The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya Studio71

As we approach the peak summertime Bob-B-Que months (zing), we'd like to share Bob the Drag Queen's 8 tips for a successful chicken wing soiree, which will ensure that your fowl party is anything but foul:
1) Send your dinner party invitations by Pony Express or personal messenger at least 10 days in advance. Include a cooked goose or snuff box for extra enticement.
2) Select an appropriate color scheme and harmonize everything on the table within that palette. If an invited guest passes from consumption before the engagement, consider black, brown, or dark grey as a sign of respect for the deceased.
3) Never, and we do mean NEVER, starch your napkins. You will be swiftly rejected from polite society and burn in hell for eternity if you do.
4) Ideal floral centerpieces include roses, lilies, carnations, ferns and smilax. If you are planning a post-dinner orgy, consider using roses in your bouquet and scatter a few extra petals artistically around the table and on the floor, instructing guests where they can begin their erotic adventures after the dessert and cognac course.
5) Hang satin ribbons, bows, and smilax from your chandelier for a striking visual effect of fresh, dainty beauty. During the holidays, you can also hang mistletoe to encourage pre-orgy kissing and heavy-petting.
6) Use colorful gas or whale-oil lamps, as well as transparent globes to produce a dreamscape of hues in the dining room and beyond. If several of your guests border on the rubenesque, remember that whale-oil lamps are a particularly forgiving source of light for those guests who have eaten one-too-many cherry jubilees over the years.
7) It is recommended to have at least one servant available to attend to the needs of every six guests. During the orgy, this ratio should increase to one servant for every three guests.
8) Last, but not least, it is extremely important that all guests are examined by a licensed physician for syphilis, gonorrhea, or symptoms of the plague prior to the orgy.
If you follow these 8 simple rules, we can assure you that come morning, you'll be the undisputed toast of high society!

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Now is the time to make the switch to the best cat food on planet Earth: Smalls! Head to https://Smalls.com/BALD and use promo code BALD at checkout for 50% off your first order PLUS free shipping!
Need a website? Head to https://Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, go to https://www.Squarespace.com/BALD to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain!
This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at https://BetterHelp.com/BALD and get on your way to being your best self!

Follow Bob: @BobTheDragQueen
Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel
Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo

To watch the podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT


Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast


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To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatya.com


To order your copy of our book, "Working Girls", go to: workinggirlsbook.com


To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com



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Feeling down? Need an escape from the grind? Just committed a crime and need to lay low? Captain Sasha Colby and the crew on The Bald & the Beautiful's new cruise ship, "Gettin' Nauti", will whisk you away to melt into the pastel-hued villages that dot the rocky shoreline of Italy's picturesque Amalfi Coast! Like a painter’s palette providing a resplendent contrast to the undulating sea of cobalt blue and the verdant mountains that rise up amongst the mist, join us for a clothing-optional frolic amongst the fragrant lemon groves decorating the dramatic cliffs! As the sun sets and you slowly remove your clothing for an alfresco dinner in the nude, inhale the refreshing scent of the Mediterranean Sea, devour a tender Steak Diane, and finish it all off with an invigorating nightcap next to the glistening waves as you slowly sip a glass of the region’s famous limoncello and a black coffee. Al Di La! Mama Mia!! Molto Bene!!!
To try America's #1 Meal Kit for eating well, go to https://GreenChef.com/BALD50 and use code BALD50 to get 50% off, plus 20% off your next two months!
Take the guesswork out of buying concert tickets with Gametime! Download the Gametime app, create an account, and use code BALD for $20 off your first purchase! Head to https://Gametime.co for more info! Last minute tickets. Lowest Price. Guaranteed.
Stop putting off those doctors appointments and go to https://ZocDoc.com/BALD to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today!
Whether you’re looking for friends, fun or finding the one, download the best dating app for gay men, Archer, today! For more info, head to: https://www.ArcherApp.com
Follow Sasha: @SashaColby
Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel
Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo

To watch the podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT


Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast


If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com


If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast


To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatya.com


To order your copy of our book, "Working Girls", go to: workinggirlsbook.com


To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com



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In the grand pantheon of lusciously loud cackles, there exists two gorgeous human specimens for whom the rules of physics do not even remotely apply. These two auditory angels, known colloquially as Drew Afualo and Trixie Mattel, fly right up to the sonic barrier, spit in its face, and emit laughs at such an octave that only the gods atop Mount Olympus can hear without permanent hearing loss. So close your windows, crank your speakers up to 11, and prepare yourselves for a blisteringly beautiful barrage of chuckles, chortles, and guffaws the likes of which mere mortals have never experienced.
To order Drew's new book, Loud, head to: https://drew-afualo.com
With Chime’s secure credit card, you can improve your credit scores all summer long! Get started today at https://Chime.com/BALD
Climb back on that porcelain throne, and make us proud! Feel the difference, daily, with Ritual’s Synbiotic+. Get 25% off your first month at https://Ritual.com/BALD
Need a website? Head to SquareSpace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, go to https://www.SquareSpace.com/BALD to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain!
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at https://BetterHelp.com/BALD and get on your way to being your best self!
Whether you’re looking for friends, fun or finding the one, download the best dating app for gay men, Archer, today! For more info, head to: https://www.ArcherApp.com
Follow Drew on TikTok & Insta: @DrewAfualo
Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel
Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo


