TOTAL MASSACRE

Rowan Kaiser
  • 5.0 (6)
  • FILM REVIEWS
  • UPDATED WEEKLY
TOTAL MASSACRE

TOTAL MASSACRE is a science fiction and action movie podcast hosted by Rowan Kaiser, Kev Koeser, and Carli Velocci!

  1. FEB 12

    Cloud Atlas

    Fiasco month(s) continues with the Wachowskis' and Tom Twyker's masterfiascopiece, CLOUD ATLAS, a film about the indominatible power of the human spirit and also Halle Berry as an evil elderly Korean doctor. Chris Dole guests alongside Rowan and Kev to talk about the movie that is one of the most movies. It's a lot, in fact six different movies, but also most of them seem good! The cast is great! The yellowface is....maybe well-intentioned but that doesn't mean it good. What IS good is the score! Real monkey's paw movie.

    1h 42m

  2. JAN 30

    Metropolis

    Fiasco Month at Total Massacre kicks off with the original overly ambitious sci-fi fiasco, Fritz Lang’s Metropolis. Guest Val McKenna joins Carli and Kev in discussing this movie’s troubled production but also its incredible look and wonderful performances. Listen now, and maybe you too will want to rise up and overthrow your masters.

    1h 23m

  3. 12/23/2024

    Scanners

    Rowan gets a well deserved Cronenbergsmas rest as the helpful spirits of Carli, Kev, and special guest Noel Kirkpatrick discuss Scanners... sort of. We talk about how Scanners is the Cronenberg of past, present, and Cronenbergs yet to come, which actors make the best Scanners face, that one scene (you know the one), plus cool jackets. There’s also a lot of loopy tangents. Enjoy!

    1h 25m

  4. 12/12/2024

    The Fly

    Merry Cronenbergsmas! We're buzzing to bring your our next episode on Cronenberg's classic, THE FLY, a delightfully weird little film about everything that can go wrong when journalists hook up with their sources. Rowan, Carli, and Kev are joined by special guest Carl Garcia to talk about body horror, pacing, Jeff Goldblum's bizarrely perfect delivery, terrible ex-boyfriends, and the second abortion from hell we've covered on the show.

    1h 23m

  5. 12/04/2024

    Videodrome

    Television: good, or bad? This and all other questions surrounding the medium of television will be answered by VIDEODROME and the ensuing TOTAL MASSACRE podcast about VIDEODROME, starring Rowan Kaiser, Carli Velocci, Kev Koeser, and special guest Julie Muncy. These questions include: how far would you go for Debbie Harry? James Woods: sleazy or creepazoid? Is samurai porn the prestige tv of the 80s? And what is this movie actually saying underneath all the things it's saying?

    1h 36m

  6. 11/26/2024

    Bound

    CRIME LESBIAN Month concludes with BOUND, The Wachowskis before-its-time erotic thriller from 1996. It's a well-loved movie for Rowan, Kev, special guest Alex Welch, and...wait, Carli doesn't like it? Well that just got spicy. Actually we're all very respectful and have a frank exchange of opinions about the Wachowskis' eggness, Gina Gershon and Jennifer Tilly's chemistry, Joey Pants kinda taking over the movie, two incredible death scenes, and an incredibly squeaky leather jacket.

    1h 25m

  7. 11/15/2024

    Love Lies Bleeding

    Critical support to women's wrongs, as Crime Lesbian Month continues with 2024's LOVE LIES BLEEDING. It's a nasty little thriller which shows how far Kristen Stewart has come as a weirdo since her TWILIGHT days, and Rowan, Kev, and Carli with special guest Stella Sacco are entirely on board for it. We talk about how it's a horny movie but not a sexy one, the wide variety of mullets on display, and what might have moved it into being a deeper movie but maybe not a better one.

    1h 51m

  8. 11/07/2024

    The Handmaiden

    CRIME LESBIAN CRIME LESBIAN CRIME LESBIAN IT'S CRIME LESBIAN MONTH for Rowan's birthday, and we're kicking it off with Park Chan-Wook's lesbian thriller, THE HANDMAIDEN. Did it preface a decade of pop culture lesbians in the way OLDBOY did revenge action scenes in hallways? Is it one of Park's very best, or very worst, or both? How hot is that amateur dentistry? What's with that guy's eyebrows? Should pornography used as abuse be destroyed even if it's rare? No seriously, the mouth rubbing scene omg.

    1h 35m
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5
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6 Ratings

About

TOTAL MASSACRE is a science fiction and action movie podcast hosted by Rowan Kaiser, Kev Koeser, and Carli Velocci!

Information

  • Creator
    Rowan Kaiser
  • Years Active
    2021 - 2025
  • Episodes
    99
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © a Rowan Kaiser production
  • Show Website
    TOTAL MASSACRE

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