8 min
Episode 408: Intrinsic And Extrinsic Worth Chronic Wellness
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- Health & Fitness
I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard
I recently read Emily Henry's, "The People We Meet on Vacation." She did a great job putting to language the ways we are confident and insecure, and how relationships expose us to new layers of ourselves. In the book one of her characters said that the more someone got to know her, the more she was afraid they'd discover the ugly and unlovable in her.
I highlighted that passage and returned to it because I think that any of us who carry any shame or worthiness wounds -- that's what's at the heart of it. That when all the trappings are stripped away, we'll come up short and be rejected. That anxiety is often to difficult to bear and so we: hustle, people-please, distance, get addicted, hurt others first, and many more habits of self-defense.
What's also interesting about this is that it's a commentary on the other person, too. It suggests that I'm so skilled at maintaining a façade that you can't see through, but if you did you wouldn't like what you'd see... So it also suggests that the other person (whose opinion we seem to care a lot about) is dupable or dim.
Perhaps in a life without many obstacles, it might be easy to never have to examine these questions. However, chronic pain and illness stops you short and requires facing these kinds of questions.
This weekend I was talking with a friend of a friend who had a life-altering surgery. They're questioning things like "What is my worth?" "What is my value if I'm not in the world of work?" "Will my partner stay if I'm significantly transformed?" These aren't simple questions.
In a world where productivity is tied to output, it's difficult to not see that as a commentary on our worth. While it's so simple for me to see that YOU have intrinsic worth, your value is your existence, your value is your YOUNESS. But, it's much more difficult for me (on a hard day) to say it about myself -- but that is the goal.
Do you struggle with these questions?
This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness.
Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.
I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard
I recently read Emily Henry's, "The People We Meet on Vacation." She did a great job putting to language the ways we are confident and insecure, and how relationships expose us to new layers of ourselves. In the book one of her characters said that the more someone got to know her, the more she was afraid they'd discover the ugly and unlovable in her.
I highlighted that passage and returned to it because I think that any of us who carry any shame or worthiness wounds -- that's what's at the heart of it. That when all the trappings are stripped away, we'll come up short and be rejected. That anxiety is often to difficult to bear and so we: hustle, people-please, distance, get addicted, hurt others first, and many more habits of self-defense.
What's also interesting about this is that it's a commentary on the other person, too. It suggests that I'm so skilled at maintaining a façade that you can't see through, but if you did you wouldn't like what you'd see... So it also suggests that the other person (whose opinion we seem to care a lot about) is dupable or dim.
Perhaps in a life without many obstacles, it might be easy to never have to examine these questions. However, chronic pain and illness stops you short and requires facing these kinds of questions.
This weekend I was talking with a friend of a friend who had a life-altering surgery. They're questioning things like "What is my worth?" "What is my value if I'm not in the world of work?" "Will my partner stay if I'm significantly transformed?" These aren't simple questions.
In a world where productivity is tied to output, it's difficult to not see that as a commentary on our worth. While it's so simple for me to see that YOU have intrinsic worth, your value is your existence, your value is your YOUNESS. But, it's much more difficult for me (on a hard day) to say it about myself -- but that is the goal.
Do you struggle with these questions?
This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness.
Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.
8 min