That Hoarder: Overcome Compulsive Hoarding That Hoarder

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Podcast show notes, links and transcript: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ 
I have a bit of an emotional moment in this one! In this episode, I talk about how we can spot those things that may have been useful at one point but are limiting us now. And look at how we can start to even entertain the idea of moving away from them without getting overwhelmed by the things that we're running away from in the first place.
Identifying coping mechanisms that have become detrimental
How once-helpful behaviours or thoughts can now cause stress, annoyance, or interfere with work and relationships
Acknowledging the negative impact of these coping mechanisms
Letting Go of Detrimental Coping Mechanisms
Symbolism of finding freedom after letting go of detrimental habits
Thanking coping mechanisms for past usefulness while acknowledging their current negative impact
The process of letting go described as taking small steps
Emphasising gradual change rather than extreme transformation
My experience of letting go of self-harm as a coping mechanism
Therapist's advice to apply the same principle to hoarding
Reflecting on past coping mechanisms and their evolution
Reassessing the need for detailed to-do lists as a coping mechanism for insecurity and fear
Overcoming Adversity and Achieving Small Victories
The power of achieving small victories
Using every bit of progress to fuel the next step, even if it feels impossible
Identifying the benefits derived from hoarding and finding alternative positive coping mechanisms
Adopting Positive Behaviours and Embracing Change
Importance of trial and error and gradual change in adopting positive behaviours
Encouraging curiosity and open-mindedness
Acknowledging that change doesn't have to happen all at once
Our lives can be better without the distress-causing coping mechanisms
Support and Community
Invitation to hoarders for an event for support and discussion
Acknowledging past coping mechanisms, embracing self-acceptance.
Struggling with past coping mechanisms; learning to let go.
Identify harmful coping mechanisms to improve well-being.
Understanding underlying emotional needs.
Reflect on coping mechanisms, assess their effectiveness.
Identify and let go of problematic coping mechanisms, consider letting go of hoarding behaviours.
Reflect on positive moments, gently acknowledge the problems.
Find positive coping mechanisms, assess their effectiveness, and make gradual changes.

Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom Session: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ticket
Subscribe to the podcast: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/subscribe
Podcast show notes, links and transcript: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ 
We need to talk about hoarding and physical disabilities, chronic illness, and chronic pain. With the inimitable Dr. Jan Eppingstall, I look at the unique challenges faced by individuals with disabilities, chronic health conditions who hoard. From the impact of aging on hoarding tendencies to the struggles of navigating a hoarded space while managing chronic pain, we offer insights and practical strategies for those dealing with hoarding and physical limitations. Join us as we delve into the complexities of hoarding and its intersection with physical health challenges in a compassionate and informative discussion.
The Impact of Disabilities on Hoarding Behaviours
Complex relationship between hoarding and disabilities
Chronic pain, mental health issues, and aging
The prevalence and severity of hoarding in correlation with aging and physical limitations
The challenges of categorising people and their impairments
Gender Disparities and Disabilities in Hoarding research
The association between physical disabilities, chronic illness, and chronic pain with hoarding, particularly among women
The link between autoimmune diseases, common in women, and hoarding
The impact of poverty on disabilities and hoarding
Advocacy challenges for women with disabilities and hoarding behaviours
The need for women to better acknowledge their achievements without feeling like boasting
The significance of functional impairment in the discussion
The importance of persistently seeking medical help despite the gender pain gap and lack of specificity in symptoms
Strategies for individuals to lead a more independent and fulfilling life despite chronic issues
The effects of giving up on seeking medical help on documenting conditions and receiving appropriate care
Managing Hoarding and Disabilities
Balancing function over appearance for hoarders with chronic health problems
The individuals' strong attachment to certain aesthetics and struggles in decluttering due to sentimental attachment
Practical ways to seek help and simplify tasks for people with hoarding tendencies, particularly for those living alone
Strategies for managing household tasks despite limited mobility
The importance of pacing oneself and not pushing beyond physical limits
The impact of spending time outdoors on mental and physical health
Challenges of Aging and Hoarding
Accumulation of belongings over a lifetime, particularly among older generations
Reluctance to part with items due to sentimental attachment and difficulty decluttering with physical limitations
The isolation and loneliness experienced by older individuals in decluttering and organising tasks
Addressing the challenges faced by hoarders with physical limitations, including lifting, fine motor skills, and brain fog
The impact of limited energy and the need for careful prioritisation of tasks
Living with Physical Health Problems in a Hoarded Environment
The physical and emotional challenges of living with physical health problems
Managing disabilities and planning, scheduling appointments, and attending to physical needs in a hoarded space
The increased energy consumption living in a hoarded space
Navigating chronic pain and strategies to manage dehoarding tasks even on bad pain days
Differentiating between tasks that move the needle and those that simply paper over the cracks
Hoarding research shows self-selection bias towards females.
Hoarding increases with age, affecting functionality.
Disability requires more planning and preparation.
Living with physical limitations is never straightforward.
Self-compassion improved my situation.
Avoid pushing too hard, limit activities to 3 hours.
Hoarding and function over appearance for health.
Assessing and

