When the clutter, motherhood, relationships, and life seem too overwhelming. When you have resentment and frustration every day - this is a sign you have been living on auto-pilot- letting life happen to you instead of living it ON PURPOSE. I’ve been there. Three kids under 4 and I decided to declutter my home and realized I was living my whole life on autopilot. I wanted more.
I wanted to live a life of action and purpose. I wanted to parent with presence and peace. I wanted to enjoy my husband and kids, and myself.
This took me on a journey to simplify, slow down and SHOW UP for my life, on purpose!
Join me as I share my own journey, my life coaching tips, and my minimalist ideas to help you declutter your home, heart and life and start showing up for your life, for motherhood, for marriage, for YOU! with peace purpose and presence.
I’m Shawna, You might know me as your Nerdy Girlfriend and Life Coach. I am a trained transformation and life coach for moms, enneagram enthusiast, minimalist and author of the Life on Purpose Workbook.
I teach moms around the world the tools they need to set vision for the 9 areas of their lives, live in line with their personal values, and show up better for the life they want by shifting their mindsets.
Through decluttering the home, heart and life we can embrace simple living, be more conscious and positive parents, walk in faith, and live life ON PURPOSE.
I offer one on one coaching for moms and the Life on Purpose Academy for monthly lessons and coaching.
Find me at simpleonpurpose.ca
108. [Coaching Session] Seeking joy in motherhood
This is the final part of the coaching session with Laura, the mom of a 4-year-old and 1.5 year old .
In this part of the coaching call, we wrap up with how to take ACTION that moves her in the direction she wants to go as a mom. She is getting anchored in what she wants out of motherhood (joy), and making a plan on how she wants to get it.
If you haven't yet, make sure you listen to part 1 here, and part 2 here
Enjoying the early days of motherhood
When you are at home with small kids it can feel monotonous and boring.
There is a lot of pressure to 'enjoy these days'.
A crucial part here is not aiming for 100% enjoyment - but rather allowing for the full range of experience that comes with motherhood.
Loneliness in motherhood
When we start to think about how lonely we are, we can snowball into all the ways we feel it and keep our mind spinning about how it might always be this way and wonder what is wrong with our friendships, etc.
Part of stopping this cycle is to take an ACTION that pulls us out of it.
Laura mentioned that gratitude is something that naturally leads to joy for her. She wants SEEK JOY in motherhood and will use a gratitude practice as an intentional way of doing this.
You will find what you are looking for
Our brain has a confirmation bias to prove what it believes is true. It is constantly seeking evidence to line up with what we are believing. This is important to pay attention to the narrative we are spinning in (this is hard, I'm rejected, I am lonely, whatever it may be) because our brain will make it ITS JOB to find evidence.
Often we are in a narrative that was set on auto-pilot - so if we want to be intentional about showing up from a new narrative, then we need to also tell our brain something NEW and HELPFUL to be searching for.
Thank you so much to LAURA for volunteering and being vulnerable! This is the real honest truth of motherhood - sometimes it is messy and hard and lonely and the best thing we can do is share that with other moms. So we can live in a culture of motherhood that is supportive, truthful and encouraging.
The Life on Purpose Workbook
The Life on Purpose Roadmap Course
Email firstname.lastname@example.org for any questions
Book a coaching consult here, if you want to learn more about Life on Purpose coaching with Shawna
107. [Coaching Session] Being and loving the mom you ARE (self-recognition and values)
This is part 2 of my life coaching call with Laura. We are continuing the conversation with an exploration of what values she wants to bring into her parenting.
This portion of the coaching session was getting clarity on WHERE Laura wants to go as a mom, what it looks like for her to be a mom on purpose.
Head on over and catch part 1 right here.
When we are living in line with our values we feel more fulfilled, purposeful and at peace with how we are acting and behaving.
This is why it is so important to know your values - they inform you of what is important to you and where you want to direct your energies.
What you are in control of as a mom
So many of us moms want to control the outcome of our children. We want to control how they feel about things, what they do/don't do, how they think about us or others. But all of this is NOT in our control.
What is in our control is how we decide to show up (think, feel, act) - and our values are our compass on that.
Loving the mom you are
Part of loving WHO you are as a mom is recognizing what makes you unique. I love to do this with a list of all the things I think my kids will remember about me as their mom.
Self-recognition of ourselves helps us step out of comparison with others.
We wrap up with part 3 of this session.
106. [Coaching Session] Mom life, negative emotion, uncomfortable feelings
This is a Coaching Session I had with Laura, who is looking for coaching support on dealing with jealousy of when her kids prefer her husband to her - and with setting up a motherhood mantra for herself to anchor herself in motherhood.
