How to Speak Clearly, Calmly, and Without Alienating People | Dan Clurman and Mudita Nisker

10% Happier with Dan Harris

Most of us talk all day long. We speak to each other, we type at each other, and of course, we talk to ourselves internally. Talking and listening is a key part of what it means to be human and It’s very hard to be a successful person if you can’t communicate your ideas and listen to and understand other people. 

Today’s guests, Mudita Nisker and Dan Clurman, are here to explain some very simple and easy to understand communication skills that can transform your life. Their new book, Let's Talk: An Essential Guide to Skillful Communication concisely summarizes their teachings and they’re coming on the show today to walk us through some of the key learnings from this book. 

Over the past thirty years Nisker and Clurman have provided communication training to individuals and organizations in the private, public, government, and nonprofit sectors. They have also led workshops, and trained staff at leading mindfulness centers such as Insight Meditation Society and Spirit Rock Meditation Center. Clurman is a communication coach and professor in the Ageno School of Business at Golden Gate University in San Francisco. Nisker is a licensed marriage and family therapist in private practice. 

In this episode we talk about:

  • Talking vs. listening
  • Content vs. process 
  • The power of saying nothing at all
  • Reflective listening 
  • The Buddhist concept of Right Speech
  • Content goals vs. relationship goals
  • “I” language
  • Provisional language
  • Stating positive intentions
  • Framing
  • And Flooding vs. chunking

You can read an excerpt of the book, Let's Talk: An Essential Guide to Skillful Communication if you subscribe to our TPH newsletter, which comes out every Sunday. And you can subscribe if you go to: tenpercent.com/newsletter.

Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/dan-clurman-and-mudita-nisker-494

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