823 episodes

The Art of Charm is where self-motivated people, just like you, come to learn from the company’s coaches about to how to master human dynamics, relationships, and becoming your best self with the help of Johnny and AJ, the company’s founders. Johnny and AJ bring their 11 years of coaching experience from their famous Bootcamps, where they host clients in Los Angeles from all over the world and they share their stories, best practices and themselves on this weekly podcast. Not only does The Art of Charm help everyday people, including active members of the military, learn how to become higher performers, better spouses, partners, and coworkers, they dig deep into human behavior, the science behind it, and demystify what we do and why we do it.

The Art of Charm The Art of Charm

    • Education
    • 4.7 • 10.6K Ratings

The Art of Charm is where self-motivated people, just like you, come to learn from the company’s coaches about to how to master human dynamics, relationships, and becoming your best self with the help of Johnny and AJ, the company’s founders. Johnny and AJ bring their 11 years of coaching experience from their famous Bootcamps, where they host clients in Los Angeles from all over the world and they share their stories, best practices and themselves on this weekly podcast. Not only does The Art of Charm help everyday people, including active members of the military, learn how to become higher performers, better spouses, partners, and coworkers, they dig deep into human behavior, the science behind it, and demystify what we do and why we do it.

    4 Relationship Killers and How to Beat Them | Toolbox

    4 Relationship Killers and How to Beat Them | Toolbox

    In today’s episode, we cover the four horsemen of relationship dynamics with AJ, Johnny, and Coach Michael. 

    We all encounter four dynamics in our personal and professional relationships, so what are they, what is the best way to approach each one to minimize conflict, and in the case of conflict, what makes for the best and worst apologies?

    What to Listen For

    The Four Horsemen of Relationship Dynamics: Criticism – 0:00

    What are the four primary relationship dynamics?

    What’s the best way to handle criticism in a relationship?

    How do you effectively give criticism in a relationship without angering or upsetting your partner?



    Defensiveness – 15:35

    What are the 3 ways defensiveness shows up in relationships and how should you approach each one?

    What is the worst kind of apology?

    What makes a good apology?



    Stonewalling – 27:42 

    What is stonewalling and why does it do so much damage to relationships?

    What is the best way to handle a friend or partner who stonewalls in response to potential arguments?



    The Final Straw: Contempt – 44:14 

    What is the best predictor of divorce?

    Why do you start feeling contempt for your partner?

    What strategies can you use to break the cycle of feeling contempt for someone? 


    Nobody likes feeling criticized, but it’s an unavoidable part of every relationship and we have to know how to give and receive criticism effectively in order to grow. The key is to learn how to give criticism in a way that doesn’t damage your relationship or make your partner feel defensive. If you can learn how to recognize and manage stonewalling, defensiveness, and contempt, you’ll be on the right track to maintaining a happy and healthy relationship with your partner, friends, family, and coworkers. 

    A Word From Our Sponsors

    Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

    You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

    Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.

    But there’s something you can do about it.

    After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.

    We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

    To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

    Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

    Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

    Resources from this Episode
    The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling

    Check in with AJ and Johnny!
    AJ on Instagram
    Johnny on Instagram
    The Art of Charm on Instagram
    The Art of Charm on YouTube
    The Art of Charm on TikTok
    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 1 hr 4 min
    Accomplish Your Dreams With This Proven Bucket List Formula | Ben Nemtin

    Accomplish Your Dreams With This Proven Bucket List Formula | Ben Nemtin

    In today’s episode, we cover chasing your dreams with Ben Nemtin. Ben is a #1 New York Times bestselling author, co-founder of The Buried Life movement, and inspirational keynote speaker who has delivered over 500 keynotes to brands and Fortune 500 companies.

    Introduction
    It’s easy to get caught up in the daily grind and forget about all the things we want to accomplish in life, so what can you do to create a bucket list that excites you, surround yourself with people who encourage you to chase your dreams, and share the bucket list in such a way that fires you up and motivates you?

    What to Listen For

    Introduction – 0:00

    How did The Buried Life tv show get started?



    Discomfort Means Growth – 13:36

    What are the 3 kinds of people around you who will encourage or discourage you from chasing your dreams?

    How do you find people who will support you in accomplishing your goals and dreams?



    Creating the Best Bucket List – 25:46 

    What’s the best way to create a bucket list to accomplish all the things you want to in life?

    What should you avoid when planning your bucket list to make sure you actually get your bucket list done?



    The Power of Sharing Your Bucket List – 40:14 

    Why does sharing your bucket list and talking about what’s on your bucket list make it easier for you tackle it?


    A Word From Our Sponsors

    Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

    You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

    Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.

    But there’s something you can do about it.

    After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.