I have divided this coaching session into three episodes.
In this first one, we cover awareness. We work on identifying the problem, seeing how it impacts her life and how we can shift away from judgement and fear of it.
In part two we will talk about being a Mom on Purpose and in part three we will talk about ways to bring joy into motherhood.
Life coaching session on intentional parenting and uncomfortable emotions:
* Starting with awareness. Paying attention to how you are feeling, what you are thinking and how you are showing up.
* Laura mentions she is a Type 4 on the Enneagram to learn more about that check out this episode on the Type 4 Mom
* Understanding how we are perpetuating negative experiences in our life
* Self-judgement layers on the problem
* Dealing with uncomfortable or negative emotions
* Experiencing emotions rather than identifying with emotions.
Head on over to part 2 of this call.
Join the Simple on Purpose Community Facebook group
105. Do you TRUST yourself to show up for YOU?
There have been a lot of changes I wanted to make in my life, but I didn't trust myself to follow through and do them. So I stopped setting goals and making promises to myself.
This is something I have bee through and coach many women on - the issue of not trusting yourself creates a situation where you don't believe you CAN do it, you stop looking for ways to learn, you look to others for the solution and validation and you spin where you are - in indecisiveness, anxiety and maybe apathy.
Showing up for others but not ourselves
Often this situation shows up in women who still 'get things done' - but they are doing things FOR other people, whether held by accountability or expectation or role. But they don't 'get things done' for THEMSELVES, they don't show up for themselves and do what they said they would do.
Can you relate to the situation of not trusting yourself?
* We might have an idea of what we want, but we waver on it, we doubt it.
* We might try something new, but we are insecure about it the whole time, we half show up.
* We might want to address an issue but we shrink away from it
* We might want to make a big change, but don’t believe it is possible
* We aren’t sure we are capable, that we know enough, that we are strong enough
* We don’t trust ourselves to do the thing we set out to do
What do you use as evidence that you can't trust yourself?
* how you have failed
* you did it wrong
* you didn't feel confident or motivated enough
* you've never done it before
* other people do it better/easier/faster
I used to not trust myself, and I'm sharing that in this episode:
* How I went through most of my adult life, not trusting muself. In fact, angry at who I was and what I wasn't doing with my life.
* The promises I made to myself that I would break
* How I am learning to become someone I can trust with my life
What happens when you trust yourself? What happens when you FOLLOW THROUGH on what you say you want to do?
I feel like I have been experiencing this over the past few years. I have taken back my power. I feel in control of my life. It feels possible to me that I can really do whatever I WANT to do in my life.
ACTION: I'm giving you a couple of simple questions to get yourself started with building back the trust in yourself.
More resources mentioned in this episode:
My C-Section and the Feelings I was Ashamed to Admit
Mom No Matter What
The Annual Simple on Purpose Survey
The Life on Purpose ROADMAP COURSE
Book a consult call to learn about 1:1 coaching with Shawna
Let's be Instagram friends
Bring your questions to the closed Facebook Group
104. Dress like you are 30
How should a 30 something-year-old dress?
I have asked this question for some years as I decluttered my closet and focussed on creating a closet of clothes I love to wear. I don’t want it to be the latest trends, but the clothes I enjoy and feel like ‘me’.
I’m not a fashion blogger but when the memes went around this month making fun of millennial moms who wear skinny jeans and side parts I felt like I wanted to encourage other millennial moms to focus on building up a closet of clothes they LOVE to wear and not what Gen Z tells us is ‘in’ right now.
Millennial Mom vs Trendy Youth
What being a ‘trendy’ youth is all about. Playing with clothes to see what you like and learn more about yourself
What being a millennial mom is all about. Knowing more of who you are and making choices in line with that
How to declutter and create a closet of clothes you love
Declutter the items you don’t love to wear, torn, unused, etc.
Then start a pinboard of looks you love
Look for a theme in what you are pinning
Name your style (bring it to the Simple on Purpose Group if you want help with that)
Use this style as your guide for what you buy/bring into your closet
Don’t focus on trends, focus on what your style is and what you feel great in
Mentioned in this episode
The Instagram of me being a totally unfun anxious mom on a family walk
Bring your ideas and conversation to the Facebook group
FULL TRANSCRIPT OF THIS EPISODE
This is the podcast for anyone who wants to simplify their homes, feel overwhelmed by clutter? - their heart. Do you feel like you're just kind of angry and resentful all the time? And their life - Do you feel like you're busy, you're on the go, you're just reacting to things. This is a place where I want to help you simplify those things so that you can have the time and space and energy to show up well for the things that matter the most to you in your life.
