Dear Midlife...

Shelby Bybee and Trinity Greenfield
Dear Midlife...

Listen up, gorgeous! Are you over 40? Are you feeling stuck? The proverbial midlife crisis is for real and we're here to tell you that you don't have to go it alone! The Dear Midlife mission is all about unleashing mind-blowing transformation for fabulous women in the middle. We are here to serve up sizzling inspiration and turbocharged tips and tools to arm you with the power and courage to remember who you are, figure out who in the hell you want to become and chase your passions like a total boss...even if it means kicking those old versions of yourself to the curb. So buckle up, We're all about pushing boundaries, getting cozy with discomfort, and living life without apology. Get ready to conquer with confidence and style!

  1. 4 DAYS AGO

    Ditching the Self-Sabotage and Mastering Your Mindset

    Ever found yourself in the middle of your life thinking, “Wait…is this it?” You've checked all the boxes—career, family, responsibilities—but somewhere along the way, you feel stuck. Like you’re spinning your wheels in the same patterns, wondering why you're not thriving the way you imagined. Maybe it’s the self-doubt whispering in the background. Maybe it's the invisible script of "I'm too old," or "Who am I to want more?" running on repeat. Today’s guest is here to help you break free from that mental loop and step into the version of yourself you've been craving. Meet Mindi Huebner, the Intuitive Mindset Mastery Coach who’s rewriting the rules on personal transformation. She’s not just about positive thinking—she’s about rewiring your brain for real so you can stop self-sabotaging and start living fully. Mindi helps high-achieving women like YOU identify the subconscious beliefs holding them back, crush the mental habits that keep you playing small, and show up with confidence like never before. She’s an IBCP certified NLP practitioner, Clinical Hypnotherapist, and the queen of subconscious reprogramming and today, she’s sharing the exact tools she’s used with countless women to turn them from goal-setters to goal-getters. We’ll dive into her game-changing Mental Rehearsal technique, discuss why negative self-talk is your brain’s worst enemy, and provide tools on how to align your conscious and subconscious minds for unstoppable success. Today, she’s spilling all the tea on the 7 keys to achieving your desires, why visualization is your secret weapon for consistent success, and how to stop "shoulding" all over yourself.  In this episode Mindi teaches us: Mindset is how we THINK about our circumstances and identity is how we show up in relation to the role we are filling in that moment (employee, single mom, parent, sister) and the goal we are trying to achieve. Negative self-talk is the surefire fastest way to self sabotage. This narrative gets embedded within your subconscious and is running the show 95% of the time. So the first step in rewiring your brain is an awareness of this self-talkStop "Shoulding" on yourself! It only feeds your negative narrative. Instead say, "from now on... in the future... next time". We cannot change the past and what has happened. But, when we know better, we can do better.You can align your conscious with your subconscious mind. You first bring awareness to what you want. Think about it. Write down that smart goal and THEN you embed the thoughts into your subconscious with pictures, sounds, and and feelings. Visualize your success through mental practice. Vividly imagine what you want so clearly you can dive into a swimming pool of it. Imagine what it will feel like, what it tastes like.Just show up and do the thing. Do that over and over and then you go from the woman who baked a cake to the baker. The more you show up and do the thing, regardless of the outcome, the more you embody the spirit of the person you want to become. For more of Mindi: Website | mindihuebner.com Instagram | @mindihuebner Mindi teaches us that when you change the way you look at things the things you look at change. That really resonated with me because we are forced to look at things differently in midlife. Not only because we are wiser, but because to stay the same is to stagnate. Midlife can be one of the best times in our lives. It is time to let go of the narratives that have held us back for so long and reframe and rewire the...