To watch the podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT


Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast


If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com


If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast


To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatya.com


To order your copy of our book, "Working Girls", go to: workinggirlsbook.com


To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com



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As we gather together this week to celebrate America's 248th birthday on rooftops, in backyards, and on sandy beaches, let us indulge ourselves with highly processed, nitrate-filled beef rods, sun-baked mayonnaise-soaked potato salad, and luke-warm hard seltzers. In the true spirit of our nation's independence, we are presenting a carefully curated collection of clips that cover the broad spectrum of important topics we routinely cover on the pod. From rimjobs to fisting to combination rim-fist-jobs, let us all pause for a moment of silence and pray to a heathen god of your choice that the majority of us will make it through the coming firework-laden holiday weekend with the same number of fingers, hands, and appendages that we have today. From all of us here at the Bald Headquarters in an abandoned missile silo outside Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin, we wish you and yours the Hap Hap Happiest 4th of July ever!
Stop putting off those doctors appointments and go to https://ZocDoc.com/BALD to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today!
Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel
Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo

To watch the podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT


Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast


If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com


If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast


To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatya.com


To order your copy of our book, "Working Girls", go to: workinggirlsbook.com


To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com



Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week on KBLD's Schlock & Beautiful Masterpiece Theater, we bring you the preeminent 1973 sexploitation film, Queen of the Amazons starring the one, the only, Naomi Smalls! In the far-away island Hermythia off the coast of Papua New Guinea, there lives a tribe of Amazons who are the epitome of primal power, sexual desire, and goddess-like grace. For centuries, men were kept by these Amazons as sex slaves, used solely for breeding purposes and menial labor. Now, as a cruel band of bloodthirsty female warriors from a nearby island pillage and loot the Hermythian countryside, the oppressed males decide to join the Amazons and fight back! Come for the death, sex, and gratuitous nudity, stay for the occasional hot warrior orgy. Rated NC-17 for long, silky-smooth legs.
Now is the time to make the switch to the best cat food in the world, Smalls! Head to https://Smalls.com/BALD and use promo code BALD at checkout for 50% off your first order PLUS free shipping!
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at https://BetterHelp.com/BALD and get on your way to being your best self!
Take the guesswork out of buying concert tickets with Gametime! Download the Gametime app, create an account, and use code BALD for $20 off your first purchase! Head to https://Gametime.co for more info! Last minute tickets. Lowest Price. Guaranteed.
Whether you’re looking for friends, fun or finding the one, download the best dating app for gay men, Archer, today! For more info, head to: https://www.ArcherApp.com
For more info on the towering gorgeous goddess Naomi Smalls, head to: https://naomismallsduh.com
Follow Naomi: @NaomiSmalls
Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel
Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo

To watch the podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT


Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast


If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com


If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast


To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatya.com


To order your copy of our book, "Working Girls", go to: workinggirlsbook.com


To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com



Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

As the days get longer and the jean shorts shorter, images come to mind of lazy, breezy days on the beach with merlot in a can and a juicy paperback that you simply can't put down. Within this very special episode of Bald with the inimitable Sarah Schauer, resides a collection of literary gold for all manner of readers from young to old and everywhere in between. Running the gamut from erotic worms to Mama Cass to non-fiction to other-worldly fantasy, there is something here to fill every literary need and deliciously erudite desire you may have.
There’s no more shame in your gut game! Synbiotic+ and Ritual are here to celebrate, not hide, your insides. Get 25% off your first month for a limited time at https://Ritual.com/BALD
Want to Kill Your Thirst? Go to https://LiquidDeath.com/BALD to check out all their healthy, infinitely recyclable beverages and find your closest retailer today!
To try America's #1 Meal Kit for eating well, go to https://GreenChef.com/BALD50 and use code BALD50 to get 50% off, plus 20% off your next two months!
Need to find a great doctor? Go to https://ZocDoc.com/BALD and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated doctor today!
Follow Sarah: @SarahSchauer
Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel
Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo

To watch the podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT


Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast


If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com


If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast


To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatya.com


To order your copy of our book, "Working Girls", go to: workinggirlsbook.com


To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com



Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices