Hey White Women

Daniella Mestyanek Young
Hey White Women

In this conversation, Daniella Mestyanek Young and Rebecca discuss their experiences with cults and the realization that white supremacy is a cult. They explore the stages of leaving a cult and the process of deconstructing white supremacy. They also discuss the concept of white privilege and the need for white people to deprogram from the myth of white supremacy. They highlight the importance of understanding and acknowledging racism and the role of white people in dismantling white supremacy. They also touch on the parallels between cult dynamics and societal systems. The conversation explores the importance of recognizing and dismantling white supremacy within oneself and society. It emphasizes the need for white women to actively engage in anti-racism work and challenge their own biases.

  1. NOV 5

    Episode 15 | Human Rights vs Pet Rocks

    This unplanned conversation delves into the complexities of anti-racism, personal growth, and the impact of societal norms on individual experiences. The speakers discuss the importance of language, the challenges of navigating discomfort, and the role of community in healing. They also explore the intersection of mental health and racism, emphasizing the need for systemic change and the journey of self-discovery. In this conversation, Haley and Rebecca delve into the complexities of identity, focusing on the intersections of race, gender, and disability. They discuss the unique experiences of black women, the societal norms surrounding gender conversations, and the impact of legislation on personal choices. The dialogue emphasizes the importance of appreciation over validation in engaging with marginalized voices, highlighting the need for safer spaces and the recognition of diverse experiences. Connect with Rebecca at: Website Patreon TikTok   Connect with Daniella at: Daniella's Patreon TikTok Instagram  Website Youtube   Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young From Bookshop.org Autographed  UnAMERICAN Videobook Takeaways Anti-racism must be made accessible to everyone. Perfectionism is a barrier to genuine anti-racist work. Deconstructing belief systems requires patience and openness. Language shapes our understanding of race and identity. Discomfort is a necessary part of growth and learning. Community support is vital in the healing process. Mental health issues are often exacerbated by societal pressures. Self-discovery is a continuous journey, not a destination. Rest and relaxation are essential for personal well-being. Understanding personal trauma can inform our interactions with others. our trauma is rooted in the tenets of race. Race is gendered and gender is racialized. We need safer places for black women to express themselves. Legislation impacts personal choices significantly. Survivor's guilt can complicate feelings of freedom. Engagement with black voices should focus on appreciation, not validation. The complexity of black womanhood is often overlooked. Gender conversations are still evolving in society. Understanding intersectionality is crucial for empathy. Education does not equate to understanding lived experiences. Sound Bites "The gaslighting is insane." "We [black women] are the most educated." "Don't relate, appreciate." Produced by Haley Phillips

    1h 31m
  2. OCT 29

    Episode 14 | Discomfort Isn’t Danger: Rehumanizing Conflict

    In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore the complexities of human nature, the oversimplification of good and evil narratives, and the importance of rehumanization in social discourse. They discuss the role of white women in social justice, the impact of capitalism on group dynamics, and the necessity of discomfort for personal growth. The conversation emphasizes the power of personal narratives, critical thinking, and storytelling in fostering empathy and understanding, while also addressing the limitations of white feminism and the need for preventative measures in societal issues. Connect with Rebecca at:  Website Patreon TikTok   Connect with Daniella at: Daniella's Patreon TikTok Instagram  Website Youtube   Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young From Bookshop.org Autographed  UnAMERICAN Videobook Sound Bites "Nothing's ever obviously evil." "We need to find the human." "It's not helpful to call everything a cult." Takeaways The narrative of good and evil is often oversimplified. Rehumanization is essential in understanding complex issues. Cults often thrive on dehumanization and manipulation. Discomfort is a necessary part of growth and change. White women have a unique role in advocating for social change. The illusion of safety can prevent necessary actions. Capitalism influences group dynamics and perpetuates harmful systems. Personal narratives are powerful tools for understanding and change. Humor can be an effective way to address serious topics. Not all groups can be classified as 'good' under capitalism. White feminism can sometimes overshadow the voices of women of color. Critical thinking is essential in understanding social issues. Preventative measures are often undervalued in society. Historical context is crucial for understanding current issues. Storytelling can bridge gaps in understanding and empathy. Self-discovery is a lifelong journey that involves acknowledging past mistakes. Change is a natural part of personal growth and understanding. Human nature is complex and cannot be easily categorized. Empathy and understanding are vital for social progress. Chapters 00:00 The Complexity of Good and Evil 03:38 Rehumanization and the Danger of Labels 06:43 Understanding Cult Dynamics and Societal Norms 09:46 The Role of Discomfort in Social Change 12:33 Navigating Power Dynamics and Privilege 15:50 The Importance of Trusting Intuition 18:30 The Fragility of Comfort and Its Consequences 21:40 The Role of White Women in Social Justice 24:50 The Ripple Effect of Advocacy 27:53 The Need for Authentic Voices in Conversations 30:37 The Impact of White Fragility on Dialogue 39:02 Understanding White Supremacy and Its Tenets 43:14 The Role of Prevention in Society 45:40 The Value of Video and Synchronous Conversations 50:27 Personal Growth and Changing Perspectives 52:32 The Importance of Acknowledging Personal History 57:38 Dehumanization in Systems of Power 01:00:53 The Complexity of Good and Evil in Society 01:05:33 The Importance of Passionate Discourse 01:07:51 The Complexity of Human Nature and Group Dynamics 01:11:43 Creating Safe Spaces for Discussion Produced by: Haley Phillips

