60 episodes

On the Divorce Survival Guide Podcast we have open and honest conversations about co-parenting, separation, divorce, and the hardest question of all, should you stay or should you go?
Hosted by Kate Anthony, your Divorce Survival Guide.

The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast Kate Anthony, CPCC

    • Self-Improvement

On the Divorce Survival Guide Podcast we have open and honest conversations about co-parenting, separation, divorce, and the hardest question of all, should you stay or should you go?
Hosted by Kate Anthony, your Divorce Survival Guide.

    Intimacy, Sex, and Divorce: The Naked Truth with Leslie Morgan Steiner

    Intimacy, Sex, and Divorce: The Naked Truth with Leslie Morgan Steiner

    This week we are talking all about sexuality and intimacy after divorce. My guest is Leslie Morgan Steiner, a New York Times best-selling author, columnist for The Washington Post, speaker on work/family balance, successful corporate executive – and domestic violence survivor. 
    Two truths can co-exist. You can be relieved your soon-to-be ex is moving out and grief-stricken at the same time. You can be happy and sad, at the same. This is part of the complexity of human emotions. There’s nothing wrong with you for experiencing a wide range of them. There is nothing wrong with you.  Nobody knows this better than Leslie.
    Leslie’s memoir, Crazy Love, is an account of her violently abusive first marriage. It's about this kind of complexity, how we can deeply love and deeply fear one person at the same time. Her latest memoir, The Naked Truth, explores these dualities as well as she writes about female sexuality, self-esteem, and dating after 50. 
     Show Highlights
    The power of sisterhood and how women are always an inspiration to other women (3:18) Coming out of a marriage desexualized and losing touch with your sexuality (6:00) Perfection has nothing to do with sexuality (12:00) Getting to a point where you can enjoy and love sex (15:00) The stigma and shame around having sex after divorce if the divorce has not been finalized (22:38) Women who are vulnerable to abusers, how to break the cycle; and Leslie shares her story of domestic abuse (28:14) Why learning how to trust yourself again rather than trusting others is paramount following an abusive relationship (33:23) Leslie drops this truth bomb: “I can’t look for a man to heal me.” (38:00) Men struggle with intimacy just as much as women do (39:00) Leslie shares her thoughts on coaxing a man to fall in love with you (42:00) The myth of Prince Charming is destructive to women and unfair to men too (49:09) Learn More About Leslie:
    Leslie Morgan Steiner is the author of four nonfiction books: the New York Times bestselling memoir Crazy Love; the critically acclaimed anthology Mommy Wars: Stay-at-Home and Career Moms Face Off on Their Choices, Their Lives, Their Families; The Baby Chase: How Surrogacy is Transforming the American Family; and her latest memoir, The Naked Truth, which explores female sexuality, self-esteem and dating after 50. 
    From 2006-2008 she wrote over 500 columns for the Washington Post’s popular on-line work/family column, “On Balance.” She currently writes the Two Cents on Modern Motherhood column for ModernMom.com and MommyTracked.com. Her writing has appeared in Glamour, Psychology Today, Redbook, The Washington Post, the New York Times and other publications.   
    Steiner holds a BA in English from Harvard College. Her first job was writing and editing for Seventeen Magazine. After graduating from Wharton in 1992 with an MBA in Marketing, she launched Splenda Brand Sweetener internationally for Johnson & Johnson. She returned to her hometown of Washington, DC in 2001 to become General Manager of the 1.1 million-circulation Washington Post Magazine, a position she held for five years. 
    Steiner is a regular guest on The Today Show, National Public Radio, ABC, NBC, CBS, and cable news networks. She has appeared in Newsweek, BusinessWeek, Elle, Parents, Self, Vogue, Vanity Fair, The Los Angeles Times, and CNN.com.  She is a frequent speaker and consultant on the subjects of marketing to moms and ending family violence. Her 2012 TEDTalk about domestic violence has been viewed by over five million people, and in 2014 she completed her second TEDTalk exploring the ethics of global surrogacy.  
    She serves as a board member for the One Love Foundation, in honor of slain University of Virginia senior Yeardley Love. 
    Leslie Morgan Steiner lives in Washington, DC, New York, and New Hampshire. 
    Resources & Links:
    Leslie’s web