    We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

    To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

    Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

    Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

    Resources from this Episode
    The Bucket List Journal
    Ben Nemtin’s website
    Ben Nemtin on Instagram
    The Buried Life

    Check in with AJ and Johnny!
    AJ on Instagram
    Johnny on Instagram
    The Art of Charm on Instagram
    The Art of Charm on YouTube
    The Art of Charm on TikTok
    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 1 hr 14 min
    How to Get Good at Quitting and Achieve Greater Success | Annie Duke

    How to Get Good at Quitting and Achieve Greater Success | Annie Duke

    In today’s episode, we cover quitting with Annie Duke. Annie is a national best-selling author, former professional poker player, corporate speaker, and consultant in the decision-making space, as well as Special Partner focused on Decision Science at First Round Capital Partners, a seed stage venture fund. Annie’s latest book is Quit: The Power of Knowing When to Walk Away. 
    Quitting has acquired a bad reputation in a culture of grit and hustle, but even the most successful people quit things they’re working on frequently, so what is stopping you from quitting a failing project or relationship, and what questions can you ask yourself and others to determine when the right time to quit is?
    What to Listen For

    Introduction – 0:00

    Why is knowing to quit just as important as grit and determination?

    How do you know when to quit? – 14:58

    Why do many of us quit things too late and waste valuable time that we could be spending on the next success?

    What are some great examples of people making the right decision to quit?

    Opportunity Cost Neglect – 33:26

    What is the blindspot that keeps us from quitting at the right time?

    What happened to the game Glitch before Slack was created?

    How do you break the Sunk Cost Neglect cycle so you stop wasting your time?

    Other Biases and Blindspots – 44:30

    What is Escalation of Commitment?

    What is the Status Quo Bias?

    What is the Omission Comission Bias?

    The Questions to Determine When You Need to Quit – 1:01:20


    After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.
    We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.
    To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc
    Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.
    Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!
    Resources from this Episode

    Annie Duke | The Secret Ingredient to Making the RIGHT Decision When It Really Matters


    Quit: The Power of Knowing When to Walk Away by Annie Duke

    Annie Duke’s website

    Alliance for Decision Education

    After School All Stars

    Renew Democracy Initiative


    Check in with AJ and Johnny!

    AJ on Instagram

    Johnny on Instagram

    The Art of Charm on Instagram

    The Art of Charm on YouTube

    The Art of Charm on TikTok


    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 1 hr 22 min
    The Harvard Happiness Study & What it Takes to Be Socially Fit | Dr. Robert Waldinger

    The Harvard Happiness Study & What it Takes to Be Socially Fit | Dr. Robert Waldinger

    In today’s episode, we cover happiness with Dr. Robert Waldinger. Bob is the director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, a 75-year-long Harvard study of adult life, and the co-author of The Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness.
    Our social fitness was shaken over the last few years thanks to the lockdown, so what can we use from the longest study on happiness to improve our social fitness and rebuild lost relationships?
    What to Listen For

    Introduction – 0:00

    How did the “Harvard Happiness Study” come about?

    What is the Harvard Study of Adult Development and how did it start?

    Social Fitness – 13:01

    What is social fitness and how did the pandemic affect your social fitness?

    The Biggest Motivation for Self Development – 24:18

    What gives you the greatest motivation to improve your life?

    What is the secret to happiness and how do you implement it at any age?

    How do you make new friends? – 37:11

    What should you say when you want to reconnect with someone?

    How to stop feeling lonely?

    How do you start a conversation with a coworker?

    What are unhappy marriages missing? – 46:00

    How do happy couples stay happy forever and how can you implement in your relationship?


    The Harvard Study of Adult Development turned out to be the longest running study about what makes people happy. Considering the increase in mental health issues and loneliness that we experienced over the last few years, the wisdom learned from the study has the potential to help us recover our pre-pandemic social fitness and get back enjoying life again.
    A Word From Our Sponsors
    Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?
    You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.
    Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.
    But there’s something you can do about it.
    After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.
    We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.
    To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc
    Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.
    Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

    Resources from this Episode

    Harvard Study of Adult Development website

    The Good Life: Lessons from the World’s Longest Scientific Study on Happiness

    Dr. Robert Waldinger’s website


    Check in with AJ and Johnny!

    AJ on Instagram

    Johnny on Instagram

    The Art of Charm on Instagram

    The Art of Charm on YouTube

    The Art of Charm on TikTok


    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 1 hr 9 min
    An Intelligent Roadmap for Life's Biggest Decisions | Abby Davisson

    An Intelligent Roadmap for Life's Biggest Decisions | Abby Davisson

    In today’s episode, we cover money and love with Abby Davisson. Abby is a social innovation leader and career development expert, was the president of the Gap Foundation at Gap Inc and a senior leader on the Environmental, Social & Governance team, and is the co-author of Money and Love: An Intelligent Roadmap for Life's Biggest Decisions. 

    Making big decisions in relationships can be intimidating, so what frameworks and strategies can you use to simplify the decision making process and how should you handle conversations around money and having kids with your partner?

    What to Listen For

    Introduction – 0:00

    What proven framework should you use to approach major decisions about money and love in relationships?