So this past weekend, we've had a four day weekend as a family, it was a pro D day Valentine's Day family day here in BC, British Columbia. So I take I took four days off work It was so it was weird. But it also felt really good. And we just took our time playing games and puzzles, and going skating and going for walks. And maybe you caught my recent Instagram post about the walk that broke my brain, you can go check that out there. If you want to see just a lovely ball of anxiety that I can sometimes be with my family. And it was a great time. It was great overall, I mean, there's good parts and there's hard parts every single day. So we just keep going, we keep rolling with it.
Alright, so one thing I want to remind you guys of is to leave a review, leave a review in your podcast player, because the podcast player loves them gives us authority in the podcast player. And I really love to read them. I love it when I come across one and especially if I recognize the name, but I didn't recognize this name from Australia. HealwithmeAIP. I loved your thoughtful review. So thank you so much. I read it over breakfast and I told my husband this morning, someone called me quirky. And he's like, What? That's not weird. Like, hasn't that happened before? Like you are quirky and I was like, Oh, okay. And I kind of laughed as I reflected on it because I used to want to define my personal style as quirky French girl. So you totally call me out on this secret byline I'm tryin...
103. Habits of a debt-crushing family (with Bethany + Corey Adkins)
We all can think of some financial goals we want to meet (debt-repayment, emergency savings) and maybe we know what habits could get us there - but DOING it is the hard work. And I find it so helpful to hear what other people are doing and what it looks like in action in real life.
Today I'm sharing the rest of my conversation with Bethany and Corey from the Millenial Mission Podcast about what their debt-free journey has been and in this part, they are sharing a lot about the habits they have formed and mindsets that have supported them in persisting and making an impact.
Developing habits to pay off debt as a family
Three changes that have made a big impact on lowering the debt
Knowing what money is coming in and what is going out
The debt snowball (coined by Dave Ramsey)
The financial freedom a budget can bring you
Weekly budget check-ins and monthly budget reviews
Addressing the problem before it becomes a problem
Spouses supporting one another in budget accountability
What to do when you have a spouse who is not on the same page as you with the finances
How debt repayment has impacted their marriage and parenting
Not doing it perfectly
Trusting God with finances, especially during the pandemic
Making sacrifices as a family
When you aren’t able to pay off debt and not giving up
Surrendering your life and money to God
Being intentional and faithful with finances and how that shows up in the other areas of your life
Encouragement to just get started and get a system in place to know what you are doing with your money
Listen to the first part one: Starting the Debt-Free Journey
How to Own Your Finances So They Don't Own You
Download the free budget worksheet
Find Bethany and Corey on Instagram
Hey friends, it's Shawna, your nerdy girl and life coach from simple on purpose.ca. So welcome for those of you who are new to simple on purpose. This is a place that I just want to share tips and stories and encouragement for you to simplify your home, your heart and your life. And part of life is finances right, we would all like our finances to be simpler. And in the life on purpose workbook and the life on purpose roadmap, there's a section on finances, where you can set the goals and habits you want to have there. And I think all of us probably can think of the goals we want when it comes to our finances. We want debt repayment, we want emergency savings, we want retirement savings, and so on. And maybe some of us even have an idea on what habits will get us there. We know logically, we need to make a budget we need to cut expenses. But doing it putting it into action is a whole other situation. And I don't know about you, but when I am trying to create a new habit or make a change in my life, I find it so helpful to hear the experiences of other people. And that's why I wanted to interview Bethany and Corey from the millennial mission podcast. This is the second part of my conversation with Bethany and Corey. In the first episode, the first part of this interview,
Customer ReviewsSee All
This is gold for Mothers!
I love the way Shawna shares great mindsets around living and mothering intentionally.
I like that Shawna is open about her own motherhood experiences & faith in a way that is refreshing. It is clear that the mindsets she shares are things she has studied, learnt and practised herself not just ideas she is getting on a high horse to tell every listener. I like that she is humble and quirky! Even better is that I am starting to put into practice the ideas Shawna shares and seeing good results in my life.
The way I am thinking about motherhood and life in general is slowly shifting as I keep learning more from this and other resources. For example today’s gold was... brain dump all your ideas on a list, but this list is not a ‘to do list’ it’s a ‘could do list.’ The purpose of this list is to help you prioritise, not to see everything I ‘have’ to do. I literally have not finished a to do list since I was about 16 and I am now 33... that’s half my life!!! This mindset along with others have been so freeing!
Thank you Shawna, all the way from Australia!
Simple but full of so much wisdom.
Every episode I have listened to has been full of so much valuable stories and advice that really help me in my day to day motherhood. Can’t wait for more!
Shawna’s podcast is gentle and unassuming; yet surprisingly packed with valuable information. Highly recommended for any woman seeking to live her own life.