The Imperfects

Hugh van Cuylenburg, Ryan Shelton & Josh van Cuylenburg
The Imperfects Podcast

We’re all imperfect. On this podcast, founder of The Resilience Project Hugh van Cuylenburg, his good friend Ryan Shelton, and only one of their brothers, Josh van Cuylenburg, talks to a variety of interesting people who vulnerably share their own struggles and imperfections, or expertly pass on their wisdom on the subject of imperfection. Whether it’s in The Vulnerabilitea House, The Academy of Imperfection, or with our very own psychologist, Dr Emily, The Imperfects are here to find some valuable takeaways we can all apply to our own imperfect lives.

  1. Dr Billy Garvey - From Boyz II Men

    3 DAYS AGO

    Dr Billy Garvey - From Boyz II Men

    Dr Billy Garvey gets kids. A developmental and behavioural paediatrician with over twenty years experience, Billy is an expert at up-skilling kids with the fundamental skills of empathy, kindness, compassion and self-esteem. Due to the extremely high demand for his expertise (the clinic waiting list is most likely seven years long at this point), Billy decided to co-produce his own podcast ‘Pop-Culture Parenting’, and has also just released a book Ten Things I Wish You Knew About Your Child’s Mental Health. In this Academy, Billy gets into the nitty gritty about masculinity, role modelling and teaching emotional regulation to kids, especially young boys (we even talk about porn). Extremely generous in sharing his own story, Billy reveals the purpose behind his clinic, and how he finds immense privilege in being here to do the work that he does (you’re going to need tissues). Thank you Billy, it is always pleasure.To watch this episode on YouTube, follow this link: https://bit.ly/47BHJAw 📖Things to read: Ten Things I Wish You Knew About Your Child’s Mental Health by Dr Billy Garvey - https://bit.ly/4eqyTb6 🎧Things to listen to: The Academy of Imperfection - Dr Billy Garvey, Paediatrician - https://apple.co/4doCYM8  An Imperfect Chat About Men - https://apple.co/4e2vQpP Another Imperfect Chat About Men - https://apple.co/3B6WkaW Pop-Culture Parenting - https://bit.ly/4e0VRpp Kendrick Lamar: The Art of Peer Pressure - https://bit.ly/3TupbMT 💻Things to check out: Social Learning Theory - https://bit.ly/3ZlYGwP and https://bit.ly/4dV9NkJ This episode references domestic violence. If this feels like too much for you to listen to right now, please skip this one, and come back when you are ready.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1h 8m
  2. Nathan Buckley - Out of The Woods

    15 SEPT

    Nathan Buckley - Out of The Woods

    For Nathan Buckley, self-reflection is critical for becoming the person he wants to be.  Placed on a pedestal during his playing career (for good reason), Bucks was Collingwood’s favourite son, and GOD he felt the pressure. Communicating only through criticism, both to himself and his teammates, Bucks says he was "demented" in the way he trained. In this episode, Bucks shares the steps he took to change his entire approach to playing and coaching footy. Importantly, unlearning that playing good footy meant being worthy and how letting go and asking for help completely changed his relationship with himself.Also... The Courage To Be Disliked gets a few mentions, we PROMISE Ryan isn’t sponsored, just obsessed!  Bucks, for someone who bleeds black and white, you have the biggest heart, and we love you a lot. To watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link: https://bit.ly/3MIykxv 📺Things to watch: Beefy’s Motivational Speech at Collingwood - https://bit.ly/3T9dCub Hugh’s ‘GEM’ Amazon Special - https://bit.ly/4dFL4AW 🎧Things to listen to: Jack Watts - Anxiety, Pressure in Football and Mistakes 📖Things to read: The Courage To Be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga - https://bit.ly/3Z0M1iK How To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie - https://amzn.to/3Z0jhqq How To Fight The Urge to Make Everything About Yourself - https://bit.ly/3yJddb3 The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1h 27m
  3. Dr Emily - Compassion of The Self

    8 SEPT

    Dr Emily - Compassion of The Self

    Do you feel like you're on your own side? Are you able to speak to yourself with kindness? Or stick up for yourself in front of others? That, my friend, is self-compassion and it can be incredibly hard to do.  Dr Em says, "compassion" in Latin translates to “with suffering.” And SELF-compassion is how we relate, reflect and react when our self is suffering. In this episode, Dr Em talks about why cultivating a self-compassionate voice is SO DIFFICULT, but how it's also pivotal in getting us through our darkest moments. And we chat through whether self-compassion needs a re-brand? (Hugh's gunning for self-chop-out, but we're still taking recommendations?)    To watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link: https://bit.ly/4gdli8B  📖Books Josh hasn’t read (but definitely will at some point) Against Empathy - Paul Bloom - https://amzn.to/4g53tbR Fierce Compassion - Kristin Neff - https://amzn.to/4cJESGI 🎧Things to listen to Brooke Blurton - The Path of Most Resilience - https://apple.co/4e8XmkP Dr Emily - Who Is Your Inner Critic & Why Is It There? - https://apple.co/3XaFdw9 💻Things to check out Kristin Neff’s online resources - https://bit.ly/3XspqKL Paul Gilbert’s review on Self-Compassion - https://bit.ly/3AQbJML Dr Emily is a clinical psychologist and you can find out more about her here - https://bit.ly/4gesuBy The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1h 8m
  4. Grace Tame - "Sexy-time, Scissoring, Autism"

