The Archivist SheShallConquer

What are the types of words you use most often when talking about work?

I have found myself using harsh, abrasive, and aggressive words when talking about my interactions with other people. I find that it extends to the way I think and respond to certain situations at work. I believe I might be treating work as if I am fighting for my own survival, rather than it just being a day job. This probably impacts my brain and my ability to respond to situations with the best of my thoughts, ideas, and empathy. 

Why do you tell stories?

I am busy reading The Whole-Brain Child by Dr Dan Siegel with my mom. One of the points from the book I keep going back to is about how telling stories helps us integrate parts of our brains. Sometimes I struggle with self-doubt and wonder why I tell my stories at all. Perhaps there is a way to think about storytelling, not by looking at the quality of the story, but more by looking at what storytelling does for us and our ability to make sense of the world around us. 

How strongly do you feel about your coffee?

Sometimes I feel I might be too dependent on the substance, so I have tried to create practices that will enhance my appreciation for it. Some days I feel like I depend on it more than others, and maybe sometimes, it becomes more of a prayer for me. 

Have you also felt this sense of groundlessness in the last year? 

At times I have felt stuck or like there isn't much to hold onto. I wonder if I could look at this sense of groundlessness like a plant being repotted into a space with greater opportunity to grow! 

How do you think about breakdowns?

I often look at breakdowns as bad and problematic for my long term well-being, but the other day, when reading through Pema Chödröns Welcoming the Unwelcome, I stopped to examine the way I approach breakdowns. What if, instead of seeing them as I would see the breakdown of a car, I think about them as the breaking of a wave—just as it is?

It is a privilege to talk about difficult and important topics with people that know you and understand you. This is a discussion between me and my university friend, Solo, about what it means to find your feet in a new city. In this case, it's Cape Town. I really appreciated his insights on everything from the idiosyncrasies of a new place to the wild dreams of what life could be when you commit to stepping outside of your comfort zone.

Here are some of my key takeouts


Good things take time
Make use of the small opportunities
Build a space you want to be and live in
Change is difficult but is also an opportunity to learn about yourself
You never know how long you will be in a space

Also, after this conversation, I bought a couch a year after moving in. I'm left asking myself who I want to be and how to support myself in getting there with more kindness and self-compassion.