178 episodes

Editors’ Notes: “I want to give everybody the tools to solve their own etiquette problems,” says Nick Leighton, cohost and producer of Were You Raised by Wolves?, a weekly podcast in which he and cohost Leah Bonnema look into the many sticky social situations we all face. “With each of the questions that we get, from the bonkers to the ordinary, I always try to take a step back and ask, ‘What are the bigger principles here?’ I'm always looking for topics that help us make a larger point.” In each episode, Leighton, a two-time Emmy Award-winning journalist, and Bonnema, a comic/writer, share practical advice on how to navigate a wide range of situations, from the serious to the whimsical—whether they tackle interrupting excessive talkers, establishing healthy boundaries with coworkers, or the proper way to eat Cheetos.

When they developed the show in 2019, Leighton and Bonnema had one goal in mind: to have empathy for other people. Their informal conversations tackle a mix of personal topics, viewer questions, and the occasional historical fact with warmth and positivity and humor. Leighton views this approach as an antidote to a lot of the negativity he sees in the online world, while Bonnema thinks the show’s premise is a natural fit for her situational style of comedy. “A lot of my comedy is about events where I’m like, ‘What just happened here?’ or where I embarrass myself,” she says. “And, ironically, all of these fall under the guise of etiquette, where you either feel aggrieved or you feel like you committed some sort of social crime. I just loved the topic.”

Leighton and Bonnema credit the show’s ongoing success to their work ethic. They haven’t missed a single week since they launched the show, which recently hit a new milestone: 100 episodes. But what they value the most, above all else, is how they've built a community of listeners from all backgrounds. “We have conservative grandmothers in Tallahassee to nonbinary chefs in Seattle and everybody in between,” he says. “Because who among us has not experienced an etiquette crime? This is universal.”

---

Etiquette, manners, and beyond! Join Emmy® Award-winning journalist Nick Leighton and acclaimed comedian Leah Bonnema ("Late Show with Stephen Colbert"), the perfect odd couple, as they try to make the world a nicer, more polite place and offer up practical advice to help you smoothly glide through any situation. Please listen and follow! (We'd send you a hand-written thank you note if we could.)

Were You Raised By Wolves‪?‬ Were You Raised By Wolves

    • Society & Culture
    • 4.7 • 1.4K Ratings

Listen on Apple Podcasts
Requires subscription and macOS 11.4 or higher

Editors’ Notes: “I want to give everybody the tools to solve their own etiquette problems,” says Nick Leighton, cohost and producer of Were You Raised by Wolves?, a weekly podcast in which he and cohost Leah Bonnema look into the many sticky social situations we all face. “With each of the questions that we get, from the bonkers to the ordinary, I always try to take a step back and ask, ‘What are the bigger principles here?’ I'm always looking for topics that help us make a larger point.” In each episode, Leighton, a two-time Emmy Award-winning journalist, and Bonnema, a comic/writer, share practical advice on how to navigate a wide range of situations, from the serious to the whimsical—whether they tackle interrupting excessive talkers, establishing healthy boundaries with coworkers, or the proper way to eat Cheetos.

When they developed the show in 2019, Leighton and Bonnema had one goal in mind: to have empathy for other people. Their informal conversations tackle a mix of personal topics, viewer questions, and the occasional historical fact with warmth and positivity and humor. Leighton views this approach as an antidote to a lot of the negativity he sees in the online world, while Bonnema thinks the show’s premise is a natural fit for her situational style of comedy. “A lot of my comedy is about events where I’m like, ‘What just happened here?’ or where I embarrass myself,” she says. “And, ironically, all of these fall under the guise of etiquette, where you either feel aggrieved or you feel like you committed some sort of social crime. I just loved the topic.”