    1 SEPT

    Grace Tame - "Sexy-time, Scissoring, Autism"

    In this Vulnerabilitea House, Grace addresses her adolescent self with a simple message - “It wasn’t your fault.” Australian of the Year, Next Generation Leader (as voted by Time Magazine), ultra-marathon runner and changer of laws, Grace Tame can't be tamed. Here she discusses the uncomfortable truths of her child sexual abuse, grooming & rape. She shares how survival mode became her new normal while dealing, and continuously recounting, her trauma in the public eye. Talking body, Grace is honest about her struggle with anorexia and the relief (after a whole lot of pain) of a recent endometriosis diagnosis.Ohh and she talks about autism, in the most beautiful unfiltered way!  Grace, it was the biggest privilege to have you in the studio. We love you immensely. To see Grace speak live (we implore you to), tickets for her show, Lightening the Load with Grace Tame are available here - https://bit.ly/3MitxTh. To watch the full episode on YouTube, follow this link: https://bit.ly/4cMEvLC 📖Things to Read The Ninth Life of a Diamond Miner: A Memoir - https://bit.ly/3AMZX5z Betrayed by my body - Michael Salter - https://bit.ly/3AzB2m0 💻Things to check out The Grace Tame Foundation - https://bit.ly/4cEHtld 📺Things to watch Grace’s Australian of the Year Award Speech - https://ab.co/3yVZBJr 🦋 If you or someone you know if experiencing an eating disorder, these are some helpful resources to look into: The Butterfly Foundation - https://butterfly.org.au/ Eating Disorders Families Australia - https://edfa.org.au Uncovery - https://bit.ly/3x4IOCO The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. Or visit the below support services.  Beyond Blue - https://www.beyondblue.org.au Suicide Call Back Service - 1300 659 467 - https://www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au/ Reach Out - https://au.reachout.com See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1h 25m
  5. Rana Hussain - Belonging For Connection

    25 AUG

    Rana Hussain - Belonging For Connection

    Have you ever felt excluded? Or like you don't belong? It turns out that belonging is a fundamental human need. To thrive, we need to feel safe, we need to feel welcome, but very importantly, we need to know the tribe has our back. In this Academy of Imperfection, Hugh, Ryan and Josh chat to founder of Good Human, Rana Hussain. Rana is a host of The Outer Sanctum podcast, a board member of Reconciliation Australia and consultant to a plethora of elite sporting clubs on bettering their diversity and inclusion strategies.In this episode, she shares how to get curious in a respectful way, why listening is everything and how to live a life true to your identity. Ohh and there's a pretty incredible love story in the ep as well!   Rana, it was an absolute joy, and you definitely left us better than you found us. To watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - 💻Things to check out Good Human - https://www.goodhuman.au Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs - https://bit.ly/4dsy3KX 🎧Things to listen to The Outer Sanctum - https://spoti.fi/3WJ9iCU Pallavi Sharda - Where We Belong - https://apple.co/3M3iEV5 Dr Emily - Other People Matter - https://apple.co/3M4A8k8 📖Things to read Belonging: The Ancient Code of Togetherness by Owen Eastwood - https://amzn.to/3M7s16l The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1h 16m
  6. Jack Steele - Socials Anxiety

    18 AUG

    Jack Steele - Socials Anxiety

    ‘The Inspired Unemployed’ began when a couple of tradies, Jack Steele and Matt ‘Falcon’ Ford, began an Instagram to catalogue the skits they were writing and filming overseas. Since then, Jack and Falcon have launched Australia’s fastest selling beer, collaborated with Fendi and Louis Vuitton, have 2 million followers on Instagram, launched a podcast exclusive to Spotify AND star in their own TV show The Inspired Unemployed (Impractical) Jokers. Life, from the outside, seems pretty much perfect. In this Vulnerabilitea House we chat with Jack Steele about his fear of losing relevance. Extremely generous in his vulnerability, Jack opens up about his terrifying panic attacks, anxiety over not being productive; his ADHD diagnosis; and what it’s like to live and work with your best mate, while still trying to be, well, best mates. Jack, we’re in love with you. To watch this full episode on YouTube, click this link: https://youtu.be/xxAx0kOOAo8  🎧Things to listen to: Hamish MacDonald- How To Be You - https://bit.ly/4dhN8Ph 📖Things to read: ADHD 2.0 - Edward Hallowell - https://bit.ly/4dlE8IP 📱Things to scroll: The Inspired Unemployed on Instagram - https://bit.ly/4dDpdtm 📺Things to watch: The Inspired Unemployed (Impractical) Jokers - https://bit.ly/4fGD2Jm Anomalisa - https://bit.ly/3Avx1il 📋Things to do: Maria’s Resilience First Aid Training - https://bit.ly/4dEYzQT 👨‍🦲Things for hair loss Hugh’s hairspray product - https://bit.ly/3yuh4ss Finasteride (please note this a prescription product and should only be used after a consultation with your GP) - https://bit.ly/3WNw2BI The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1h 6m
  7. Maria Ruberto - Advancing Despite Adversity

