The Better Living Blueprint Podcast with Eric Connor, LCPC Eric Connor

Better Living Blueprint
Eric Connor
EP 012 S.T.E.P. Into Intimacy
 
What makes us feel REALLY connected in a relationship?  Is it having fun?  Sharing experiences?  All of the above?  Or what?
 
All relationships will have their ups and downs.  That’s part of life.  But understanding the different foundations and layers that build into a connected relationship are important to understand.  In this episode we will look at these building blocks and how to begin to work on them for our benefit.  Listen to STEP Into Intimacy with Eric Connor.
 
"Emotional intimacy is what makes us feel deeply connected." - Eric Connor
On Having a Connection Sometimes in a relationship you could feel disconnected. That disconnection can become so overwhelming that you doubt the relationship you're in. And so you ask, "Why did we get together in the first place?"
 
You might have had expectations when you started, and thought that it only required minimal effort. The reality is, it can (and usually does!) take a lot of work to maintain that connection.
A Way to Reconnect As time passes, you can feel like you are with a stranger instead of a soulmate.
 
"The things that brought you to a relationship in the first place -- all the good feelings, the characteristics we loved, all the ways that made us feel connected -- they can be captured again." - Eric Connor
 
Is there no way to be reconnected with someone you love? The thing is you don't want to be hopeless. That is why you talk about it.
Stepping into Intimacy It may seem hopeless when the disconnection appears too much. When that happens, you can meet with a therapist to help you out.
 
"Life is so much better when our primary relationship is working at its best." - Eric Connor
 
Receiving therapy is not a sign of weakness. You just want to be as strong as possible.
 
There are times when you can simply resolve a problem on your own, but there are also times when you need someone to talk to and help you out. Eric and his wife are thankful that they did so, too.
 
Download and listen to the entire episode STEP Into Intimacy. Don’t forget to leave us a 5-star rating and review if you enjoyed the show. We would love to hear from you!
 
Let Eric know what you think about STEP Into Intimacy. Connect with him through the links below. Thank you for tuning in!
 
Connect with Eric Connor at the following links:
 
The Better Living Blueprint website
Email: eric@betterlivingblueprint.com
 
Copyright © 2017 Better Living Blueprint
 

 
Better Living Blueprint
Eric Connor
EP 011 Getting Unstuck
 
Everyone has patterns that keep us stuck in a situation. Getting unstuck from it, however, does not just happen overnight. What could be the reason behind it and what steps do you need to take? Tune in!
Stuck in a Situation There are different patterns that can get us stuck in a situation. It could be a routine or a ritual. But there is no shame in admitting them, because they are part of what makes us human.
 
"All of us have patterns that are keeping us stuck and they can take a variety of shapes and sizes." - Eric Connor
 
Ask yourself, what are those things you have been wanting to do? Perhaps you have long wanted to change but couldn't manage to do so.
What It Takes to Be Unstuck In which situation of your life do you feel stuck? Getting unstuck, however, does not just require the decision to change. It also calls for a strategy to implement.
 
"Change doesn't just happen by accident." - Eric Connor
 
Realize that you did not just arrive at the decision by accident. It can come from life, pain, or consequences you experienced.
Step #1: Make the Choice Change is not easy. But if you want it, you have to be clear about it. Something in your life made you decide to do so.
 
"It is very hard to change if you are still very ambivalent." - Eric Connor
 
It might even have taken awhile before you decided to change. And sometimes the best thing that can happen is to be in a more painful situation for you to decide it's enough.
 
Download and listen to the entire episode Getting Unstuck. Don’t forget to leave us a 5-star rating and review if you enjoyed the show. We would love to hear from you!
 
Let Eric know what you think about Getting Unstuck. Connect with him through the links below. Thank you for tuning in!
 