    1h 14m
  3. OCT 22

    Episode 13 | There Are No Easy Answers

    In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore the intersections of entertainment, identity, and societal structures. They discuss the role of whiteness in shaping experiences, the burdens of perfectionism and productivity, and the implications of the cult of entrepreneurship. The conversation delves into the dynamics of social media, the weaponization of secrets, and the importance of community versus group dynamics. They also reflect on the impact of capitalism on human value, the complexities of international relations, and the need for transparency in systems. Ultimately, they emphasize the importance of individuality and the role of women in society, while advocating for a more nuanced understanding of these issues. Connect with Rebecca at:  Website Patreon TikTok   Connect with Daniella at: Daniella's Patreon TikTok Instagram  Website Youtube   Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young From Bookshop.org Autographed  UnAMERICAN Videobook Takeaways Entertainment is a crucial aspect of teaching and content creation. Navigating identity in relation to whiteness can be complex and challenging. Perfectionism and productivity are often burdensome in corporate culture. The cult of entrepreneurship can perpetuate harmful dynamics and expectations. Social media can amplify cult-like behaviors and influence. Secrets can be weaponized to maintain power and control. Community is distinct from groups; it involves individuality and shared experiences. Capitalism often dehumanizes individuals, treating them as resources. Rethinking freedom requires examining societal structures and their implications. Historical figures and their legacies impact contemporary discussions on identity and power. Sound Bites "You are the entertainment." "Know your place aggression." "Rest is productive." Chapters 00:00 The Role of Entertainment in Content Creation 02:26 Navigating Identity and Race 04:50 The Boredom of Whiteness 07:19 The Burden of Productivity 11:58 The Cult of Entrepreneurship 19:28 Influencers and Cult Dynamics 24:28 The Complexity of Credibility 30:15 Understanding Cult Dynamics 36:52 The Tyranny of Definitions 42:21 The Art of Human Connection 48:17 The Cult of Employment 52:06 The Dehumanizing Nature of Systems 54:44 The Impact of Sleep Deprivation on Life 57:50 The Electronic Leash of Work Culture 01:00:53 The Weaponization of Secrets in Governance 01:05:05 Patriarchy and the Culture of Violence 01:09:45 Community vs. Group Dynamics 01:15:02 The Need for Human-Centric Systems

    1h 19m
  4. OCT 15

    Episode 12 | Education and Total Institutions (Surprise producer appearance)

    In this suprise guest episode, the speakers explore the challenges of traditional education, particularly for neurodivergent individuals. They discuss the concept of total institutions and how societal norms can impact personal identity and acceptance. The dialogue shifts to the importance of navigating life beyond conventional paths, embracing change, and redefining expertise. The speakers also touch on the dangers of cult-like structures and apocalyptic thinking in society, emphasizing the need for personal narrative and the evolution of tools in human adaptation. In this conversation, the speakers explore the challenges and opportunities of self-publishing versus traditional publishing, the impact of social media on self-worth, and the complexities of safety and uncertainty in today's world. They discuss the societal expectations surrounding work, the illusion of choice in education, and the importance of community and shared experiences. The conversation also delves into the implications of the worship of the written word, the intersection of race and narrative, and the need to deconstruct societal norms and expectations. Connect with Rebecca at:  Website Patreon TikTok   Connect with Daniella at: Daniella's Patreon TikTok Instagram  Website Youtube   Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young From Bookshop.org Autographed  UnAMERICAN Videobook Takeaways Haley is dropping out of school to pursue her interests. Total institutions can create harmful group norms. Neurodivergent individuals often struggle in structured systems. Acceptance in groups can be superficial and manipulative. Life paths are rarely linear; zigzagging is common. Self-definition is crucial in navigating personal identity. Cults can exploit feelings of rejection and need for belonging. Apocalyptic thinking is prevalent in American culture. New tools can provoke fear but also lead to adaptation. Personal narratives are powerful in shaping identity. Self-publishing offers innovative ways to reach audiences. Social media can create a transactional view of self-worth. Uncertainty does not equate to unsafety. Life expectancy for neurodivergent individuals is alarmingly low. The traditional work ethic is being challenged by younger generations. Education often limits true choice in career paths. Community support is vital for personal growth and understanding. The written word is often revered without questioning its origins. Racial narratives are often shaped by historical biases. Societal norms can be deconstructed for a more inclusive future. Sound Bites "Group norms in total institutions really matter." "The master's tool will not tear down the master's house." Chapters 00:00 Breaking Free from Traditional Education 04:12 Understanding Total Institutions 06:53 The Struggles of Neurodivergence in Structured Systems 09:55 The Complexity of Identity and Acceptance 12:56 Navigating Life Beyond Conventional Paths 15:55 The Challenge of Self-Definition 19:04 The Dangers of Cult-like Structures 22:03 Apocalyptic Thinking in Society 24:53 The Evolution of Tools and Human Adaptation 28:11 The Power of Personal Narrative 31:03 Embracing Change and Uncertainty 33:58 Redefining Expertise and Identity 41:44 Navigating Traditional Publishing vs. Self-Publishing 44:40 The Impact of Social Media on Self-Worth 47:43 Understanding Safety and Uncertainty 50:51 Challenging the Work Culture Paradigm 53:46 The Illusion of Choice in Career Paths 56:35 Redefining Value Beyond Traditional Metrics 59:45 The Role of Education and Societal Expectations 01:02:06 The Power of Community and Shared Experiences 01:05:12 Navigating Conversations on Race and Whiteness 01:08:40 Deconstructing the Worship of the Written Word 01:11:26 The Intersection of Sexuality and Identity 01:21:50 Closing Thoughts on Empowerment and Change

    1h 23m
  5. OCT 8

    Episode 11 | The Popular Girls Aren't Happy

    This conversation explores the complexities of ageism, objectivity, and bias, particularly in relation to race and gender. The speakers discuss the societal perceptions of age, the historical context of bias, and the reinterpretation of myths through feminist lenses. They delve into the impact of gender in combat and leadership roles, the illusion of popularity and happiness, and the flaws of objectivity in society. The discussion also touches on cognitive dissonance, indoctrination, and the intersection of whiteness and objectivity, emphasizing the dangers of extremism and the importance of nuanced conversations in challenging societal norms. Connect with Rebecca at:  Website Patreon TikTok   Connect with Daniella at: Daniella's Patreon TikTok Instagram  Website Youtube   Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young From Bookshop.org Autographed  UnAMERICAN Videobook Takeaways Ageism is perceived differently across communities. Objectivity is often a facade used to assert dominance. Historical narratives are often biased and subjective. Feminist retellings of myths challenge patriarchal perspectives. Gender diversity in leadership enhances effectiveness. The pursuit of popularity does not guarantee happiness. Cognitive dissonance complicates personal beliefs and actions. Indoctrination can occur in various forms, including societal norms. Whiteness often dictates the perception of objectivity. Extremism thrives on the need for certainty and belonging. Sound Bites "Ageism in the black community just doesn't fly." "Objectivity doesn't exist, but it's weaponized." Chapters 00:00 Challenging Perspectives on Ageism and Objectivity 04:08 The Role of Bias in Historical Contexts 07:04 Reinterpreting Myths Through Feminist Lenses 09:59 The Impact of Gender in Combat and Leadership 13:02 The Illusion of Popularity and Happiness 16:04 The Flaws in Measuring Success and Happiness 18:56 Recognizing Red Flags in Relationships and Cults 21:54 The Complexity of Indoctrination and Self-Identity 25:01 The Dangers of Extremism and Objectivity 27:47 The Role of Whiteness in Conflict and Identity 31:04 Navigating Relationships Across Racial Lines 33:50 The Burden of Representation and Identity 36:58 The Importance of Conflict in Personal Growth 39:56 The Role of Emotions in Decision Making 43:06 The Nuances of Anti-Racism and Personal Responsibility 45:58 The Intersection of Trauma and Identity 48:59 The Complexity of Objectivity and Subjectivity 51:55 The Role of Humor and Stereotypes in Society 54:52 The Value of Suffering and Hard Work 57:54 The Need for Change in Leadership Dynamics 01:00:58 The Search for Identity Beyond White Supremacy Produced by Haley Phillips

    1h 13m
  6. SEP 24

    Episode 10 | Sunk Cost Fallacy

    In this conversation, Rebecca and Daniella explore the complexities of content creation, the importance of flexibility, and the challenges of navigating societal expectations. They discuss the value of redefining success, the impact of branding on perception, and the role of secrecy in both corporate and cult environments. The conversation also delves into the sunk cost fallacy, the dangers of objectivity in data interpretation, and the intersection of gender and power dynamics, ultimately highlighting how cults can appeal to individuals during times of social turmoil. In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore the complexities of identity, societal structures, and personal growth. They discuss the unsettling nature of disability, the validation that comes from education, and the cognitive dissonance experienced in toxic environments. The dialogue emphasizes the importance of recognizing sunk cost fallacies in life choices and the potential for systemic change through collective action. They also touch on redefining success and the joy of personal transformation, all while advocating for mutual support and understanding in the face of societal challenges. Connect with Rebecca at:  Website Patreon TikTok   Connect with Daniella at: Daniella's Patreon TikTok Instagram  Website Youtube   Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young From Bookshop.org Autographed  UnAMERICAN Videobook Takeaways Navigating the content creator space is challenging due to societal expectations Flexibility in work schedules is a highly valued luxury. Success can be redefined beyond traditional metrics. Branding can significantly influence public perception and engagement. Secrecy in organizations can both empower and control individuals. Understanding the sunk cost fallacy can help in making better decisions. Objectivity in data can be manipulated to serve specific narratives. Gender dynamics play a crucial role in power structures. Cults often emerge during periods of social instability, offering false promises of safety. Empowerment comes from recognizing and challenging oppressive systems. Disabled people make us face our own vulnerabilities. Education can serve as a form of validation and identity. Degrees are just fancy receipts of validation. Cognitive dissonance can lead to personal growth. Leaving toxic systems is often the best choice. It only takes a small percentage of people to create systemic change. Redefining success is crucial for personal fulfillment. The joy in suffering is a false narrative. We can all advocate for each other in meaningful ways. Talking about our experiences is a powerful tool for change. Sound Bites "It cost me more than just money to do this." "There is nothing more luxurious than a flexible schedule." "You can do something with your brain." "Disabled people make us face our own vulnerabilities." "It's a lie that if you play the game right, everything is perfect." "Degrees are just fancy receipts of validation." Chapters 00:00 Navigating Content Creation Challenges 03:24 The Value of Flexibility and Freedom 06:32 Defying Norms in Creative Spaces 09:37 Rebranding and Identity in the Digital Age 12:25 The Role of Secrecy in Cultures and Corporations 15:21 The Sunk Cost Fallacy and Personal Growth 18:29 Challenging Patriarchal Structures 21:33 The Illusion of Objectivity in Business 24:29 Women in Leadership and Corporate Scams 27:29 Consumerism and Financial Control 30:31 Creating New Narratives in Publishing 35:53 Challenging Historical Norms 38:50 The Impact of Discrimination 41:42 Cults and Social Structures 47:55 Navigating Identity and Experience 51:56 Sunk Cost Fallacy in Life Choices 58:05 Cognitive Dissonance and Cult Dynamics 01:03:47 Redefining Success and Happiness 01:07:49 The Cost of Staying in Toxic Systems 01:12:01 The Power of Collective Change 01:17:20 The Importance of Open Conversations