    58 min
  2. FEB 3

    Rising Strong and Finding Rebirth After Loss

    Welcome back, beautiful souls. Today's episode is a powerful one. We're diving deep into the messy, complicated, heart-wrenching reality of grief. Not the "just keep busy and you'll get over it" kind — but the raw, unapologetic truth of loss and healing. My guest today is the unstoppable Deb Day, a Certified Master Transformational Health and Life Coach, motivational speaker, and author who knows firsthand what it means to rebuild after profound loss. After losing her husband suddenly at 50, Deb found herself navigating a storm of grief, PTSD, and anxiety. Yet she emerged with a new purpose: guiding high-achieving women to break free from stress, burnout, and the cycles that no longer serve them. She's a change master and cycle breaker with a gift for helping others see what's possible in their lives, even when they're stuck in the darkest chapters. As this episode goes live, I find myself personally connected to this conversation in a way I never expected. My ex-husband, Michael - the father of my two incredible daughters — has just passed away unexpectedly. Our relationship had so much complexity and was layered with love, laughter, and struggle, and while we've been emotionally peeling back these layers for years. His death has brought a wave of grief I didn't see coming. It's not just about mourning him, but also witnessing the pain my daughters are facing, losing their dad far too soon. Grief isn't just about losing someone physically. It can be the loss of a relationship, an identity, your youth, a job, or the version of yourself you thought you'd always be. Deb teaches us that grief, while gut-wrenching, can also be a space for rebirth. She shares how to honor those we've lost by honoring ourselves — taking care of our mind, body, and spirit, one small step at a time. In this episode, we get real about the winding road of grief — the triggers that can knock you sideways when you least expect it and how to hold space for those emotions instead of brushing them under the rug. Deb shares her signature IMPACT Alignment Methodology — a holistic approach to breaking free from self-sabotage, stress, and patterns that hold us back. If you're walking through a season of loss — whether it's a person, a dream, or a part of yourself — this conversation will remind you that healing is possible. You are stronger than you think. And on the other side of grief? There’s growth, resilience, and a life filled with purpose. In this episode, Deb teaches us: We honor the memory of those we have loved and lost by honoring ourselves. Taking really good care of ourselves enables us to more forward one small step at a time.Loss can be a time of growth and rebirth. It is an opportunity to ask ourselves, "who am I", "what is the opportunity for growth" and "what will be the catalyst to help me do that?"We can grieve a loss of any kind. When we go through the midlife transition we may be experiencing the grief of losing our youth, who we once were, children who grow up and leave the house, even our own sense of self. The process for healing these losses is similar to the way we would heal from the loss of a loved one.Grief can stay with you for a long time. From that point forward any loss felt can trigger or reignite the emotions that linger just below the surface. But, identifying those feelings and triggers is one of the first steps on the healing journey.Grief doesn't always entail the loss of a loved one. It can include any loss including the loss of a friendship, the loss of a job, the loss of a grown child leaving the household. These losses all bring with them the same emotions that come with grief and the emotions can be managed in the same way. For more of Deb: Website | debdaycoaching.com Facebook | a...

    46 min
  3. JAN 27

    Owning Your Worth and Redefining Love on Your Terms

    So, here’s the tea: I once dated a guy who had 8 kids (yes...8). He also had a volatile ex, and a demanding job with insane hours. Between late-night hangouts after his shifts and babysitting his two giant dogs (because his place wouldn’t allow pets), I twisted myself into a pretzel trying to keep up with the chaos. Spoiler alert: it didn’t work. We eventually admitted he wasn’t emotionally available, and I had to face the fact that no amount of magnetic chemistry could fix what wasn’t right.  Once I stepped back, I had a major "aha" moment. I wasn’t just drawn to him...I was drawn to the chaos. Growing up in a whirlwind household with 4 kids and two constantly-on-the-go executive parents, chaos was my comfort zone. Add a past relationship with a narcissist into the mix, and I’d spent years hustling for love and validation, convinced that meeting everyone else’s needs was the key to feeling worthy.  Sound familiar? Do you keep finding yourself replaying the same tired dating script—different face, same emotionally unavailable guy? Let me tell you, it’s not just bad luck. It’s about the stories we’re carrying, and until you rewrite them, you’ll keep attracting the same drama in a different package.  But here’s the good news: it doesn’t have to be this way. Enter Soni Pelty, certified relationship coach and founder of Limitless Love with Soni. Soni is the fierce, unapologetic guide you didn’t know you needed. She’s here to help you untangle those toxic narratives, break free from those generational chains, and uncover who you really are—your true, radiant, limitless self. Soni’s story begins with an arranged marriage—a cultural expectation she didn’t question until misery forced her to. Taking a bold step, she became the first in her family to reclaim her power and walk away. Suddenly single in her 40s, she entered the dating world for the very first time. What happened next? Let’s just say it’s a journey of self-discovery, empowerment, and transformation. Through her innovative coaching and personal story, Soni helps women rewrite their love narratives, step into their worth, and attract the deep, soul-nourishing love they deserve. She’s here to show you why settling is never an option—and why soaring is your birthright. Today, she’s spilling all the wisdom that can help you do the same. In this episode, Soni teaches us: Unconditional love starts with loving yourself first, free from societal norms or outdated notions about relationships. You have the power to create the love story you deserve. Feminine energy is about receiving, not doing. Let men step into their natural role as caretakers by creating space for them to give, rather than taking charge of every aspect of the relationship. Instead of focusing solely on what you want in a partner, reflect on the unique qualities you bring to the table. Confidence in your worth sets the foundation for healthier relationships. Your life should be rich with friends, hobbies, and passions. Dating should complement your life, not consume it. Think of dating as one small part of your larger journey. Before dating, define who you are and what you truly want through a personal mission statement. Date from a space of clarity and self-awareness, and explore multiple connections (carousel dating) to find the right fit. For more of Soni: Website | limitlesslovewithsoni.com Instagram | @limitlesslovewithsoni And ladies, stepping into your worth and power won't just enhance your romantic relationships it will elevate your life! Are you ready to step into who you were meant to be and life a life you...

