Good Mood Revolution Matt O'Neill

Stressful times can steal our joy if we let them. But you can choose joy during times of stress if you know the techniques. In this episode, Dr. Lauren Mellin explains her method for choosing joy called Emotional Brain Training. It is more effective for long-term happiness than just “thinking positive.”

Lauren shares powerful techniques for overcoming stress and negative emotions through accessing your unconscious mind and rewiring unhelpful brain patterns. Listen to learn about the 5 levels of stress and simple exercises you can do to shift your state from anxiety or overwhelm into a place of calm and purpose. 

Lauren also discusses the importance of community in her Emotional Brain Training program. Tune in today for an uplifting discussion on prioritizing your mental health and staying connected to joy even during challenging times.

Here are some power takeaways from today’s conversation: 


How to stay feeling your best


The 5 levels of stress


Stress as the “new joy”


The difference between CBT and EBT


The importance of social connection in emotional brain training



[04:37] How to Stay Feeling Your Best

Laurel talks about being in a state of joy, or "Brain State 1" as she calls it. In this state, your thinking brain and emotional brain are connected, making you feel naturally spiritual. You also feel closely connected to your body and aware of your emotions. When in this state, you feel a sense of higher purpose. However, as humans we have bodies evolved for survival, which can cause stress responses that disconnect us from this joyful state. Therefore, we need to use techniques like emotional brain training to outsmart how our bodies deal with stress, so we can stay feeling our best and most connected.

[05:46] The 5 Levels of Stress


Brain State 1 - Everything is wonderful and you feel love, gratitude, hope, etc.


Brain State 2 - You're okay but don't feel very inspired.


Brain State 3 - Your feelings are scattered and you feel a bit anxious or stressed.


Brain State 4 - You feel stuck in your body and not very good.


Brain State 5 - Your brain feels absolutely split and you may experience extremes in emotions and behaviors.



[28:36] Stress as the New Joy

Laurel explains that getting triggered down to Brain State 5, the lowest state, can be reframed as an opportunity rather than something negative. When in state 5, you can use emotional brain training techniques to clear out "clutter" in the deeper, unconscious parts of your brain. This prevents you from carrying painful emotions with you long-term. She wants people to see state 5 as a chance to change your brain's wiring so you don't have to constantly feel on edge. With EBT, stress can become "the new joy" by using it as a way to process emotions and feel relief.

[30:50] CBT vs. EBT: Targeting Thoughts vs. Emotions

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) focuses on changing negative thoughts to improve mood and behavior, while emotional brain training (EBT) addresses the deeper unconscious emotions behind thoughts. EBT uses techniques to access and process underlying emotions quickly through the body's sensations, in order to rewire unhelpful brain circuits and maintain a state of joy and connection between the thinking and emotional parts of the brain.

Resources Mentioned: 

Emotional Brain Training

1-2-3 Joy! 

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About the Guest 

Dr. Laurel Mellin is a psychologist and author who has been developing techniques in emotional brain training for over 40 years. She founded the Emotional Brain Training program and app to help people access their unconscious minds, process negative emotions quickly, and rewire unhelpful brain circuits to maintain a state of joy

Did you know feelings like worry are our brains' way of protecting us? However, they can become problematic when they trigger repetitive negative thoughts. 

In this episode, Matt O'Neill interviews neuroscientist Alex Korb to discuss how common emotions like worry, anxiety, anger, and self-criticism are natural brain functions, not personal failings. 

Learn simple strategies – backed by neuroscience – to improve mood and happiness. Understand why our brains experience these emotions and learn how you can manage them through mindfulness instead of judgment. This episode will leave you feeling empowered rather than critical of yourself. 

Here are some power takeaways from today’s conversation: 


Why the brain experiences emotions like worry and self-criticism 


Understanding different brain wiring and personality traits


Managing emotions through mindfulness and self-compassion


The importance of exercise, sleep, gratitude, and taking action



[03:22] The Purpose of Worry and Self-Criticism

Worry evolved as a brain mechanism to avoid threats by thinking through problems and solutions, utilizing the prefrontal cortex similarly to playing chess. The amygdala provides emotions like anxiety to motivate protection. Therefore, feelings such as worry and self-criticism stem naturally from how our brains are formed for survival purposes, rather than being inherently negative traits.

[07:29] Unique Brain Wiring and the Value of Self-Acceptance

We all think and act differently based on natural variations. Instead of stressing over what you can't change, focus on your strengths and what really matters to you. If something gets in your way, look at tweaking your approach rather than feeling stuck with who you are. 

[20:40] The Power of Emotion Labeling and Self-Compassion

Simply stating your emotion, like "I'm feeling angry", lets the prefrontal cortex regulate the amygdala. Labeling emotions mindfully while showing self-compassion, not judgment, replaces unhelpful rumination or avoidance with healthy emotional processing. This optimizes the brain's natural regulation abilities.

[29:00] Simple Habits for a Happier Brain

Alex highlights exercise, quality sleep, gratitude, and taking action as important daily habits for brain health and happiness. Small amounts of activity, optimized sleep, focusing on positives through gratitude, and controlling what's within our power can make a big impact per neuroscience.

Notable quotes:

[05:59] Worry in itself isn't a problem. Obsessively worrying is a problem. [06:13]

[17:46] You can't necessarily inherently change your brain's automatic reactivity. [17:54]

[18:17] Having a brain that is emotionally reactive is not a bad thing. What makes it a bad thing is the habits that you've programmed into it that are automatically triggered. [18:36]

Resources Mentioned: 

The Upward Spiral

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Or, reach out on our contact page at GoodMoodShow.com/Contact and we will email you a copy of any free resource you request.

About the Guest 

Alex Korb is a neuroscientist who studies depression and the brain. His book “The Upward Spiral” explains what happens in the brain during depression and provides strategies for improving mood based on scientific research.

Learn powerful strategies for maintaining a positive mindset in the face of major life changes and challenges. In this powerful discussion, Matt O’Neill shares how he navigated massive losses in his real estate business to emerge stronger than before through resilience and a growth mindset. Author and speaker Rich Alderton also reveals simple yet impactful techniques for developing "adaptability intelligence" to thrive in times of change.

Here are some power takeaways from today’s conversation: 


Matt faces biggest career challenge with loss of half company revenue


Adaptability as a learnable intelligence


Tips for managing fear and anxiety about uncertainty


Using mindfulness to overcome negativity bias


Inspiring story of replacing lost business volume in one week



[08:09] Adaptability as a Learnable Intelligence

Adaptability is a learnable skill. While people develop technical and soft skills, those skills are only useful in stable environments. Adaptability is the most important skill since it allows people to apply other skills during challenges and uncertainty. It unlocks one's full potential to perform their best regardless of adversities.

[12:29] Why People Resist Change

People resist change due to evolutionary instincts to avoid threats to security and survival. Humans feel fear and anxiety towards alterations as changes posed risks historically. However, this response today can be counterproductive and prevent embracing opportunities from change.

[15:09] How Change Creates Opportunities to Make a Positive Difference

Challenging times allow people to rise to the occasion and make an impact by embracing change. It provides opportunities to help oneself and others – and explore one's capabilities. Status quo, on the other hand, does not offer growth because it only reinforces past behaviors without learning or progressing. Change provides opportunities to make a difference by pushing us out of routines, and compelling creativity to address challenges in new ways that can help others or solve problems innovatively.

[25:45] Resistance vs. Adaptability

Resilience is about bouncing back to the previous state, while adaptability is about bouncing forward to a better state. Resilience focuses on recovering from difficulties, but adaptability enables growth by learning from challenges and finding new opportunities for improvement. An adaptable mindset empowers individuals to not only withstand disruptions but also to thrive in the face of change.

Notable quotes:

[08:42] If you can only be the best that you can be when the waters are calm, then you're not really going to be of very much use to yourself or society. [08:52]

[13:47] We've got to change the way that we perceive change. [13:51]

[15:33] The status quo is only ever going to tell you that what you did yesterday, you can do tomorrow, and you already know that. So you've learned nothing, you've achieved nothing. What's the point of life? [15:43]

[25:45] Resilience is about the ability to bounce back. Adaptability is about the ability to bounce higher. [25:50]

Resources Mentioned: 

www.highperformancechange.com 

Antifragile by Nassim Nicholas Taleb

S.U.M.O. by Paul McGee

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Or, reach out on our contact page at GoodMoodShow.com/Contact and we will email you a copy of any free resource you request.

About the Guest 

Rich Alderton is a speaker and author focused on helping people develop adaptability intelligence. He defines adaptability as a form of intelligence that can be learned and improved through understanding how to manage fear and anxiety about change.

There is a simple act that can lift your spirits - picking up the phone and calling a friend. In this episode, Matt O'Neill interviews social expert Devon Ash about how connecting with others is key to happiness. 

Interacting with and deriving support from others has wide-ranging benefits for mental and physical well-being. When we feel socially engaged, connected, and supported – our mood lifts, stress decreases, and we feel happier and more fulfilled. Listen now to find the social fluency tips that may be just what you need.

Here are some power takeaways from today’s conversation: 


How our social nature means connecting with others improves well-being


Overcoming isolation during the pandemic and learning to say "yes" more often


Real stories that show how developing social skills can transform lives



[02:09] Reaching Out for Support

Devon emphasizes the importance of social connection for our well-being. He advises reaching out to close friends or family when feeling down, as opening up about our vulnerabilities with trusted loved ones can provide much-needed relief. This may not be easy for those struggling to form deep relationships. However, by working on your social skills, you can develop supportive networks where people can feel truly seen and lift each other's moods during tough times.

[04:22] The Importance of Connection

Devon stresses that while some people are more introverted, human beings inherently need social interaction and connection with others. Reaching out to friends may not come naturally for those who struggle with social skills. However, developing the ability to connect is possible with time and practice. Building relationships is a learnable skill, and doing so can help ensure introverts still experience the mental health benefits of spending quality time with close friends and family.

[05:34] Hang Out with Happy People

Devon echoes Matt's advice to surround yourself with upbeat company when feeling down. As Matt discovered firsthand, being in the presence of happy, energetic people can lift one's mood even if they are not close friends. Both Devon and Matt recommend temporarily escaping negative headspaces by attending social events and putting yourself in environments filled with positivity and optimism. Doing so provides a mood boost at a time when you need it most.

Notable quotes:

Devon - [02:10] We are social creatures.  We love feeling connected to people we love when we feel seen. And if you don't feel like you have an outlet for that, it can feel really tough. [02:24]

Devon - [04:22] We might be introverted, but we still need human connection to be fulfilled. [04:29]

Matt - [06:40] When we are feeling hopeless or depressed or overwhelmed by sadness...  reaching out to the people who are our lifelines can help get us out. [06:49] 

Resources Mentioned: 

www.socialfluency.com 

Download this week’s free resource instantly when you sign up for The Good Mood Show newsletter here! 

Or, reach out on our contact page at GoodMoodShow.com/Contact and we will email you a copy of any free resource you request.

About the Guest 

Devon Ash is a social fluency expert who teaches people skills for better social connections and communication in relationships, dating, career, and family.

It’s time to have PASSION in your work-life. In this episode, Kimmy Powell shares how you can discover your true calling.

Kimmy also provides a simple process from her book "The Passion and Purpose Project" that will help you reflect on interests, skills, and childhood dreams. She'll guide you in ruling out wrong fits and taking inspired action. Tune in to hear Kimmy's tips for awakening your inner passion. 

Here are some power takeaways from today’s conversation: 


Awakening the inner child to find your true passion and calling


How to get started with finding your calling


How God guides us from whispers to knocks


Find your path through self-awareness


How to start with the end in mind



[06:19] Awakening the Inner Child to Find Your True Passion and Calling

Think back to what stuff excited you most as a kid before other people shaped your thinking. Remembering what you loved to do then can give you clues to your natural abilities and gifts. Reconnecting with that youthful part of yourself helps bring clarity around your real passions and purpose in life.

[16:30] Finding Your Path Through Self-Awareness

A lot of times people have an idea in their head of what they wanna do that's not realistic. And so, you’ve got to figure out what you really want versus what's actually possible. Cross off options that won't work to get clear on what's truly best for you. It's good to know what you don't want too, because that helps you put all the pieces together to see exactly what job would be the perfect fit.

[19:44] God's Guidance: From Whispers to Knocks

God first gently whispers ideas and insights to you. Then if you don't listen to the whispers, God will start shouting louder messages through more obvious signs or experiences. And if you still don't listen, God may ultimately deliver an experience that "knocks you over the head" – and leaves no doubt about the direction or lesson He is trying to impart.