    1h 24m
  7. SEP 17

    Episode 9 | Language of White Supremacy

    In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore the intersections of cult dynamics, whiteness, and gender, discussing how personal experiences shape broader societal issues. They delve into the importance of language, the exit costs of leaving cults, and the power of storytelling. The discussion emphasizes the need for community support, the role of silence in conversations, and the challenges of navigating identity and intersectionality. They also reflect on the impact of personal narratives on societal change and the importance of inclusivity and representation in various spaces. Books: Caste by Isabel Wilkerson Connect with Rebecca at:  Website Patreon TikTok   Connect with Daniella at: Daniella's Patreon TikTok Instagram  Website Youtube   Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young From Bookshop.org Autographed  UnAMERICAN Videobook Takeaways Cults often use language to control and manipulate individuals. Personal hobbies can intersect with political discussions. Gender dynamics affect everyday interactions and experiences. Leaving a cult involves significant emotional and social costs. Storytelling is a powerful tool for understanding and healing. Silence can be both a protective and a harmful force in conversations. Objectivity in data can be misleading; personal narratives matter. Community support is crucial for personal empowerment. Inclusivity requires active participation and acknowledgment of diverse voices. Reimagining life beyond traditional structures can lead to personal freedom. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Background 03:39 Challenges Faced by Women 06:44 The Language of White Supremacy 12:45 The High Costs of Leaving Cults 26:18 Silencing and Performative Regulation 37:44 The Power of Community and Inclusivity 41:34 Challenges and Risks of Speaking Out 47:41 White Women's Role in Amplifying Marginalized Voices 52:06 Learning from Mistakes and Acknowledging Growth 57:23 The Power of Language and Storytelling 01:03:13 Challenging Societal Norms and Expectations 01:07:27 Prioritizing Self-Care and Personal Growth 01:12:02 Empowering Individuals to Create Change 01:14:56 Recognizing the Limitations of Objectivity 01:17:22 Finding Your Own Path and Creating Your Own Rules Produced by Haley Phillips

    1h 18m
  8. SEP 10

    Episode 8 | White Supremacy in the Cult of Corporate America

    The conversation explores the themes of color, PowerPoint culture, repetitiveness of work, cult-like aspects of organizations, the need for individuality, the impact of white supremacy, and the power of democratized knowledge. In this conversation, Rebecca and Daniella discuss the loaded language around the word 'racist' and the fragility and volatility that white people often exhibit when confronted with accusations of racism. They emphasize the importance of deconstructing belief systems and actively working to dismantle white supremacy. They also explore the concept of traumalages, the blending of personal traumas and privileges that shape individual perspectives and abilities. The conversation touches on the need to acknowledge and address the impacts of systems of power, the role of language in maintaining control, and the necessity of storytelling and sharing human experiences to effect change. Connect with Rebecca at:  Website Patreon TikTok   Connect with Daniella at: Daniella's Patreon TikTok Instagram  Website Youtube   Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young From Bookshop.org Autographed  UnAMERICAN Videobook Takeaways Color can be a contentious issue in different contexts, such as the military and personal preferences. PowerPoint culture in organizations can be excessive and repetitive, leading to a cult-like environment. The repetitiveness of work and the pressure to conform can be draining and hinder individuality. White supremacy and its influence on systems and organizations can limit diversity and perpetuate harmful practices. The democratization of knowledge through platforms like TikTok challenges traditional power structures and allows for diverse voices to be heard. The word 'racist' carries a heavy and loaded connotation, particularly for white people, who often exhibit fragility and volatility when confronted with accusations of racism. Deconstructing belief systems and actively working to dismantle white supremacy is a necessary and ongoing process. Traumalages, the blending of personal traumas and privileges, shape individual perspectives and abilities, and acknowledging and addressing the impacts of systems of power is crucial. Language plays a significant role in maintaining control, and storytelling and sharing human experiences are powerful tools for effecting change. Sound Bites "Don't you dare put pink on a slide." "How American to hand over all of our communication to this." "The corporate hatred of individuality" "There's this heaviness only with white people, because it's interesting. I thought about like black people rarely will call someone racist, like in everyday life." "White people always hear you are racist and then they flip a switch. I call it like more instead of fragility, I see it more as volatility." "I very organically have a much more diverse following. And I was like, looking at that, and I was like, hey, look at that. Like, that means I've done some good work in the past two years." Chapters 00:00 Color and Conformity 02:06 PowerPoint Culture and Cult-Like Aspects 03:33 The Impact of Work and Motivation 04:43 The Democratization of Knowledge and Power Structures 08:52 Standardized Interviews and Expertise 11:44 Whiteness and White Supremacy in Organizations 41:43 Deconstructing Belief Systems 42:38 Confronting Toxic Systems and Acknowledging Privilege 53:45 The Power of Storytelling and Language 01:05:55 Inclusion and Exclusion: The Role of Language 01:10:20 Accepting and Considering Different Perspectives

    1h 17m
4.9
out of 5
15 Ratings

About

In this conversation, Daniella Mestyanek Young and Rebecca discuss their experiences with cults and the realization that white supremacy is a cult. They explore the stages of leaving a cult and the process of deconstructing white supremacy. They also discuss the concept of white privilege and the need for white people to deprogram from the myth of white supremacy. They highlight the importance of understanding and acknowledging racism and the role of white people in dismantling white supremacy. They also touch on the parallels between cult dynamics and societal systems. The conversation explores the importance of recognizing and dismantling white supremacy within oneself and society. It emphasizes the need for white women to actively engage in anti-racism work and challenge their own biases.

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