You Are Not Crazy

Jessica Knight
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You Are Not Crazy

You’re exhausted from over-functioning, always managing the chaos just to make it seem okay. You feel alone. Misunderstood. Like no one sees the full story—except you. Your friends don’t get it. You question yourself constantly. You wonder if you're the problem. You're not. I understand—because I’ve been there. I know what it’s like to be stuck in an emotionally abusive relationship, gaslit into silence, and walking on eggshells every day. This podcast is here to help you feel seen. To help you make sense of the confusion. To show you that you're not crazy—and you're not alone. Whether you’re navigating narcissistic abuse, trauma bonding, or post-separation control, you’ll find clarity, validation, and language for what’s actually happening. This is your space to reclaim your truth and begin healing—on your terms. 🖤 Learn more and find resources at www.emotionalabusecoach.com

  1. 2D AGO

    The Manipulation I Didn’t See—Until I Did

    In this episode, I share the story that shaped everything: how I ended up in an emotionally abusive relationship, how I stayed, and how I finally saw it for what it was. This is the manipulation I didn’t see—until I did. I talk about the slow unraveling of my reality, the gaslighting, the shame, the trauma bond, and the hope that kept me stuck. I explain how I lost myself piece by piece, how I started to map the cycle, and what it took to finally break free. If you’ve ever felt confused, blamed, minimized, or like nothing you do is ever enough, I hope you hear your own clarity in this episode. You're not overreacting. You're not imagining it. You're not the problem. You’re waking up—and once you see it, you can’t unsee it. Thank you for being here with me. I hope my story helps you see yours more clearly. Support the show *New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach Email: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com {Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist {Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal {Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

    23 min

  2. JUL 2

    Mapping Your Specific Cycle of Abuse

    If you’ve ever felt like you were stuck in a relationship that kept repeating the same painful patterns—no matter how much you tried to fix it—this episode is for you. In this episode, learn how the cycle of abuse plays out in emotionally abusive relationships—not as a clean four-part theory, but as a lived, messy, repetitive trap that keeps survivors hooked through false hope and temporary calm. You’ll learn: How to identify your specific version of the abuse cycleWhy tension, incident, reconciliation, and “calm” aren’t always linearHow abusers manipulate the calm phase to keep you hookedWhat it means when someone is addicted to reconciling, not repairingHow to start mapping your own cycle—so you can break itThis is not about blaming you. It’s about giving you the clarity you were never allowed to have. Support the show *New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach Email: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com {Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist {Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal {Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

    36 min

  3. JUN 25

    Can a Narcissist Actually Change?

    This is one of the most common—and most heartbreaking—questions I hear: Can a narcissist change? In this episode of You Are Not Crazy, I’m walking you through the reality behind that question. The short answer? Maybe—but almost never. Real change requires emotional accountability, humility, and deep psychological work… and most narcissists aren’t willing to do that. Not because they can’t—but because they don’t see the need. In this episode, we explore why narcissistic change is so rare, how survivors get stuck waiting for the version of their partner that never existed, and what it means to reclaim your clarity instead of waiting for someone else's transformation. I also share a personal reflection on what helped me break free from the fantasy of potential and face the truth of what was in front of me. You’ll learn: Why even accurate criticism feels unbearable to a narcissistWhat it actually takes to change—and why most won’tHow the trauma bond keeps you holding onHow to stop waiting and start healing✨ This episode pairs with my new course Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse, designed to help you make sense of the chaos and see your relationship clearly. Find it at emotionalabusecoach.com. Support the show *New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach Email: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com {Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist {Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal {Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

    14 min

  4. JUN 18

    Why It Hurts So Much (Even After Everything)

    When you're breaking a trauma bond or coming to terms with the end of a manipulative relationship, it doesn’t just bruise you—it shatters something inside. This kind of grief defies logic. You’re not just mourning a relationship. You’re grieving the version of you who believed in it, the future you imagined, and the love you gave so fully. I walk through what this heartbreak really is—and what it isn’t. It’s not weakness. It’s not over-sensitivity. It’s a nervous system crash after prolonged emotional chaos. It’s what happens when your love was real, but the relationship was built on manipulation, betrayal, or broken promises. Inside this episode: Why grief after narcissistic abuse feels unbearableThe emotional rollercoaster of detaching from someone who hurt youHow shame, self-blame, and rumination keep you stuckWhy you still miss them, even when they treated you badlyA reminder that your pain is a reflection of your depth—not a flawSupport the show *New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach Email: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com {Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist {Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal {Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

    8 min

  5. JUN 11

    Why They Couldn’t Love You: Understanding Emotional Capacity in Toxic Relationships

    What happens when the person you fought so hard to love turns out to be incapable of loving you back? What do you do with the grief, the self-doubt, and the tidal wave of confusion that follows? In this raw and deeply personal episode, I unpack what it means to love someone with traits of Cluster B personality disorders—specifically, narcissistic and borderline features—and why walking away doesn’t bring immediate peace. I share the story of how my relationship ended, the impossible ultimatum I was given, and the unraveling that came after. We explore: Why you still miss them even though they hurt youThe reality of trauma bonding and emotional addictionWhat it means to be with someone who can imitate love but not sustain itThe devastation of being blamed for everything, including their own behaviorThe disorienting grief that follows when you're mourning the illusion, not the realityWhat healing actually looks like when you finally choose yourselfThis episode is for anyone who left a relationship and still doesn’t understand why it hurts so much. For the person who can’t stop blaming themselves. For the survivor who is starting to realize: it wasn’t you. It was never you. Support the show *New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach Email: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com {Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist {Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal {Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

    18 min

  6. JUN 4

    Understanding the Trauma Bond

    We dive into the Trauma Bond: how it forms, why it's so hard to leave, and what recovery really looks like. This isn't just about red flags or textbook definitions. This is about the lived experience—the confusion, the craving for relief, the grief that shows up even when you finally leave. I walk through the invisible hooks that keep survivors attached: intermittent reinforcement, emotional manipulation disguised as love, and the powerful conditioning that teaches us to find safety in what's familiar—even when it hurts. I also share pieces of my own story, including what it felt like to be silenced, blamed, and slowly erased in a relationship that mirrored old wounds I hadn’t yet healed. You’ll hear about: The difference between love and emotional captivityHow trauma bonds are wired into your nervous systemWhy you still miss them even after they hurt youWhat gaslighting does to your sense of selfHow to begin un-gaslighting yourself and rebuild your truthSupport the show *New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach Email: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com {Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist {Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal {Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

    36 min

  7. MAY 28

    The Outburst That Isn’t About You: Emotional Storms and BPD Traits

    What do you do when the person you love explodes—and it has nothing to do with you, but you’re the one absorbing the damage? In today’s episode, I’m talking about a very specific and disorienting experience: the emotional outbursts that often come from people with traits of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). These episodes are not “just” arguments. They’re dysregulated storms—sudden, intense, and often terrifying—that leave you feeling blamed, spun, and emotionally shredded. I break down what’s actually happening in these moments, why they feel so confusing, and how to begin separating yourself from the chaos. We’ll explore: What BPD-patterned emotional storms really areWhy it feels like you’re being punished for something you didn’t doHow to recognize these moments as trauma responses, not mutual conflictWhat helped me stop spiraling when I was stuck in these cyclesThe difference between compassion and self-sacrificeWhy you’re not crazy for being overwhelmed, and why this isn’t your faultThis episode isn’t about diagnosing anyone. It’s about giving language to what survivors are living through—so you can stop blaming yourself, start validating your reality, and begin choosing peace over chaos. If this resonates, I invite you to check out my full Substack series on Cluster B abuse patterns: https://jessicaknightcoaching.substack.com/ Support the show *New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach Email: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com {Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist {Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal {Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

    12 min

  8. MAY 22

    They're Just Avoiding Accountability

    In this episode, I unpack how abusers flip the script by dredging up unrelated past events, twisting reality, and using guilt as a weapon to derail accountability. If you've ever found yourself defending a mistake from five years ago while trying to talk about how you're hurting now, this episode is for you. You’ll learn: The difference between naming a pattern and playing the blame gameHow false equivalency and DARVO keep survivors stuckWhat a healthy vs. abusive response to feedback actually sounds likeHow to stop wasting your energy defending yourself and start trusting what you knowWhether you're navigating emotional abuse, high-conflict divorce, or just trying to reclaim your clarity, this episode is a grounding reminder that your experiences are real—and you don’t need to explain your pain to someone determined to ignore it. Support the show *New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach Email: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com {Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse {E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist {Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal {Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner

    10 min
See All (199)

4.7
out of 5
53 Ratings

About

You’re exhausted from over-functioning, always managing the chaos just to make it seem okay. You feel alone. Misunderstood. Like no one sees the full story—except you. Your friends don’t get it. You question yourself constantly. You wonder if you're the problem. You're not. I understand—because I’ve been there. I know what it’s like to be stuck in an emotionally abusive relationship, gaslit into silence, and walking on eggshells every day. This podcast is here to help you feel seen. To help you make sense of the confusion. To show you that you're not crazy—and you're not alone. Whether you’re navigating narcissistic abuse, trauma bonding, or post-separation control, you’ll find clarity, validation, and language for what’s actually happening. This is your space to reclaim your truth and begin healing—on your terms. 🖤 Learn more and find resources at www.emotionalabusecoach.com

Information

  • Creator
    Jessica Knight
  • Years Active
    2022 - 2025
  • Episodes
    199
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2025 You Are Not Crazy
  • Show Website
    You Are Not Crazy

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