Welcome AWESOME AUTHENTIC WIFE
We are so glad you found us because that means you have a burning desire to give your kids the family all of you deserve... with a marriage that models a healthy relationship.
You are in the right place.
Here at The Authentic Wife, we know all too well the challenges of raising your kids and loving your husband and you need more than just great resources (which we have) you also need a strong support system (we have that too).
I'm Beth Rowles, Family Alchemist and author of The Authentic Wife, and I'll be your host.
10: How to Have Better Communication With Your Husband
1. The biggest problem with the way we communicate now is that we're not even aware that our energy is matching theirs
a. They go into fear
b. We drop into fear and find a story to match it
c. We both end up on the defense the whole time and no one gets anywhere
2. When we are able to stay in an authentic place, this energy of love and not fear, then we can truly listen to their needs and express ours
a. From a place of love I can hear the little boy inside who's scared
b. We can get to the real thing below the words you're saying
3. When someone comes at us with an "when you BLANK I feel BLANK" they're trying to make us responsible for their triggers, their emotions
a. Only from a place of empathy can we help them process the trigger or emotion beneath what they're saying
b. Most communication issues come down to wanting to be understood but not wanting to understand
Download 30 Texts to Get More Help here: www.bethrowles.com/marriage
9: How to Find a Balance That Works for Both Partners in Sex Life After Having Children
This episode is about navigating differing desires and needs in the bedroom, especially as a busy mom who already feels pretty overwhelmed by motherhood itself.
I talk about:
1. You should never do it when depleting emotions are present around it.
a. If you feel angry, resentful, hatred, disgust, etc.… it's not the time for sex
b. My theory is that if we're not feeling like we can raise our current children well at the moment, we won't be in the mood for sex even if having more children isn't a possibility… at a deeper level we shut down to it. It's like our body's like woah lady you're drowning now is NOT the time
c. You have to get clear on what your soul is asking you to do to make sure you have a better partnership and stop taking on everything alone
2. We have different needs
a. Men need it differently than women do, to them it's the way they feel the energy of your love… remember they aren't empaths as often as we are, they aren't picking up on your energy, but touch can bring them right into connection with it
b. There's nothing wrong with a quickie when you're just kind of feeling neutral about it… remember that to men it feels like a pretty real need and when we agree to be monogamous we do have some level of responsibility to allow them to meet that need with us
3. Sex is an energetic exchange first and foremost
a. If you're going into it with the intention to make him happy or feel wanted, you need to explore those inner child needs first… you can't come to the bed with that kind of baggage and experience sex the way it's meant to be experienced, it will never fill you up
b. Your intention should be for him to feel your love and for you to receive his
You're looking to have a connection with your higher self or soul during the experience, it is so much more than what our society has sadly made it out to be
Be sure to read Quantum Love by Dr. Laura Berman and you might also be interested in this blog: https://bethrowles.com/3-things-unhappy-wives-wish-their-husbands-knew/
8: [Story time] What It's Like Being a Daughter of Divorce
In this episode, I share my story of how my parents' divorce impacted my life. If you've ever wondered what life would be like for your children if you were to get a divorce, this may give you some insight on what it feels like. Thank you for joining me for this vulnerable share. If you'd rather read it, you can visit https://bethrowles.com/what-its-like-being-a-daughter-of-divorced-parents/
7: How Authenticity Ends Anxiety For Moms
If you're an anxious mom, this one's for you. Let's talk about how becoming more authentic ends anxiety for moms. We discuss:
When we don't have a healthy model, but the stakes are high (with our kids), we feel so much pressure to get it right that we rely on what we know, which is our intellect and gaining knowledge to know the way forward
But this creates a ton of anxiety, and our old way of just controlling everything to feel safe stops working because now we have humans in the mix, and we can't control other humans
So we're looking everywhere for the right way to do things, and realizing that this huge deficit that we feel is, in fact, our inability to feel our emotions and use their guidance
So to get out of this cycle of trying to control the crap out of everything and feeling endless anxiety, we have to learn how to DO less and BE more, how to mind our thoughts, how to live in the present moment, how to trust that the energy coursing through our body in the form of emotions is here to guide us
And we have to stop caging ourselves, our kids, or our husband with expectations from old belief systems… that model never worked anyway and wasn't healthy.
You can check out my masterclass on emotions, Royally Guarded on my website, www.theauthenticwifeandmom.com
6: The Myth of The 5 Love Languages
Did you know that the 5 love languages model has been debunked? Studies show that it's ineffective at improving relationships. But do you know what works? Self-Regulation! AND the female in the relationship has the most impact on changing it.
In this show, I break down the differences between love and care, why self-regulation matters, and what to explore as inner work based on your own "love language."
Read more about it on my blog as well: https://bethrowles.com/5-love-languages-debunked/
5: A Better Word For Wife
Does the word 'wife' bother you? Do you know its origins? What unconscious intention goes with the idea of being a 'wife' or having a husband? Let's talk about why it bothers you to think of yourself as a wife, the differences between men and women, and how you can start looking at your husband differently to begin to improve your marriage.
You can buy The Authentic Wife: Uncaging Yourself Through Marriage on Amazon: https://amzn.to/2OcaNUJ