    • 54 min
    When to Give Up The Authentic Fight

    When to Give Up The Authentic Fight

    I asked a friend who is going through a divorce what I should talk about on this week’s episode. He said I should talk about cravings. 
    And he offered what he meant by saying this, “Given the shit happening in the world, we turn to safety, fantasy, and imagination to numb our true selves and we give up the authentic fight.” How beautiful is that?
    There is so much happening in the world right now. 
    And my friend is right, we numb out as a way to escape. We numb with food, drinking, or shopping. When it comes to relationships, we numb out by fantasizing about other people; hoping they are the cure for a troubled marriage. Turning to other people, places, or things will not lead you to true fulfilment. Doing so simply covers up the pain, momentarily. 
    Succumbing to cravings is giving up the authentic fight. 
    What happens if you just sit still with all of the shit that is happening in your life; what if you gazed into all of your own holes and examined them for what they are? What if? 
    What might be possible for your relationship, for your marriage, or most importantly, for you? That’s what I am talking about this week on the podcast. I hope you tune in. 
    Here are just a few of the topics I touch on in this episode:

    Why a marriage is not responsible for fulfilling you 100% Discernment work is so complex, but necessary The importance of recognizing your own ‘made-up’ stories and changing the narrative The Ultimate Divorce Survival Guide
    Should I Stay or Should I Go Facebook Group

    • 24 min
    The Power of Letting Go with Jill Sherer Murray

    The Power of Letting Go with Jill Sherer Murray

    Wouldn’t you just love the superpower of letting go? If so, you’re in luck! Jill Sherer Murray is a TEDx speaker and influencer, author, blogger, coach, and founder of Let Go For It®, a lifestyle brand dedicated to helping individuals let go for a better life. Jill is my guest on the podcast this week and she’s going to share all about harnessing the power of letting go.
    Yes, letting go can feel risky and downright scary.
    And, letting go is a challenge. 
    Especially when you’re contemplating divorce or going through divorce. 
    Jill said something pretty powerful during our time together, “If you figure out how to let go, you can find your way out of or to anything.” So today she’s going to share some ways that you can begin to move forward in your life. 
    Afterall, this is your one wild and precious life. If you’re waiting for someone to give you permission to live it, you’re not gonna get it. You have to take permission to live it yourself. This includes permission to let go, permission to immerse yourself in self-love, and permission to live your life as you see fit. 
     Show Highlights
    How ending a 12-year relationship was eye-opening and transformational for Jill (6:15) What letting go truly is and the importance of acknowledging what you need to let go of before you can take action (14:36) We talk about a simple yet powerful exercise which walks you through the process of letting go (26:41) Why letting go is real freedom and how the act of self-love empowers us to act boldly (29:37) Where women struggle most when it comes self-love and letting go (36:33) When we don’t do the work, we are agreeing to let other people to decide what we have and what we don’t have (44:51) Let go of being so hard on yourself, let go of other people’s expectations, and let go of being afraid of what you truly want (50:03) Learn More About Jill:
    Jill Sherer Murray is a TEDx speaker and influencer, author, blogger, coach, and founder of Let Go For It®, a lifestyle brand dedicated to helping individuals let go for a better life. She is also an award-winning journalist and communications leader who can trace practically every success she’s had in her career, love life, and more to letting go.  
    Her TEDx talk, “The Unstoppable Power of Letting Go” has been viewed by almost two million people – and grows by the thousands each day. Her book, which comes out in May and is available for pre-order on Amazon and Indiebound, is called Big Wild Love: The Unstoppable Power of Letting Go. She wrote it in response to the countless numbers of viewers who’ve reached out to her for help and inspiration after seeing her TEDx talk.  
    Jill spent a year studying improvisation comedy at the famous Second City Training Center in Chicago. And another five years writing a popular blog called “Diary of a Writer in Mid-Life Crisis” for www.wildriverreview.com. She also let go of just about everything to put her weight in Shape Magazine—12 times—as part of a year-long assignment to document her weight loss journey for millions of readers. 
    Resources & Links:
    Jill’s website
    Jill on Facebook
    Jill on Instagram
    Jill on LinkedIn
    The Unstoppable Power of Letting Go TEDx
    A Special Gift from Jill: If you’re struggling like I was in a relationship, not sure whether to hold on or let go, take comfort in knowing that the truth inside you knows the answer. And I have something to help you crack that truth. It’s a simple exercise you can do in just 11 minutes. Get it here: https://bit.ly/31Z9G1U

    The Ultimate Divorce Survival Guide
    Should I Stay or Should I Go Facebook Group

    • 56 min
    Rooted: Step Into Your Power

    Rooted: Step Into Your Power

    Recently in my Facebook Group for women deciding if they should stay or go in their marriage, I asked the members to share their most burning questions about divorce. And I received an overwhelming response. The topics ranged from, “How can I leave my marriage if I have no emotional support and can’t support myself financially?” to “What do I do if I don’t have the courage to leave him?” 
    And, every single topic or question had an underlying theme, all relating to doing work on yourself first. 
    When you are making a decision to leave your marriage, you're making a decision of great love for yourself and for your children. That power needs to carry you through to the other side. 
    When you do the self-work, you can come from a place of neutrality, process your emotions, and grieve what needs grieving.
    You can work hard to bring yourself to a place of calm, peace, and lack of blame or resentment so you can make difficult choices. Without focusing on self-work first, the choices you have to make will be much harder (and trust me, they are hard enough as it is).
    In this episode I go over some of the topics the women in my Facebook group mentioned (btw, join us!). Plus, I share how you can become deeply rooted in your own sense of power. 
    Here are just a few of the topics I touch on in this episode:
    Getting rooted into your deepest power and grounded in your confidence
    How to start fresh on your own when you’ve never been on your own before
    Knowing you are worthy and you are enough
    ROOTED LIVE is coming!  If you think you might want out of your marriage, but you can’t seem to find the courage to make a decision once and for all, and you’re scared you won’t have the strength to get through all that comes after you say those four words,"I want a divorce,” then ROOTED is 100% for you.
    ROOTED is my online coaching program which I will be taking LIVE in February.  It’s designed to help you FIND YOUR STRENGTH, BUILD YOUR CONFIDENCE, AND STEP INTO YOUR POWER. Learn more here.

    • 25 min
    Calling In "The One" with Jennifer Butler

    Calling In "The One" with Jennifer Butler

    This week I welcome Jennifer Butler to the Divorce Survival Guide podcast. Jennifer Butler, MSW, is a certified Calling in “The One” coach, certified health coach, writer, and podcast host dedicated to helping people fall deeply in love with themselves and awaken to their own internal power to create joy, love, and freedom in their lives.
    In fact, Jennifer recently interviewed me for the podcast she hosts for Worthy, Divorce and Other Things You Can Handle.
    Let’s talk about showing up and being a victim for a moment. When it comes to divorce, it doesn’t matter how much of a ‘victim’ of your circumstances you are, you still have a personal responsibility to show up in the world with grace and dignity. The work that Jennifer and I talk about in this episode will help you to stand in and reflect on your own truth. 
    When you show up in your life in a different way and when you allow yourself to dream about what is possible; you will begin to learn how to believe in your ability to create it. 
     Show Highlights
    This week I welcome Jennifer Butler to the Divorce Survival Guide podcast. Jennifer Butler, MSW, is a certified Calling in “The One” coach, certified health coach, writer, and podcast host dedicated to helping people fall deeply in love with themselves and awaken to their own internal power to create joy, love, and freedom in their lives.
    In fact, Jennifer recently interviewed me for the podcast she hosts for Worthy, Divorce and Other Things You Can Handle.
    Let’s talk about showing up and being a victim for a moment. When it comes to divorce, it doesn’t matter how much of a ‘victim’ of your circumstances you are, you still have a personal responsibility to show up in the world with grace and dignity. The work that Jennifer and I talk about in this episode will help you to stand in and reflect on your own truth. 
    When you show up in your life in a different way and when you allow yourself to dream about what is possible; you will begin to learn how to believe in your ability to create it. 
     Show Highlights
    What Calling In “The One” is all about (4:16) One big shift that’s really important is to move from needing a connection from a wounded place to wanting to share a connection from a place of abundance within yourself (8:11) The 7 week process to attract the love of your life; including letting go of any blocks standing in your way of harnessing your internal power (9:00) The stories we show up with in our lives that are holding us back (11:06) Some common misconceptions around doing the work; plus learning to fall in love with the process of discovering (20:04) The labels and toxic ties we make that carry weight and keep us from moving forward, like labeling someone as the love of your life; plus how to navigate away from a label (26:00) Build on and nurture our deeper truths by learning new ways of showing up; like learning to be vulnerable and asking for help (30:00) Healing the disappointed dream, setting bold intentions, and creating a vision for your future (34:00) Learn More About Jennifer:
    Jennifer Butler, MSW is a certified Calling in “The One” coach, certified health coach, writer, and podcast host dedicated to helping people fall deeply in love with themselves and awaken to their own internal power to create joy, love, and freedom in their lives. Beyond an extensive education, Jennifer has also gone through a very powerful transformation, overcoming obstacles and challenges in her own life that greatly inform and influence her work. As a love and relationship coach, Jennifer teaches clients to identify and transform internal obstacles and expand their capacity to love and be loved so they can create the happy and healthy relationships they deeply desire. As a writer, Jennifer provides an honest and authentic account of her own life experiences with the intentio

