The Hardcore Self Help Podcast with Duff the Psych

Robert Duff, Ph.D.
The Hardcore Self Help Podcast with Duff the Psych

This is a podcast dedicated to answering your questions about mental health, anxiety, depression, relationships, sex, and life WITHOUT psychobabble BS. I am Dr. Robert Duff, a psychologist from Southern California, but I'm also a regular dude who legitimately wants to help out. I wrote the best selling books Hardcore Self Help: F**k Depression and Hardcore Self Help: F**K Anxiety. Those are available at http://hardcoreselfhelp.com

  1. -1 J

    425: My Word for 2025!

    In today’s year-end wrap-up episode of the Hardcore Self Help Podcast (Episode 425), I reflect on 2024 and reveal my guiding word for 2025. Instead of traditional New Year’s resolutions, I choose a single word each year to serve as a focal point and inspiration. I revisit last year’s word—Connection—and discuss what worked well, like strengthening family bonds and growing professionally through clinical supervision and podcast interviews, as well as what didn’t go as planned (like making new friends or achieving full Spanish fluency). These reflections highlight how intentions can guide growth in unexpected ways. Looking ahead to 2025, my new word is Mend. From addressing health issues to repairing lingering logistical and financial tasks, I want to focus on making what I already have stronger and more sustainable, rather than building from scratch. This year’s theme is about restoring, improving, and taking care of what’s important in my personal life, home, and professional endeavors—including the podcast and Duff the Psych projects. Join me as I wrap up 2024, share my aspirations for 2025, and encourage you to reflect on your own values, accomplishments, and future direction. Thank you for another year of support and attention. I’ll see you in 2025! Chapters: 00:00 — Reflecting on Another Year: Gratitude & Long-Term Listeners 01:00 — Beyond Resolutions: Choosing a Guiding Word Each Year 03:00 — Reviewing 2024’s Word “Connection”: Wins, Misses & Insights 05:00 — Personal Highlights: Family Bonding, Board Games & Quality Time 09:00 — Professional Growth: Clinical Supervision, Networking & Interviews 11:00 — Language Ambitions: Progress in Spanish, But Not Fluent Yet 13:00 — Introducing 2025’s Word: “Mend” 14:00 — Repairing & Improving: Health, Home Projects & Finances 16:00 — Podcast & Brand Updates: Refining Instead of Expanding 18:00 — Final Thoughts: Entering 2025 with Intention & Flexibility About the Podcast I’m Dr. Robert Duff, a clinical psychologist aiming to make mental health more accessible. On the Hardcore Self Help Podcast, I break down complex psychological concepts, share actionable tips, and provide relatable advice to help you live a healthier, more fulfilled life. Whether through solo episodes, interviews, or listener Q&A, my goal is to support your mental well-being without unnecessary jargon. Connect With Me: Website: https://www.duffthepsych.com/ Contact: https://www.duffthepsych.com/contact Email: duffthepsych@gmail.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/duffthepsych/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/DuffThePsych #MentalHealth #SelfHelp #PersonalDevelopment #Mindfulness #NewYear #Goals #Intention #Reflection #Podcast

