Beyond MeToo: Healing the Wounds of Sexual Trauma

Molly Coeling
Beyond MeToo: Healing the Wounds of Sexual Trauma

This podcast is both a resource for anyone affected by sexual trauma, as well as a tribute to all those who are doing the hard work of healing. This project asks the question “Where do we go from here?” – at both the individual and collective levels. To truly work in the direction of wholeness, we must not only tell the story of what happened to us, but we must also share our stories of healing. That is where we find our strength and our hope – the hope that healing is possible for ourselves, as well as for our society.

  1. Amy Dawn on Navigating the Criminal Justice System

    07/06/2022

    Amy Dawn on Navigating the Criminal Justice System

    In this episode, Molly interviews Amy Dawn about how she navigated the criminal justice system after deciding to press charges against the man who raped her. Some key highlights include: How Amy found herself in a role reversal from criminal justice student to someone navigating the system, and the challenge she experienced coming to terms with being a rape survivor. Her decision to report and then to pursue legal action. Disclosure and allowing other people’s reactions to impact how we feel about ourselves and what happened to us. Victim blaming, objectification, and dehumanization throughout the legal process. The importance of her legal advocate throughout the legal process. How the legal system’s way of poking holes in her character led to her questioning her very identity. The awkwardness/injustice/irony of being a mere witness in a case about her own rape. Her decision to leave the criminal justice world professionally. Finding her voice and her authentic self.   Amy Dawn has a Master’s in Criminal Justice and Criminology but left that field behind following her own experience with sexual assault. She pivoted careers and now volunteers with Resilience as a medical advocate. Outside of her full-time day job, she also works as a photographer. She is passionate about using her experience to foster dialogue whether it be through writing, photography, or advocacy. In her spare time, you’ll usually find her with her best friend, her dog Addison, who she rescued from Paws, and when they are feeling ambitious, they love taking in foster dogs. -------------------------------------------- SUBSCRIBE to the show to be the first to hear about new episodes! Amy Dawn is putting together a currently untitled photography project around survivors. It’s meant to bring to light the magnitude of words during disclosures, to convey the impact of victim shaming, and to humanize survivors. Link here: https://www.amydawnphotography.com/open-call   Contact Molly: www.theembodyconnection.com // molly@theembodyconnection.com   -------------------------------------------- Special thanks to:   Jenn Baykan, content creation for somatic based healers  https://www.jbaykan.com/   Dave Hiltebrand for intro and outro music original composition: https://www.davehiltebrand.com/   Gina McLaughlin Photography for photo and graphic design: https://www.facebook.com/ginamclaughlinphotography/?fref=tag

    1h 1m
  2. The Role of Touch in Healing from Sexual Trauma

    10/05/2022

    The Role of Touch in Healing from Sexual Trauma

    “Many sexual trauma survivors went into a freeze state.. And so there’s this sense of ‘My body betrayed me, and I don’t want to be in this body, but I’m stuck here, so I’m going to do the best job I can to not be here.’ And that is the ultimate disconnection. So what we’re going for is to start to reconnect that, just a little bit at a time, maybe at first just with questions and guidance, and little by little, help you start to recognize that your body is an ally in this process of healing. And in fact, because it was the site of the crime, it’s also the site of immense healing. And until you can actually feel that, there are things you can’t heal. There are things you can’t heal with words because words weren’t what injured you.”   In this conversation, Molly and regular special guest Sarah Brennan share their perspective on the role of touch in healing from sexual trauma. Some of the themes they explore are: The power of safe touch. Doing TO the body or making the body DO versus feeling, experiencing, and listening to the body with genuine curiosity. The body as key to healing injuries that were (and continue to be) experienced in the body. Feeling betrayed by the body’s response to assault or violation. Feeling subtle sensations again (or for the first time) after only being able to feel extreme sensations or numbing out or being hypervigilant - or any combination of the aforementioned strategic adaptations.    “People who are terrified need to get a sense of where their bodies are in space and of their boundaries.  Firm and reassuring touch lets them know where those boundaries are: what’s outside them, where their bodies end. They discover they do not need to constantly wonder who and where they are. They discover their body is solid and they do not have to constantly be on guard. Touch lets them know they are safe.” ~Bessel Van Der Kolk -------------------------------------------- SUBSCRIBE to the show to be the first to hear about new episodes!   Contact Sarah: www.theembodyconnection.com // sarah@theembodyconnection.com   Contact Molly: www.theembodyconnection.com // molly@theembodyconnection.com   Book: The Body Keeps the Score, by Bessel Van Der Kolk   -------------------------------------------- Special thanks to:   Jenn Baykan, content creation for somatic based healers: https://www.jbaykan.com/   Dave Hiltebrand for intro and outro music original composition: https://www.davehiltebrand.com/   Gina McLaughlin Photography for photo and graphic design: https://www.facebook.com/ginamclaughlinphotography/?fref=tag

