TILT Parenting: Raising Differently Wired Kids Debbie Reber

Author and former NY Times Motherlode editor KJ Dell'Antonia talks about her book "How To Be a Happier Parent" and what she learned about how parents can bring more happiness into their daily lives.
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Parent coach Zach Morris joins Debbie to answer a listener question about how to help a twice-exceptional 8 year old (ADHD and Autism), be more flexible and less argumentative in a way that supports the whole family's emotional regulation.
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For some people, going to the doctor isn’t as simple as going to the doctor. In fact, for many parents of neurodivergent kids, and for many neurodivergent people themselves, interacting with healthcare systems requires researching, planning, and strategizing ahead of time in the hopes of a smooth appointment. Unfortunately, all too often, medical appointments are uncomfortable, stressful, and in some cases traumatic, because they environments and approaches to healthcare aren’t neurodivergent affirming.
As a result, traditional healthcare models often fail their neurodivergent patients, which is why today’s conversation is so important, as my guest is a doctor who is passionate about changing medical practices to be more neuroinclusive and community-based on this episode. Dr. Mel Houser is a family physician and Founder and Executive Director of All Brains Belong VT, a nonprofit organization in Montpelier, Vermont with a mission to support the health and belonging of people with all types of brains. All Brains Belong has pioneered an innovative model that integrates medical care with social connection, employment support, and community education.
In this conversation, Mel introduced me to the All Brains Belong Vermont, a revolutionary community-driven healthcare model that goes beyond medical care. We also talked about why the traditional healthcare system often fails neurodivergent patients and the serious consequences when they opt out of the medical system, the critical need for healthcare to address not just physical, but also social and emotional needs, and practical strategies on advocating for better healthcare, from understanding access needs and requesting accommodations to challenging the defaults of the current system.
 
About Dr. Mel Houser
Dr. Mel Houser is a family physician and Founder and Executive Director of All Brains Belong VT, a nonprofit organization in Montpelier, Vermont with a mission to support the health and belonging of people with all types of brains. All Brains Belong has pioneered an innovative model that integrates medical care with social connection, employment support, and community education.
 
Things you'll learn

How all Brains Belong Vermont has developed a community-driven healthcare model that integrates medical care with social connection and employment support

Why the traditional healthcare system often fails neurodivergent patients

What the consequences are when neurodivergent people opt out of the medical system

Why it’s critical that healthcare address patients' social and emotional needs

What universal design for healthcare is and how it can improve experiences for neurodivergent people

How we can all advocate for better healthcare by learning about access needs, requesting accommodations, and challenging system defaults

 
Resources mentioned


All Brains Belong (Dr. Mel Houser’s website)

All Brains Belong on Instagram

All Brains Belong on Facebook

Dr. Mel Houser on LinkedIn


All Brains Belong Resource, ALL THE THINGS (Free resource for navigating neurodivergent healthcare)


All Brains Belong Kid Connections (Free customized friend-making program for kids age 4-17 based on shared interests)

Everything is Connected to Everything: Improving the Healthcare of Autistic & ADHD Patients


Brain Club: (Weekly virtual community education program for older teens & adults)


Practical Strategies for Neuroinclusive Healthcare (webinar)

Milton’s ‘double Empathy Problem’: A Summary for Non-academics

 
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Marisa Meddin, founder of Talk College To Me and the creator of The 7 Day College Admissions Crash Course For Parents, discusses how students can become the strongest possible college applicants they can be.
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As my guest said in the episode you’re about to listen to, you don’t have to be a mental health professional to have mental health conversations. In fact, I would say that talking about difficult mental health topics outside of medical settings is not just helpful — it’s necessary in that it both normalizes mental health challenges and reduces the stigma that’s often associated with such struggles.
Author and Illustrator Cara Bean also knows this to be true, and is committed to exploring these topics through her art, specifically comics. Cara sees comics as a powerful tool both for teens to learn about mental health, and for parents to lean on for important conversations about complex topics. Which is exactly why she wrote her new book, Here I Am, I Am Me: An Illustrated Guide to Mental Health.
Every chapter in this therapist-recommended book explores a different aspect of mental health, from the brain and the mind, to feelings and emotions. By portraying complex neuroscience concepts with a cast of illustrated characters, Cara offers an accessible, approachable understanding of what’s going on in the brain that empowers readers.
I really love Cara’s book and so wanted to have her on the show to talk about her process for writing it, and how we can use it to support kids going through hard stuff. So in this conversation, Cara explained the way she visualized thoughts and feelings, why she felt so strongly about including detailed brain science in her book, and the power of metaphors to explain the impacts and struggles of addiction, depression, anxiety, and suicidality, making these heavy topics more relatable and easier to understand.
 
About Cara Bean
Cara Bean is the author of Here I Am, I Am Me: An Illustrated Guide to Mental Health and Draw 500 Funny Faces and Features. She provides interactive workshops on creativity with people of all ages and backgrounds in various public forums. Cara is passionate about drawing and believes that the simple act of doodling on paper can lead to the investigation of complex ideas.
When she is not teaching, she makes comics that delve into poetic self introspection, playful storytelling and topics relevant to teens and teaching. Cara is currently working on comics projects that speak directly to kids and address mental health. Cara lives in Massachusetts with her husband and their dog Raisin.
 
Things you'll learn

How comics can provide an honest and accessible way to discuss complex issues

The benefits of visualizing thoughts and feelings through thought bubbles and metaphors for enhancing understanding

Why Cara felt so strongly about including detailed brain science in the book in order to foster understanding of emotional health and reactions

How Cara leaned into the power of metaphors to explain the impact and struggles of things like addiction, depression, anxiety, and suicidality

Why Cara wrote her book Here I Am, I Am Me for, and how different readers might approach engaging with it

 
Resources mentioned

Cara Bean’s website


Here I Am, I Am Me: An Illustrated Guide to Mental Health by Cara Bean


Draw 500 Funny Faces and Features by Cara Bean

Snakepit graphic pamphlet for adults

John Porcellino (King-Kat Comics)


The Breakthrough Years: A New Scientific Framework for Raising Thriving Teens by Ellen Galinsky


Ellen Galinsky Takes Us Through The Breakthrough Years and Raising Thriving Teens (Tilt Parenting Podcast)

Graphic Medicine


Bill Waterson (Calvin & Hobbes)


The Addiction Inoculation: Raising Healthy Kids in a Culture of Dependence by Jessica Lahey


Jess Lahey on Her New Book The Addiction Inoculation (Tilt Parenting Podcast)

 
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Julie Skolnick, the founder of With Understanding Comes Calm, shares tools and strategies for how parents can powerfully advocate for our kids and understand them as learners so we can show up as the best parent we can be.
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