    19 min
  2. -6 J

    424: Antidepressants are Making me WORSE & Stress is Waking Me Up Early

    In this solo Q&A episode of the Hardcore Self Help Podcast (Episode 424), I tackle two listener questions that address challenging mental health scenarios. The first question delves into the concept of antidepressant-associated chronic irritable dysphoria (ACID), a proposed condition rather than a formally recognized diagnosis, and the potential long-term effects of antidepressants in the context of bipolar disorder. I break down the limited research behind ACID, emphasize the importance of comprehensive care, and acknowledge the frustration that can arise when medications seem to worsen symptoms instead of helping. The second question focuses on waking up early with irritability and racing thoughts. I provide practical strategies like pre-bed journaling to offload worries, identifying actionable steps for lingering concerns, and creating a calming buffer before sleep. I also discuss the importance of reexamining one’s work environment, considering meaningful changes, and finding fulfillment outside of a stressful job. Throughout the episode, I offer insights on self-advocacy, exploring alternative treatments, and laying the groundwork to regain a sense of control in your daily life. Chapters: 00:15 — Introduction: Needing More Questions & Holiday Scheduling 02:00 — ACID Explained: A Proposed Condition, Not a Formal Diagnosis 08:00 — Bipolar Disorder & Antidepressants: Complex Interactions and Research Gaps 11:00 — Frustration with Care: Inadequate Guidance and Long-Term Medication Issues 14:00 — Exploring Alternatives: Therapy, Lifestyle Changes, and Treatments Like TMS/Ketamine 21:00 — Morning Irritability: Unpacking Workplace Stress & Uncontrollable Factors 24:00 — Reevaluating Work: Finding Meaning Outside Employment and Considering Changes 27:00 — Pre-Bed Journaling: Offloading Worries, Identifying Action Steps, and Creating Buffers 30:00 — Final Thoughts: Gratitude, Year-End Plans, and Continuing the Journey About the Podcast I’m Dr. Robert Duff, a clinical psychologist and the host of the Hardcore Self Help Podcast. I’m here to demystify mental health, break down psychological concepts, and provide actionable advice without unnecessary jargon. Through expert interviews, listener Q&A, and relatable discussions, this podcast aims to help you live a healthier, more fulfilled life. Connect With Me: Website: https://www.duffthepsych.com/ Contact: https://www.duffthepsych.com/contact Email: duffthepsych@gmail.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/duffthepsych/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/DuffThePsych #MentalHealth #Antidepressants #Bipolar #WorkStress #Journaling #SleepHygiene #QandA #SelfHelp #Psychology

    31 min
  3. 6 DÉC.

    423: Neurodiversity Playbook with Dr. Matt Zakreski

    In today’s episode of the Hardcore Self Help Podcast, I sit down with psychologist, professional speaker, and author Dr. Matt Zakreski to explore the concept of neurodiversity and how to create a more supportive world for neurodivergent individuals. Drawing from both personal and professional experiences, Dr. Matt shares his journey as someone who is gifted and ADHD, and how that shaped his understanding and advocacy for neurodivergent folks. We discuss what neurodiversity truly means, highlight differences between neurotypical and neurodivergent brains, and break down why it’s crucial to avoid framing neurodivergent individuals as “failed neurotypicals.” Dr. Matt provides practical strategies for understanding executive functioning challenges, improving communication, and fostering more inclusive environments both in schools and in everyday life. Whether you’re neurodivergent yourself, raising a neurodivergent child, or simply looking to become a better ally, this episode is packed with insights and guidance to help you understand, accept, and celebrate neurological differences. Chapters: 00:15 — Introduction: Send in Your Questions & Introducing Dr. Matt Zakreski 02:00 — Defining Neurodiversity and Neurodivergence 08:00 — The Performance Cliff: When School Outpaces Natural Ability 11:00 — Common Threads: Executive Functioning and Pragmatic Language in Neurodivergence 17:00 — Brain-Based Differences: Sensory Input, Basal Ganglia, and Emotional Intensity 21:00 — Universal Design in Education: Creating Systems That Work for All 24:00 — Shame, Emotionality, and the Reality of ADHD 28:00 — Inattentive vs. Hyperactive: Recognizing Subtle Signs and Misdiagnoses 33:00 — Rethinking Assessment: Moving Beyond DSM Checklists 38:00 — Why Specialists and Relationships Matter in Mental Health Care 41:00 — Making Therapy Work for Kids: Meeting Them Where They Are 43:00 — The Neurodiversity Playbook: Tools, Strategies, and Action Points 48:00 — Intention vs. Impact: Communicating Clearly and Compassionately 52:00 — Practical Tips for Executive Functioning in Daily Life 54:00 — Final Takeaways: Building Community and Embracing Your Unique Brain About the Podcast I’m Dr. Robert Duff, a clinical psychologist and the host of the Hardcore Self Help Podcast. My mission is to break down complex mental health topics into approachable, actionable advice. Each episode dives deep into mental health, personal development, and practical strategies for thriving. Whether through expert interviews, audience Q&A, or practical tips, this show is all about making meaningful changes without unnecessary jargon or fluff. Guest Links: The Neurodiversity Playbook by Dr. Matt Zakreski: https://www.drmattzakreski.com/the-neurodiversity-playbook Dr. Matt Zakreski’s Website: https://www.drmattzakreski.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drmattzakreski/ Connect With Me: Website: https://www.duffthepsych.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/duffthepsych/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/DuffThePsych #Neurodiversity #ADHD #Gifted #TwiceExceptional #Autism #ExecutiveFunction #InclusiveEducation #MentalHealth #SelfHelp #PersonalDevelopment

    57 min
  4. 22 NOV.

    422: Charles Duhigg on Becoming a Supercommunicator

    In today's episode of the Hardcore Self Help Podcast, I sit down with Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist and best-selling author Charles Duhigg to explore the science of effective communication and its profound impact on our personal and professional lives. Charles shares insights from his latest book, Supercommunicators: Unlock the Secret Language of Connection, delving into how skills like empathy, active listening, and understanding different types of conversations can transform the way we connect with others. Our conversation uncovers the neurological underpinnings of communication, including the concept of neural entrainment and the matching principle. We discuss practical strategies for improving communication in various contexts—from personal relationships to the workplace—and address common pitfalls people face, such as social anxiety and miscommunication. Whether you're looking to enhance your relationships, become a better listener, or navigate tough conversations with ease, this episode is packed with valuable insights to help you on your journey. Chapters: 00:15 — Introduction: Meet Charles Duhigg 03:00 — From Business to Journalism: Charles's Unconventional Path 08:00 — The Power of Storytelling in Communication 11:45 — Understanding the Science Behind Effective Communication 14:00 — The Three Types of Conversations: Practical, Emotional, Social 17:00 — The Matching Principle: Aligning Conversations for Connection 21:00 — Diagnosing and Matching Conversation Types 24:00 — Looping for Understanding: A Technique for Better Listening 28:00 — Common Communication Mistakes and How to Avoid Them 31:00 — Empathy Without Mimicry: Connecting Without Oversharing 34:00 — Real-World Examples: Doctors, Therapists, and Effective Communication 38:00 — Advice for Introverts and Those with Social Anxiety 44:00 — The Power of Asking Questions in Social Settings 47:00 — Overview of 'Supercommunicators' and Its Practical Applications 51:00 — Navigating Tough Conversations: Tips and Strategies 54:00 — A Challenge for Listeners: Reconnecting with Someone 57:30 — Closing Thoughts and Where to Find Charles's Work Hope you find this enlightening conversation as engaging as I did! Feel free to share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below. About the Podcast I'm Dr. Robert Duff, a clinical psychologist and the host of the Hardcore Self Help Podcast. My mission is to break down complex mental health topics into relatable, actionable advice. On this podcast, we dive deep into mental health, personal development, and the strategies that help us thrive. Each episode is a mix of expert interviews, practical tips, and answers to listener questions, all aimed at helping you live a healthier, more fulfilled life. Guest Links: Charles's Latest Book: Supercommunicators: Unlock the Secret Language of Connection — https://www.amazon.com/Supercommunicators-Unlock-Secret-Language-Connection/dp/0593243919 Website: CharlesDuhigg.com — https://www.charlesduhigg.com/ Twitter: @cduhigg — https://twitter.com/cduhigg Connect With Me: Website: duffthepsych.com — https://www.duffthepsych.com/ Instagram: @duffthepsych — https://www.instagram.com/duffthepsych/ YouTube: Dr. Duff's Channel — https://www.youtube.com/c/DuffThePsych #MentalHealth #EffectiveCommunication #CharlesDuhigg #SelfHelp #Supercommunicators #PersonalDevelopment #ListeningSkills #SocialAnxiety

    58 min
  5. 15 NOV.