    36 min
  3. Anne Jensen on religious & sexual abuse, disclosure, and healing intimacy

    26/04/2022

    Anne Jensen on religious & sexual abuse, disclosure, and healing intimacy

    “I’m still struggling with ‘my body is my own’... It really does make me angry because it feels like I’m missing out on this wonderful thing that you experience with a partner.”   In this episode, Molly interviews Anne Jensen, a survivor of childhood sexual abuse within a religious cult, shares her journey over the past several years after disclosing the abuse to her family. She discusses how the process of disclosing was retraumatizing for her, how she started doing the true work of healing when she was truly ready, the role of religion & purity culture in her silencing and disempowerment, and her ongoing struggles with intimacy.   Anne was born and raised in a non-denominational Christian cult in Ontario, Canada, where she endured years of sexual, emotional, and religious abuse. After her family moved out of the community, she spent her teenage years and early twenties in evangelicalism trying desperately to find some kind of healing. She stayed silent about the abuse until she was forced to reveal it in 2015. Since then she has left religion and fully committed herself to her own healing journey which has included talk therapy, yoga, meditation, and medication. She started sharing her story on social media in the hopes that it would encourage other survivors and make them feel less alone. Since she spent so many years suffering in silence, she has made it her mission to use her voice to advocate for survivors of both sexual and religious abuse. She is currently writing her memoir and hopes to get it published one day.   -------------------------------------------- SUBSCRIBE to the show to be the first to hear about new episodes!   Contact Anne: annemargaretjensen@gmail.com Twitter: @annemargaretj IG: @annemargaretj   Contact Molly: www.theembodyconnection.com // molly@theembodyconnection.com   -------------------------------------------- Special thanks to:   Jenn Baykan, virtual assistant for creatives: https://www.jbaykan.com/   Dave Hiltebrand for intro and outro music original composition: https://www.davehiltebrand.com/   Gina McLaughlin Photography for photo and graphic design: https://www.facebook.com/ginamclaughlinphotography/?fref=tag

    1h 4m
  4. Phil Goldstein shares his perspective and poetry

    29/03/2022

    Phil Goldstein shares his perspective and poetry

    “I like to think that I grew up in a relatively progressive area of the country… but I definitely, by osmosis, absorbed the cultural expectations and ideas of what a man is and should be, and it was definitely not somebody who’d been sexually abused or taken advantage of. And I think that was another factor inhibiting me from talking about it - just not wanting to deal with the consequent shame and humiliation that I’m sure would have come.”   Phil is a poet, journalist, and content marketer whose debut poetry collection, How to Bury a Boy at Sea, will be published by Stillhouse Press on April 5th, 2022 and is available for pre-order (see his website or direct link below). His poetry has been nominated for a Best of the Net award and has appeared in or is forthcoming in The Laurel Review, Rust + Moth, Two Peach, 2River View, Awakened Voices, The Indianapolis Review and elsewhere. He currently lives in Alexandria, Va., with his wife, Jenny, and their animals: a dog named Brenna, and two cats, Grady and Princess.   -------------------------------------------- SUBSCRIBE to the show to be the first to hear about new episodes!   Contact Phil: https://www.philagoldstein.com/ Twitter: @philgoldstein IG: @philagoldstein FB: https://www.facebook.com/philgoldsteinpoet/   Pre-order Phil’s book, How to Bury a Boy at Sea: https://www.stillhousepress.org/stillhouse-store/how-to-bury-a-boy-at-sea   Phil’s book upcoming events (including DC and Chicago, as well as virtual): https://www.philagoldstein.com/book-events   Contact Molly: www.theembodyconnection.com // molly@theembodyconnection.com   -------------------------------------------- Special thanks to:   Jenn Baykan, virtual assistant for creatives: https://www.jbaykan.com/   Dave Hiltebrand for intro and outro music original composition: https://www.davehiltebrand.com/   Gina McLaughlin Photography for photo and graphic design: https://www.facebook.com/ginamclaughlinphotography/?fref=tag