Connect with Eric Connor at the following links:
 
The Better Living Blueprint website
Email: eric@betterlivingblueprint.com
 
Copyright © 2017 Better Living Blueprint
 

Better Living Blueprint by Eric Connor, MS, LCPC, CSAT
On today's episode, Eric Connor discusses What Drives Addictive Behavior Part 2. He takes you to a deeper understanding of the aspects of shame and loneliness. Tune in!  
Dealing with Addictive Behaviors Addictive behaviors are essentially about mood change. We do these addictions to make us feel better. It is important to note, however, that the brain adapts to anything we do.
"The more we do a behavior, the more that our brain and nervous system come to expect it." - Eric Connor
Because the brain adapts to these behaviors, we can feel rather chaotic when we stop them. The brain is hardwired on systems and patterns. It can build its own neural pathways around the things that we do.  
Shame vs Guilt Each person has something that he can be embarrassed about. To feel better, sometimes we can resort to things outside of ourselves. The situation could lead to a point when you want to be in control to avoid hurt.
"Shame is essentially some messages or beliefs about ourselves that feel permanent, defective, and really corrosive." - Eric Connor
According to Eric, shame is different from guilt. Guilt isn't necessarily wrong and can lead to a corrective action. Shame, on the other hand, is much more personal and can lead you to thinking that you are no good.
The Need for Awareness and Openness There exists a need to recognize one's situation. A lot of shame can be unconscious. To know which areas you feel you aren't enough, you can reach out to your support group or to counselors.
"Unless we're aware of (our situation), we might not really know what it is that we struggle with." - Eric Connor
Shame can come from many sources. Often, a shame-based system has secrets. That secrecy can ultimately result to having an addictive behavior.
Download and listen to the entire episode on What Drives Addiction Part 2.
Let us know what you think about What Drives Addiction Part 2. Don’t forget to leave us a 5-star rating and review if you enjoyed the show. We would love to hear from you!
Connect with Eric Connor at the following links:
The Better Living Blueprint website
Email: eric@betterlivingblueprint.com
Copyright © 2017 Better Living Blueprint
 

Better Living Blueprint by Eric Connor, MS, LCPC, CSAT
Eric Connor talks about What Drives Addiction Part 1. He has worked with a lot of addictions, and saw how people use certain behaviors to escape or medicate. They know that it works and that it makes them feel better. Tune in and learn what it means, what creates desire, and how you can handle that type of attachment.
The Root of Addiction Addictions are more than a bad habit. They are about relationships. The cravings and compulsions are almost like emotional responses to the different situations you deal with in relationships.
"Addictions are much more than a kind of behavior or substance." - Eric Connor
Often you may find a lot of resistance to those responses. Nonetheless, it is good to understand that there is always a reason behind them.
Things that People Can Be Addicted To People can be addicted to everything. There are addictions that cannot be controlled and there are those that are just easy to deal with.
"New things are coming out about what people can be hooked on or dependent on." - Eric Connor
 As the years progress, everyone has more access to different things. There is a whole range of addictions, including food, chemical medicators, work, and alcohol.
Why Care about Addiction Addiction is not to be taken lightly. People get treatment because things have gotten out of their control. Some do not need to deal with a lot of changes.
 "Depending on what the behavior is, there is always an impact." - Eric Connor
Whatever type of addiction, there is always a tradeoff. It could impact one's time, finances, and mental energy. Whatever the case, behaviors have a strong thinking component which people connect with.
Download and listen to the entire episode on What Drives Addiction Part 1.
Let us know what you think about What Drives Addiction Part 1. Don’t forget to leave us a 5-star rating and review if you enjoyed the show. We would love to hear from you!
Connect with Eric Connor at the following links:
The Better Living Blueprint website
Email: eric@betterlivingblueprint.com
Copyright © 2017 Better Living Blueprint
 

Better Living Blueprint by Eric Connor, MS, LCPC, CSAT
Are you getting the most out of the goals you have? On today's episode, Eric talks about understanding beliefs that block us with Joe Sanok. Joe is a topnotch speaker, counselor, and podcaster. You may have heard of him on his show Practice of the Practice. Tune in and learn how you too can advance better towards your ultimate goals!
Top Mental Health Specialist for Teens and Adults Joe is a level 2 Gottman-certified consultant. He currently enjoys spending time with his family, but he is still on the move in helping people from all walks of life.
“It's so much fun to help people grow their influence, their income and their impact on the world.” -Joe Sanok
He is primarily focused on working with teenagers and couples. He seeks to help others get better in life, and particularly specializes in mental health.
Content, Strategy and the Person Joe saw how many people want to start a blog to scale their practice. What they tend to overlook is the importance of exposing who they are as clinicians.
“No matter what you are doing in your content, your person should come out in that.” -Joe Sanok
According to him, you need to find your voice for your blog. The fact stays the same regardless of who you are and what you are doing in the field. Your voice is that one thing that will inform the content that you publish.
The Why to Succeed Authenticity is important in any venture you pursue. It is important that you find and understand your "why".
“Oftentimes people just narrow down on one specific ["why" category]. But in reality, they also need to look at all those different areas.” -Joe Sanok
Joe shares that your why could be external, where you desire to spend time with those you love. It could also be internal, where you focus on achieving something which you may not be sure of. Or it could also be societal, where you might want to help the society you belong.
Check out these links about Understanding Beliefs that Block Us with Joe Sanok:
Practice of the Practice website Practice of the Practice consulting To hear about Understanding Beliefs that Block Us with Joe Sanok, download and listen to the entire episode. Don’t forget to leave us a 5-star rating and review if you enjoyed the show. We would love to hear from you!
Connect with Eric Connor at the following links:
The Better Living Blueprint website
Email: eric@betterlivingblueprint.com
Copyright © 2017 Better Living Blueprint
 

Better Living Blueprint by Eric Connor, MS, LCPC, CSAT
On today's episode, Eric Connor talks about knowing and owning our personality type with Erich Kurschat. Erich is the Founder, Director and Connection Coach at Harmony Insights. He shares some classic insights on understanding who you are, connecting with others, and ultimately achieving success in life and career. Tune in!
Fulfillment in Career and Relationships Erich spent around 16 years of working in the corporate world as HR. He left job afterwards and started his own journey as entrepreneur. Yet, he has always been interested in the reason behind people's behavior. 
“I help individuals and organizations have the confidence of meaningful work and productive workplace relationships.” -Erich Kurschat
At Harmony Insights, Erich and his team help others achieve meaningful work and relationships. Which part of your career do you find fulfilling, and who are those people who can help you move forward to success? Erich can guide you through the process.
Bringing Self to the World Erich shares what it means to know who you are and what you want. Even your potential has limitations.
“I don't think that there is too much you can do in life with confidence without first knowing who you are, what you bring to the table, and what value you are to the world and to the person in front of you.” -Erich Kurschat
 The world is more than what you may think it is. At the moment, it could be the person you are speaking with. How you connect with others tells something about you.
The Path That You Take According to Erich, knowing yourself can change the way you connect with others. You can consult with him if you need some help in this area. He has done a lot of career coaching and also serves as volunteer at a career transition facility.
“So much of what makes up of our lives oftentimes just lands in our lap and we aren't as intentional as we are these things.” -Erich Kurschat
He saw how often people start a conversation with the fact that they ended pursuing something because of their friends. To some, someone told them to follow a particular path that they are taking. Nonetheless, it is important to understand that each person is unique. 
Check out these links about Knowing and Owning Our Personality Type with Erich Kurschat:
HarmonyInsights.com Email: erich@harmonyinsights.com Meetup with The Chicago HR Mastermind To hear about Knowing and Owning Our personality Type with Erich Kurschat, download and listen to the entire episode. Don’t forget to leave us a 5-star rating and review if you enjoyed the show. We would love to hear from you!
Connect with Eric Connor at the following links:
The Better Living Blueprint website
Email: eric@betterlivingblueprint.com
Copyright © 2017 Better Living Blueprint