Starcraft II

Starcraft II – Buy this game.  It does not suck.

Summary  – Ten years is a long time between the original and sequel for anything, but as with all things in the prequel/sequel/remake world, if the product is good, the time interval does not matter once you have the new item in front of you.  Starcraft II is just like the original, but on steroids.  Lots of steroids.  We’re talking testicle shriveling, soon to die from toxic shock syndrome steroids.  The game is so well put together in all aspects that the sheer joy of playing a well thought out and designed product blurs our vision to any shortcomings.  Sure, you may not like real time strategy games, but if you are one of those gamers who likes to stick with the familiar first person shooter and do not like to experiment with different PC game experiences, try this one out. It is a keeper.  And it will have legs.  Serious legs.

Storyline

 In a prior review, we made fun of a real time strategy game that ripped off the space elves/human/zerg theme from Starcraft.  Well we cannot do that here because this is where they reside.  However, the Starcraft people ripped of Tolkien, but who hasn’t.  Which leads me to a thought that has been bothering me for years.  Why is it that the foundation for 95% of all fantasy story themes and as a result, related game themes been that the human race can push out hyper intelligent and magical creatures such as the elves/protoss?  I mean, the elves are bi pedal, magic, and immortal.  In the real world, such a species would be dominant, but in the Tolkien/Fantasy/PC Game world, short lived, selfish, emotional humans seem to dominate.  It could be that we reproduce more and thus act like a virus (hat tip to agent Smith in the Matrix), but it doesn’t make sense.  I mean Elrond should have instituted a mandatory breeding program and this whole orc problem would have gone away because the elves would have sufficient numbers to simply eradicate them along with the forces of Mordor.

Same problem here.  For some reason the humans in this game are the dominant species and save the day.  But that is about the only irritating thing, and I have to remind myself that the target audience is human.  Not too many games marketed towards the Protoss/Space Elf market where I live.

OK.  Back to the task at hand.  In Starcraft you are James Raynor.  Apparently you were some type of stud in the last major war between the Zerg/Protoss/Humans (orc/elf/humans) and have retired to be a sheriff in a remote planet where you seem to run into many hives of scum or villainy.  You spend your time in a strangely spaghetti western bar drinking, and you listen to your music off a jukebox straight out of the 20th century earth.  For some reason you cannot get the copy of Freebird recorded by Lynryd Skynrd, but instead a remake by some band whose name I recognized but never listen to.  Your old buddy shows up in space armor after being released from prison, but he cannot take it off as a condition of some parole.  You pine away for your long lost girlfriend who is now a space spider in control of the Zerg.   I am not making this up.  An evil dictator is oppressing the masses, and like all good Arthurian tales, you the protagonist are going to lead a rag tag bunch of Starbucks and Apollo to collect the ancient artifacts necessary to destroy the zerg and save the day before they overwhelm the known galaxy.  You do.  You save your girlfriend, and the campaign ends. 

Astute readers will note the multiple pop culture references above, and that is by design.  The storyline drops little things here too.  The Starcraft team didn’t irritate us with meaningless storylines, the cut scen