Enlightened by Aoife Enlightened by Aoife

🎙️✨ Join us in this engaging podcast episode as Sharon Redmond, a Mindset Coach for Leadership specialising in change. Sharon shares her expertise on topics such as change, boundaries, courage, and self-worth. We explore the difference between coaching and counseling, breaking change into manageable pieces, and using the DBT Emotional Regulation skills to manage our energy and pursue what we really want in life. 💜✨

In a candid discussion, we share personal stories of overcoming challenging life events, including evictions, health issues, and breakups. We highlight how these moments of change can feel like our lives are falling apart but also present exciting opportunities for growth. We discuss the physical effects of stress, the launch of my positive coping mechanism jewellery range, and the importance of being the coach we wish we had during difficult life experiences. ❤️‍🩹✨

Throughout the episode, we touch on powerful themes such as vulnerability, self-compassion, and the ever-moving goalposts of self-acceptance. We explore the impact of societal pressure to succeed and how it can affect our sense of self-worth, leading to burnout. We dive into the challenges of people-pleasing, good-girl syndrome, setting boundaries, and learning to prioritise our own well-being. 🥰✨

Listen as we share insights on reframing negative self-talk, finding the language to express our needs, and the importance of support circles during the healing process. 🎧✨

We discuss the masks we wear in the world and how they can be coping mechanisms for managing rejection sensitivity disorder(RSD). 🎭 We also explore the reality of healing in a world obsessed with perfection and the importance of choosing to pursue joy even in the midst of our difficult emotions. 😅✨

Throughout this episode, Sharon's resilience shines through as she shares her own experiences of overcoming personal and professional challenges. Her wisdom and guidance offer hope and inspiration to listeners seeking personal growth, resilience, and self-compassion.💜

🫢🙉 Please note that this episode contains adult humor, and a warning is issued for young listeners.

I really enjoyed this episode and genuinely feel it’s very powerful. I hope you get something lovely from it!

Wishing you hope, happiness and healing

Aoife x

Join us in todays episode of "Enlightened by Aoife" as we aim to inspire of hope and healing. Our special guest, the insightful Nadija Bajrami, Multi Award-Winning Strategic Hypnotherapist, Mind Coach & Psychic Medium, Reiki Healer, and Trauma Empowerment Specialist, and soon to be Grief Educator as we open up about grief, trauma, and the transformative power of self-compassion, kindness and care. 
  
**Trigger warning: Suicide, losing loved ones, sickness** 
  
As a soon-to-be Grief Educator, Nadija offers a compassionate perspective on grief and trauma. We explore the importance of honouring our emotions, creating space for healing, and accepting the pain we feel. Nadija beautifully reminds us that awareness doesn't eliminate the pain but enables us to realise that staying stuck in suffering is often optional.  
  
Grief extends beyond the loss of loved ones; it encompasses life changes, injuries, illnesses, or even losing a job. In our conversation, we acknowledge that trauma isn't solely caused by significant events but can also stem from seemingly smaller experiences, such as childhood teasing, undiagnosed conditions, our boundaries not being respected or our unmet needs. We also touch on the profound impact of trauma on self-worth and healing of our inner child, ensuring that past wounds no longer hold us back from being mindfully present. 
  
Nadija and I emphasise the resilience and worthiness of individuals navigating tough times or processing trauma, reminding us that they are not broken, even when we may feel that way. We discuss the importance of feeling safe and ready to process trauma and seeking support when needed, whether from friends, family, or professionals. Sharing our struggles and seeking compassion can lead to really empowered healing where we feel heard and supported. 
 
Navigating our healing journey is a process that requires kindness and understanding towards ourselves. We explore the significance of having a support network and meeting ourselves where we are, acknowledging that progress may fluctuate. We delve into the stages of healing, the challenge of opening up after bottling emotions, and the power of finding a safe, supportive space to feel, process, and heal. 
  
Through personal stories, Nadija courageously shares her own experiences with significant losses, brain tumours, and temporary paralysis, which compelled her to reassess life's purpose. Her journey serves as a testament to turning pain into purpose and wounds into wisdom, inspiring us to keep forging ahead on our own paths towards becoming our best selves. 

Shout out to The Edge for their help in recording this in person from the Blackbox!

