In It: Raising Kids Who Learn Differently

In It: Raising Kids Who Learn Differently

Discover In It, a podcast that explores the joys and frustrations of supporting kids with learning disabilities and ADHD. Join hosts Rachel Bozek and Gretchen Vierstra as they talk with parents, caregivers, teachers, and sometimes kids. They offer perspective, advice, and stories for and from people who have challenges with reading, math, focus, and other learning differences. Get tips on parenting kids with learning disabilities like dyslexia.

  1. 5 JUN

    When your child is labeled the “bad kid”

    What happens when a child with learning and thinking differences gets labeled as the “bad kid”? In this episode of In It, hosts Gretchen Vierstra and Rachel Bozek welcome Aleesha, a parent of five children, four of whom have an ADHD diagnosis. Aleesha has seen the effects of a child being perceived — and named — as the “bad kid.” She shares what it’s been like to navigate school systems and the painful experience of seeing her child misunderstood. We talk about why kids with ADHD and other learning differences are often mischaracterized. And Aleesha shares tips about what parents can do to support their children—and themselves—through it all. Related resources What should I do when my child says “I’m bad”?7 tips for improving your relationship with your child’s teacherFeeling socially isolated as a parent? You’re not alone8 things I wish people knew about parenting a child with ADHDWhat to do when your child is the bullyTimestamps  (2:19) First sign of a “bad kid” perception (4:17) First parent-teacher conference (4:48) End-of-year experience (7:04) Important sign of a challenge with the teacher (11:27) Talking with your child who feels like the teacher doesn’t like them (12:39) Another perspective (15:25) Talking to teachers about the impacts of their words and actions (19:02) Advice for parents in a similar situation (21:50) Focusing on the positive For a transcript and more resources, visit the episode page on Understood. We love hearing from our listeners. Email us at init@understood.org.   Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

    24 min
  2. Where do I start? Talking about sex to your kid with ADHD

    22 MAY

    Where do I start? Talking about sex to your kid with ADHD

    In this episode, hosts Gretchen Vierstra and Rachel Bozek welcome Amy Lang. Amy is a sex educator who works with kids with learning and thinking differences. She is also the founder of birdsandbeesandkids.com. She helps the hosts tackle a tricky but essential topic: talking to kids with ADHD about sex. Here are just a few of the topics Amy talks about: Ways to talk about — and not talk about — body parts.Helping kids understand how to navigate these topics both inside and outside the home.Why these conversations are so important.Listen for tips on how you can make these talks comfortable and effective. It’s a thoughtful, honest conversation that will help parents, caregivers, or anyone wondering how to support kids as they learn about sex. Related resources 8 ways to help teens with ADHD avoid dating trouble spotsADHD and sexSex, intimacy, and ADHDBirds + Bees + KidsTimestamps (1:39) When your child starts the conversation  (7:00) The importance of social cues (9:21) Kids being well-informed (11:28) What age to start talking about sex with your kid (14:00) Using the real names of body parts (17:04) Talking to kids at different ages (20:00) Potential challenges For a transcript of this episode and more resources, visit the episode page on Understood.org. We love hearing from our listeners. Email us at init@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

    33 min
  3. 8 MAY

    Hyperfocus: Did my ADHD make me more likely to have postpartum depression?

    Join health and science journalist Danielle Elliot as she investigates the rise of women recently diagnosed with ADHD. Listen to Climbing the Walls now. This week on In It, we’re sharing an episode from another Understood podcast. It’s called Hyperfocus with Rae Jacobson, and we’re big fans. When she first became a parent, Rae experienced a bout of severe postpartum depression. But at the time, there wasn’t much information about ADHD and women, let alone ADHD and postpartum mental health. Rae had heard that there was a link between ADHD and postpartum depression. But with a tiny baby to care for and a life to navigate, she had more pressing things to deal with.  But the question kept bugging her: Does ADHD make you more likely to have postpartum depression? This week on Hyperfocus, Rae finally gets some answers to questions she has had for years. Her guest is Dr. Catherine Birndorf, an expert on postpartum mood disorders and co-founder, CEO, and medical director of The Motherhood Center of New York. Related resources Catherine’s book: What No One Tells You3 things I’m learning as a new mom with ADHD72 hours in the life of a working mom with ADHDParenting tips when you and your child have ADHDTimestamps (02:55) ADHD as a postpartum concern (09:47) PMADs: Not just the ‘baby blues’ (14:21) What can struggling parents do? (21:07) Medication and pregnancy To get a transcript of this show and check out more episodes, visit the Hyperfocus podcast page at Understood.org We love hearing from our listeners. Email us at init@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