    421: Grieving your Therapist & Non-Suicidal Self-Injury

    In this Q&A episode of the Hardcore Self Help Podcast, I address two insightful listener questions. The first explores coping with the end of a therapeutic relationship, while the second delves into the physical manifestations of depression and strategies to manage them. This episode offers practical advice and empathetic understanding for those navigating these challenges. Chapters: 00:15 — Introduction: Returning to Q&A After a series of interviews, I return to answering your questions. Learn how to submit your own and connect with the podcast. 02:05 — Coping with the End of Therapy A listener shares the grief experienced after concluding therapy with a transformative therapist. I discuss why these feelings are normal, the concept of transference, and practical ways to navigate the loss of such a significant relationship. 12:15 — Understanding the Physical Symptoms of Depression Addressing a listener's concern about the often-overlooked physical manifestations of depression, including fatigue, dissociation, and the role of self-injury as a coping mechanism. I explore what these symptoms can look like, why they occur, and practical tools to help reconnect with the body and manage the emotional weight. 24:00 — Final Thoughts and Encouragement Reflecting on the courage it takes to share these challenges and offering guidance on taking small steps toward healing. About the Podcast I’m Dr. Robert Duff, a clinical psychologist and the host of the Hardcore Self Help Podcast. My mission is to break down complex mental health topics into relatable, actionable advice. Each episode combines expert insights, practical tips, and answers to listener questions, all aimed at helping you live a healthier, more fulfilled life. Connect With Me: Website: duffthepsych.com Instagram: @duffthepsych YouTube: youtube.com/duffthepsych Mentioned in This Episode: Book: Skin Game: A Memoir by Caroline Kettlewell. This memoir provides a vivid account of living with and overcoming self-injury. Available on Amazon: I hope you find this episode insightful and supportive. If you'd like to send me a question for a future episode, please email me at duffthepsych@gmail.com.

    26 min
  6. 8 NOV.

    420: Productive Failure with Dr. Manu Kapur

    In today’s episode, I sit down with Dr. Manu Kapur, a professor of learning sciences, to delve into his unique approach to education: productive failure. Dr. Kapur explains how intentionally designing failure within the learning process can lead to deeper understanding and greater knowledge retention. We discuss the science behind productive failure and how it differs from traditional methods, which often focus on direct instruction followed by application. Dr. Kapur shares his experiences from childhood dreams of soccer to academic life at ETH Zurich, showing how personal failures have shaped his life and work. Together, we explore key concepts like the “four A’s” of productive failure: Activation, Awareness, Affect, and Assembly. This method encourages learners to first explore problems in a safe space, where failure is expected, to prepare them for deeper learning through expert guidance afterward. Dr. Kapur’s insights reveal how frustration and negative emotions, when managed safely, can enhance memory and motivation, making failure a powerful tool in the learning process. In this episode, Dr. Kapur provides real-world examples, from learning statistical concepts in the classroom to developing retrieval paths in social interactions. We also discuss how productive failure can be applied beyond the classroom to daily life and parenting, helping adults model and reinforce the benefits of persistence and exploration for children. Chapters: 00:15 — Introduction: Meet Dr. Manu Kapur and the Concept of Productive Failure 05:30 — The Science Behind Learning Through Failure 12:00 — The “Four A’s” of Productive Failure: Activation, Awareness, Affect, and Assembly 18:30 — Real-Life Examples: Productive Failure in the Classroom 24:00 — The Role of Emotions in Memory and Learning 30:05 — Applying Productive Failure in Daily Life 36:25 — Parenting and Productive Failure: Teaching Kids Resilience 41:50 — Productive Failure’s Global Applications and Cultural Reflections 47:05 — Key Takeaways and Where to Find More from Dr. Kapur About the Podcast I’m Dr. Robert Duff, and on this podcast, we dive deep into mental health and personal growth, bringing expert insights and practical advice to help you navigate life’s challenges. Join us for conversations that break down complex concepts into actionable steps. Guest Links: Dr. Kapur’s Book: Productive Failure: Unlocking the Science of Failure for Deep Learning and Growth Website: ProductiveFailure.com Follow Dr. Kapur on LinkedIn, Connect With Me: Website: http://duffthepsych.com Instagram: http://instagram.com/duffthepsych YouTube: http://youtube.com/duffthepsych #ProductiveFailure #Learning #Education #GrowthMindset #MentalHealth

    47 min
  7. 25 OCT.