    Thinking about Consequences of Making Big Decisions – 19:06

    How should you think about the consequences of decision making?

    How do you know if you want to spend the rest of your life with someone?

    Relationship Compatibility – 29:26

    How can you find out if you are compatible with your partner in the long term?

    How do you approach the conversation of having kids with someone you just married?

    Divorce and Money – 48:30

    How should you approach the conversation around money when you’re thinking about getting married?


    Making major decisions about relationships can be daunting, but if you break it down with a framework and consider all of the potential consequences with regular communication, it becomes much easier. Money is a major factor to consider when getting married because it can cause a lot of arguments and stress in a relationship, to the point that it is one of the most common reasons people state when getting divorced. If you approach these conversations openly and honestly with your partner, you will be able to make the best decision for both of you.

    Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?
    You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.
    Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.
    But there’s something you can do about it.
    After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are referrals in our personal networks.
    We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.
    To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc
    Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.
    Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

    Resources from this Episode

    Abby Davisson’s website

    Money and Love: An Intelligent Roadmap for Life’s Biggest Decisions


    Check in with AJ and Johnny!

    AJ on Instagram

    Johnny on Instagram

    The Art of Charm on Instagram

    The Art of Charm on YouTube

    The Art of Charm on TikTok


    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 1 hr 7 min
    Best of 2022: 6 Tips for Success in the New Year

    Best of 2022: 6 Tips for Success in the New Year

    In today’s episode, we cover the Art of Charm’s best episodes from 2022 with AJ and Johnny. 
    Turbocharge your social skills going into 2023 with highlights from the best of the Art of Charm podcast in 2022!
    What to Listen For

    Introduction – 0:00

    Avoid these Low Value Behaviors – 2:41

    What 3 behaviors do you need to avoid if you want to attract high value friendships and relationships?

    Eye Contact for Different Situations – 16:34

    How do you decide what kind of eye contact you should give in personal, professional, and romantic situations?

    Overcome Perfectionism – 19:22

    What steps can you take to overcome perfectionism?

    What are the warning signs that perfectionism is controlling your life?

    Setting and Enforcing Boundaries – 28:22

    How do you enforce boundaries you set with other people who keep violating your boundaries?

    Overcome Nice Guy Syndrome – 38:02

    What are covert contracts and why do “nice guys” make them with people they meet?

    What is the biggest flaw of nice guys and how do you stop being a “nice guy” if you are one?

    The Infamous Awkward Pause – 45:17

    How do you make awkward pauses into powerful pauses that command attention?

    What mistakes do most people make that kill their charisma?


    2022 was a great year here at the Art of Charm. We hope you had a great year as well and wish you nothing but the best in 2023! See you next year!

    A Word From Our Sponsors
    Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.
    Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

    Resources from this Episode
    Avoid These 3 Low Value Behaviors (Toolbox)
    How To Read Body Language | Abbie Maroño
    Perfectionism: The Enemy Of Progress | Jennifer Kemp
    Build and Maintain Boundaries | Nedra Tawwab
    Overcoming Nice Guy Syndrome | Dr. Robert Glover
    How to Influence and Persuade People | Zoe Chance
    Check in with AJ and Johnny!
    AJ on Instagram
    Johnny on Instagram
    The Art of Charm on Instagram
    The Art of Charm on YouTube
    The Art of Charm on TikTok
    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 1 hr 3 min

Customer Reviews

4.7 out of 5
10.6K Ratings

10.6K Ratings

JStoneCo ,

Entertaining. Engaging. Educational.

The perfect blend of book smarts and humor. Jordan has a knack for interviewing people and getting them to open up and have real conversations. I tuned into the Noah Kagan episode (if you haven't checked it out you should) and I found myself rewinding multiple times because it was funny and very informative. I especially enjoyed when Noah shared his process for reverse engineering a desired result. It's a simple process that can benefit anyone in almost any situation. For example, Noah mentioned that he reversed engineered his clothing choices when he desired a particular response - and he wasn't talking about wearing anything weird or graphic. He also gave an example of how to create content that has a much greater chance of going viral. The alternative being content that gets little to no readership or views, and certainly no likes or shares.

I'm very impressed with the high level of content and the delivery.

If you're looking to improve your communcation in dating, business, networking, or in any other area this show can help you.

Drew Silver ,

Wow

These guys have an awesome show running. You will not be able to find a better regularly updated source for knowledge on the subject of social dynamics. They have big name guests, an awesome community forum on their website, and they host some really awesome events in various cities. Check 'em out!

sheershir ,

Awesome Hosts, Phenomenal Show

By far the best free source of information on social dynamics and the world of dating. AJ and Jordan's motives behind the podcast are purely altruistic, and it shows in every single episode. Not only do they really know their stuff, but they bring on a wide range of guests who have particular insights in specific areas of dating that have proved absolutely invaluable to me during my ongoing personal transformation. These guys rock!

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