    1h 2m
  4. JAN 20

    Slaying the Menopausal Madness with Holistic Nutrition

    Alright, ladies — let’s talk about the wild ride they don’t prepare you for. The kind where you wake up drenched like you’ve run a marathon, your brain decides to clock out mid-sentence, and you could fry an egg on your forehead from the heat you’re radiating. Yes, I’m talking about that glorious midlife circus known as menopause. But guess what? Life doesn’t have to feel like this crazy-ass, hormone-fueled dumpster fire! Enter today’s guest: the absolute powerhouse of holistic health, Louise Carr! This Certified Holistic Nutrition Consultant is here to help you kick menopause’s butt and do it with confidence, energy, and yes, a little sass. Louise isn’t about just surviving perimenopause; she’s all about thriving through it! With a mission to revolutionize how midlife women tackle these rollercoaster years, Louise uses food as your not-so-secret weapon against hot flashes, night sweats, and brain fog. She believes in the transformative power of whole foods and dense nutrition to turn midlife into your personal glow-up era. Through her online course, Menopause U, she breaks down the craziness of hormonal changes and nutrition like it’s your favorite binge-worthy series — no jargon, no judgment, just practical, empowering info. But here’s the magic sauce — Louise does it all with warmth, empathy, and that ‘I’ve-got-your-back’ vibe. She’s your guide, your cheerleader, and maybe the voice telling you to put down that sad salad and grab something deliciously nourishing instead. Her mission? To boost your energy, protect your health, and keep you living those active, thriving years with swagger. In this episode, Louise teaches us: This is NOT the end of the road. Our bodies and our societies have evolved to live beyond menopause and midlife! We are meant to grow old due to our matriarchal authority within our communities, tribal familial knowledge, and our ability to nurture. In many other countries in the world, midlife women are revered.Estrogen mimicking chemicals in our society, water, daily products have caused perimenopausal symptoms at earlier ages. Women may start to experience these symptoms as early as their mid-thirties and into early forties. It is at this time in which our bodies slow the production of critical hormones like testosterone, progesterone, and estrogen and our bodies go off a 'hormonal cliff' Thelma and Louise style, ya'll!The spikes and crashes of our hormones are what cause the symptoms. These symptoms are exacerbated by the chemicals we use on and put into our bodies. To begin eliminating these toxins, start with your cleaning supplies and replace chemical laden brands with those that have fewer chemicalsMany women hit perimenopause with dietary deficiencies and the biggest deficiency is fiber. Fiber is what binds with excess hormone and carries it out of the body. Without enough fiber, our perimenopausal symptoms are amplified due to excess estrogen that recirculates in our bodiesThere are some foods that bring phytoestrogens into our bodies to mimic the positive influences of estrogen. Chick peas, sesame seeds, flax seeds are a few of these. Instead of "restricting" yourself, ask what "more" nutrient dense foods can you ADD that your body needs. For more of Louise: website | louisecarrnutrition.com IG | @louise.carr.nutrition And ladies...feeding your body is just the start. Are you ready for a midlife makeover? Do you want to get unstuck and create a life you love, body, mind, AND spirit!? If you're ready to flip the script on menopause and reclaim your midlife mojo, find us on Facebook and follow us on...

