The Wendy M. Johnson Show Wendy M. Johnson

Episode #4 - Setting Healthy Boundaries with Dr. Dana Gionta
The Wendy M. Johnson Show
Reclaim your power, Set Boundaries. 
Our podcast features insightful discussions with experts, therapists, and survivors who bravely share their experiences and perspectives.
Hearing other’s stories, experiences and perspectives can give you courage to get the help you need. 🌺 
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Episode #5 - Family Systems with Margaret Bailey
The Wendy M. Johnson Show
Our podcast features insightful discussions with experts, therapists, and survivors who bravely share their experiences and perspectives.
Hearing other’s stories, experiences and perspectives can give you courage to get the help you need. 🌺 
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#6 Wendy's Story of Overcoming Sexual Abuse
The Wendy M. Johnson Show
Listen to Wendy’s personal story of her first memory of sexual abuse by her father and her journey to healing and eventually why she started HEAL.
Hearing other’s stories can give you courage to get the help you need. 🌺 
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#17 – Why Setting Boundaries Is So Hard - Part I
The Wendy M. Johnson Show
Why is setting boundaries so hard and what barriers stop you from speaking up? Letting go of your ‘old roles,’ separating yourself from the abuse, and finding your true authentic self is vital to learning how to set boundaries.
Have you ever found yourself in a situation where someone said something offensive to you and you did not know how to respond? And there was that awkward pause in the conversation.
Or maybe it happens to you a lot and you don’t know why. Well, get ready because this episode goes deep into what holds you back from setting boundaries and it’s not just about knowing the right words to say, it’s much deeper than that.
Let’s be honest, the thought of setting boundaries is uncomfortable for anyone, and especially for survivors. You might think it is so much easier not to say anything and continue to let others treat you horribly but actually that route takes so much more effort and diminishes your self-worth.
At the end of the day, people just want to feel they are respected in all their relationships, but why is it so hard, especially for survivors?
In this episode, which is part I of a 2-part series, I reveal what barriers stop you from setting boundaries, and dive deep into how the ‘roles’ you took on after the abuse affect you, how a victim identity can overshadow asserting your needs and why tapping into your authentic self helps you to set clear boundaries.
Today, you will hear about:
- [2:43] The boundaries we set or don’t set showcase the insecurities and strengths we feel.
- [8:32] If you blame yourself for the abuse then it is really hard to set boundaries … because you start to see yourself as the problem in arguments, disagreements, misunderstandings.
- [16:08] The Struggle with a victim identity is that as a survivor you can often internalize the role of a victim, … When you view yourself primarily through the lens of your victimization, it becomes challenging to assert your needs and limits.
- [20:38] …You will find setting boundaries to be more comfortable because you will have a healthier self-worth and that brings about self-respect and when you respect yourself, you will respect your needs and how to express them.
- [24:19] You can control how others treat you now as an adult by healing and restoring your self-worth.
Listen in, get ready to take some notes, and get ready for your next breakthrough learning about why setting boundaries is so hard!
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Download:
HEAL® Setting Boundaries Form
 

#16 – Self-Acceptance and Self-Love
The Wendy M. Johnson Show
What self-acceptance and self-love is, why they are challenging for the survivor community and often overlooked, and how you can achieve them.
What is self-acceptance and self-love? It’s accepting all aspects of who you are and understanding your worth as a person.
Abuse creates a false narrative where you might feel flawed or that something is just inherently wrong with you. And this distorted self-view is a significant barrier to self-love and self-acceptance and reaching out for help to heal.
If you feel you are inherently flawed (and this is because of the abuse), then you believe you cannot change your circumstances and are stuck forever in this cycle of a distorted belief system. The reality is the only thing that is flawed – is your belief system because it is false.
Abuse is someone taking advantage of their power over another person not because their victim is flawed, it has to do with proximity and access to you as well as arrogance, power and manipulation.
So, if you are ready to embrace who you are without judgment, accept your imperfections, and experience a balanced and healthy regard for yourself, then this episode is for you.
That’s what today’s episode is all about. So, take some ‘me’ time, put your headphones on and listen in private to a message that can help you learn how you can experience self-acceptance and self-love.
Here’s a glance at this episode…
- [3:35] Self-acceptance is recognizing and ‘accepting’ all aspects of yourself, including your strengths, weaknesses, and everything in between.
- [6:48] Self-love can give you inner peace understanding your worth is not dependent on external validation or achievements.
- [9:57] The abuse creates a false narrative where you may feel you are to blame or are just inherently flawed… The reality is the only thing that is flawed – is your belief system because it is false.
- [20:43] Changing your mindset from self-rejection and self-hatred to self-acceptance and self-love takes work and practice.
Isn’t it time you learn how to love yourself?
Listen in, get ready to take some notes, and get ready for your next breakthrough with learning about what self-acceptance and self-love are, why they are challenging for survivors, and how you can experience them!
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#15 – Parents are Protectors for our Children
The Wendy M. Johnson Show
Parents are Protectors for our Children: Parents roles, past trauma risk factors and how to protect your children
Parents are our first line of defense to protect our children, yet their past trauma can be a risk factor in the way a person parents. Knowing what you can do to protect your children is crucial in stopping the cycle of sexual abuse.
Understanding the critical role of you as a parent in preventing abuse in your children’s life is such an important privilege.
The abusive “family belief system and environment where the abuse occurred has a role in the disruption of relationships of the adult survivor. Past trauma of sexual abuse along with other types of child maltreatment, neglect, and adversities create risk factors that disrupt a mother’s ability to comfort, nurture, care for, and protect her child…The risk factor includes understanding that sexual abuse can be passed forward into the next generation, as well as the belief system that sustains it.” (1)
As parent survivors, we are the number one defense to protecting our children. Do not let your own abuse cause the cycle to continue but let it be a catalyst to stopping it.
So, what can parents do to protect their children? Get the help you need for your own healing journey, get help to protect and prevent it from happening to your children and learn to communicate clearly with your children about what abuse is and how to report about it if it happens.
That’s what today’s episode is all about. So, take some ‘me’ time, put your headphones on and listen in private to a message that can help you learn what you can do to protect your children.
Here’s a glance at this episode…
- [4:00] Parents are our children’s number one protectors against abuse
- [5:56] When you are a survivor of sexual abuse your children can become a high risk for being abused.
- [12:32] One of the risk factors stemming from childhood sexual abuse is that re-victimization to women and their children, is likely to occur when mothers continue to have a relationship or contact with the perpetrator who sexually abused them
- [20:15] As a parent you need to be a communicator. A healthy communicator.
Take your healing seriously – the next generation is counting on it.
Listen in, get ready to take some notes, and get ready for your next breakthrough with learning your role as a survivor parent, overcome sexual abuse risk factors, and learn how to protect your children!
Click here to listen!
Rate, Review, and Follow me on Apple Podcasts
Also, if you haven’t done so already, follow the podcast. I’m uploading new bonus episodes to the feed and, if you’re not following, there’s a good chance you’ll miss out. 
Follow Now!