Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't

Tony Santore
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  • NATURAL SCIENCES
  • EVERY TWO WEEKS
Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't

A show about plants as viewed through the lens of evolution and ecology with a side of deranged ranting, crass humor, occasional profanity, & the perpetual search for the filthiest taqueria bathroom. Plant ecology, systematics, taxonomy, floral chemistry, biogeography and more. Joey Santore was a degenerate railroader for 15 years during which he taught himself Botany by reading textbooks and research papers in the cab of the locomotive while stealing time from work. He has traveled to 11 different countries studying plant communities. He is the host of the YouTube channel Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't and the host of the show Kill Your Lawn on EarthX TV.

  1. A Deep Dive Into Coyote Bush

    5 NOV

    A Deep Dive Into Coyote Bush

    Ads are terrible, Ads are hell, and if they bother you, here's a reminder that you can avoid them altogether by listening to this podcast Ad-Free on the Crime Pays Patreon at : www.patreon.com/crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt The genus Baccharis is one of the largest and most diverse in the Composite Family, Asteraceae. It originated in South America a few dozen million years ago and has diversified and spread throughout South and North America and adapted to a variety of different habitats due to a number of key innovations such as tufted trichomes that secrete sticky wax, the abundant production of wind-dispersed seeds, and rapid growth, among other traits. When I was working for the railroad and frequently visiting abandoned industrial corridors in California, the genus Baccharis was one of the only native plants that was able to hold its own amidst the concrete, pollution and toxic soil of former industrial sites. Today we talk with Baccharis researcher Gustavo Heiden from Southern Brazil about his research and study of this tough and remarkable genus, where it originated and what makes it so successful.

    2h 9m

  2. 25 OCT

    Oklahoma City, Limestone endemism, Relict Habitat of West Texas, and more

    If the ads are annoying, keep in mind all podcast episodes are offered ad-free on the Patreon at :  www.patreon.com/crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt, where you'll also have early access to videos, exlusive access to plant education lectures, and exclusive access to photo dumps from recent plant excursions that are not visible on any of the other Crime Pays Social Media venues. Rants about scrub oaks in the sand dunes of West Texas, 500 million-year-old granite in Lawton Oklahoma and the obesity epidemic aflicting prairie dogs in nearby communities, plants that only grow on Limestone, arbutoid mycorrhizae and symbiosis between madrones and ecomycorrhizale soil fungi, the lack of large-scale native plant growers in Texas, etc. Species featured here :  Stenaria pooleana Quercus aff. gravesii Arbutus xalapensis Cirsium turneri Petrophytum caespitosum Cercocarpus breviflorus Baccharis pteronioides Penstemon baccharifolius Garrya goldmanii Eriogonum hieraciifolium

    1h 18m
  3. Plant Anatomy, Again with Dr. Jim Mauseth

    16 OCT

    Plant Anatomy, Again with Dr. Jim Mauseth

    If the ads are bumming you out, keep in mind that ad-free episodes of the podcast are available at : www.patreon.com/crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt Did you know that the distal ends and tips of roots are the only parts doing any absorption? What the hell are cortical bundles and why did cacti evolve them? How can cactus roots grow so quickly after a rain and what do we mean by "root spurs"?  How does the South American parasitic plant Tristerix aphylla behave like a fungus when it grows inside its host plant? And if you still don't understand what the hell Parenchyma is, here's your chance for a refresher. Dr. Jim Mauseth taught plant anatomy and botany for 30 years at UT Austin and literally wrote a textbook on the subject. He's also written a few other books and over a hundred research papers studying the anatomy of plants with an emphasis on cacti, and has traveled to South America and Mexico studying the family on numerous occasions. In this episode we go deep on plant tissues, plant cells, cellular components, plasmodesmata, cell membranes and how the a plant is technically only one single cell when you really get down to it... A reminder that the previous podcast episode on plant tissues covers some of the terminology in this episode, such as the 3 main tissue types : epidermal tissues, ground tissues (parenchyma, collenchyma, sclerenchyma) and vascular tissue (xylem and phloem). I highly suggest listening to that episode first or at least pausing the podcast if you're unclear about some of the terminology. Remember that tracheids and vessel elements apply only to xylem (which only moves water) and "sieve tubes", "companion cells" and "sieve plates" apply only to phloem (which only moves sugars and photosynthates).  The 3 ground tissues are : parenchyma (primary walls only, large intercellular spaces, alive at maturity), collenchyma (only produces primary cell walls with thickened and re-inforced corners, alive at maturity), sclerenchyma (primary and secondary cell walls, dead at maturity). Thumbnail photo shows the incredibly thick cuticle of Ariocarpus, with epidermis below and hypodermis below that, marked with arrows. Vertical hole on the right side is the stomatal opening in the cuticle