    31 min
  4. Sorry not sorry: Why you shouldn’t apologize for your kid

    24 APR

    Sorry not sorry: Why you shouldn’t apologize for your kid

    Join health and science journalist Danielle Elliot as she investigates the rise of women recently diagnosed with ADHD. Listen to Climbing the Walls now. In this episode of In It, hosts Gretchen Vierstra and Rachel Bozek welcome Christina Cipriano, PhD, MEd. Dr. Chris is a psychologist, and an associate professor at the Yale University Child Study Center. She is also the author of Be Unapologetically Impatient, which comes out this summer. Dr. Chris has four children, including a daughter who has ADHD and sensory challenges and a son with a rare, regressive disease. She has given a lot of thought to the idea of apologizing when you have nothing to be sorry for.  What can we say instead of “I’m sorry”? And what do we do when others say they’re sorry to us, just because something in our lives is a challenge? Dr. Chris has helpful tips for many of these scenarios.  Related resources What families wish you knew about learning disabilitiesTips from an ADHD coach: Saying sorry too muchWhy I stopped saying “sorry” as a mom (and started saying “no”)What to write in an email to your child’s teacherNeed help advocating for your kid at school? We talk to a proWhat is self-advocacy? Timestamps (1:43) The problem with the words “I’m sorry” (7:35) What is a deficit frame? (11:42) Alternatives to “I’m sorry” (19:54) More alternatives for apologizing (21:11) Teaching our kids to be unapologetic (23:42) Starting with “thank you” (24:46) The science of it all For a transcript of this episode and more resources, visit the episode page on Understood.org. We love hearing from our listeners. Email us at init@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

    28 min
  5. 10 APR

    Clean up this mess! Or don’t? Advice from an expert

    Join health and science journalist Danielle Elliot as she investigates the rise of women recently diagnosed with ADHD. Listen to Climbing the Walls now.  In this episode of In It, hosts Gretchen Vierstra and Rachel Bozek welcome author and therapist KC Davis. KC is a therapist who hosts the podcast Struggle Care. Her new book Who Deserves Your Love will be out in May 2025. She is also the best-selling author of How to Keep House While Drowning.   KC talks about being a “messy” person and reasons why we could all benefit from caring a little less about messiness. She offers tips for getting your home to “work for you.” And she helps us understand reasons to care less about the mess. Related resources Messy room? How to help your child keep it neatWhy kids with executive function challenges have trouble starting tasksListen: ADHD and messiness (Jeannie’s story)My Home Is Messy, and I Don’t Feel Bad About It (KC in The New York Times)Timestamps (3:08) What makes us special can also be what makes us scattered (4:41) The tendency to be messy (5:52) Identifying solutions (7:32) Executive function and home management (10:18) The steps involved in a task (11:20) Helpful tips (14:28) Focusing on function (16:37) How you talk about mess For a transcript of this episode and more resources, visit the episode page on Understood. We love hearing from our listeners. Email us at init@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