    419: Seth Godin - Using Strategy to Shape Your Life and Mental Health

    In today’s episode of the Hardcore Self Help Podcast, I’m thrilled to sit down with marketing guru and best-selling author Seth Godin. Seth shares his near-death experience off the coast of San Clemente—a moment that became a powerful reminder of his mission to teach and contribute. We explore his philosophy of “strategy as a philosophy of becoming” and discuss practical ways to craft personal life strategies that align with our values, whether in creativity, mental resilience, or personal growth. In our conversation, Seth and I cover a range of ideas, from recognizing societal systems that impact our lives to overcoming societal pressures and finding meaning in service to others. Seth’s “lifeguard analogy” emphasizes the importance of focusing on helping others, and his insights are full of actionable takeaways for anyone looking to lead a more purpose-driven life. Tune in for an episode packed with practical strategies and reflections that can help you shape a life you’re proud of. Topics Covered: Breaking Down Writer’s Block and Building Creative Confidence The Lifeguard Analogy: Why Starting with Generosity Can Change Your Life Recognizing the Systems That Influence Our Daily Lives How Strategy and Mental Health Intersect in Our Modern World Building Powerful Daily Creative Habits Avoiding the Trap of Playing Games We’re Meant to Lose Developing Authentic Networks and Finding Your Community Timestamps: 00:15 — Introduction: Meet Seth Godin 02:05 — Breaking Down Writer’s Block and Building Creative Confidence 06:00 — Learning Through the Lifeguard Analogy: How to Start Contributing Now 12:15 — Recognizing the Systems Shaping Our Lives 18:30 — Personal Strategy and Mental Health: How They Intersect 24:00 — The Power of Daily Creative Habits 30:40 — Real-Life Applications: Who's It For, What's It For? 36:25 — Avoiding the Trap of Playing Games We’re Meant to Lose 41:50 — How Strategy Can Help Us Cope with Modern Mental Health Challenges 47:05 — Building Authentic Networks and Finding Community About the Podcast I’m Dr. Robert Duff, a clinical psychologist dedicated to breaking down complex mental health topics into relatable, actionable advice. On the Hardcore Self Help Podcast, we dive deep into mental health, personal development, and practical strategies to help you thrive. Each episode features expert interviews, useful tips, and answers to listener questions, all to support your journey toward a healthier, more fulfilling life. Guest Links: Seth’s Latest Book: This is Strategy Seth Godin’s Blog: Seth's Blog Seth’s Podcast: Akimbo Podcast Connect With Me: Website: duffthepsych.com Instagram: @duffthepsych YouTube: Dr. Duff’s Channel

    45 min
  8. 18 OCT.