    2h 19m
  4. Plant Tissue Systems Lecture

    12 OCT

    Plant Tissue Systems Lecture

    A reminder: the ads on this podcast (as well as most podcasts) are terrible. You can get AD-FREE versions of this podcast episode on the crime pays patreon (https://www.patreon.com/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt) In this episode:  We talk about the three main types of tissue systems in plants : Dermal (trichomes, guard cells) Ground (Parenchyma, Collenchyma, Sclerenchyma) &  Vascular (xylem and phloem) What the hell are these tissues? Whatta they mean? Whatta they do?

    57 min
  5. Chris Best, State Botanist - USFW

    10 OCT

    Chris Best, State Botanist - USFW

    If the ads are bumming you out, consider joining the Patreon where all podcast episodes are uploaded ad free at : https://www.patreon.com/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt Christ Best is the State Botanist with US Fish and Wildlife Service for the state of Texas, a position he has held for 30 years. He has extensive knowledge of plants in the Rio Grande Valley of South Texas, specifically. He has worked with numerous rare and endangered plant species including Physaria thamnophila, Asclpeias prostrata, Thymophylla tephroleuca and many more. He has also worked with mycorrhizae on cactus roots, propagating rare and endangered species, and navigating the sometimes tenuous relationship with private landowners in the state. In this episode we talk about propagating rare plants, fostering symbiotic relationhips between roots and beneficial fungi and bacteria in the soil microbiome by intentionally innoculating plants in propagation, endangered plants, peyote conservation (or lack there of), how geology can affect the plant species that occur in an area, and what random but interested people can do for plant conservation.

    2h 46m

  6. 8 OCT

    Debunking Charlatans & Posers with Professor Dave Explains

    A reminder: the ads on this podcast (as well as most podcasts) are terrible. You can get AD-FREE versions of this podcast episode on the crime pays patreon (https://www.patreon.com/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt) Dave Farina is the host of the "Professor Dave Explains" youtube channel, an educational youtube series exploring a wide variety of scientific topics and offering free eduational tutorials on subjects ranging from human evolution to organic chemistry to arthropod taxonomy. In recent years, he has published a number of videos debunking pseudo-science quacks, charlatans, creationists, and flat-earthers.  Can't stand the ads? All episodes of the CPBBD podcast are on the Patreon, ad-free, for $5 a month at: https://www.patreon.com/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt

    1h 6m
  7. Archaeology, Texas History and Public Land

    4 OCT

    Archaeology, Texas History and Public Land

    David Keller is a historian and archaeologist from West Texas who based out of Alpine, Texas.

    1h 28m

  8. 3 OCT

    Da Tubes Lecture (Shoots and Roots)

    Originally recorded as a class lecture, this podcast episode contains information on root structures and shoots and is accompanied by the PDF found at :  https://drive.google.com/file/d/1vA_n1OWw2PpUJSqn3m5lbSOymH_aARB7/view?usp=drivesdk as well as chapters 23,24,&25 of "Raven Biology of Plants" textbook which can be downloaded for free on libgen.is in PDF form and read on a tablet. We cover : Apical Meristems, Lateral Meristems (and why monocots don't have any), root caps, cortex, endodermis, pericycle, , xylem, phloem and the components of each.

    54 min
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About

A show about plants as viewed through the lens of evolution and ecology with a side of deranged ranting, crass humor, occasional profanity, & the perpetual search for the filthiest taqueria bathroom. Plant ecology, systematics, taxonomy, floral chemistry, biogeography and more. Joey Santore was a degenerate railroader for 15 years during which he taught himself Botany by reading textbooks and research papers in the cab of the locomotive while stealing time from work. He has traveled to 11 different countries studying plant communities. He is the host of the YouTube channel Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't and the host of the show Kill Your Lawn on EarthX TV.

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