    27 min
  6. Need help advocating for your kid at school? We talk to a pro

    27 MAR

    Need help advocating for your kid at school? We talk to a pro

    Join health and science journalist Danielle Elliot as she investigates the rise of women recently diagnosed with ADHD. Listen to Climbing the Walls now. In this episode of In It, hosts Gretchen Vierstra and Rachel Bozek welcome professional parent advocate Danielle Ward. Danielle started out advocating for her own kids, several years ago.  Now, through her company Encompass Parent Solutions, she offers families of kids with learning and thinking differences non-legal help with advocacy, support, and education counsel.  Danielle chats with Gretchen and Rachel about some of the most important dos and don’ts for parents who are advocating for their child at school. Danielle outlines the steps to take when your child is struggling and how to recognize when a parent advocate might be necessary. She also explains the difference between a parent advocate and a special education attorney. For a transcript and more resources, visit the In It page on Understood. We love hearing from our listeners. Email us at init@understood.org. Related resources 8 steps to advocating for your child at schoolWhere to find legal helpThe difference between special education advocates and attorneysWhat is the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA)?Listen: An attorney’s advice on special education disputesTimestamps (00:59) What does a parent advocate do? (02:56) Description of Danielle’s first IEP meeting (04:57) Understanding the difference between parent advocates and lawyers (08:13) Whether or not kids should be in meetings at school (09:22) Steps to follow when you sense your child is struggling (10:33) What to do when your child has a diagnosis (15:24) Tips for writing an effective letter or email (19:02) Dos and don’ts for child advocacy (22:06) Guidelines for recording meetings Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

    27 min
  7. Parenting’s a lot. Especially when you’re a lot

    13 MAR

    Parenting’s a lot. Especially when you’re a lot

    Join health and science journalist Danielle Elliot as she investigates the rise of women recently diagnosed with ADHD. Listen to Climbing the Walls now. In this episode of In It, hosts Gretchen Vierstra and Rachel Bozek welcome parenting coach Mary Van Geffen. Mary offers online classes including a special one for moms of what she calls “spicy ones.” She also shares fun, funny, and relatable posts every day on Instagram. Mary talks with Gretchen and Rachel about parenting spicy kids and how to know if you, too, are spicy. What does it mean to be spicy? Are you spicy? And what should you do about it? Related resources Parenting tips when you and your child have ADHDBody doubling for ADHD: What it is and how it works5 oddly specific ADHD strategies that help me workListen: ADHD and: Parenting failsListen: Double trouble: ADHD moms share what it’s like to parent kids with ADHDMary Van Geffen: Parent Coach for the Spicy OnesTMTimestamps   (1:10) Defining “spicy ones” (4:41) Parents’ worries about themselves as parent   (7:36) What impacts children most (8:59) Dealing with sensory overload as a parent (16:51) Organization challenges for parents with ADHD (18:55) Body doubling For a transcript and more resources, visit the In It page on Understood. We love hearing from our listeners. Email us at init@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

    30 min
  8. Trouble with skill-building for ADHD? Here’s help

    27 FEB

    Trouble with skill-building for ADHD? Here’s help

    Join health and science journalist Danielle Elliot as she investigates the rise of women recently diagnosed with ADHD. Listen to Climbing the Walls now. For kids who struggle with ADHD, building skills like executive function and self-advocacy can be difficult.  In this episode of In It, hosts Gretchen Vierstra and Rachel Bozek welcome Dr. Andy Kahn. Andy is a licensed psychologist and the associate director of behavior change and expertise here at Understood. He’s also the host of the podcast Parenting Behavior with Dr. Andy Kahn. Andy discusses why skill-building is important for kids with ADHD. He also shares many ways families can help. Related resources Understanding impulsivity in kidsThe 3 areas of executive functionADHD medication shortages: 8 ways to copeListen: Talking through social strugglesListen: The power of self-advocacy for kids at IEP and 504 meetingsTimestamps   (1:27) Reasons why some kids do not take meds  (3:42) Areas where skill-building can help kids with ADHD  (5:33) Skill-building for executive function  (10:38) Skill-building for social situations (15:40) Skill-building for impulsivity  (19:25) Understanding and working on self-advocacy  (23:00) The connection between access to medication and skill-building For a transcript of this episode and more resources, visit the In It page on Understood. We love hearing from our listeners. Email us at init@understood.org. Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

    27 min

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Discover In It, a podcast that explores the joys and frustrations of supporting kids with learning disabilities and ADHD. Join hosts Rachel Bozek and Gretchen Vierstra as they talk with parents, caregivers, teachers, and sometimes kids. They offer perspective, advice, and stories for and from people who have challenges with reading, math, focus, and other learning differences. Get tips on parenting kids with learning disabilities like dyslexia.

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