    418: Healing Childhood PTSD with Anna Runkle The Crappy Childhood Fairy

    In this episode, I sit down with Anna Runkle, better known as the Crappy Childhood Fairy, to explore her journey of healing from childhood PTSD and the unique methods she has developed to help others do the same. Anna has helped hundreds of thousands of people worldwide re-regulate their nervous systems and recover from deep emotional wounds using simple but powerful techniques. We dive deep into what childhood PTSD really is, how it differs from complex PTSD, and what doctors often get wrong about trauma. Anna also shares her personal story of growing up in a chaotic commune, the lasting effects of emotional neglect and abandonment, and the practical steps she used to reclaim her life and happiness. Whether you're personally affected by trauma or seeking to support someone who is, Anna’s wisdom, tools, and personal insights provide valuable takeaways for anyone on a healing journey. Links: Order Anna's book Re-Regulated here: https://bit.ly/44Eo1ma Get Instant Access to Anna's free online course, The Daily Practice here:http://bit.ly/Cf CF_DailyPractice YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/CrappyChildhoodFairy Website: https://crappychildhoodfairy.com CCF Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/crappychildhoodfairy/ Timestamps: 0:00 – Introduction Introduction to Anna Runkle, aka the Crappy Childhood Fairy, and her mission to help people heal from childhood PTSD. Overview of the topics to be covered: childhood trauma, PTSD, healing methods, and Anna’s personal story. 2:30 – Anna’s Early Life and Growing Up in a Commune Anna describes her chaotic upbringing in a Berkeley commune, surrounded by addiction, neglect, and violence. The impact of family addiction and how it shaped her view of the world. 7:15 – Understanding Childhood PTSD vs. Complex PTSD Anna explains the difference between childhood PTSD and complex PTSD, and why she uses a more accessible term for the general public. How childhood trauma can stay latent and resurface in adulthood after new traumatic events. 12:45 – Coping Mechanisms and the Breaking Point Anna shares how being the "good girl" helped her survive but eventually led to deep depression. Her experience of hitting rock bottom and the overwhelming effects of what she calls a "trauma storm." 16:30 – The Effects of Gaslighting and Emotional Neglect Anna discusses the emotional invalidation she faced growing up and the gaslighting that made her doubt her own reality. The lasting impact of growing up in an environment of denial. 21:00 – The Role of Attachment Wounds and Limerence How unresolved emotional neglect led to dysfunctional relationships in Anna’s life, especially through a phenomenon called "limerence"—an obsessive, addictive form of love. The cycle of seeking validation in unhealthy ways due to an insecure attachment style. 27:30 – Trauma Healing and Nervous System Regulation Anna explains the concept of nervous system dysregulation and how trauma impacts not only emotions but also physical health. Her personal health struggles with autoimmune diseases and chronic fatigue, and how regulating her nervous system led to profound healing. 33:00 – The Power of Simple Healing Techniques Anna shares the simple yet powerful technique of writing down fears and resentments daily, a method she learned from a friend in AA. How this practice gave her the emotional relief she had been seeking for years. 38:45 – Generational Trauma and Breaking the Cycle Anna reflects on the generational trauma in her family and the importance of breaking the cycle of emotional neglect and dysfunction. How her own healing journey has allowed her to parent with more stability and emotional availability. 43:00 – The Myth of ‘What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger’ Anna challenges the common belief that trauma automatically leads to growth, explaining that for many people, trauma can be devastating without proper support. The dangers of spiritual bypassing and toxic positivity. 48:15 – Finding True Healing and Becoming Your Full Self Anna talks about the ultimate goal of trauma healing: becoming your full, real self and creating space to hear your own inner guidance. The importance of personal freedom, acceptance, and helping others on their healing journey. 53:00 – Practical Takeaways and Final Thoughts Anna offers actionable advice for anyone struggling with childhood trauma, focusing on simple daily practices that help re-regulate the nervous system and foster healing. How to connect with Anna and learn more about her work with the Crappy Childhood Fairy. Key Takeaways: Childhood PTSD often goes unrecognized or is misunderstood, even within the medical community. Emotional neglect and trauma can deeply impact adult relationships, leading to patterns of insecurity and attachment wounds. Healing from trauma involves re-regulating the nervous system, a process that can lead to profound physical, emotional, and mental recovery. Simple daily practices, like writing down fears and resentments, can provide powerful emotional relief and open the door to deeper healing. Breaking the cycle of generational trauma is possible, and it begins with self-awareness, acceptance, and practical steps toward recovery.   Support the Podcast: If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, rate, and leave a review! Your support helps others find the show. Follow me on Instagram: @duffthepsych Website: duffthepsych.com Join the Hardcore Self Help Facebook Community: Join Here

    1 h 9 min

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À propos

This is a podcast dedicated to answering your questions about mental health, anxiety, depression, relationships, sex, and life WITHOUT psychobabble BS. I am Dr. Robert Duff, a psychologist from Southern California, but I'm also a regular dude who legitimately wants to help out. I wrote the best selling books Hardcore Self Help: F**k Depression and Hardcore Self Help: F**K Anxiety. Those are available at http://hardcoreselfhelp.com

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