    1h 1m
  5. JAN 13

    Becoming the Hero of Your Own Story

    Writer John Barth is quoted as saying "Everyone is necessarily the hero of his (or her) own life story." Our guest today, Bambi Lynn reminds us that THIS...this is because we have all survived our own stories. The events that have happened in the past have shaped who we are today and have taught us to be resilient. And Bambi didn’t just survive the chaos; she THRIVED and THEN she wrote about it — twice! And guess what? She’s just getting started. Bambi has come through the fire...we're talking about empty nests, broken hearts, and moving across the damn country to start over… with nothing but a notebook app, a beach, and a burning need to tell her story. This mama of SIX adult kids and grandma to THIRTEEN grandbabies went from feeling like a lonely transplant in the middle of nowhere to blooming, thriving, and building a tribe of fierce, fabulous women who know what struggle tastes like — and who refuse to let it define them. Not only does Bambi carry with her her own story, but the stories of countless others which she acquired working for the Neilson Ratings, which required her to go into the homes of strangers on a daily and regular basis and, there, she would hold space for the stories of the women and families she encountered in that role. She reminds us that everyone has a story and through the power of shared stories comes understanding and rebirth. So grab your coffee, your wine, or whatever fuels your fire, because today we’re diving into how storytelling heals, why loneliness doesn’t get the last word, and how sometimes, the only way to find your roots is to let go of everything that’s holding you back.  In this episode, Bambi teaches us: We have survived our own stories. The things that have happened to us in the past, have shaped who we are today and have developed our ability to be resilient. So, continue to go through the muck, the trials and tribulations...but, don't stay there.Choose your friends by finding people you admire and aspire to be like. Spend time with people who will elevate you. Who you spend time with is what you'll become in 5 years.Find out what your name means and embrace the characteristics that can define you in a way that you value and gives you strength. It is part of who you are.Keep talking. Keep going. Keep persisting. Keep pursuing. You get a voiceEveryone has a story. Allow your story to be heard and listen to other's stories, without judgement. It can be life changing. For more of Bambi: Website | Healingthroughstories.com Facebook | bambi.lynn Instagram | @lynn.bambi TikTok | healingthroughstories Thank you so much to Bambi for reminding us that we all have a story and that our stories MATTER. We want to hear your story. Because, when we share our stories, there is power in our vulnerability. There is power in shared circumstance. There is power when women come together and we want to be that catalyst...that hub for community and conversation. Find us on Facebook and follow us on Instagram. We want to hear your story. So join us on this midlife journey. Because it is so much better when we do midlife together!

