Singleness, Sex, and Dating Podcast

Perry Noble
  • 4.6 (85)
  • CHRISTIANITY
Singleness, Sex, and Dating Podcast

While he enjoys talking about Jesus, the local church, and leadership, one of Perry Noble's favorite topics is relationships. In his upcoming dating book, scheduled to release in Fall 2016, Perry will answer the most popular dating questions people ask. By listening to this podcast, you will hear Perry's advice on how to navigate singleness, the truth about sex and what successful, healthy dating should look like.

  1. 06/26/2016

    8 Reasons Why You Can’t Get A Date or Get Married

    Episode Summary One of the biggest frustrations among singles is NOT being able to get a date, here are EIGHT reasons to consider why you may not be dating… 1. It’s not time!!!  2. You want to get married more than you want to walk with Jesus! 3.  You are bitter! 4. You struggle with impurity! 5. You are trying too hard!!! 6. You are finding your identity in who you date (or if you can get a date) more than you are in a relationship with Jesus! 7. You are willing to compromise in order to go out with someone! If you are a follower of Jesus Christ then compromise can never be a consideration!!! 8. Especially if you are a dude…you are not responsible financially!!! Episode Resources Episode Quotes One of the worst things you could do as a single person is spend so much time evaluating other people and not actually evaluating yourself. — Perry Noble A person can be so in love with the idea of getting married so much so that their walk with Jesus will suffer. — Perry Noble Run hard after Jesus and look to your right and to your left and if the person you want to pursue or that is pursuing you is beside you in that run, then they’re probably the one — Perry Noble You’ve got to ask God for brokenness rather than bitterness so that the bitterness in your life can be healed. — Perry Noble Getting married, we’re supposed to be better together, not bitter together. — Perry Noble Self control is a gift given to us by the Holy Spirit — Perry Noble You can be sexually involved with someone and not be intimate with them. — Perry Noble Sex without intimacy leads to destruction every single time. — Perry Noble There's a difference between pursuing and stalking. — Perry Noble Girls, if you have to consistently throw yourself at a man, that's not the man you need to be with. — Perry Noble The person that you find your identity in- anyone other than Jesus- they’re ultimately going to let you down. Not because they’re mean. It's just because they're human. — Perry Noble If you're a follower of Christ them compromise can never be a consideration. — Perry Noble There’s no such thing as missionary dating. — Perry Noble If you feel like you have to compromise before the relationship, after the relationship begins there will be nothing but compromise. — Perry Noble If you want to find a wife, the best thing you can do today is do whatever it takes to get our of debt. — Perry Noble All Content is © 2005 - 2025 All Rights Reserved

  2. 05/31/2016

    Are You Dating The Right One? 10 Things To Consider

    Episode Summary Perry teaches through these 10 things to consider to see if you are dating the right one: 1. They are not willing to fight for purity. 2. If they are trying to get me to compromise what God’s word says so clearly. 3. If you are always defending him/her to the people who know you, love you and love Jesus. 4. If you find yourself not wanting to talk about him/her in front of the people in your life that you KNOW may disapprove of the relationship for some reason. 5. If you know the relationships isn’t really going anywhere but you don’t want to break up because doing so would cause you to be insecure because you have allowed yourself to be identified by who you are dating rather than who you are in Christ. 6. You find out they are lying to you. 7. If you cannot confront them about issues without them losing their temper. 8. If you discover they are unfaithful to you. 9. If something about them drives you insane but you convince yourself that after you get married, that problem will go away. 10. If the Lord has specifically spoken to you and instructed you to end the relationship because you can’t or you won’t because you don’t want to hurt them or fear that if you end the relationship then you won’t have a chance at another one. Episode Resources Episode Quotes If people aren’t willing to fight for purity before they’re married, there’s a greater chance they won’t fight for it after they’re married. — Perry Noble Purity is a fight. — Perry Noble It is totally possible to love Jesus and at the same time have to fight for purity. — Perry Noble You can fight better in community than you can alone. — Perry Noble Compromise can never be a consideration if you want a setup for a healthy marriage. — Perry Noble No one has EVER been fixed by compromise. — Perry Noble If the relationship isn't going anywhere, a conversation is needed. — Perry Noble If they lie to you when you're dating, it's a pattern in their life, and they will lie to you when you're married. — Perry Noble A guy that loses his temper all the time is not someone you'll be able to trust with your heart or with your children. — Perry Noble A woman that cannot control her emotions is not submitted to the Holy Spirit of God. — Perry Noble If you find out that they're cheating on you, you do not need to date them. You're better than that. — Perry Noble Marriage is a magnifier. — Perry Noble It wasn’t that she was a bad girl or I was a bad guy. We just were not BEST for each other. — Perry Noble Obedience is never easy, but it’s always right. — Perry Noble All Content is © 2005 - 2025 All Rights Reserved

