Small Jar Podcast - The Ride to the Empty Nest Jennifer Collins

Is it just me, or do we moms bear the brunt of the responsibility for the end of year celebrations and our kids' transition to summer? Your kid might be taking final exams and you're supporting them through that stress. Your child could have just graduated, and you've planned countless celebrations, hosted family, and attended endless "lasts".  Or maybe your college kid is back home and suddenly there's more laundry, more mess, more groceries needed. There is so much to celebrate and look forward to, but as a mom, you might also be feeling a lot of stress, anxiety, and frustration. If this is you, you're definitely not alone. Join me as I work through my own end of school year overwhelm.

Last week I shared my own version of "mom archetypes", celebrating the many strengths and gifts that we bring to this beautiful and crazy journey of motherhood. We love our kids so much, and we want them to be safe, happy and successful. At different times and stages, any of us moms could lean on the fearless protective power of what I call "The Guardian."  Join me as I explore how there is a Guardian in every one of us as moms, and how that's actually been an incredibly helpful gift--both to us and our children. The Guardian. Achiever. Nurturer. Mentor. Which type are you?Take the Mom Archetype Quiz: https://small-jar.involve.me/momarchetypequiz

I want to celebrate how beautiful and powerful we are as moms. But we are all also unique in how we approach motherhood. So I thought I’d put together a bit of a Myers-Briggs or Enneagram-style view of Mom Archetypes that offers a more holistic view of who we are as moms...not defined by our challenges, but rather by our strengths. With each of these Mom Archetypes, I am taking as a given that every one of these “types” are the kind of mom who loves her kids and tries her best.  And like with any archetypal model, while we might lean in the direction of one of these particular types, we all have the potential to have an element of any of these types. The Guardian. Achiever. Nurturer. Mentor. Which type are you?

I have learned two incredibly important lessons over the past few years. And these lessons have made my own transition to having a child in college so much easier. Raising teens can feel challenging. We simply want to help them be safe, happy and successful...and yet, this seems to become increasingly difficult as our teens grow up. But even when our kids don't want our help, or when we recognize that there is little that we can do actually make them happy when they're struggling, it can be terrifying to let go of our desire (maybe even our need) to make things better. In this episode, I explore two lessons that changed everything for me...and they may surprise you.

"The only scarier than change is regret." Oof. I don't know who first said this, but for us moms of teens, this hits home. Our lives are constantly changing. Teens growing up. Pulling away. Facing new challenges. We are approaching a time when our kids will no longer be around as much. These changes can be scary. But often, we find ourselves stuck in guilt and regret about the past. Our parenting style and the way we've chosen to raise our kids. Our love lives. Career choices and sacrifices. Our personal identity and self-care. Regret often starts with a belief that somehow the present would be different...better...if only I had made different choices in the past. But my friend, this regret isn't helping you move forward. It's keeping you stuck. Join me as I explore why regret might be the one thing you need to let go.

What is a "Managed Mindset?"  It's the antidote for the Worry Mindset, the Validation-Seeking Mindset, the Judgment Mindset, and the Fix It Mindset. Our subconscious brains fall into mindset traps all the time in an effort to keep us safe.  This is normal. But if we don't recognize this - if we don't supervise our minds, then we end up stuck in painful emotions -- anxiety, anger, shame, guilt, and overwhelm. When you are able to manage your mind, you can overcome these mindset traps and find peace and confidence, even when the world around you is in turmoil. Having a Managed Mindset means taking control of your emotional well-being.