    53 min
  6. JAN 6

    Forty Drinks...Forty Conversations...One Midlife Awakening

    We’ve all been there...looking a monumental birthday strait in the eyes thinking, “Yeah, no thanks. Hard pass on the balloons and forced cheer.” That’s exactly where our guest, Stephanie McLaughlin, found herself — staring down 40 and realizing she was in no mood for some cookie-cutter party. So, instead of throwing some cliché party for her 40th birthday, she launched her Forty Drinks Project — 40 drinks, 40 people, 40 places. No deadlines, no pressure, just Stephanie reconnecting with people who’d been part of her wild ride through life. Think of it as her own sassy spin on that old TV show “This Is Your Life” — except with fewer cringey moments and way more real talk. What started as a boozy adventure turned into a year-long transformation. Conversations...reconnections...truths she didn’t even know she needed. And by the end? Her life had done a total 180. Every conversation, every reconnection peeled back layers she didn’t even know were there. She didn’t just mark her 40th; she redefined it. Stephanie turned 40 into a damn midlife awakening. What were her revelations, you ask? She realized that in our 20s and 30s, we shrink, we defer, we ignore our gut feelings. But when the midlife awakening hits (around 40-ish), your intuition starts knocking. If you try to ignore it, it’ll go from a gentle tap to a full-on, no-holds-barred smackdown until you finally get the message. And that message? Baby girl..It’s all about trusting yourself. Yes, it’s uncomfortable. Yes, it’s scary. But here’s the truth bomb: your instincts are your personal GPS, and they don’t need validation from anyone else. Following them might lead you down paths you’ve never seen before — but that’s where the magic happens. Today, she’s spilling the tea (or maybe the martini) on how this project woke her up to the power of midlife transitions. We’ll talk about how embracing your intuition and shaking off those old “shoulds” can lead to breakdowns, breakthroughs, or — if you're lucky — a little of both. So grab your drink of choice and get ready, because Stephanie’s about to show us how to navigate midlife with challenge and cheer and, maybe, change your life in the process. In this episode, Stephanie teaches The midlife transition marks a shift from relying on advice from external sources — friends, family, media, and mentors — to embracing our own internal wisdom, experience, and intuition to guide our decisions and shape our lives.We close off parts of ourselves in our 20s and 30s to defer to these external messages. Part of the midlife awakening is starting to listen to what bubbles up in our own intuition.It is a process. We need to tune into ourselves and we need to start weighing the "shoulds" with what our bodies, internal "information systems" and intuition are telling us is right for US.If you don't wake up and stop paying attention to the external voices, our own internal voice will come with a whisper and get louder until it hits you with full force with a message that cannot be mistaken. And when you learn to listen to your instincts, they will never steer you wrong.There's bravery that comes with following your instincts because they will take you down a path that you've not been down before and that feels uncomfortable To follow Stephanie: Website | fortydrinks.com Instagram | @fortydrinks Here's the deal, ladies. We all have those moments in life when we look in the mirror and wonder who is that woman staring back at me. We all lose ourselves sometimes. But, in those moments...like Stephanie...we can make a choice. We can allow us to let life get us down OR we can lean into the discomfort, make

    57 min
  7. 12/30/2024

    Using Astrology As Your Midlife Mirror

    Ladies! Gather around because today we’re throwing it back and diving deep into the cosmos. Remember the thrill of flipping through the glossy pages of Teen Magazine, Tiger Beat, or Seventeen? Oh yes, those paper relics (pre-digital takeover, IYKYK). I don't know about you, but it was a sacred ritual of mine to check my horoscope to see if the stars had finally aligned for that hot crush to NOTICE me. Cute then, but let’s be real — we didn’t know astrology’s true power. Well, buckle up, because our guest today, Suzanne Gerber, is here to drop some serious cosmic truth bombs. Suzanne isn’t just dabbling in stardust — she’s a classically trained modern astrological counselor who knows how to make the stars make sense. Her own journey started young, with an Ouija board session that revealed her late grandmother’s Hebrew name. (Talk about mystical origins!) And here’s the tea: If you’re in midlife and wondering why you feel a bit… stuck, lost, or like you’re just wandering around in a cosmic fog — it’s not just you. Enter: the planetary return of Chiron, aka the “wounded healer.” Suzanne teaches us that this powerful planetary return during midlife is stirring up all kinds of old wounds and patterns. But don’t panic! Because, just like we’d never leave the house for a big event without checking ourselves in the mirror first (lashes on point, outfit on fire), astrology is our soul's mirror. It reflects the shifts, changes, and possibilities in our lives — and then we get to decide how to navigate them. Think of it this way: Every movie boils down to 9 main plots, but the details make each story unique. Your life? Same deal. The planets may set the stage, but Suzanne shows us how to finesse the script, embrace our journey, and own our midlife magic. In this episode, Suzanne teaches us that: Modern day astrology focuses on the intersection of the acceptance of the immortality of the human soul and our psyche to provide guidance on how to best navigate our present day challenges. Astrology doesn't make us do things. Instead, view it as a "drop down" menu on a website. It is a menu of options that we can choose from. It is the astrologists job to help you evaluate the choices by knowing who YOU are as an individual.If you had a big event to go to, you wouldn't get dressed in the closet in the dark and walk out the door without ever looking in the mirror. Instead, you'd look in the mirror and make minor adjustments. Astrology can be that mirror in which your life is reflected so that you can make minor adjustments along the way.Around midlife our lives are impacted by a celestial being known as Chiron that represents our deepest traumas and the healing of these wounds. Therefore it is no surprise that at this time in our lives we become reflective of these things. So, if you were born between 1968-69 thorough 1976-77, you may likely be experiencing this phenomenon.If you know your sun sign (what you read about in your horoscope), your moon sign and your rising sign, this is a good place to start because it give you perspective on your natural tendencies. Suzanne likens astrology to movie plots...all movies can be boiled down to 9 (basic) plots...but, the details matter and make each movie unique. It is the same in life. While we all fall into one of these astrological signs, our how we each approach life is unique and different. Being aware of your tendencies or "default settings "and reflecting on how you approach life and being self-aware of what you want to do differently is how you can change your life and harness astrology to do so. To find more of Suzanne: Website | starsandstoneshealing.com Facebook: a href="https://www.facebook.com/suzanne.gerber" rel="noopener noreferrer"...