I really hope you enjoy this episode and it helps you on you own journey of cultivating hope and healing,

Aoife x

If you are triggered by anything we spoke about in this episode or would like to seek help here are a list of mental health resources available in Ireland:


Samaritans Ireland: A helpline available 24/7 for emotional support and listening. Website: samaritans.org/ireland | Helpline: 116 123


Pieta House: A nonprofit organization providing free therapy and support to those in suicidal distress or engaging in self-harm. Website: pieta.ie | Helpline: 1800 247 247


Aware: A charity that offers support, education, and information about depression and bipolar disorder. Website: aware.ie | Helpline: 1800 80 48 48


Turn2Me: An online mental health community providing support through online counseling, support groups, and self-help tools. Website: turn2me.ie


Jigsaw: A mental health service for young people aged 12-25, offering a range of supports, including counseling, group work, and online resources. Website: jigsaw.ie
HSE Mental Health Services: The Health Service Executive provides a range of mental health services across Ireland. Contact your local HSE Mental Health Services for more information. Website: hse.ie

Cathy bravely talks about how she found laughter yoga during her recovery from Breast Cancer. She went to a conference organised by @TheIrishCancerSociety and tried Laughter Yoga herself and as she says herself hasn't stopped laughing since. From knowing Cathy personally I can back her up. She always seems to embody calm, realistic positivity and the lighter side of life.

Learning to laugh again when struggling with depression can be tough. We chat about facing the internal critic that is a barrier to getting out of a depressive cycle as Cathy says herself 'life is so much better when you're laughing'.

An interesting thing is the body does know the difference between real and induced "fake" laughter. Therefore it releases the happiness hormones into the brain having a positive impact on our physical and mental well-being

I link this back to the Distress Tolerance skill Half-Smile taught in DBT. How if we smile it starts to trick the brain into feeling better and how our behaviour can affect our mood.

We also talk about how we all feel like a bit of an eejit and self conscious when we start to practice these skills as they are out of our comfort zone but how the benefits are are worth the initial discomfort.

We chat about the shame and stigma that still surround mental illness in Ireland and how important it is to have an authentic conversation about mental health and the coping skills I've learnt in therapy. We hope this helps people recognise that they have depression or anxiety, how to accept it, being kind to ourselves and finding our own way to heal yourself.

We all have a mental health tool box that is build up with skills and techniques to better manage our emotions that we build up over time.

We delve into the struggle of doing things we know will make us feel better when we are down, the challenges we all face and how to overcome them. Once we have the awareness you can pull yourself up quicker and but safety nets in place to stop us slipping as far as fast. It's scary at first but gets much easier overtime .

We talk about the group of 7 women we went on the Camino with, some of whom we met for the first time in the airport. We look at the support, encouragement and gifts that each and everyone of the group brings to the table and how we lift each other up. We touch on self-belief, self-worth and setting our standards for to love and value our ourselves

Cathy bravely talks about going from a marriage into a breakup, realising that what she hoped for was never going to work out, a long drawn out divorce, raring 2 children, re-buying her house, getting a chronic life changing illness, ending up in hospital, undergoing reconstructive surgery and then to be diagnosed with breast cancer.

She talks about how she couldn't have done it without her circle of support, her family. She shares the roles her family played to help her get through an extremely difficult period of her life where it was literally life or death. She explains what it was like to receive and accept help and find self-compassion, self-love which helped her realise her self-worth

Her mindset, grit, grace and sheer appreciation of life is a testament to her incredible, resilient and just down right inspirational character. She helps so many people around her, myself included and I've no doubt her light will continue to shine and provide hope and healing for others.

Honestly I feel this podcast is raw, honest and real that a lot of us can relate to. It shows that we can get through the darkest of times and come out the other end stronger.

I hope you enjoy this episode and we would really appreciate it if you could leave a review, share on your stories or to a friend, all the likes, love and comments make a huge difference and I'm really grateful for the support so far!

Wishing you hope and healing,

Buen Camino,

Aoife x

Big thank you again to Mark Clifford for our lovely conversation about the role nutrition plays in our wellbeing
I'm so excited to announce my first guest, Mark Clifford a Food Scientist from Somega, an Irish natural food supplement company based in Cork which he founded with his wife Paula who's a Nutritionist.
If you are triggered by anything we talked about today please reach out to supports available through Bodywhys | or contact your GP. One of the hardest parts is reaching out. Once you do they have professionals that are there to help. 
We discuss the impact food can have on our mood.
I share what it was like to struggle with stomach pain and food sensitivities. The doctors put it down to stress. I address how that affected my social life, confidence and mental well-being. 
Mark explains that the evolution of science over that 50 years highlights the biology behind stress and how that impacts our brain chemistry. It shows that nutrition is a key element along with exercise and sleep to optimise our mental and physical well-being.
We touch on how we can make small simple changes to our diet that can improve our nutrition and in turn our health. We also discuss why we don't see the results of eating healthy straight away which causes us to abandon these changes and what we can do to make it easier on ourselves by looking at our microbiome, the bacteria in the gut which creates hormones such as serotonin or dopamine which affect our mood, mental and physical wellness.
I touch on my experience with disordered eating and how I overcame restrictive eating and slowly got to food freedom. I talk about the impact that changing my diet had on my physical and mental health. Then how stress and anxiety caused food intolerances and crippling stomach pain. These issues then fed back into my mental health as I isolated for fear the embarrassment and discomfort of my tummy acting up.
Which leads us nicely into talk about the gut-brain axis and why is so important.
Did you know that much serotonin (the happiness neurotransmitter) is made in the gut?! 95%? Along with other good and bad bacteria that a growing pool of research suggests can lead to memory loss, early onset Alzheimer's as well as anxiety and depression.
Mark reminds me of Blue Zones where people live longer lives and he talks us through the benefits of eating whole foods and some of the reasons why processed foods can be bad for our overall health if eaten regularly.
We also discuss stress and how we can let things get to an unbearable level and the impact those stress hormones have on our mind and body.
This podcast is full of helpful tips that on how we can make simple improvements to our nutrition that can have a big impact on our mental, emotional and physical wellbeing as well as quality of life.
Big thank you again to Mark Clifford for our lovely conversation about the role nutrition plays in our wellbeing. 
If you enjoyed this podcast please leave a review! the more stars and reviews we get the more people we can potential have a positive impact on and you never know who may need to hear this today. 
Thank you, thank you, thank you for all your support this far as I try make a difference to our growing mental health numbers. If you haven't already I would be grateful if you could show some love and share, like, comment or message the Enlightened by Aoife Instagram. 
Wishing you hope, happiness and healing!
Aoife x