    11 AUG

    Maria Ruberto - Advancing Despite Adversity

    Settle in and grab your notebooks, you’re in for a good one. We’re joined by Maria Ruberto, director and founder of Salutegenics Psychology, who just happens to be Ryan and Josh’s (ex) psychologist. Maria is the co-designer of Resilience First Aid, an internationally recognised two-day certification program, which teaches the neuroscience of resilience (Ryan took sooooo many notes). We discuss with Maria the relationship between biology and behaviour, and the six domains of resilience. Getting technical, we delve into the negatives of screen time (hello darkness our old friend) and the ridiculously positive benefits of doing stuff with other people. So join us as we get started on building our resilience toolbox, practice breathing like a baby AND co-regulate like it’s no one’s business. To sign up to Maria’s Resilience First Aid training, follow this link: https://bit.ly/3WuhOFG To watch this full episode on YouTube, click here: https://bit.ly/3AvhAqp  🎧Things to listen to: Dr Emily - A Guide To Getting Therapy - https://bit.ly/3WSCF7f The Academy of Imperfection - Ben Crowe - https://link.chtbl.com/bencrowepurpose Gary Barlow - The Pain Behind The Pleasure - https://apple.co/4dzh356 Esther Perel - Let’s Be Better Lovers - https://apple.co/3Af9OB6 📖 Things to read: Stress Study: https://bit.ly/46A9bOB Defining Protective Resilience: https://bit.ly/3SFBQfm Resilience First Aid Evaluation: https://bit.ly/4dFRXll The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1h 24m
  8. Jackson Tozer - Don’t Give Up On Me

    4 AUG

    Jackson Tozer - Don’t Give Up On Me

    Jackson Tozer embodies the essence of The Imperfects podcast. Well, that’s what Ryan thinks, and we’re pretty keen to agree. Hugely successful and outrageously talented, Jackson, from the outside, is living the dream. Behind the professional success of acting alongside Shaun Micallef, John Cena and Zac Efron (and Ryan, can’t forget Ryan), Jackson found himself learning how to be a high-functioning addict (literally high) at rock bottom. Sharing his experience with grief, the loss of his best friend and marijuana addiction, which contributed to his battle with bulimia, anxiety and depression, we thank Jackson for being so bloody generous with his vulnerability.This episode with Jackson Tozer includes a discussion about eating disorders, marijuana addiction and suicide . If this feels like too much for you right now, please come back to this episode when you're ready. To watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://bit.ly/3YrXrf9 Join Movember and be part of the solution. To advocate for more action around men's health, head to https://bit.ly/3yv9BZX  🎭Things to check out Jackson’s Fringe Show - https://bit.ly/4cYNXwf Jackson on Instagram - https://bit.ly/3YoQoDZ Community Care Collective - https://bit.ly/3zYbUFb 📺Things to watch Ricky Stanicky - https://bit.ly/4bYQXat Mr Inbetween - https://bit.ly/4d4YZ31 🎧Things to listen to The Killers - Rut - https://bit.ly/4cUn4JM If you or someone you love is suffering from a marijuana addiction, these are some good places to start: Call DirectLine on 1800 888 236 for 24hr support Marijuana Anonymous Australia - https://bit.ly/3WG4boj Family Drug Support - https://www.fds.org.au/ 🦋 If you or someone you know if experiencing an eating disorder, these are some helpful resources to look into: The Butterfly Foundation - https://butterfly.org.au/ Eating Disorders Families Australia - https://edfa.org.au Uncovery - https://bit.ly/3x4IOCO The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. Or visit the below support services.  Beyond Blue - https://www.beyondblue.org.au Suicide Call Back Service - 1300 659 467 - https://www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au/ Reach Out - https://au.reachout.com See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1h 14m

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4.8
out of 5
55 Ratings

About

We’re all imperfect. On this podcast, founder of The Resilience Project Hugh van Cuylenburg, his good friend Ryan Shelton, and only one of their brothers, Josh van Cuylenburg, talks to a variety of interesting people who vulnerably share their own struggles and imperfections, or expertly pass on their wisdom on the subject of imperfection. Whether it’s in The Vulnerabilitea House, The Academy of Imperfection, or with our very own psychologist, Dr Emily, The Imperfects are here to find some valuable takeaways we can all apply to our own imperfect lives.

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