    1h 19m
  5. Lauren Dollie Duke on Her Memoir Sh!thouse, a memoir of  a brutal girlhood

    15/03/2022

    Lauren Dollie Duke on Her Memoir Sh!thouse, a memoir of a brutal girlhood

    “A lot of the work that I’m doing now is because of what happened in the backseat of that car... I would be lying if I said that that is resolved... I am recognizing that I still have a freeze response… It’s taken me nine years of resisting that there was still work to be done from that - because I didn’t want to investigate it… I lived with a very, very deep sense of shame until the last few years… The event plus the shame created this shut-down - a lack of circulation, a lack of life, a lack of movement in the middle part of my body… And even though I couldn’t articulate it, I [began] moving toward something that was regulating my nervous system and making me feel better... So I think it’s this really beautiful dance between the top-down information that I’ve learned and the bottom-up primal work that I’ve been doing. It’s helping me put myself back together.” In this episode, Molly interviews Lauren Dollie Duke about her new memoir, Sh!thouse, which is the story of her own brutal girlhood and her ongoing journey of untangling herself from intergenerational trauma. In this rich conversation, she and Molly explore themes including: Complex/relational trauma and its relationship to sexual trauma The importance of both top-down (cognitive) and bottom-up (somatic/body-based) approaches in healing The idea of “story follows state” and “fake it ‘til you make it” The nervous system, polyvagal theory, and trauma (look for Stephen Porges’s work if you’d like to learn more) The paralyzing potential of sexual trauma and shame and how that might relate to digestive issues, shallow breathing, and an overall lack of pelvic sensation/connection Yoga and breathwork techniques as tools to bring our whole bodies back online Teacher as student and healing as a lifelong journey   Lauren Dollie Duke is a writer, educator, healer, entrepreneur, community activist, and thought leader. She has taught thousands of yoga students over the last 15 years, led dozens of retreats and trainings, and continues to push the edges between yoga, mental health, and trauma. In a sea of corporate yoga, where most independent studios don’t survive, Lauren Duke founded a one-of-a-kind Community-Care/Yoga studio in Encinitas, California, creating a thriving community where she teaches and hosts a variety of beloved yoga classes, educational seminars, and writing workshops.   -------------------------------------------- SUBSCRIBE to the show to be the first to hear about new episodes!   Contact Lauren: lauren@gatherencinitas.com Get her book: theunapologeticvoicehouse.com/lauren-duke/ (also available on Amazon) IG (personal): @dollieduke83 IG (book): @shithousebook FB: Surviving, Healing, and Evolving   Contact Molly: www.theembodyconnection.com // molly@theembodyconnection.com   -------------------------------------------- Special thanks to:   Jenn Baykan, virtual assistant for creatives: https://www.jbaykan.com/   Dave Hiltebrand for intro and outro music original composition: https://www.davehiltebrand.com/   Gina McLaughlin Photography for photo and graphic design: https://www.facebook.com/ginamclaughlinphotography/?fref=tag

    1h 2m

About

This podcast is both a resource for anyone affected by sexual trauma, as well as a tribute to all those who are doing the hard work of healing. This project asks the question “Where do we go from here?” – at both the individual and collective levels. To truly work in the direction of wholeness, we must not only tell the story of what happened to us, but we must also share our stories of healing. That is where we find our strength and our hope – the hope that healing is possible for ourselves, as well as for our society.

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