    58 min
  8. 12/23/2024

    Ditching the Hot Mess Express and Finding Your FLOW

    When the hell did it happen?! I mean, I think I'm a pretty friggen fun and FUNNY person. But, how easy is it to get caught up in the rat race and lose our spark? As women and mothers we shoulder so much! We juggle jobs, calendars (for ourselves, our partners, our kids), snack duty, home schooling (if that's your jam) laundry, life, doctors appointments, school lunches, I mean...the list goes on and ON...think about the duties and responsibilities of motherhood that you carry. But, here's the kicker, girls...these are the things that are sucking away our will to live and leaving us as depleted puddles in the corner unable to even speak. What is happening here? I mean-didn't we jump into motherhood with both feet because of the sheer and utter joy we expected to receive from these little humans that we grew inside of our bodies?! Because of the love we wanted to feel when only mommy can kiss that boo boo to make it all better or when your little looks deep into your eyes and says "I love you"? But, I don't know about you...when I look into the mirror it is not love and joy I see on my face. It is the stress and gray hair that comes with this under appreciated job! So, HOW do we as mothers lose our joy? Why do we suddenly find ourselves overtaxed, under valued and hating life? What can we do to reclaim a small bit of that woman we once were...even among the chaos and constant pace that comes with motherhood? Our guest today, Vanessa Wright, is here to help us jump off the carousel of craziness and find our FLOW. Vanessa is a published writer, certified life coach, and speaker. Her expertise centers around supporting midlife mothers in reclaiming their energy, joy, and creativity using her "FLOW" self-care method. She created this method in 2018 for herself, began sharing about it on Instagram—and it snowballed! FLOW stands for Feed your body, mind, and spirit; Love yourself and your season of life; Own your time and space; Weed out what's not working; and welcome something new. And let me tell you, ladies. It's not just for burned out mamas. If you are struggling, exhausted, and don't know who you are anymore, you can go with the FLOW too! So, join us as we dive into the practice of creating a sustainable self-care practice because your life depends on it! Pedicures and hot baths will never be enough to wash away the stress and burdens that we as women hold ourselves accountable to. When you find your FLOW you will be better able to navigate midlife with confidence and grace. In this episode, Vanessa teaches us: To survive motherhood mayhem, find your FLOW: F = Feed your mind, body, and spirit, L = Love yourself, O = Own your time and space and W = Weed out what's not working and welcome something new.You have 5 minutes every day. Take it and claim it for yourself.When weeding out the commitments you've made to others (we're not talking laundry and dishes here, ladies) that are no longer serving you ask, "is this bringing creativity, energy or joy to your life?" If the answer is "no", you may want to consider removing this activity from your life.Keep a joy journal by documenting one thing each day that brings you joy. Jot them down just before you go to bed each night. This will help you remain in the present and enjoy the small moments in the now.Lean into the season of life. Focus on where you are today and do what you can now. Too many of us spend far too much time focusing on the maybe's or what if's of the future. Be present while slowly laying a foundation for the future. Ask yourself what do you need in THIS SEASON..for example, what you need to feel supported in the summer months when kids are home may be different from the spring. Evaluate where you

    56 min

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4.8
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About

Listen up, gorgeous! Are you over 40? Are you feeling stuck? The proverbial midlife crisis is for real and we're here to tell you that you don't have to go it alone! The Dear Midlife mission is all about unleashing mind-blowing transformation for fabulous women in the middle. We are here to serve up sizzling inspiration and turbocharged tips and tools to arm you with the power and courage to remember who you are, figure out who in the hell you want to become and chase your passions like a total boss...even if it means kicking those old versions of yourself to the curb. So buckle up, We're all about pushing boundaries, getting cozy with discomfort, and living life without apology. Get ready to conquer with confidence and style!

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