Leighton and Bonnema credit the show’s ongoing success to their work ethic. They haven’t missed a single week since they launched the show, which recently hit a new milestone: 100 episodes. But what they value the most, above all else, is how they've built a community of listeners from all backgrounds. “We have conservative grandmothers in Tallahassee to nonbinary chefs in Seattle and everybody in between,” he says. “Because who among us has not experienced an etiquette crime? This is universal.”

---

Etiquette, manners, and beyond! Join Emmy® Award-winning journalist Nick Leighton and acclaimed comedian Leah Bonnema ("Late Show with Stephen Colbert"), the perfect odd couple, as they try to make the world a nicer, more polite place and offer up practical advice to help you smoothly glide through any situation. Please listen and follow! (We'd send you a hand-written thank you note if we could.)

Listen on Apple Podcasts
Requires subscription and macOS 11.4 or higher

    Returning Dirty Handkerchiefs, Reading Office Emails Aloud, Getting Permission from References, and More

    Returning Dirty Handkerchiefs, Reading Office Emails Aloud, Getting Permission from References, and More

    Etiquette, manners, and beyond! In this episode, Nick and Leah answer listener questions about returning dirty handkerchiefs, reading office emails aloud, getting permission from professional references, and much more. Please follow us! (We'd send you a hand-written thank you note if we could.)
    Have a question for us? Call or text (267) CALL-RBW or visit ask.wyrbw.com

    QUESTIONS FROM THE WILDERNESS:

    What's proper handkerchief etiquette?

    What should I do about a coworker who reads all his emails out loud?

    Should I thank my neighbor for doing unwanted yard work on my property without my permission?

    Should you ask references for permission before listing them on a job application?

    Vent: People who don't RSVP to parties


    THINGS MENTIONED DURING THE SHOW
    "Love Is Blind" trailer on YouTube

    YOU ARE CORDIALLY INVITED TO...

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    CREDITS
    Hosts: Nick Leighton & Leah Bonnema
    Producer & Editor: Nick Leighton
    Theme Music: Rob Paravonian

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    TRANSCRIPT
    Episode 171
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    • 26 min
    Eating Rambutans, Using QR Code Menus, Paying For Free Theatre, and More

    Eating Rambutans, Using QR Code Menus, Paying For Free Theatre, and More

    Etiquette, manners, and beyond! In this episode, Nick and Leah tackle eating rambutans, using QR Code menus in restaurants, paying for free theatre tickets, and much more. Please follow us! (We'd send you a hand-written thank you note if we could.)
    Have a question for us? Call or text (267) CALL-RBW or visit ask.wyrbw.com

    EPISODE CONTENTS


    AMUSE-BOUCHE: Rambutans


    A QUESTION OF ETIQUETTE: QR code menus in restaurants


    QUESTIONS FROM THE WILDERNESS: What should I do about a friend who promised to take me to the theatre but then had me pay? What should I do about employees in big box stores that don't wash their hands in the restroom?


    VENT OR REPENT: Nosy people in Laurel Canyon, Reality TV spoilers


    CORDIALS OF KINDNESS: Thanks for the book, A nice review


    THINGS MENTIONED DURING THE SHOW

    QR codes on Wikipedia

    Per Se restaurant in New York

    "Levitated Mass" documentary trailer


    YOU ARE CORDIALLY INVITED TO...

    Support our show through Patreon

    Subscribe and rate us 5 stars on Apple Podcasts

    Call, text, or email us your questions


    Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter


    Visit our official website

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    Buy some fabulous official merchandise


    CREDITS
    Hosts: Nick Leighton & Leah Bonnema
    Producer & Editor: Nick Leighton
    Theme Music: Rob Paravonian

    ADVERTISE ON OUR SHOW
    Click here for details

    TRANSCRIPT
    Episode 170
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    • 39 min
    Sharing French Fries Fairly, Doing Dishes Incorrectly, Inviting Enemies to Parties, and More

    Sharing French Fries Fairly, Doing Dishes Incorrectly, Inviting Enemies to Parties, and More

    Etiquette, manners, and beyond! In this episode, Nick and Leah answer listener questions about sharing french fries fairly, doing dishes incorrectly, inviting enemies to parties, and much more. Please follow us! (We'd send you a hand-written thank you note if we could.)
    Have a question for us? Call or text (267) CALL-RBW or visit ask.wyrbw.com

    QUESTIONS FROM THE WILDERNESS:

    If one person asks another for a bite of food, who gets to pick the bite?

