Feelings and Co network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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  6. ١٠‏/٠٥‏/١٤٤٦ هـ

    12 I Reframing The American Dream (Pt 2): Communal Living Makes a Family

    Show Notes: What happens when you expand beyond the nuclear family home? In this episode, we meet people who've chosen to share their daily lives with others in unconventional ways - from two married couples buying a house together to raise kids, to a man who's spent 14 years living on a hippie commune. Their stories challenge our assumptions about what makes a successful adult and show how living communally might be an antidote to America's epidemic of loneliness. Additional Resources:  "Everyday Utopia" by Kristen Ghodsee Learn more about Twin Oaks in Virginia Learn more about The Radish in Oakland  – Every month, we host ReFamily Dinner, a virtual event that connects our audience with someone who has refamulated. The guest talks about their experience and answers your questions. This month’s dinner is a conversation on communal living with Lily Lamboy and her husband Alex Savtchenko. Lily & Alex own and operate Ryza, a community home in Berkeley which they share with six friends. Sign up for this month's event here, and join us Nov. 13 from 8-9:30 p.m. EST.  _ The episode transcript is here.  – Connect with us:  EMAIL: hello@refamulating.com.  WEBSITE INSTAGRAM TIK TOK _ Subscribe to our Substack for more refamulating! We write about how refamulating looks in our lives, share resources we’re using as we make this show and share special bonus content for paid subscribers. _ Our team  Host: Julia Winston Producer: Claire McInerny  Manager of Engagement: Grace Barry Audio Engineer: Josh Gilbert Theme Music: Luke Top – We are a member of the Feelings and Co network. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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    11 I Reframing The American Dream (Pt 1)

    The nuclear family has been held up as the ideal for generations, but it's actually a relatively recent invention. From college dorms to pandemic pods, some of our happiest moments come from living in community with others. So why do Americans cling to independence as a marker of success? In our Season 2 premiere, we explore how our individualistic lifestyle developed, what it's costing us, and how reimagining family structures could create a more connected future. Our guest is Dr. Kristen Ghodsee, professor of Russian and Eastern European Studies at the University of Pennsylvania and author of Everyday Utopia: What 2,000 Years of Wild Experiments Can Teach Us About the Good Life. _ Every month, we host ReFamily Dinner, a virtual event that connects our audience with someone who has refamulated. The guest talks about their experience and answers your questions. This month’s dinner is a conversation on communal living with Lily Lamboy and her husband Alex Savtchenko. Lily & Alex own and operate Ryza, a community home in Berkeley which they share with six friends. Sign up for this month's event here, and join us Nov. 13 from 8-9:30 p.m. EST.  _ Referenced in this Episode: "Everyday Utopia" by Kristen Ghodsee  "Homeward Bound" by Elaine Tyler May "The Nuclear Family Was a Mistake" by David Brooks in The Atlantic U.S. Surgeon General's report: "Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation (2023) Johnson County city bans co-living with four or more people _ The episode transcript can be found here. _ Connect with us:  EMAIL: hello@refamulating.com.  WEBSITE INSTAGRAM TIK TOK _ Subscribe to our Substack for more refamulating! We write about how refamulating looks in our lives, share resources we’re using as we make this show and share special bonus content for paid subscribers. _ Our team  Host: Julia Winston Producer: Claire McInerny  Manager of Engagement: Grace Barry Audio Engineer: Josh Gilbert Theme Music: Luke Top – We are a member of the Feelings and Co network.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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  8. ٠٣‏/٠٥‏/١٤٤٦ هـ

    REFAM CHAT: Love is in the air + Sister Wives

    Before season 2 officially starts Tuesday, Nov 12, Julia and Claire chat about a few things: Julia is officially a Fairy Godmother and shares an update (the twins are born! she's held them!) Claire is getting married, which has brought up a lot of refamulating feelings. And then we have a special segment where Claire, a reality TV junkie, makes Julia, a reality TV virgin, watch an episode of Sister Wives and talk about how they are refamulating. Listen to the season 2 trailer now! There's a video and ad-free version of this episode on our Substack. While you're there, subscribe to get more refamulating! -- Connect with us:  EMAIL: hello@refamulating.com.  WEBSITE INSTAGRAM TIK TOK _ Our team  Host: Julia Winston Producer: Claire McInerny  Manager of Engagement: Grace Barry Audio Engineer: Josh Gilbert Theme Music: Luke Top – We are a member of the Feelings and Co network.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Refamulating is a podcast that celebrates different ways to make a family. A generation ago, most Americans were guided by the idea of the nuclear family: a mom, a dad, two kids, and a derpy dog. Many still have a family like this, and that’s great! But the numbers show it doesn't represent the majority of American households. In fact, there is no one-size-fits-all for what a family should look like. We’re collectively reformulating our understanding of what makes a family in today’s world. We call this refamulating, and this show invites us to understand it one story at a time. On each episode of Refamulating, host Julia Winston delivers emotionally honest stories of real people with nuanced experiences that census data could never tell us. Think queer parents, egg and sperm donors, surrogates, blended families, child-free folks, tales of communal living, and much more.

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    Feelings & Co
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    Refamulating

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