  3. 02/28/2016

    Perry Answers YOUR Questions About Singleness, Sex and Dating - Part 12

    Episode Summary In this podcast Perry answers REAL questions that you've submitted to perrynoble.com/ask about singleness, sex and dating! In this month's episode, Perry answers the following questions: 1. RC from SC asks: Do you think it's wrong to work for and/or go to places like Hooters? 2. Kira from NC asks: What are the real roles in a relationship for each partner? Do the man and the woman have different roles? 3. Bryn from the United Kingdom writes: Pastor P, after listening to your podcast I decided I wanted to stand up emotionally, and sat down with the girl I've had feelings for to let her know how I felt. We are good friends and while she didn't give me feedback on how she felt I get the sense she feels the same way but finds the idea of relationships intimidating. How do I pursue her in a Godly way that makes her feel cared for without being pressured, while trying to grow emotionally myself? 4. Tori in SC asks: I have been struggling with singleness especially with it being "engagement season." How do you cope with the loneliness? And how do you know if you are being called to singleness? 5. Grace in Washington writes: As a kid growing up in church, I feel like I was taught that the best way to honor God was to avoid dating relationships altogether. Now as a college student, I am beginning a relationship with a godly man, and even though I like him, I sometimes struggle to let him pursue me because for so long I have believed that godliness and romance are opposed to one another (unless you're married.) What practical advice would you have for me as I try to pursue a TRUE biblical view of romance within the context of this new relationship? 6. Christian in SD asks: How do I know which girl to pursue? There are two really awesome godly girls at my church. Girl #1 I have liked for about 5 years - I have asked her out a couple of times, but she has shot me down both times. Girl #2 seems a little flirty with me, but I don't think I could be all in to a relationship with her due to my feelings for girl #1. Do I just not take no for an answer from girl #1 or do I pursue girl #2 and hope my other feelings diminish? 7. Tyler from SC asks: Is it wrong to masterbate if you are married and you think about your wife/husband when you do it? As long as it doesn't interfere with your intimate time together? 8. BONUS FOR TIME Unknown in Ohio: My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a year. During our relationship we have messed up sexually. We've talked about not doing it again but it just keeps happening again and again. I'm tired of feeling guilty… What should I do? The thought of breaking up with him gets me excited because I won't have to feel guilty about sexually sinning but it also worries me because what if I never get to date again? Should I just keep trying to work things out? Episode Resources Perry is writing a book on being single, relationships and dating scheduled to release later in 2016 and he would LOVE to know what questions you have as a single person, or wish you would've asked before you got married. Just send in your question at perrynoble.com/ask and he may answer it in his book! Episode Quotes The guy is the leader, the girl is the challenge. — Perry Noble If the dude is passive, you need to pass on him. — Perry Noble The roles may reverse for a season, but if it’s not a season, then the relationship gets really sick. — Perry Noble If God has put the desire in your heart to get married one day, you’re not called to singleness. — Perry Noble You know you're called to be single when you don’t deal with that loneliness anymore. — Perry Noble The backup girl is never God’s best for you. — Perry Noble Until girl #2 becomes girl #1 you can’t commit to her. — Perry Noble You need to stay with w…

  4. 02/14/2016

    Perry Answers Your Questions About Singleness, Sex and Dating - Part 11

    Episode Summary In this podcast Perry answers REAL questions that you've submitted to perrynoble.com/ask about singleness, sex and dating! In this month's episode, Perry answers the following questions: 1) Ken in Virginia: I met this girl who I felt that I have great chemistry with but is not a Christian. Is continuing a relationship with her as friends in hope that she becomes a Christian okay? It almost feels selfish. 2) Michael from California writes: I have been dating a great girl for a while now. I have always heard the saying "You just know" when talking about the time to pop the question. Is this true, how will I really know when I am ready or the time is right? 3) Becca from North Carolina asks: What do you do if you are dating someone and you're not sure you should be dating? I'm just not sure how physically attracted I am to him. Does the physical really matter? Will my attraction for his character and love for Jesus transfer over to the physical? 4) Stacey from California asks: What is the difference between being led in a relationship and being controlled? My parents always brought me up to be independent and my partner's parents brought him up to lead which is causing some friction. A close family friend was abused in her marriage, I am always on the lookout for warning signs but I don't know if I'm just being overly sensitive. 5) Denise from SC writes: I can't get over having an abortion when I was 21 and it bothers me to the point I can't have a relationship with anyone. 6) Elizabeth from South Carolina writes: I was in a 3 yr. relationship with my ex and we had a baby. Things didn't work out between us and I sometimes feel betrayed by him for not trying hard enough. Now I feel like I have trust/commitment issues that won't let me move on. How can I help myself let go of anger or resentment and not have it affect healthy relationships in my life? 7) Kate from KS writes: Why does it feel as though God is holding out or being passive when it comes to my heart and desires? I have encouraged and cheered on friend after friend, wedding after wedding and now baby after baby, around me. It’s like God didn't plan someone for me... I know He does things in his own time but I'm discouraged because of what feels like God's passivity... RAPID FIRE QUESTIONS: Q: There’s a guy, he thinks you’re attractive what should he do? Q: What if you are the girl and you get asked and you aren’t feeling it? Q: You have the first date with the guy, you’re uncertain about how you feel about them, should you go on another? Q: What if it’s a second date, and he tries to hold your hand and you aren’t feeling it Q: How soon is too soon when bringing up the DTR? Episode Resources Perry is writing a book on being single, relationships and dating scheduled to release later in 2016 and he would LOVE to know what questions you have as a single person, or wish you would've asked before you got married. Just send in your question at perrynoble.com/ask and he may answer it in his book! Episode Quotes God wants the absolute best for you. Period. — Perry Noble Guys- you can def be her friend, BUT you can’t be her friend with your own agenda. — Perry Noble A girl doesn't want to feel like a project — Perry Noble The only way to know that you're with the one, is you actually marry them. — Perry Noble Once you've married them they become "the one". — Perry Noble If they’re not fun, they’re not the one. — Perry Noble Being the leader doesn't mean you always get your way — Perry Noble Being the leader means you often go last — Perry Noble If someone has to declare they are the leader, they aren't the leader — Perry Noble Guys- if you're trying to lead from posision "I'm the man", you're not the leader — Perry Noble Men lead and women challeng…

  5. 12/28/2015

    Perry Answers YOUR Questions About Singleness, Sex and Dating - Part 10

    Episode Summary In this podcast Perry answers REAL questions that you've submitted to perrynoble.com/ask about singleness, sex and dating! In this month's episode, Perry answers the following questions: 1) "I frequently get asked'"when are you gonna start dating?' and even at times get made fun of by some family members for being single. I'm in a point in my life where I know God has called me to serve my church community and be single but at times find myself really upset and frustrated cause of the hassle that being single has brought me. How do I deal with my family when they ask me 'when are you going to start dating someone?'" - Stephen from California 2) "How do you know when it is the right time, to ask the woman that you like to take the relationship to the next level?" - Dorsey from New York 3) "What do you think about large age differences in dating/marriage? I seem to get along best with women much younger than I am. Thanks" - Robert from South Carolina  4) "Recently I was pursued by a great godly guy. After a few months of dating he said that he just wasn't ready to commit, maybe we were better as friends, and he just didn't have that emotional spark with me that he has had in previous relationships. I believe that 'spark' is sometimes lust or shallow infatuation...do you agree? Do you feel butterflies are necessary?" - Anonymous 5) "If you're dating someone who truly loves The Lord and you end up committing sexual sin and then you both repent because of it, should you stay with this person or consider calling it quits?" - Jordan from South Carolina 6) "Is it ok to date a man who is separated from their spouse (for over a year) and in the divorce process? A process that due to attorney complications, may take a long time to finalize...?" - Carol from South Carolina 7) "Any time I pursue a girl I get anxiety that it won’t end well because I have been on the wrong end of a break up and have an anxiety disorder. I have trouble avoiding thinking the worst and I put relationships on pedestals. I’m less stressed and a better person when I’m not pursuing a relationship. How do you trust God when pursuing a women even when anxiety kicks in?" - Michael from Illinois Episode Resources Perry is writing a book on being single, relationships and dating scheduled to release later in 2016 and he would LOVE to know what questions you have as a single person, or wish you would've asked before you got married. Just send in your question at perrynoble.com/ask and he may answer it in his book! Episode Quotes Don't let your emotions run your decisions. — Perry Noble Sometimes it takes a woman longer to feel a connection. — Perry Noble It’s not age, it’s maturity. — Perry Noble If pursuit is the goal then age doesn’t matter. — Perry Noble Older guys know they can manipulate younger woman. — Perry Noble You're not always going to have the butterflies, but there needs to be a general excitement when the person walks in the room. — Perry Noble Just because you made a mistake doesn’t mean you are called to be miserable the rest of your life. — Perry Noble If you mess up sexually, it doesn’t mean you need to be end it. It just means you need to set up boundaries and have things in place to adhere to those boundaries. — Perry Noble Don’t say “we’ve messed up” or “we crossed some lines” or “we went too far”. Fully confess it. — Perry Noble There’s a difference between repentance and temporary relief. — Perry Noble When we truly move from seeking temporary relief to repentance, God can heal that relationship. — Perry Noble In the dating stage - if it’s not fun, they aren’t the one. — Perry Noble Find out where your security lies. — Perry Noble If you have to force a relationship, it’s not worth it. Let it happen on it's own. — Pe…

  6. 11/29/2015

    Perry Answers YOUR Questions About Singleness, Sex and Dating - Part 9

    Episode Summary In this podcast Perry answers REAL questions that you've submitted to perrynoble.com/ask about singleness, sex and dating! In this month's episode, Perry answers the following questions: "I haven’t found anywhere in the Bible where we are promised a spouse. For years I’ve been told that God has someone just for me and that’s hope I have clung to. But now I realized that God may have a purpose for my singleness. He may not have someone for me. Could that be the case?" - Dana "What about men and women that are called to be single?" Gianna "As a guy and leader striving to keep Christ at the center, what are some good practices or ways ensure that we as a couple and I as the leader am keeping Christ at the center?" - Ryan "I don’t feel like I’m spiritually ready for any dating relationship, but at church, with friends, family or anywhere else I feel like it’s looked down upon and I’m a second class citizen because I’m single. Should I just date someone and figure out any growth and spiritual maturity along the way?" - Parker "What about praying together… I’ve read conflicting things. Is this ok? Or is it opening yourself up to a level of vulnerability that should occur later down the road?" - Stephanie "What about single parents dating? When should I introduce my 5 year old son and how? Part of me wants to protect him by not introducing him and seeing where the relationship goes. But the other part of me doesn’t want to fall for a guy before seeing his interaction with my kid." - Stephanie "I’m a single 23 year old pastor. Whenever I go on a first date I try not to put anymore pressure on it besides getting to know each other. In the last three years every date I’ve been on I leave the date thinking she was nice but I don’t feel a connection. I maintain a friendly relationship… (never go on a date again) but say hi at church. I usually find out the girl is upset with me. I never truly understand why, I didn’t lead her on or try not to. I often feel like giving up dating and women. What is your advice to a young single pastor on dating?" - Rob "I am unmarried and have already had sex with the man I am with now, he is the only guy that I have had sex with. If we plan to get married why should we stop now?" - Katherine Episode Resources Perry is writing a book on being single, relationships and dating scheduled to release later in 2016 and he would LOVE to know what questions you have as a single person, or wish you would've asked before you got married. Just send in your question at perrynoble.com/ask and he may answer it in his book! Episode Quotes There is nothing in scripture that promises a spouse, but it does say God made man and woman to help each other. You can’t do life alone. — Perry Noble If you are called to be single than you probably know it. But if you have a desire in your heart to be married then you have to hold on to that. — Perry Noble Jesus did not have a romantic relationship and he had an abundant life — Perry Noble If you depend on romance in a relationship, one day that relationship will no longer be romantic so you will go to affair to affair to affair or bed to bed to bed. — Perry Noble Men’s facts need our feelings. — Mere Knox To stay pure and keep Christ at the center, always keep both feet on the floor. — Perry Noble Purity does not come naturally, it must be fought for. — Perry Noble Marriage is a gift, so when I begin to think I’m entitled to it, it’s no longer a gift. — Mere Knox If two people are praying together, it’s real hard to sin together. — Perry Noble The motivation of prayer should be to get closer to Jesus, not to manipulate the other person. — Perry Noble God has already given you the discernment you need, now you need to step into what you know. — Perry No…

  7. 10/25/2015

    Perry Answers YOUR Questions About Singleness, Sex and Dating - Part 8

    Episode Summary In this podcast Perry answers REAL questions that you've submitted to perrynoble.com/ask about singleness, sex and dating! In this month's episode, Perry answers the following questions: "How do you respond to someone who has a commitment phobia?" - Elissa "Hey Pastor P! As a 21 year old single female in the South, 90% of my friends are married, engaged, or in serious relationships. I just got out of a long term relationship myself. Sometimes I become bored with singleness and end up in situations I know I shouldn't be in...what advice can you give me to stay focused on God when I'm weak or bored? How can I stay positive when I'm the only single one out of all my friends?" - Shannon "Can starting a relationship in a long distance situation work? And what steps can I take to make our relationship stronger when we are apart? For example, we worked together in the summers but the rest of the year visits are a few weeks apart." - Stephen "I'm 35 years old and work in full-time ministry at my church. I love my job, have great friendships and family relationships, and have my life in order. But, I don't know any single men in their 30's, I never get asked out on dates (literally!), and I've always wanted to be a wife and mom. Even though every other area of my life is awesome, should I move to a bigger city to meet more available single Christian men?" - Lindsay "What are some practical tips for single men who want to stop masturbating? The fight against lust is one thing, but what about the fight against our own body and physical urges when those feelings won't go away?" - Jeremy "I've been married before. I know my mistake was not choosing a partner that would be a spiritual leader for me. But now I can't seem to find men who have that potential. Is that something you help someone build during dating or something that should already be there when you begin dating?" - Mandy "I, like many people, have had trouble finding someone to fall in love with. I have had many dates and my problem seems to be that when I get to know them I'm picky. It can be about something so minor that it just draws a red flag in my mind. Do you have any tips for me to try to help me not be so picky?" - Stephen "Pastor P, How do I ask God to take away feelings for someone who I know I shouldn't have feelings for? I have prayed for over a year for God to take this person off of my heart but he hasn't. It's almost starting to consume me to the point where I'm afraid I won't be able to get excited about my future spouse because I'm so focused on one guy? Please help!" - Christina Episode Resources Perry is writing a book on being single, relationships and dating scheduled to release later in 2016 and he would LOVE to know what questions you have as a single person, or wish you would've asked before you got married. Just send in your question at perrynoble.com/ask and he may answer it in his book! Episode Quotes If you are involved with someone that has commitment issues, you need to ask them “why?” — Perry Noble If you’ve given your heart to Jesus and He leads someone into your life, are you trying to protect yourself from something that Jesus is trying to bring that is good to you simply because you are afraid? — Perry Noble Don’t get so bored with singleness that you run out and get in a complicated relationship. — Perry Noble Desperation in dating, always leads to destruction. — Perry Noble Singleness is not a sickness, it’s a season. — Perry Noble Long distance relationships can work, especially when it’s not built on the physical. — Perry Noble You have to understand the intimidation factor when it comes to single Christian guys. — Perry Noble Masturbation is not just a fight against our own body, it’s a fight against lust. — Perr…

  8. 09/27/2015

    Perry Answers YOUR Questions About Singleness, Sex and Dating - Part 7

    Episode Summary In this podcast Perry answers REAL questions that you've submitted to perrynoble.com/ask about singleness, sex and dating! In this month's episode, Perry answered the following questions: "When is the appropriate age to start accepting Godly pursuits from guys?" - Karis "Why were Old Testament heroes such as Solomon, David, Abraham and Jacob allowed to have more than one wife?" - Kyle "How important is "chemistry" in dating and looking for a future spouse? For example- if you like and respect a guy a whole lot but just don't have that "spark."" - Alex "Hey Pastor P! I'm very much attracted to and have a lot of admiration for a girl that I do youth ministry with. We are close friends. Every time people are around us, they wonder why we aren't dating. I confronted her once, but she is only interested in friendship #friendzone. I'm an interesting guy and I believe I would make a great husband, but most Christian girls tend to want the "bad boys". My question is, why do Christian guys always seem to finish last?" - Joshua "In a relationship, how can you tell when to keep fighting and when to just let it go and break up?" - Carly "I am learning to put down my ideals of what a godly man looks like. For example: maybe he isn't the up front Christian leader, maybe he also is the silent man who communicates his love for God by doing actions. So I want to ask you: What are the different ways that men show they love God? How can I know when a man's first priority is God (even if it isn't something he would be quick to talk about.)?" - Karla "What about those of us who struggle with homosexuality, but don't want to be single the rest of our lives? How do we cope?" - Christina "I'm a 28 year old female in love with Jesus. I'm a leader at my church and am passionate about growing Gods kingdom. The problem I have is finding my male equal. That guy- passionately in love with Jesus, capable of being my spiritual "head"- seems nonexistent around here. I've never found it attractive for a man to have a previous marriage and/or kids. I feel those are things I want to experience for the first time with my husband. All my life people have told me I'm picky but I just feel I'm searching for Gods best for me. After all, I don't have that baggage. I have a job, a house, I'm an independent woman. I want the same things in my partner. What do you think? Should I ask God to open my heart and mind to something I've never thought I wanted- to be less picky? Or am I right in being so selective?" - Kayla "Is there EVER grounds for divorce aside from abuse and infidelity?" Kim Episode Resources Perry is writing a book on being single, relationships and dating scheduled to release later in 2016 and he would LOVE to know what questions you have as a single person, or wish you would've asked before you got married. Just send in your question at perrynoble.com/ask and he may answer it in his book! Episode Quotes Marriage is not about the sparks, marriage is about continually making the effort to love each other every day. — Perry Noble Girls - don’t pick a guy you need to fix. You are not the Holy Spirit, you can’t fix him. And sometimes God won’t fix him because there’s a compromising girl in the way. — Perry Noble Guys - If she says she just wants to be friends, just be a good friend. — Perry Noble Fighting is natural in a relationship. The problem is believing that marriage will make the fighting stop. — Perry Noble If you’re always fighting, figure out why you’re fighting, and if the majority of your relationship is fighting, you should throw in the towel. — Perry Noble Marriage is a magnifier of who you really are. — Perry Noble If the majority of your relationship is fighting, then it’s not worth it. — Perry Noble Girls - Let the criteri…

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About

While he enjoys talking about Jesus, the local church, and leadership, one of Perry Noble's favorite topics is relationships. In his upcoming dating book, scheduled to release in Fall 2016, Perry will answer the most popular dating questions people ask. By listening to this podcast, you will hear Perry's advice on how to navigate singleness, the truth about sex and what successful, healthy dating should look like.

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