The Rise Up Thriving Podcast Kristina Hudson

"If we are used to others invalidating our experiences, that again becomes part of the broken record that plays on repeat where we, in turn, invalidate ourselves and say 'Oh it wasn't that bad or maybe I'm just imagining things; maybe I'm making it out to be worse than it really is.'  And again that's gaslighting ourselves because we are making ourselves doubt our reality."

"When I was going through my divorce I remember hearing this cliche term "Oh it's another chapter that's closed or that's a chapter that's closed" and I was like "Dang, 14 years feel like so much more than a chapter. And, in Taylor Swift terms we can call it an era, and I think that's so much more meaningful because we can see how we can move through different eras in our life. We do not need to be defined by or held back by a single era. We can grow into something new."

In this episode, we explore codependency and how those traits attract someone with narcissistic tendencies.
This dynamic duo, of sorts, can create the perfect storm.
"The codependents will get their validation and fill their cup by feeling needed. So they will feel a sense of importance and feel like they are needed by their narcissistic partner because they are the one going over the top. They are the ones [always] taking care of [everything]. They are the ones self-sacrificing and they're minimizing their worth because they believe that their worth is based on their ability to care for and take care of others."
Does this resonate for you?
What would support you most on this journey of healing after narcissistic abuse?
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In this episode, I share how we can move beyond a gratitude practice in which we focus on 3 things we are grateful for each day, to a genuine mindset shift.
 
"It's a practice. It requires repetition to be able to shift our mindset especially if you have a tendency of thinking negatively first, which a lot of us do. That's a typical survival pattern, but [the goal is ] to be able to shift to a positive mindset and a mindset of gratitude."
 
Research shows that gratitude has emotional, mental and physical benefits. 
 
How can you grow into your practice? 
 
 

"Listen to your body when you are in these family dynamics. Start to experiment with different boundaries and different self-care strategies and techniques and figure out how you can love on that wounded child that didn't get her needs met when she was younger and likely never will from her parental figures but can from other sources and the best source of course is yourself."

"There's been a lot of talk, in recent years, about having an inner critic, which is that negative inner voice where we say things that are not nice to ourselves, when we criticize ourselves or some people I've heard even call it their inner mean girl. What would happen if we thought of ourselves in the moment of judgement, as a bully?"