    • 57 min
    Not Your F*cking Job

    Not Your F*cking Job

    A few weeks ago, I posted in my Facebook group that I was going to write a flip book called, Not Your F*****g Job. And it was going to be a very simple book about all the things that are not your f*****g job to do for your spouse or partner. You know, things like:

    Helping him heal his childhood wounds?
    NOT YOUR F*****G JOB.
    Teaching him how to be a good parent?
    NOT YOUR F*****G JOB.
    Proving your worth or proving your love to him?
    NOT YOUR F*****G JOB.

    Or keeping him from cheating on you?
    NOT YOUR F*****G JOB.
    You get the idea. 
    Well, in this week’s episode I am going to go through about 8-10 scenarios of things that are not your f*****g job and explain why you need to stop carrying allll of the weight in your relationship.  
    After you listen to this episode; if you realize you are doing these things, understand you are doing them out of some need to control.  So what IS your job: to uncover why you’re doing these things and then work to fix it, for you — not for him or for anyone else, for you. Only in this way will you have a chance at healing your marriage, or having an amicable divorce.
    Here are just a few of the topics I touch on in this episode:
    Why it’s not your job to heal your partner’s childhood wounds  Allowing your partner to make mistakes and clean up his (or her) own messes A reminder that it is not your job to beg him to love you or treat you well Why it’s not your job to lose weight, gain weight, dye your hair or get a boob job in order to feel as though you are enough for someone. Only do these things if you WANT to, for you!  What IS your job in your relationship Resources & Links:
    ROOTED LIVE is coming!  If you think you might want out of your marriage, but you can’t seem to find the courage to make a decision once and for all, and you’re scared you won’t have the strength to get through all that comes after you say those four words,"I want a divorce,” then ROOTED is 100% for you.
    ROOTED is my online coaching program which I will be taking LIVE in February.  It’s designed to help you FIND YOUR STRENGTH, BUILD YOUR CONFIDENCE, AND STEP INTO YOUR POWER. Learn more here.

    Fed Up, Gemma Hartley
    Co-Dependent No More, Meldoy Beattie
    DSG Episode: NOW...he wants to go to therapy?

    • 29 min

Customer Reviews

amy speek ,

Kate Anthony

Oh ... my... God!! As a therapist I absolutely love Kate and her rigorous honesty! She is on point, inspiring and passionate about what she does. She embodies the very reason i became a therapist... taking your trauma, learning the lesson and giving back. Making sense of something that at one time felt irreparable. She is a gift and a light in healing.

CaliGal44 ,

One of my favorites!

As a divorce attorney I love to recommend Kate’s podcast to clients and friends. She knows what she is talking about and delivers advice and wisdom with blunt humor. What could be better than that?!?

Coffee&Pods ,

Love Kate’s advice!

I really love the solo episodes Kate does. She knows what she is talking about! Just listening to one of her episodes gave me the push to make a decision on should I stay or should I go. Her words are comforting and helped me feel confident in my decision. Great advice and will keep listening as I’m just starting on this new journey of divorce. Also, she’s hilarious and I love that about her. :)

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