Today, I look at the impact of micro trends on our lives and how they are contributing to clutter and excessive consumption and the additional challenges hoarders face in this ever-evolving landscape of trends. I look at identifying our true style beyond societal pressures and resisting the temptation of constantly changing trendy items. Join me to explore the consequences of indulging in micro trends, the environmental impact of fast fashion, and strategies to make mindful purchasing decisions in a world dominated by fleeting trends.

Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom Session: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ticket
Subscribe to the podcast: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/subscribe
Podcast show notes, links and transcript: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/podcast-ep-140-how-to-cope-with-or-help-a-partner-who-hoards-with-laura-silverstein-certified-gottman-couples-therapist/ 
This week, I’m with Laura Silverstein, a Certified Gottman Couples Therapist, who is a genius on how couples can improve their communication and the way they take each other’s needs into account. So we explore the complexities of living with a hoarding partner and the impact it has on relationships.
Laura provides anecdotes and advice on setting healthy boundaries, initiating difficult conversations, and the role of a therapist in couples therapy. We also discuss the value of authentic communication, empathy, and the idea that love requires continuous effort.
We look at the difficulties non-hoarding partners face in understanding their hoarding significant other, the impact of unresolved conflicts, and the evolving perception of quirks in a relationship. The conversation highlights the importance of open and honest communication, emphasising the need for both partners to be involved in decluttering decisions.
Join us as we talk about coping with – and helping – a hoarding partner in a relationship.
Living with a Hoarding Partner
Challenges for the non-hoarding partner
Understanding hoarding behaviour
Impact of conflict in relationships
Approaching hoarding issues as a couple
Communication and Decision Making
Importance of open and honest communication
Involving the hoarding partner in decluttering decisions
Examples of different approaches to decluttering
Setting Boundaries and Deal Breakers
Clear communication and healthy boundary setting
Communicating core needs with a partner
A therapist's role in helping couples set boundaries
Couples Therapy and Relationship Dynamics
Role of a Therapist in Couples Therapy
Encouraging honest and respectful communication
The goal of therapy in relationships
Valuing the time spent in a relationship
Initiating and Navigating Difficult Conversations
Approaching conversations in a positive and constructive way
The "I like, I wish, I wonder" framework for expressing emotions and requests
The importance of clear communication and avoiding misunderstandings
Building and Sustaining Relationships
Acknowledging each partner's needs
Significance of authenticity, empathy, and mutual understanding
Challenging topic of hoarding and relationship conflict.
Understanding and accepting challenges of hoarding disorder.
Improving communication, appreciating efforts, and showing love.
Authenticity in relationships and understanding partner's pain.
Respect partner's wisdom, avoid secrets and betrayal.
Honesty and understanding create helpful solutions.
Fear of hurtful conversations hinders creative solutions.
Setting boundaries is important for relationships.
Progress is non-linear
Seeking respectful closure through difficult conversations is success.
Leaving with integrity and seeking support.
It's important to normalise conflict and focus on repairing relationships through understanding, communication, and meeting each other's needs.
Importance of embracing differences in love and relationships.
Advocate for needs
Common conflict communication pattern is attack-defend.
Skilled communication improves relationships.
Acknowledging past communication issues, understanding partner's challenges, emphasising authenticity and love in communication.
Authentic empathy and communication are key in addressing relationship struggles and finding mutual understanding and support.
Focus on trust and communication in relationships to address hoarding issues.
Discussing how to handle hoarding sensitively and considering different scenarios before making decisions.
Honest communication and creativity in relationships.
Fear of difficu

Podcast show notes and transcript: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/

Today, chronic disorganisation with our special guest, Jo Cooke of Hoarding Disorders UK.

Chronic disorganisation impacts day-to-day living, from time management to project completion, and is closely connected to hoarding behaviours.

Jo’s written a whole book on the topic, so join us as we look into the overlap between chronic disorganisation and hoarding, executive dysfunction, and the impact of grief, trauma, and loss on these issues.

In today’s episode, I talk about holding yourself accountable by yourself. Then I talk about holding yourself accountable if you’ve got an accountability buddy. And then I’m going to talk about holding yourself accountable if you don’t have anybody that you can talk about hoarding with. Because those are 3 really different situations with really different pros and cons and approaches and benefits as well.