    What do I do about my father-in-law who does not wash dishes properly?

    Is it OK to send someone a second note using the same stationery as the first?

    Should I invite two friends who don't like each other to my party?

    Aftermath: What happened after that South American trip?


    THINGS MENTIONED DURING THE SHOW
    Sissy Spacek breaking a dish

    YOU ARE CORDIALLY INVITED TO...

    Support our show through Patreon

    Subscribe and rate us 5 stars on Apple Podcasts

    Call, text, or email us your questions


    Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter


    Visit our official website

    Sign up for our newsletter

    Buy some fabulous official merchandise


    CREDITS
    Hosts: Nick Leighton & Leah Bonnema
    Producer & Editor: Nick Leighton
    Theme Music: Rob Paravonian

    ADVERTISE ON OUR SHOW
    Click here for details

    TRANSCRIPT
    Episode 169
    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 21 min
    Eating Off Trenchers, Butting Into Conversations, Serving Instant Coffee, and More

    Eating Off Trenchers, Butting Into Conversations, Serving Instant Coffee, and More

    Etiquette, manners, and beyond! In this episode, Nick and Leah tackle eating off of trenchers, butting into conversations, serving instant coffee to guests, and much more. Please follow us! (We'd send you a hand-written thank you note if we could.)
    Have a question for us? Call or text (267) CALL-RBW or visit ask.wyrbw.com

    EPISODE CONTENTS


    AMUSE-BOUCHE: Trenchers


    A QUESTION OF ETIQUETTE: Butting into conversations


    QUESTIONS FROM THE WILDERNESS: I'm not a coffee drinker, but should I offer coffee to my houseguests? Should I eat the British way when in the UK?


    VENT OR REPENT: Cutting in line, Using doors


    CORDIALS OF KINDNESS: Thanks for the dog sitting, Thanks for taking our survey


    THINGS MENTIONED DURING THE SHOW

    Tiger's Nest in Bhutan

    Margaret Visser's "Rituals of Dinner"

    Tournedos Rossini

    Single-serve Coffee


    YOU ARE CORDIALLY INVITED TO...

    Support our show through Patreon

    Subscribe and rate us 5 stars on Apple Podcasts

    Call, text, or email us your questions


    Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter


    Visit our official website

    Sign up for our newsletter

    Buy some fabulous official merchandise


    CREDITS
    Hosts: Nick Leighton & Leah Bonnema
    Producer & Editor: Nick Leighton
    Theme Music: Rob Paravonian

    ADVERTISE ON OUR SHOW
    Click here for details

    TRANSCRIPT
    Episode 168
    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 42 min
    Holiday Break: Giving Red Envelopes, Reseating in Theaters, Cancelling on Friends, and More

    Holiday Break: Giving Red Envelopes, Reseating in Theaters, Cancelling on Friends, and More

    Etiquette, manners, and beyond! This week, Nick and Leah are enjoying a well-deserved break, but they'll be back next week with an all-new episode. In the meantime, here's one of their favorite episodes from the archives in which they tackle giving red envelopes in China, reseating people in metaphorical theaters, cancelling on friends, and much more. Please follow us! (We'd send you a hand-written thank you note if we could.)
    Have a question for us? Call or text (267) CALL-RBW or visit ask.wyrbw.com

    EPISODE CONTENTS


    AMUSE-BOUCHE: Red Envelopes - (Hóngbāo - 紅包)


    A QUESTION OF ETIQUETTE: The theatre metaphor


    QUESTIONS FROM THE WILDERNESS: Was it rude for friends to cancel on us and then go and host a party of their own on the same night? What do I do about people who keep giving me clothing donations for a charity I no longer volunteer for?


