#68 Trans-parent Conversations

Caramelo's daughter Selene joins the podcast to dish about her experience as a trans woman. Selene starts with an inside scoop about herself and her experience coming out as trans. Caramelo weighs in from his perspective as one of her strongest supporters throughout the journey. The pair discuss how Caramelo initially suspected Selene was gay from the mannerisms she displayed at an early age. They recollect the moment she came out to Caramelo and how she was so nervous that she texted her father from across the room about her newfound crush on a boy from school. Selene tells Scarlett about the pressure she felt in her early childhood to conform to the more traditional values of the Catholic school community that she attended. Luckily, she went on to attend a performing arts school in Dallas for her high school years, where she thrived. There, she was able to experiment more freely with how she dressed and presented herself and eventually, by age seventeen, expressed her wish to transition to her parents.

While Selene’s father was always supportive, her experience with her mother was more tumultuous. Selene discusses the challenges of coming out to her mom, who was much less supportive and understanding of her choices. The group discusses how challenging growing up in a religious community can be for those who do not fit into the norms prescribed by the church. Ironically, Selene shares that her mother went on to come out as a lesbian years later and is now married to a woman herself. Selene shares the frustration she felt when she learned her mom had been hiding this information from her, being someone that dealt with a similar ordeal. However, ultimately she feels that her mother’s coming out helped to improve their relationship, as her mom learned to come to terms with herself and found inspiration in the way that her daughter navigated her own journey. Selene goes on to elaborate on how being biracial has impacted her life and discusses how both sides of her family, Caramelo’s Latino side and her mother’s African-American side, dealt with her transition journey. 

Scarlett then takes the opportunity to ask a few questions about the transitioning experience. The group talks about the process of constructive genital surgery and the various options offered. Selene shares the knowledge she’s gained from looking into the vaginal constructive process for herself and they discuss the process and risk factors involved, as well as the risks that Selene faces daily just for being trans. Finally, the group rounds out the conversation by discussing Selene’s preferred methods of sex and how it all works for her down there now.

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