Negative thought patterns often come hand in hand with anxiety, stress, panic and worry.

It feels endless and exhausting but they're are many ways to overcome it.

One of the most effective ways to deal with negative thought patterns is to become more aware. To learn how to pause for a second, recognise and redirect your thoughts in to a more positive pathway.

Mindfulness practices such as paying attention to your senses, breathing, body and surroundings can be extremely helpful.

Being mindful helps you focus on the present moment and become more aware of both your thoughts and feelings. By doing this, you can discover ways to recognise when negative thoughts are taking over and you can learn shift your focus to something more positive or back to the present moment.

An absolute crucial component to managing or even living with anxiety is learning coping mechanisms for when everything just feels too much.

You build up your mental health tool box with reliable skills and strategies that work for you. They don't need to make sense to anyone else.

I'm sure many people will judge me for the coping mechanisms I've described in this podcast but there should be no shame. We all have things that make us feel better or worse and having that awareness is your super power

Some helpful coping mechanisms include:

💜Mindfulness What Skills
✨Observe
✨Describe
✨Participate

💜Mindfulness How Skills
✨Non-Judgementally
✨One-Mindfully
✨Effectively

💜Breathing techniques
💜Coping Skills (Distress Tolerance)
💜Healing Skills (Emotion Regulation)

This content is a mix of techniques I've learned in my Mindfulness Practitioner course, mindfulness practices but also through DBT. They teach these skills in hospitals to treat mood disorders, depression, anxiety amongst other mental health problems. A lot of these services are outdated and exceptionally hard to get access to so I'm trying to share them to hopefully help those who need ot but also to improve the wellbeing of anyone wanting to get that 1% better each and every day 💪🏻

To conclude, mindfulness and positive coping mechanisms are a key component to regaining control of anxiety and our thoughts in general.

By being aware of your thoughts and feelings as well as learning how to focus on the present moment, you can reduce feelings of low mood, stress, anxiety and improve your overall well-being.

With the right support, knowledge and skills it is possible to live a happier and more fulfilling life, even in the face of all the stressors life throws at us.
I hope these skills help and thanks so much for listening in again.

Wishing hope, happiness and healing until next time,

Aoif 💜✨x

Breakups, evictions, change in career, changes in health and our routine can all impact our emotional wellbeing. 
After going through a very rocky and unexpected turn at the end of 2022 I talk about hope I managed to not let this break me and hopefully come out stronger for the year to come. 
Change can be really difficult and uncomfortable at times. We can get stuck mourning and grieving for the life we had or could have had but how do we overcome this? how do we take change in our stride and welcome all the opportunities that come with it? 
By looking at Henry Fords 6 Strategies For Coping with Change I talk about how I managed to navigate through this really challenging period of my life and letting you know what helped and didn't. 
1) Plan ahead - set goals and set yourself up for the best posible outcome
2) Reframe you thinking. Try not fall into victim mindset and try lean into all the positive opportunities this change can bring 
3) Reflect of your thoughts and behaviours
4)Strive to create and maintain a level of normalcy
5) Create comfort and things that you can lean on when it all feels a bit much
6) Count your blassings. I can emphasis this enough but take time to focus on what you are grateful for. It will make the wprld of a difference in the long run.
If you would like to learn more about how he recommends we do this you can check out the blog post that started me on my journey here ---> https://www.henryford.com/blog/2017/05/coping-with-change
If you also struggle with eating like I briefly discuss in this podcast please have a look at https://www.bodywhys.ie/ they have really good information and resources that can help