[27:37] How to Start with the End in Mind

Think about how you wanna be remembered after you're gone - what difference or things you want people to say about you. Having a clear picture of your future self can help with choices now. Beginning by thinking big picture about goals and dreams keeps you focused on truly achieving your full potential.

Notable quotes:

[11:38] The child always knows roughly what they want to be – who they are at their core. [11:43]

[14:42] If you can just find your lane, you don't really need to know where it ends. You just need to know that you're on the right highway. [14:50]

[19:44] God whispers, then God shouts, and then God knocks you over the head. [19:47]

[27:12] Design a life that is centered around you and not so much around what you think you should be – but what you actually are. [27:21]

Resources Mentioned: 

www.kimmykpowell.com 

Download this week’s free resource instantly when you sign up for The Good Mood Show newsletter here! 

Or, reach out on our contact page at GoodMoodShow.com/Contact and we will email you a copy of any free resource you request.

About the Guest 

Kimberly K. Powell is a mentor, author, speaker, angel investor, and serial entrepreneur with 30+ years of expertise in building and scaling multiple seven-figure businesses. She has advised people worldwide to find their true passion through her book, "The Passion and Purpose Project."

Struggling to stay positive? Discover a simple trick to boost your mood anytime, anywhere. In this episode, creative entrepreneur, author, and former spacecraft designer Aliki Samone shares a mindfulness routine that will leave you feeling relaxed and energized. 

Try her 3-minute practice that focuses on getting in touch with what's going on inside you on a mental, physical, and spiritual level – and experience the life-changing power of presence.

Here are some power takeaways from today’s conversation: 


Aliki’s three-phase approach to choosing happiness


The mind-body-spirit exercise


How to shift your perspective to fully live in the moment


Setting a daily alarm to check in with yourself



[02:09] Aliki Samone's Three-Phase Approach to Choosing Happiness

Aliki discusses three phases in your approach to choosing happiness: mental tools, planning techniques, and execution habits. Get into a good mood so you can live your best life and make those plans for the future by focusing first on the mental tools. 

[02:32] The Mind-Body-Spirit Exercise

Aliki suggests asking yourself these three questions as part of the mind-body-spirit exercise:


What is my mind feeling like right now? - Are you feeling anxious, stressed, calm, joyful? 


What does my body feel like right now? - Are there tensions, pains, or areas of discomfort? A relaxed, energized body often indicates a relaxed mindset as well.


What is my spirit telling me? - The spirit represents one's soul, passion, and purpose. It leads to reconnecting with inner wisdom and strength.



[06:38] Shifting Your Perspective to Fully Live in the Moment

Once you've checked in with your current mental, physical, and emotional state through the mind-body-spirit exercise, Aliki recommends learning from the present experience. Take a deep breath, smile, and ask yourself: "What's an awesome thing I can do today?" or "What's an awesome way I can change my mindset?"

[07:25] Setting a Daily Alarm for Self-Reflection

Setting an alarm is a good way to practice the mind-body-spirit exercise. Choose a calming sound to go off once or multiple times per day at set times as a reminder to pause activities. Then spend a few minutes reflecting on your current mental, physical, and emotional state through asking the three key questions. This helps you build the routine of self-awareness and mood monitoring as a daily habit over time.

Notable quotes:

[02:09] A good mood will lead you to your best life. [02:12]

[05:36] Your spirit is this connection between your heart and your soul – and that is where your passion and your fire for life grows. [05:46]

[06:38] Learn from the now, live in the moment, and take a deep breath. Smile, and ask yourself, what's an awesome thing I can do today or an awesome way I can change my mindset so that I am in the best mood? [06:56]

Resources Mentioned: 

www.conqueryoursummit.com 

Connect with Aliki on Instagram @thesummitmethod

Download this week’s free resource instantly when you sign up for The Good Mood Show newsletter here! 

Or, reach out on our contact page at GoodMoodShow.com/Contact and we will email you a copy of any free resource you request.

About the Guest 

Aliki Samone is a dynamic entrepreneur and author of the book Conquer Your Summit: How to Build a Five-Year Plan and Live Your Best Life. Aliki is a former spacecraft designer who started her own company and shares tips on feeling good.