    VENT OR REPENT: An uncomfortable car ride, A dinner nobody wanted


    CORDIALS OF KINDNESS: Thanks to the parents, A happy baby


    THINGS MENTIONED DURING THE SHOW
    One possible red envelope origin story

    YOU ARE CORDIALLY INVITED TO...

    Support our show through Patreon

    Subscribe and rate us 5 stars on Apple Podcasts

    Call, text, or email us your questions


    Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter


    Visit our official website

    Sign up for our newsletter

    Buy some fabulous official merchandise


    CREDITS
    Hosts: Nick Leighton & Leah Bonnema
    Producer & Editor: Nick Leighton
    Theme Music: Rob Paravonian

    TRANSCRIPT
    Episode 124
    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 42 min
    Holiday Break: Tipping at the Holidays, Ordering Too Much at Drive-Thrus, Begging for Gifts, and More

    Holiday Break: Tipping at the Holidays, Ordering Too Much at Drive-Thrus, Begging for Gifts, and More

    Etiquette, manners, and beyond! This week, Nick and Leah are enjoying a well-deserved break, but they'll be back soon with an all-new episode. In the meantime, here's one of their favorite episodes from the archives in which they tackle tipping at the holidays, ordering too much at drive-thru windows, begging people to buy you presents, and much more. Please follow us! (We'd send you a hand-written thank you note if we could.)
    Have a question for us? Call or text (267) CALL-RBW or visit ask.wyrbw.com

    EPISODE CONTENTS


    AMUSE-BOUCHE: Circumambulation at a Buddhist temple


    A QUESTION OF ETIQUETTE: Christmas Tipping


    QUESTIONS FROM THE WILDERNESS: How to respond to unsolicited requests for presents? Should my children have done more to acknowledge our big wedding anniversary? Is there such thing as "too large" an order for a drive-thru?


    VENT OR REPENT: Intentionally splashed, Interrupting numbers


    CORDIALS OF KINDNESS: Birthday presents, Best wishes from China


    THINGS MENTIONED DURING THE SHOW

    Circumambulating Mt. Tam

    Loaf of bread emoji


    YOU ARE CORDIALLY INVITED TO...

    Support our show through Patreon

    Subscribe and rate us 5 stars on Apple Podcasts

    Call, text, or email us your questions


    Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter


    Visit our official website

    Sign up for our newsletter

    Buy some fabulous official merchandise


    CREDITS
    Hosts: Nick Leighton & Leah Bonnema
    Producer & Editor: Nick Leighton
    Theme Music: Rob Paravonian

    TRANSCRIPT
    Episode 64
    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 42 min

Customer Reviews

4.7 out of 5
1.4K Ratings

1.4K Ratings

sahmnana ,

Grandma approved

I listen to a LOT of podcasts but this quickly became my favorite 😍 I love the humor and friendship between the hosts accompanied by great advice. I grew up in a very formal household so I think I’m pretty well versed in all the etiquette things, but I’m still learning just like everyone else. I just listened to the handkerchief ( newest) episode. As a girl I learned a gentleman would carry his own( often monogrammed) and then a fresh one just in case he ran into a lady who might be shedding a few tears. The spare one was hers to keep. In this day and age if anyone runs into one of these gentlemen you should consider dating him, he’s a class act. Keep up the wonderful work, hugs from nana 🥰

celtmaid2 ,

Fun, informative, helpful

As a woman of a certain age who carries personal calling cards and stationery - just in case - I love hearing the stories of how the next generation is navigating today’s social norms. The episode about French fries was hilarious.

Weight Lifter Dani ,

Much more than lessons on etiquette

The world needs more etiquette, laughter, and sweetness, and these two deliver on all those things.

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